This is the most soul-crushing defeat I've ever faced. For three straight days, my heart's been broken. This is worse than the second-to-last game of 2004. It's almost as bad as that dream I had about the 2002 World Series not being cancelled.

It's at times like these that I ask, "Why?" Why am I emotionally entangled with the doings of 25 men I will never meet and have no connection to? This is especially pertinent, given that I have a lot of more important things (school), and I spent the evening in bed sick. Stress is the last thing I need.

Right now, I want to stop being a Giants fan more than anything, even more than for the Giants to win every game the rest of the way, including the playoffs. For we will meet disappointment eventually. Or, at the very least, I should like to be an idiot frontrunner who has no real attachment to any team. But this is out of my power.

Why? Because fandom is like life. Both can be pleasurable, but both are in the end suffering. nd if we understand this, we can end the suffering of fandom and reach enlightenment.

If only...

Remember me?

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A few days ago, I proposed a MCC Giants newsletter. It was somewhat well-recieved, so I'll go into a little more detail on it. I'm not really sure what the method of distribution would be or even the final layout, but here's what I'm looking at, in terms of features:

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Am I the only one out there who listens to the radio pregame show? I, personally, tune in every day, and enjoy the whole hour (except maybe the broken English of Felipe Alou, but that's gone now). I only discovered it last year. How long has it been out there?

Today, I got to thinking about how overrated the Yankees-Red Sox rivalry is. I usually try not to do that, since it usually results in my getting extremely worked up over almost nothing. Today though, I decided to blow off the steam wth this poll.