Tag: calm down it's satire

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After 30-Day free trial, LaFontaine leaves Netflix

(humor) Pat LaFontaine, who has a history of quickly leaving NHL front office jobs, is done with Netflix just 30 days after joining the streaming video service.

Katz announced drug specifically for Oilers fans

(humor) Oilers owner Darryl Katz announced a new herbal supplement designed to increase spectator's enjoyment of the team. All-natural OILERSOMA is safe, effective and guaranteed to make watching and discussing the Oilers more blissful than ever.

Squatters turn Dodger Stadium rink into skate park

(humor) Dozens of squatters and skateboarders have occupied the site of Saturday's NHL Stadium Series game at Dodger stadium, according to L.A. county police reports. After the Ducks and Kings left, the skaters and graffiti artists moved in.

Putin awards self three gold medals at Sochi

(humor) Russian president Vladimir Putin awarded himself three gold medals at the Sochi games this week, in newly-added events Diplomacy, Sports Spectacle Hostmanship and Men's Prisoner Pursuit Biathlon.

NHL Guardians sign contract with ECHL

(humor) The Guardian Project is coming back, three years after its last adventure. The team of super heroes based on NHL teams has signed a one-year contract with the ECHL and has changed their names and powers to adapt to their new namesakes.

Letter: Panthers offer arena as timeshare

In a letter sent to fans and obtained by SB Nation, we've learned that the Florida Panthers are offering up their arena in Sunrise as a timeshare.

Sochi snubs declare Slovenian citizenship

Over a dozen players left off their country's national teams will be suiting up for Slovenia in Sochi.

Intern ejected from NHL Super Bowl party after hit

First-year unpaid employee Parker Vandervale could face a suspension pending a review from the NHL's human resources department for hitting marketing assistant Tom Jaacks at the league's annual Super Bowl party. (humor)

Buffalo to hire next GM through reality TV show

Buffalo's Next Top General Manager! will be the first television game show to offer a management position with an NHL team as its grand prize.

Thornton sends Orpik fruit basket

The "NHL I'm Sorry" basket from Edible Arrangements was designed with pro hockey players and injures in mind.

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