Blackburn Rovers had a holiday party this week, and their party ended horribly. Manager Henning Berg was asked to perform a silly dance and was so offended that he stormed out of the party.
That got us thinking: How could other football teams' holiday parties go horribly wrong? This is actually very predictable.
- Cristiano Ronaldo throws a fit because Kaka always gets to play one of the angels in Real Madrid's Christmas plays, and he doesn't.
- Peter Vermes thinks that Sporting KC's party is a Thanksgiving party. When he is told it is a Christmas party, he demands that a Thanksgiving party be held anyway.
- Gerard Pique offers Xavi eggnog, and Xavi declines by saying "No, I'll pass".
- Michael Dawson accidentally brushes Gareth Bale as he walks past him, and Bale goes flying into the punch bowl.
- Steve Kean refuses to leave after the building after the party is over, laughing in the dark by himself. No one knows what party he went to anyway.
- Aaron Ramsey tries to put a dimly lit star on the Christmas tree and the whole thing falls apart.
- Milan's players are informed that the Christmas party has been sold to balance the team's accounts.
- Upon signing for Cruz Azul, Teo Gutierrez decides to take everyone paintballing after everyone has way too many drinks at their Christmas party.
- Raheem Sterling scrolls through his baby mommas on his phone to make sure "Mary" is not on the list.
- A child confuses Sam Allardyce for Santa at West Ham's Christmas party. Big Sam has his entire midfield kick him.
- Zenit supporters show up at anyone's party.
- Manchester City inexplicably puts Mario Balotelli in charge of planning their holiday party, and he moves it to the local women's prison.