Someone suggested in another thread that the DBN Glossary was due for an update. SB also thinks it's time to update the Joe Thomas's House of Pancakes menu. Since it's the off-season now, and the draft talk is already being beaten into the ground, it seems like as good a time as any to go ahead with something fun and unrelated to the draft, Pat Shurmur's playcalling, Colt McCoy's height, etc.

Continue reading this post »

I approached Chris about doing an off topic post that's a little different than the "what's your favorite ______?" posts that we've had so far, and he liked it.  So, here goes:

You're going to be stranded on a deserted island for 2 years.  Let's assume the island is tropical, like those in Gilligan's Island or Castaway.  You can take only 5 things with you. (Guidelines are listed after the jump)

Continue reading this post »

The DBN Glossary was created last year in an effort to familiarize new members/visitors with the common parlance of the veterans/regulars here at Dawgs By Nature.  Since that time, there have been many new people joining the site on a weekly basis.  Therefore, I'd like to republish the glossary with a couple of additions to bring everyone up to speed and, hopefully, provide explanations for the lunacy at DBN.  These terms pop up frequently, but may be strange to those who haven't been around long.  As before, I'll list those I can think of now, and please feel free to add those that you personally like or that I've missed.

Continue reading this post »

Hey Guys.  I'm coming out to the Pro Football Hall of Fame tomorrow morning, then going up to Cleveland for some shopping/food/adult beverages.  I was hoping some of you locals could give me some tips to make the trip a little better.  Some questions I have:

1. How much time will I need to see everything at the HOF? It's my first time going there.

2. Where's the best place to buy a Browns jersey?

3. Where's the best casual place to have a bite to eat and a couple of beers?

4. Some of you talk about the Greats Lakes Brewing Co.  Is it worth going to on limited time?

Hope to hear from some of you.  Thanks in advance.  DN 

With the large increase in new members/visitors, likely due to the fast approaching NFL Draft, I thought it may be a good time to offer a brief glossary of Dawgs By Nature terms.  These terms pop up frequently, but may be strange to those who haven't been around long.  I'll list those I can think of now, feel free to add those that you personally like or that I've missed.

Buuuuuuuuuuuhhh - coined by Mooncamping, this is an expression of utter disbelief or confusion.

F@#% You, Go Root for Buffalo - an actual email sent by former GM Phil Savage to a disgruntled fan; used here to express displeasure with someone's comment, but mainly in a humorous and sarcastic manner.

Fairly Hog Certain - being fairly certain of something but in a much funnier way, thanks to a typo by Spidey, who wished to express fairly high certainty.

He's a WINNER - sarcastically used to ridicule the idea that team wins is good evidence of the quality and skill of a particular individual player.

This - simple reply to a comment or post that you like or agree with.

Freaky Flanker - coined, again, by Mooncamping; this is a WR who meets Moon's mysterious size/shape scale.

It's (whatever time) on (whatever date), and Braylon Edwards still sucks - used to periodically remind us of the time, the date, and that Braylon Edwards does in fact still suck.

I stopped reading at Mangina - proper response to any troll or "drive-by" poster who still thinks twisting Mangini into Mangina has some level of wit or humor.

For the love of Joe Thomas, I swear to Joe Thomas, etc. - examples of terms that substitute Joe Thomas for a deity, which has become common practice on the site (for obvious reasons).

Smokescreen - used to express any doubt or skepticism toward a move or decison of the Browns staff; also used to express doubt or skepticism toward comments of any other member of this site.

Maybe you should try Cleveland.com - Seemingly polite, yet sarcastic and scathing response to "drive-by", knucklehead posters who make mindless comments.  Example: "WTF?!?! JACK F"N DALHUMME AT QB??!!?! HOCKGREIM MUST GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!I"M DUN WITH THIS LOSER TEAM!!!!!; Reply by someone with a fully functioning brain: "Might I suggest you try Cleveland.com?"

Kotknus(sp) - Accepted and encouraged as the way to spell the surname of former Browns GM George Kokinis; mocks the endless errors made while trying to discuss said executive on this site.  Current czar Mike Holmgren seems to be next in line with such spellings as: Holgram, Hokgram, Holngrem, Holngreim, etc.

Hoheini - One word term used to refer to the current Browns leadership trifecta of Holmgren (Ho), Heckert (he), and Mangini (ini); follows up the one word term of Mankok for Mangini (Man) and Kokinis (kok).

Anyone feel free to jump in and add to these, as I'm sure I've missed some.  I just thought this may be helpful to new members and entertaining for the regulars.  My other idea was a post on who we'd draft at #7... 

For the past two weeks, we've been doing nothing but belly-aching about the state of the team.  Everyone is miserable (football-wise) with no apparent hope in sight.  I thought I'd offer a personal story to perhaps lift some spirits, even if only my own.

About a month ago, my grandfather passed away.  He was the reason I began rooting for the Browns as a child and the reason it carried over throughout my life.  My other grandfather was a Steelers fan, and used to buy me Steeler stuff when I was young, but to no avail.  I stuck with the Brownies because "Pap" did too.

On the night of the AFC Championship Game that featured The Drive, I missed the 4th quarter because Pap was so nervous he couldn't watch and had me walking around the neighborhood in the snow with him, which i gladly did.

Even in recent years, when his health declined and he didn't follow them as closely as he used to, every time I visited Pap we talked about the Browns.  How bad they were, how good they could be "next year", all the usual football talk for Browns fans.  Since the season has started, I've missed him terribly.

That's why when I hear talk of revolts and "I'm done with this team", I have no time for it.  I enjoy the Browns every time I watch them on some level because I know I'm not just rooting for myself anymore.  I'm rooting for more memories to match the ones I had with Pap; holding onto hope to get to where he and I had always talked about and dreamed they would get to. 

