We are gathered here today to witness the marriage of Tobin Truog and soon-to-be Mrs. Robin Truog. You are an inspiration to us all and it is here that we witness the beauty of marriage among family, friends and the MLS Cup.
But for real, Sporting Kansas City allowed a fan to take the trophy for a day to be a witness at his wedding.
Nothing says love and romance like a giant silver cup and nothing says a great club (and the irrational ridiculousness of sports that we love so much) like going to any length to make sure a trophy will be there for the day two people pledge their undying love together.
And, by the power vested in me by absolutely nobody at all, I pronounce all three of you -- bridge, groom and trophy -- beautifully insane. You may now kiss the bride and defile the MLS Cup.