Premier League, Week 33 Preview And Fixtures: Bank Holidays Mean No Days Off

Wesley Hoolahan of Norwich City is closed down by Sandro and Scott Parker of Spurs during the Barclays Premier Leauge match between Norwich City and Tottenham Hotspur at Carrow Road. (Photo by Jamie McDonald/Getty Images)

Tottenham Hotspur, Chelsea and Newcastle all play on Monday, meaning the race for fourth could get shaken up considerably.

Monday is a bank holiday in the United Kingdom. Americans have to go back to work a day after Easter. Have fun watching the holiday football from your office while trying to avoid getting caught by your boss, America!

Everton vs. Sunderland

Monday, 10:00 a.m. ET, 3:00 p.m. local

These teams both have no chance of qualifying for Europe through their league position or getting relegated. The league is going to make them finish the season anyway. Everton do have something to play for, however: They can very realistically finish above Liverpool. That will be good for some lols.

Pick: 1-1 draw

Newcastle vs. Bolton

Monday, 10:00 a.m. ET, 3:00 p.m. local

Hey, a really meaningful game! Newcastle are magically in contention for a top-four place, while Bolton are fighting the drop. Improbably, they're all the way up to 16th after spending most of the season in the drop zone, but they're only one point off the relegation places. They'll probably lose this one at St. James' Park.

Pick: 2-0 Newcastle

Tottenham Hotspur vs. Norwich

Monday, 10:00 a.m. ET, 3:00 p.m. local

Spurs have kind of been super lame lately, including their lametastic 0-0 draw with Sunderland two days ago. Norwich, on the other hand, are always fun even when they play poorly. This kind of seems like it could be a potential upset, but Tottenham beat Norwich pretty easily at Carrow Road earlier in the year.

Pick: 1-0 Tottenham

Aston Villa vs. Stoke City

Monday, 12:30 p.m. ET, 5:30 p.m. local

I'm already snoring in anticipation.

Pick: Who cares? Can't we just skip this?

Fulham vs. Chelsea

Monday, 3:00 p.m. ET, 8:00 p.m. local

Years ago, this was a closely contested derby, though Chelsea were the bigger team even before the big money buyout. It's really not fair these days, but Clint Dempsey is in ridiculously good form, so who knows what might happen. In all likelihood Chelsea will win, but form books are flying out windows across West London at the moment.

Pick: 2-1 Chelsea

Blackburn Rovers vs. Liverpool

Tuesday, 3:00 p.m. ET, 8:00 p.m. local

As a lifetime supporter of FC Schadenfreude, I'm rooting for Liverpool to take a 4-0 lead. That'll get the "Kean Out" chants going. Then Yakubu scores four goals in under 20 minutes, including a 96th minute equalizer, for a 4-4 draw.

Pick: 4-4 draw

Manchester City vs. West Bromwich Albion

Wednesday, 2:45 p.m. ET, 7:45 p.m. local

With no disrespect intended to Arsenal, who played well on Sunday and deserved all three points against Manchester City, it seems pointless to predict the Citizens' games now. They were much more terrible in that game than Arsenal were good. It was a truly relegation-worthy performance, with their title aspirations on the line. They could win or lose this game 6-0 and it would shock no one.

Pick: 3-2 City

Wigan Athletic vs. Manchester United

Wednesday, 2:45 p.m. ET, 7:45 p.m. local

Have you been watching Sir Alex Ferguson's teams for the last four years? Come on, we've seen this game before. United won't really look that good, they'll score a goal, you'll go "they don't really deserve that" and then they'll score two more. Because that's how they play and you can't figure out that it's all in the plan and that it has been for four years because you're dumb. Yes, you.

Pick: 3-0 United

Wolverhampton Wanderers vs. Arsenal

Wednesday, 2:45 p.m. ET, 7:45 p.m. local

Remember when Wolves drew Arsenal 1-1 at the Emirates because Wayne Hennessey stood on his head? Those Wolves aren't a thing anymore.

Pick: 2-0 Arsenal

Queens Park Rangers vs. Swansea City

Wednesday, 3:00 p.m. ET, 8:00 p.m. local

QPR have had the misfortune of playing four consecutive difficult games, against three Sky Six teams and away to Sunderland. They beat Arsenal and Liverpool, both at Loftus Road. That combined with Swansea's road record might lead one to believe that they're going to be underdogs in this one, but all four of Swansea's road wins have come in 2012. Since January, they're actually excellent on the road. This is the toughest game to call and might actually be the most entertaining match of the round.

Pick: 2-1 QPR

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