I have collected a number of pics I'd like to share. The are sox related. Mostly. I promise.

PR showed some sticker pride:

2012-05-26 13.59.05 (via Dremiliolizardo)

The motley crew, candid:

2012-05-26 15.00.59 (via Dremiliolizardo)

And posed:

2012-05-26 15.01.22 (via Dremiliolizardo)

I particularly enjoyed PR pegging the silverback gorilla-esque Rhu:

2012-05-26 15.01.33 (via Dremiliolizardo)

Our View from the seats:

2012-05-26 15.23.39 (via Dremiliolizardo)

Self portrait # 1:

2012-05-26 15.23.44 (via Dremiliolizardo)

Ken Wo Homage:

2012-05-26 16.38.27 (via Dremiliolizardo)

In the Jewel Parking Lot was this awesome car, with much beleaguered wife inside.

2012-05-05 17.52.35 (via Dremiliolizardo)

2012-05-05 17.52.56 (via Dremiliolizardo)

Yes, the bleak midwinter is nigh upon us, and the ellipses have come home... to roost. What is there to do... to pass the dull dreary days of dark demented dour doldrums, save contemplate faux marketing hilarity?

Come now ye bespectacled, ye downtrodden, ye yearning to wit free, and cast your lingual net wide, perhaps to snare the elusive greening, the entertainment of your friends, and the envy of all Dutchmen.

To get thy sloganeering juices flowing, I give you after the jump, a few off the cuff efforts of my own paltry hand. Upon their reading, you will certainly say- "I can fucking do better than THAT Lizardo"... which is of course... My... Entire... Plan.

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Girls- Swoon over Brad Pitt!

Guys- Drool over Robin Wright and Kathryn Morris!

Statnerds- Swoon over Jonah Hill!

Baseball Historians- Bitch about revisionist history from Steven Soderburgh!

Drama-types- simultaneously loathe/admire Phillip Seymour Hoffman!

So- I am proposing a suburban methup for Opening weekend (sept 23ish)... suggestions welcome - Poll below le jump!

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OK- So Mrs. Doc and I have a 17 year old foreign exchange student from Norway for the next 9 months. She is Filipino, which makes her a Norwippino.  I am compiling a list of places to go in the greater Chicagoland area that are cool destinations for visitors and locals.

Here is my list, after the jump- Please, fellow SSS'ers, feel free to suggest more, better and novel places. Some are cliche, some are tacky, some are cool- they are all Chicago, and I know there are many more, and I know you can help.

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Hey- Nice Wood!

So, the Mrs and I are taking our vacation to the Smokey Mountains and there were a number of things of SSS related interest.  So, while relaxing in a luxurious room at the Hippensteal Inn overlooking the setting sun in the great Smokey Mountains, I wanted to share some highlights and recommendations for Louisville KY, a surprisingly AWESOME baseball destination!   Read on, after Le Jump!

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So, I enjoy visiting the Failblog family of sites, especially Learn From My Fail as evidenced by some of my pics and GIFs.    I did a search for Baseball and found a few gems, and thought:  I bet we SSSoxers have a few doozies of our own to share.  I have a few of my own, after le jump...

When jumping a six foot high fence while chasing a baseball, make sure it is not a 20 foot high fence on the other side. #LFMF

 

When coaching a Little League baseball team and you want to get the kids amped with music, be thoughtful of your selections. "Let’s Get Retarded" by The Black Eyed Peas may seem harmless and fun, until you are reminded that the Challenger’s Division (handicapped children) is playing their tournament on the field directly behind yours. #LFMF

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We have been visited by a unclean spirit.  The evidence is all around us- Look, o ye disbelievers!

1- Only a cursed team would EVER have considered a uniform like this:

2- The Umpires conspire against us....

3- Juandog Pierror- should be a far better player than Scott Podsednik! 

(seen here in a previous life, but the the loafing on base after getting caught (AGAIN) should be familiar)

but if you had his start to the season wouldnt you look like this? And long for the palm trees and sunny shores of California?)

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Someone (too lazy to open a new window and look <ok, it was PR>) posted a link to Jeff Passan's Yahoo blog that contained the following Haiku

Important question:
Why do we even listen
To Oney Guillen?

