SB Nation User Blog: Doc Whiskey

Things Blues fans can do to help the Blues beat Detroit on Saturday

Doc Whiskey — Thu, 26 Nov 2009 13:39:32 -0000

Feel free to add to this

6. Dress up and talk like the Swedish Chef

5. Two words: Poison Darts

4. Dress like Lion fans (maybe there's a carry over effect for all Detroit teams)

3. Anytime Kariya is on the ice make a lot of noise in the hopes of waking him up

2. Encourage Louie to shove his junk in Zetterberg's face

1. Remind the team that they are the Blues and have already beaten Team Fuckwad twice this year

Do you hate Detroit?

Doc Whiskey — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 01:11:31 -0000

I usually reside at the St. Louis Game Time page, but I figured I would bring this opportunity to you since we have a common enemy. Over on the ESPN America page (that's ESPN for Brits) they currently have a vote up for which game to air live on Friday November 27th. The two choices are Canes/Thrashers or Red WIngs/Flames. We over at Game Time have been voting tirelessly to get the vote swung in favor of the non-Detroit game, but the deficit is quite large so we are looking for some help. You see we feel no Detroit fan should be happy and enjoy themselves, even if they live in the UK. Therefore here is the link, go to the page, vote early and vote often.

For all the Flames haters...

Doc Whiskey — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 01:02:50 -0000

I tend to reside on the St. Louis Game Time page, and over there we take our hate for the Red Wings seriously. With that in mind I present an opportunity for you. Over at the ESPN America site (basically ESPN for Brits) there is a vote up for which game to air live on Friday night November 27th. The choices are Carolina vs. Atlanta or Detroit vs. Calgary. Currently the Detroit vs. Calgary match-up is way ahead, however the folks at the Game Time page have been voting for the Carolina/Atlanta game because even though it doesn't effect us at all, we do not want any Detroit fans to get what they want (even ones that live in the UK). I believe most Edmonton fans feel the same way about Calgary fans. Therefore, I will provide for you the link to the website in hopes you will join us in ensuring neither Detroit or Calgary fans get what they want. Vote early, vote often...here's the link

Playoffs suspension chart

Doc Whiskey — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 22:15:39 -0000

Playoffs suspension chart

Power Play Dance

Doc Whiskey — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 04:34:45 -0000

I will be the first person to say it though I can't possibly be the first person to think it....the power play dance is a fucking curse. I have no idea what kinda of voodoo shit has been invoked when scores of people do this thing, but it is angering someone up above. Think about it, when did the dance really start catching on? The end of the regular season last year and it blew up in the playoffs. It continues to grow in popularity this year. Now lets look at how our power play performed during that time. Our power play has been damn near non-existent. We need to put an end to this right now, and that means when you are at your next game it is your responsibility to do whatever it takes to stop this dance from occurring. Also, if you know anything about anti voodoo dances get to work on fixing the damage already done.

Suspension tracker

Doc Whiskey — Wed, 11 Nov 2009 23:48:13 -0000

Suspension tracker

For those who cannot make the scrimmage this morning

Doc Whiskey — Sat, 11 Jul 2009 13:13:20 -0000

I got this in an email from the Blues:

Watch the Blue vs. Gold Scrimmage Live at stlouisblues.com

Can't attend the Blue vs. Gold Scrimmage at St. Louis Mills on Saturday?

Watch the game live on stlouisblues.com beginning at 11 a.m. on July 11.

Blues broadcasters John Kelly and Bernie Federko will provide play-by-play and analysis from the Ice Zone at St. Louis Mills.

T.J. Oshie joins first round selections Ian Cole (2007), Lars Eller (2007) and Alex Pietrangelo (2008) in the game. Other players participating include Jake Allen, Philip McRae, Aaron Palushaj, and Brett Sonne.

Top 11 Things overheard in Detroit war room on free agent day

Doc Whiskey — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 12:48:07 -0000

11. I am so sick of Little Caesar's

10. Hossa went where?! Well he is known for making good career decisions

9. But if we re-sign Chelios, we would save money on hotel and food expenses because of his AARP discount

8. We lost Conklin? Someone get me Hasek's number

7. I would run out and pick up snacks, but I forgot my flak jacket

6. Mr. Ilitch, satan is on line 1, something about a deal?

5. Someone tell Henrik to stop having his copy of Diving Scumbag Monthly delivered here

4. Before I call his agent I've gotta do my daily routine of kicking a baby and eating a live puppy

3. Before you offer him a contract think.....what would Hitler do?

2. Unplug the phones for the next half hour, Dora's on

1. Sure he has the potential to be a 30 goal scorer, but what will his attitude be at the glory hole?

Legends of Fuck Detroit

Doc Whiskey — Sat, 13 Jun 2009 12:56:24 -0000

The Legend: Maxime Talbot

The Scenario: Game 7 of the 2008-2009 Stanley Cup Finals

The Accomplishment: Outscoring Detroit to ensure they do not win the Stanley Cup

When the Wings won game 5 via shutout, most people thought the Pens were DOA. Crosby and Malkin were not doing much, and the Wings were a damn talented team. Pitt won game 6 not surprisingly since it was at home, but game 7 was in Detroit, and they were very good on home ice. Cue Maxime Talbot. His first goal, the direct result of a misplayed puck beat Osgood five hole to put Pitt up 1-0. The second was a thing of beauty. A laser beam that went top shelf over the "Hall of Fame*coughyeahrightcough*" bound Chris Osgood to put Pitt up 2-0. They would win the game 2-1.

The best part of this whole scenario is the story of Marianne (oh yes I did go there) Hossa. Last season he left the team that finished runner-up in the cup finals to play for the team that won the cup, his reasoning being he had a better chance to win a cup with Detroit than with Pittsburgh. Does this remind you of anyone? Like for example a front-running, band wagon jumping hockey fan (from let's say Detroit)? You literally had a guy leave a good team for the team that just won. If that isn't ironic for 3/4ths of all Detroit fans after 1996 I don't know what is. The best part is he was worthless in the finals, a fact that may have been overlooked if not for Maxime Talbot.

So I salute you Mr. Talbot, for not only ensuring the cup did not return to Detroit (other than for them to have it rubbed in their faces last night) but for also ensuring bandwagon fans and bandwagon players get their comeuppance.

Pit @ Wash GDT

Doc Whiskey — Wed, 13 May 2009 23:12:19 -0000

Fine I'll do it. If you have any casual fans you know, if you have any non-hockey fans you know...call them up, do everything you can to get them to watch this game. If these two teams play anything like they did in the first 6 games it will be something special to see. If that doesn't get fans into hockey I don't know what will (especially compared with a cards/pirates game). Predictions are welcome and will be mocked later