I know this team is bad.  But we're Browns fans.  We don't bail out when times get tough.  My grandfather never did, and I never will either.  When we lift that Lombardi Trophy someday, it will be that much sweeter because of what we've been through.  i know when that day comes, I'll shed tears of joy and be proud beyond belief.  But at that point, I won't shed any for Pap.  He'll be watching and loving it every bit as much as I am.

My wife grew up a Steelers fan.  She isn't a really die-hard fan, and I've worked my ass off to convert her.  All of her family are Squeelers fans as well, and I'm constantly subjected to it.  They are very good about it, and my father in law has even started pulling for the Browns when they aren't playing Pittsburgh.  i however cannot return that favor.

Also, one of my grandfathers was a Steelers fan.  When i was about 5 or 6, he gave me a Steelers knit hat that had my name sewn on it.  he was a great guy, but the hat gives me the shakes and makes me want to vomit.  i still have it and keep it as a reminder of how close i may have come to falling into the dark abyss of squeelerdom.

I'm sure there are plenty of families that engage in this "civil pigskin war".  I'd like to hear any similar stories any of you may have.

As Romeo Crennel is obviously one of the worst head coaches in recent NFL history, why even allow him to coach the Pittspuke game?  I think a message should be sent to everyone that this ineffectiveness will not be tolerated.  Make it clear to everyone on the roster that the last game, against our most hated rival, is an audition for whatever coach takes this train wreck over.  Play hard and lay it on the line and you have a spot on the team next year.  Drag ass and play like you just want to get it over with, and you can take a walk, regardless of who you are.

Additionally, the sooner we start negotiations with a new coach, the better.  Give the new guy a chance to scout playoff games and see what free agents from those teams he may like to have play for him.  Give him a chance to get a message to the players before they leave for the off-season, letting them know how he expects them to prepare while they're away.  The only thing that would prevent this is if we're after a coach that's currently employed by one of the playoff teams.  But really, that's not the kind of guy this team needs right now anyway.

Does this sound completely unreasonable, given yesterday's performance?

Browns 27 - Bills 21

BQ = 19 - 30, 220 yds., 2 TD

BE - 4 rec., 75 yds., TD

KW2 - 6 rec., 90 yds., TD

JLew - 85 yds., TD

The Ghost - more touches and more yards.

Phil gets a couple of field goals.

The D will step it up a little tonight;  pressure is off now, because the playoffs aren't realistic anymore.

Or maybe these are all just one ignorant man's hopes for a happy evening...

the reason we all suffer so much is because we as Browns fans allow ourselves to believe.  admittedly, i went into this game excited because i expected them to win and put themselves right back in the hunt.  i believed the team had found their groove and returned to last season's form.  i believed this season was starting to go where we all thought it would.  but the facts are this:

1. DA remains wildly inconsistent, even within the course of a single game.

2. BE's drops have now turned into a mental issue;  it's in his head real bad right now.

3. i'm now off of Chud's bandwagon as well, because the playcalling is absurd.

4. our linebackers are terrible, aside from Hall, but he's still a rookie. D'qwell had a good game, but you can't say he's been a good pick for this team overall.

5. savage seems to offer nothing but excuses for the team's failure, and it's become insulting that he still thinks we'll buy the bullshit he's selling.

6. last, but certainly not least, our head coach isn't anywhere near good enough to hold that particular title; any games won are in spite of him, not because of him.

i get so aggravated by being put in this position of feeling optimistic to only have our hopes almost immediately dashed.  but we'll keep doing it because we're all suckers; not because we keep following the team, because we're good fans and that's what good fans do.  we're suckers because we actually keep finding ways to convince ourselves this is a good football team.  it most certainly is NOT.

from this day forward, i shall refer to DA as The Blind Squirrel.  Occasionally, even he finds a nut, like the one against the Giants.  But typically, he sees nothing, finds nothing, and starves.  Not only that, he's making all of us starve with him.  Romeo has a chance to shoot the blind squirrel and put him out of his misery, except he's too clueless to see the misery we all see.  i'm rambling.  man am i pissed off.

I make this argument based mainly on a Butch Davis "feelin' in my gut":

1. we're coming off a bye week, so we're well rested.

2. we have some guys coming back from injury that should help immediately (Tucker, Stallworth, Jones, etc.)

3. the team knows, whether they admit it publicly or not, this game is the season for them; lose and any slight glimmer of hope is extinguished.

4. there is extra incentive because it's the Giants on Monday night - surely pride makes them want to get revenge for the previous monday debacle against the Giants.

5. the Giants will eventually lose a game; there isn't going to be another undefeated team like NE last year; this could be a trap game for the Giants, due to overconfidence based on our record and what they did to us the last time.

I say Browns 24, Giants 20. 

There's a big difference between getting beat by better teams and playing like losers.  The team has somehow lost the confidence it had last season, when it appeared they all felt like they could win every single game.  Even against New England last year, they played hard and were in that game late despite the final score, even though they had no business being in that game all things considered.  Certainly there are exceptions, like KW2, Jamal, Shaun Rogers.  But attitude typically comes from the top, namely the head coach and the quarterback - what does that says for us then.  Although I sound like an alarmist, it isn't just the first three games of this year that make me feel this way.  Clearly Romeo cannot get this team ready for games, and he couldn't last year either.  Last year was more a result of the team getting some breaks that created an overall buzz, not Romeo creating a tough, winning attitude that made the players give all they had for him.  If there is anyone reading this post that honestly feels Bill Cowher couldn't make this team a Super Bowl contender within 3 years, I'd like to hear from you.