What else is there to do in the cold dark season but dream of warm sunny days at the park?  So, to get y'all in the mood for Spring Training, occupy your creative medulla oblongata's and frontal lobes, I challenge you all to a Haiku Slam, SSS Style!  Winner (determined by the most reccomendations) will receive eternal poetic glory, the fame and adulations of millions, and an iconographic poster from white sox marketing.  Not sure what the hell is a haiku?  Read on after the jump...

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U-God posted a link in the RR about Boston Herald columnist Steve Buckley, and his recent article about coming out publicly as a gay man in the sports world. This also reminded me of a Real Sports episode I saw about Rugby player Gareth Thomas (pictured below- soon to be played by a dentally impared Mickey Rourke), the only openly gay athlete who is currently playing a major team sport. Because I perceive value in the following analysis and the ensuing discussion. 

(Go Ahead- say it to my face... I double dog dare you)

Titles I also considered:

Pitchers and Catchers Sound Off?

Queer Eye for the Baseball Guy?

A Faaabulous Look at Statistics? 

What else might Oney let slip?

So if you are mildly curious about an amateur statistical analysis of MLB player demographics from an actual scholar, and the realistic conclusions we can draw, read on after the glamorous jump...

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 So- the year in cinema, through the eyes of the good doctor.  I can only comment on films I have actually seen, so no Inception, Black Swan, The Social Network, etc....   These are just good films I can recommend a filmgoer see...

The Town: aka, the redemption of Ben Affleck. But the supporting cast included the fabulous Jeremy Renner, who I think should get an oscar nod.

Shutter Island: I have to recommend any film that you can argue with people on what the last scene means.

The Karate Kid: Jackie Chan can act! As a martial arts schoolowner, I love this film and what it has done for my business.  As a fan of acting skill, the young Jaden Smith is going to rule the cinema industry- his genes are overflowing with talent.

Salt: I dont mind cliche formulaic action films when they are done as well as this one...

Let Me In: Finally, a vampire film that is worth watching-  re-envisions what a vampire flick can be... and I hate vampire films..

and finally, True Grit: Long live the Coen brothers! Just saw this tonight, and is easily the best film of the year in my book.  Oscar worthy performances by nearly everyone on the screen, superb cinemtography, dialogue, costuming, and feel...

So- what is your best of the year that was 2010?

So- We have established that we are the smartest, funniest, most knowledgeable group of baseball fans on the interwebz. Yet, as human beings we also have emotions and passions, and that leads to conflicts and disputes.  How to resolve such things? 

Simple: Face Punching!

via cdn.cagepotato.com

However, that might get the overlords' voluminous knickers in a twist, so in an effort to make things more civil, I am going to share the story of the first time I was punched in the face, and invite all the rest of you to do the same.  Then, whenever someone is really honked off at me, all they need to do is read the TRUE STORY of my face punching, and satisfy that urge to hit me, abating actual violence. 

Ladies- while I am firmly opposed to domestic violence, I also know that y'all are capable of some might fine 'girl on girl' violence, so dont hold back with your stories as well!

via gallery.photo.net

So, read on after the jump, and post your own stories. I know I am eagerly awaiting to hearing from all of you!

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 Sea Change.

Paradigm Shift.

New World Order.

We communally are a freewheeling, freespirited and freethinking bunch.  Irreverent, disrespectful, ball busting, sardonic, ironic and sarcastic.  This is a major plus in my opinion.  From Kenwo's massive hubris trophy cabinet, HSA's verbose portslutiosity, larry's withering cold dry logic, and Rhubarb's abstract  stream of consciousness, we are a brilliant, talented, wide-ranging community united by our love of the White Sox, and the desire to entertain, edify,connect and share with each other.   I am proud to call myself a member. All in all, we represent the best of humanity- creative and imaginative, organic and diverse, alive and vibrant.  And simply the best WS blog on the planet.

At the same time, we all within us have the capacity to be the worst of our kind- Snarky, spiteful, mean, cruel and demeaning.   I am just as guilty of falling prey to the devil on my shoulder rather than the angel of my better nature.   (Kenwo, WU- I love you both.  Truly. Madly. Deeply.  With lube... I suppose a 3way is out of the question?)

