Hey Braves Fans! I am going to school at Clemson and me and a some sorority sisters are thinking about going to see a Braves game the weekend they play the Cardinals as a little end of the semester trip. Since I use StubHub all the time for Cardinals games in St. Louis we were planning on using StubHub for these tickets too. But since I have only been to Turner Field once before and I was like 7, I was wondering if y'all could give me some suggestions about where to sit. I like sitting in the lower deck and I know StubHub usually has great deals for those seats at Busch. Specifically though I was wondering what the bleachers are like. I know at Wrigley they're pretty much just awful but at Busch they are very nice with a lot of families and friendly people while still being affordable. So I am sure the bleachers cannot possibly be as horrendous as the Cubs' bleachers but are they a lot like the Cardinals' bleachers as I have described at Busch? Thanks so much! When they aren't playing the Cardinals I always cheer for the Braves so god luck this season!

 

Andi_k and I started working on this awhile ago and then kind of stopped because we both got busy. Luckily I think we stopped basically after we had most of the work done. But this is what we came up with.

Each player is judged on three statistics: DAR- Dreaminess Above Replacement, GWR- Grace While Running for position players or DID- Distraction Independent Delivery for pitchers, and SXYMS- Sexiness Adjusted for Mental Stability. We used both leagues to create the roster so this is an Inter-league team. 

Here we go:

C Joe Mauer

via phrenetical.files.wordpress.com

DAR- 10 I don't think this needs explanation.

GWR- .398 He may not be the most graceful runner in a traditional sense but he has a sort of rugged grace.

SXYMS- .450 He is pretty stable. But sometimes that stability is sexy. Depends on what you like. He seems pretty personable and genuine as well.

1B- James Loney

via www.freefantasymagazine.com

DAR- 5 Not Dreamy Joe levels of dreaminess but still pretty dreamy.

GWR- .425 He has shown some very nice graceful running. I submit this video for your examination.

SXYMS- .250 After extensive research this girl could find no signs of mental breakdowns, tantrums, or scandals. He seems kind of boring actually. All I can find is stuff about baseball. How disappointing. Maybe andi can shed some light. He was her pick.

2B- Ian Kinsler

via www.herraysbaseball.com

DAR- 8 Look at those brown eyes and pouty lips.

GWR- .760 I think the use of high socks may make him appear more graceful. This is a simple way other players could try to improve their GWR scores.

SXYMS- .350 Pretty stable. Although Ian is married to his high school sweetheart which is so romantic. This has upset many young girls and prompted them to say they hope he cheats on his wife because they would "hit that." (Ian Kinsler Girlfriend Forum everyone. Good stuff.)

3B- Evan Longoria

via www.motleyhealth.com

DAR- 5 He is definitely more silly and happy-go-lucky than dreamy.

GWR- .425 He is tall and fairly thin. That looks good when running.

SXYMS- .500 Some of you may think that is inflated. But here is my reasoning: He often dresses in rather, shall we say, Ryan Braun-ish clothing. While this is usually a sign to STAY AWAY to me it shows a side that says I must belong and be popular which is very needy. Needy=some mental instability and therefore he scores higher.

SS- Troy Tulowitzki

via extras.mnginteractive.com

DAR- 6 Another case of nice eyes and pouty lips.

GWR- .450 He shows tremendous grace on defense. Shortstop may not be a position that involves a lot of running per se but it does involve quick reflexes and dives and jumps, all things Tulo does with a lot of grace.

SXYMS- .350 Pretty stable. But he married his high school sweetheart which as we discussed with Ian is romantic.

OF- Nick Markakis

via web.minorleaguebaseball.com

DAR- 7 He is referred to as The Greek God in Baltimore, that's dreamy y'all.

GWR- .500 Most outfielders will be rather graceful and Markakis is certainly no exception.

SXYMS- .333 Nick has his own charity for distressed children in Maryland. As an Early Childhood Education I strongly approve.

OF- Jacoby Ellsbury

I feel like the fuzzy birder is appropriate here.

via assets.sbnation.com

DAR- 7 He is Native American, I think that's pretty dreamy.

GWR- .600 Very fast and a very talented base stealer. I love base stealers.

SXYMS- .400 He is actually kind of boring. But he plays for the Red Sox and we all know their affinity for Braun-like behavior and dress. Sort of an Evan Longoria effect.

OF- Grady Sizemore

via withmalice.files.wordpress.com

DAR- 9 I decided no one else was allowed to get a 10 on DAR because Joe Mauer is indeed Dreamy Joe but if anyone could Grady would.

