Seven games, no wins for the Portland Timbers. Caleb Porter's team was supposed to be improved from last season, but they're seriously struggling. They put together a decent performance on Saturday, but couldn't beat Real Salt Lake goalkeeper Nick Rimando, who was spectacular again.
Meanwhile, in Dallas, there's something a bit magical going on that resembles what happened in Denver last season. Oscar Pareja has FC Dallas in first place, and given how well the Rapids fared last season with a bunch of rookies leading the way, no one is too surprised.
But we start in the Eastern Conference, which we can't just shove into a corner and ignore. It's kind of half the league.
Union 0-0 Dynamo
Dominic Kinnear was perfectly okay with getting an away draw and John Hackworth didn't know what to do about it. This game featured a hilarious red card for Dynamo right back Kofi Sarkodie, who picked up a second yellow for time-wasting on a throw-in.
Fire 1-1 Revolution
Quincy Amarikwa scored again in this match, giving him a four on the season, a new career-best for one campaign. The Revs equalized from the penalty spot after an ill-advised challenge by Patrick Nyarko. Chicago finished the match with 10 men after Amarikwa was sent off, but they should have won the match. New England's Kevin Alston was sent off for denying a clear goal-scoring opportunity at the death, but the Fire missed the ensuing penalty. You can watch the bonkers finish to this match right here.
Rapids 0-0 Earthquakes
The Rapids are much less fun in a post-Pareja world.
Whitecaps 2-2 Galaxy
These teams had to play each other for the second week in a row, and the Galaxy nearly pulled off a second straight win. They took the lead on two occasions, but managed to throw away both. Vancouver's second equalizer was scored by Kekuta Manneh, and you can watch it right here.
Crew 1-1 D.C. United
The Columbus Crew went down in the first half and were taken down to 10 men late in the second half, but pulled out a stellar late goal to save a point. Their defending was poor on Fabian Espindola's opener, but they made up for it. Bernardo Anor was sent off for a nasty challenge on Perry Kitchen in the 81st minute, which should have sealed the result for DC, but Wil Trapp had other ideas. He provided the excellent setup on the equalizer for Hector Jimenez, who beat Andrew Dykstra from the edge of the box in stoppage time.
Sporting KC 4-0 Impact
The Montreal Impact are not a good team at all. Sporting Kansas City went up on an own goal by Callum Mallace in the 31st minute, but struggled until doubling their lead through Aurelien Collin on a 71st minute set piece. But from there, the rout was on, and Dom Dwyer scored twice late to make the score an embarrassing one.
FC Dallas 2-1 Toronto FC
After taking a week off, Michael Bradley returned to the TFC lineup on Saturday, though he still didn't look his best. Issey Nakajima-Farran put Toronto ahead in the 21st minute, taking advantage of some poor defending by Stephen Keel, but FCD improved as the match went on. They equalized in the 37th minute through Matt Hedges off a corner, then found a late winner from Blas Perez on a long free kick.
RSL 1-0 Timbers
This might have been the best performance the Portland Timbers have put together this season, but they're still in search of their first win. Max Urruti was poor in front of goal, missing numerous chances, while Nick Rimando came up with huge saves on the shots the Timbers did hit on target. Rimando's save on Gaston Fernandez's long-range strike, in particular, will probably win save of the week in MLS. The winner was scored by Ned Grabavoy, who placed an impressive low finish past Donovan Ricketts from 15 yards in the second half.
Chivas USA 1-2 Sounders
The Seattle Sounders got off to an awful start, conceding a penalty that 'Cubo' Erick Torres converted just five minutes in, but they fought back for a win. Lamar Neagle scored the equalizer off an error by Dan Kennedy and assist by Clint Dempsey, sending the teams into the second half level. Marco Delgado was shown a straight red card in the 73rd minute, giving the Sounders a clear avenue to a victory. Obafemi Martins came up with the winner, with Dempsey providing the assist yet again.