Santos Laguna Manager Unilaterally Merges United States And Canada

Santos Laguna manager Benjamín Galindo has made the United States and Canada one country. They are now to be treated as the same, and he probably expects the United Nations to confirm this country merger in the next week or two.

After Santos' 1-1 draw with Toronto FC, which Santos finished with 10 men and then had another man shown a red card after the final whistle, Galindo lashed out at American referee Ricardo Salazar. Galindo felt his team did not get its fair share of calls and he figured out why Salazar treated them so badly, too.

"American referees shouldn't referee Americans," Galindo said.

Ah, yes. It's horribly unprofessional in an international tournament to have the referee be from the same country as one of the teams playing is terrible. That's why CONCACAF was wrong to assign an American, Salazar, to referee a match with an American team, Toronto.

Consulting a map ...

Wait! Toronto is in Canada! That isn't in the United States! And Santos had as many Americans in their starting lineup, one, as Toronto did. This Galindo fella, he's a clever one.

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