GWR- .800 Yup. http://mlb.mlb.com/media/video.jsp?content_id=5861675

SXYMS- .600 Well, he was boring, but then he had a scandal. So now he is not as boring.

Bench

OF- Colby Rasmus

via hawkfantasysports.files.wordpress.com

DAR- 3 He is too goofy looking and adorable to be very dreamy.

GWR- 1.000 We have discussed this many times and I think Colby is the picture of grace when running.

SXYMS- .200 He is pretty well behaved and I don't know that you could really classify him as sexy, I usually say adorable.

OF- Andre Ethier

via mike100915.files.wordpress.com

DAR- 7 He has dark hair, brown eyes, the epitome of tall, dark, and handsome.

GWR- .600 I think he's pretty graceful.

SXYMS- .400 He is pretty stable but he is very personable judging by his blog he had a few years ago.

C- Lou Marson

via media.scout.com

DAR- 7 I think curly hair helps a lot with dreaminess. Again with the brown eyes, I guess those are dreamy.

GWR- .333 He is a catcher so he is not necessarily a super graceful runner but he isn't bad.

SXYMS- .300 He has not been around long enough to really cause any scandals so at the moment he seems pretty boring.

SP- Zach Greinke

via www.therookiesblog.com

DAR- 8 He is pretty dreamy. I think really blue eyes are also dreamy.

DID- 1.35 He has a very simple, clean delivery. This allows for maximum viewing of his gorgeous self with few distractions.

SXYMS- 1.000 He has had a history of some emotional instability. Plus he uses Sabermetrics to help him pitch, I know y'all appreciate that.

SP- Justin Masterson

via www.rotorob.com

DAR- 6 He has great eyes that really stand out since he also has no hair.

DID- 1.50 He has a pretty simple delivery that also emphasizes his height which is nice.

SXYMS- .500 He gets a high score here for his apparent ability to get along with everyone and generally good attitude. I mean he said he liked Dustin Pedroia! I guess that may be a bad thing...

SP- Adam Wainwright

via media.scout.com

DAR- 8 He is pretty darn dreamy. Look at him!

DID- 1.50 Very simple delivery again.

SXYMS- .500 He is a mix of friendly and tough guy, his tough guy side seems to really bloom around our next pitcher.

SP- Chris Carpenter

via fantasybaseballtips.com

DAR- 8 His dreaminess comes from his tough as nails attitude.

DID- 1.23 Very simple delivery that is a perfect representation of his attitude.

SXYMS- .750 It's that tough guy attitude again.

RP- CJ Wilson

via www.sweetaffliction.com

DAR- 9 I don't know how many of you are aware of this but he is so dreamy y'all. Go here for further evidence.

DID- 2.30 He has a pretty simple delivery. He does have a little leg kick at the end that is a little distracting.

SXYMS- .450 From what I understand CJ doesn't drink and spends a lot of time on the Internet. In fact I think he used to semi-regurlarly comment at Lone Star Ball, the Rangers SBN blog. He also has a very active and pretty good Twitter where I learned he just went to Vancouver to watch some hockey at the Olympics.

RP-Huston Street

via www.indenvertimes.com

DAR- 7 He has great eyes and pouty lips, two very big components of dreaminess.

DID- 1.70 Pretty simple delivery. And he made it look good in the A's ugly uniforms, bonus points.

SXYMS- .425 He is a closer which is very sexy.

Poll

Shortstop?

23%

Derek Jeter

23 votes

10%

Stephen Drew

10 votes

53%

Boog

53 votes

14%

Tulo

14 votes

100 votes | Poll has closed

A Sonnet for Colby, since I don’t make videos

 

A player who glides to catch a ball,

And hits home runs to escape a bind,

Teleports to first to the shock of all,

Such a player must be hard to find.

 

But Colby, Corzy, or Corey Rainbow,

Easily forgotten for not selling it,

Not playing many games in a row,

Can run, catch, dive and of course he can hit.

 

His cowboy accent, carefree attitude

Make interviews a funny adventure

“He could be better… he needs to improve,”

 Says one crotchety, dated announcer.

 

But I love Colby and I always will

For his plays, home runs, and his fine flat bill.

 

 

 

 

So, maybe it's not the best poetic work ever but this is my sonnet for everyone's favorite rookie (or at least mine). Hope you enjoy it. It may not be as epic as the awesome Fire Burning video but like I said I don't do videos. I threw in some nice VEB jokes just for you.