Chievo Verona vs Catania, final score 0-0: Someone owes me 95 minutes of life

Gabriele Maltinti

Between the two sides, there were 16 shots, five of which were on target. The match looked like it was being played in slow motion and never did anyone come close to scoring. Thanks for stealing my life, Chievo.

Apparently Eugenio Corini looked at the table this morning and realized the seven point lead Chievo have over Siena and Palermo just wasn't enough. But, Chievo being Chievo, that didn't mean they were prepared to go all out at the Bentegodi. Instead, desperately afraid of not securing even a point, the Flying Donkeys continued with their typical game plan: sit back and be as boring as humanly possible.

We get it, Chievo. But, with six games left to play, you're essentially safe. So for the love of god and all the angels, would you please, please, please try to show some skill? And not take such pleasure in wrecking other clubs' hopes and dreams?

Of course, if Chievo had backed off from their game plan and actually introduced a bit of action into the match, I wouldn't have had time to check my Calciatori virtual sticker delivery, muse over whether or not Pablo Barrientos used his one-match suspension to get a fresh haircut, change my Napoli calendar to the correct month, or watch Atalanta - Fiorentina highlights. So maybe I should be thanking the Flying Donkeys?

Anyway, the Chievo strategy worked to break down Catania's game plan, although they get little credit as the strategy remains the same for every game, no matter the opponent's style. the visitors were reduced to sending speculative long balls into the box, which rarely works for a side that measures about 5 foot tall on average. Catania managed just two shots on target in the 90+ minutes, and neither even threatened Chievo.

So: Chievo safe, Catania not going to Europe, and almost two hours of life that I will never get back.

Chievo Verona: Christian Puggioni, Boukary Dramé (Gennaro Sardo 69), Bostjan Cesar, Dario Dainelli, Marco Andreolli, Nicolas Frey, Perparim Hetemaj, Luca Rigoni, Isaac Cofie, Sergio Pellissier, Cyril Théréau (Mamadou Samassa 60)

Catania: Mariano Andujar, Giovanni Marchese, Nicolás Spolli, Giuseppe Bellusci, Pablo Álvarez, Marco Biagianti (Sergio Almirón 88) Francesco Lodi (Lucas Castro 75), Mariano Izco, Pablo Barrientos, Gonzalo Bergessio, Alejandro Gómez

Goals: none. zero. zilch. nada. niente.

Cow:

Kirstenislazy_medium

At least we still have Barrientos chillin' with a cow.

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