So, with the new Regime rapidly goosesteping towards descending upon us, I for one do not want to lose what is best about our little corner of the interwebz, while allowing the dross (hatespeak, racism, rampant douchebaggery) to be purged away in the Refiner's fire.

So, I humbly submit for your discussion and debate, a SSS Bill of Rights (Thanks to OSFIB for planting the seed in my fevered brain).  If you agree with me, speak up- Let us join our voices in glorious communal shapenote SSS song... If you disagree you are welcome to eat a candybar out of my ass share your worthless dissenting opinion.  If we dont speak up for ourselves, we may quickly face someone else telling us what we may or may not speak.

So, Ladies and Gentleman, read on after Le Jumpe...

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 So, I have been wanting to attend the Holiday Event at US Cellular for several years, but finally bundled the wife and niece up for a combo christmas trip to the Celmisky and the Chrstkindle market at Daley Plaza this frosty Sunday.  With Christmas carols ringing in our heads, we braved the frozen tundra and headed towards Mecca:

To read about the exploits, bargains and observations of the Good Doctor, Frau and neice, deep under the mantled crust of US Cellular, read on after the Jump.

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And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof.

via lh3.ggpht.com

One of the most basic human instincts is to Label.  We are Nomothetes in our very DNA. We name the things we encounter, see, hear and witness. Be they beautiful or horrifying, if we experience it, we will name it.  Think I am talking out of my ass? 

Miracle on Ice.

9-11.

The Holocaust.

Be they horrible or wonderful, a few simple words sum up an aggregated event and strike a chord in all who know of it.

We here at SSS, the devout, the faithful, the devoted and exalted Sox Fans, have witnessed such an event this season upon the emerald green grass at US Cellular Field over the past 30 or so days.

From 3 games in the lead, with dreams of 93+ wins, to now eliminated and the promise of even .500 ball at risk

So- what the fuck do we call it?  

Some conversation starters after Le Jumpe.

via i357.photobucket.com

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FTALC, it is SSS Part Deux on Yahoooooo!

Yep, we got us a barn burner that will waste more pitchers than Joe West, jack more homers than Pujols, Dunn and Votto, and strike out more than Weaver, Hernandez and Lincecum.

And, they will play better than ever this bunch.

via www.polyvore.com

Here is the league snapshot:

The story so far, after Le Jumpe'

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So, I am about to head to Target Field to cheer our Beloved White Sox in person up here in MN.   I am calling on all the collected genius that is SSS to help me with some pointed jeers to shout at the Twins and their fans should the occasion call for it.  Examples after the Jump!     

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 So, work took me to the wilds of Minnesota last week, and having a free night, spend a few sheckels to go downtown to scope out the new park that is known as Target Field, where the home team was taking on the Detroit Tigers.

So, if you want to read an overly verbose review with far too many highfaluting adjectives and nouns... read on after the Jump.

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So, watching the olympic coverage these past weeks, I had a few ideas that perhaps MLB and the Major Networks could incorporate.   Read on after the Jump... Feel free to add your own modest proposals....

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With apologies for the delay- Had trouble finding my camera cable (damn propietary technology), and without pictures, this would be even more lame than it is already gonna be. 

So, if you want to read about an old, thick fellow meeting aged heros and finding new ones, laughing, crying and getting ripped with Mongo- yes, Steve McMichaels, at the 2010 Comcast Sports Awards, read on after the jump...

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So- I have pulled all the greened sloganeers, and put them in a poll- because I fear some of the latecomers didnt get full rec-props, I am putting them all out for a vote-  Poll to close the day pitchers and catchers report.  (I am too lazy to look it up right now) Props to all nominated, and thanks for a ton of laughs!   Sorry- photo slogans were not accepted as 'Slogans' - pillow-fights?  really?     The Inferno Quote, now that was cool.

Smart-ass comments to follow.

Inspired by several SSS'ers, I thought it would be a great diversion and a way to make light of the recent trauma (no, not the haitian earthquake) and get some cheap laughs.

So, come up with your own "White Sox Baseball: Insert Slogan Here" , post as many as you like, and recommend the ones that made you laugh so hard you fart,  spit your soy latte or PBR all over the screen, or fall down playing frisbee golf.  The winner gets an actual prize from me- Your very own White Sox Pennant (value, less than 5 dollars).

To get started and set the bar nice and low:

WSB- We Dont Need No Stinkin Designated Hitters!

WSB- Please Dont Lynch Us!

WSB- Managers Wanted

WSB- Wait- how do you play this game again?

WSB- Reinventing the wheel, badly.

As many people want, think and believe Jim Thome will be signed in the near future, lets make a game out of it.

The prize is bragging rights, to be awarded when the Sox make the announcement (or, god forbid, Spring Training starts without signing him) that the Thomer has been signed to a one year contract.   Pick The Date and the Hour of the press announcement and you win!

Rules: One guess per SSS member, only one person can pick any one hour- if you ride the coat-tails of someone who already picked your prediction, you will be mocked mercilessly, and larry will be your houseguest for a week.

My crystal ball says, January 25, at 1 pm.

Update.  

FOG.

Inspired by a Score version for the Bears, I thought I would take a stab at it, and invite you to do better, because you probably can.

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Dear SSS-

I got your letter, and have to admit, I was totally taken by surprise.  I mean, we had a lot of good times together, didnt we?  I mean, the World Series, for christsakes?  Doesn't that matter anything to you? 

Yeah, I read you loud and clear- I am too proud to try and beg, but I want to point out a few things you may not have considered, in all your collective Baseball Wisdom:

1- You called me, remember?  And what did I do for you, when you needed me? .304 BA, 2 errors...   TWO!  sure, I may have played some balls badly, but hey, who else were you going to get?  You want to have Ramirez as your leadoff hitter?  Puhleezee....   I have a 1.8 WAR, for crying out loud, while your precious Q had a -0.5 WAR.. You really think you are better off with him than me?

2- I told you I had figured the health thing out, and this season proved it: I know how to keep myself healthy,, and the beating I took on the basepaths is proof of that.   All those late and miss-timed slides would have broken a lesser man (Hows Quentin doing, btw?  You see JD throwing himself around like me?  I dont think so...)  I have gotten more gloves to the face than any other player in MLB (except Nick Punto, maybe), and it was all for you, SSS, all for you.

3- My wife... you wont have her to Ogle anymore, ok?  Keep your Damn eyes to yourself, Mister, and no more google image searches!!!

4- You want to get a Free Agent and replace me?  good freaking luck- Worked out well for Milton Bradley and the Cubs...  have fun with that process.  

5- I get on YOUR nerves?   Really?  of all the crap things about this club this year, I am the person you single out to spurn?  Really?  Do I have to actually say the names, Linebrink, Colon, Contreras, Dye, Quentin?  Hell, even Jenks let you down more than I did this year, and you say you are tired of me? Really.... well, you can take your precious savior and shove him up Jenks prodigious ass for all I care.

6- I'll go now... Back to Milwaukee where they dont crap all over their MVP.

Have a good 2010- Hope you choke on it.   And next year, dont come crying to me, telling me you made a mistake, you were wrong...  I am not even going to pick up the phone- I will just hit delete on the voicemail.

And, from now on, it is MR. Podsednik to you.

OCab gets a public shaming

Much deserved ripping by Dan Brown of Yahoo's Big League Stew.     Much like Lloyd Benson once said..."I knew Bo Jackson sir, and you are No Bo Jackson!"    To fill up the additional words required, I will share my favorite Bo moment- His going Back to Back to Back with Robin Ventura and Frank Thomas on an Easter Weekend homestand my wife and I attended.   Shortly thereafter she got her hip replaced, having needed it done since childhood, saying "If he can hit a homer with a fake hip, I oughta be able to do ok..."

Closing time
Open all the lockers and let Bobby out into the world
Closing time
Turn off all of the lights on over US Cellular Field
Closing time
Ozzie put in Linestink so finish your whiskey or beer
Closing time
You don't have to go home but you can't stay here

I know who I want to be the DH
I know who I want to start in Center
I know who I want to Play Right Field

Closing time
Time for Kenny Williams to work the Winter Meetings
Closing time
This season is ovaah, and sadly Pods was your MVP
So gather up your jackets, move it from the bullpen
I hope you have found a leadoff man...

Closing time
Every new Latin Starter comes from some other Latin Starter's release.

I know who I want to play in center
I know who I want to be the DH
I know who I want to take me home
Mrs Podsednik and Kotsay...