SBNation.com User Blog: F'n Clownshoes

How will history look at the mess that was/is/will be GSP/Diaz?

F'n Clownshoes — Wed, 27 Mar 2013 14:42:47 -0000

Cheaters! Frauds! Bitches! Please. Just stop for a moment.

How will we and the greater sporting world view this monumental clusterfuck that is GSP/Diaz? We see how we are viewing it now. As Maniacs and other site posters have erupted in the proverbial he said she said bullshit about the Montreal Athletic Commissions blunder, large mainstream media don't give a single solitary fuck about this. If this makes a ping on the radar of mainstream media i'd be shocked....for now. If it does make a ping on the radar could it change or damage the already tenuous view that is had about our beloved MMA. Shit, is this even our beloved MMA anymore?

Who's to blame? Nick is a whiny bitch. GSP is a pampered bitch. The commission are loophole creating lying bitches and Dana/Zuffa are being very quiet bitches.

Is Nick at fault? No, not really. He's dragging this out and whining whist doing so but perhaps this should be dragged out. No, Nicks to blame for a great many things but not this.

Is Gsp to blame? I doubt it. I actually can't blame a man who has not been proven to be overweight. Ever. I'll blame him for being boring, safe and autisticly predictable. I'll blame him for not being honest to the public about his style but not for this.

The Commission is definitely to blame here. Right? They can't just make fucking rules up as they go along can they? I would guess they could but that's not really the point. The way of communicating this to the Diaz party was at best fucking retarded. They should be getting the flack, the vitriol, the hate.

Wait. The Zuffa machine has been oddly absent in this. Dana hasn't said much if any about this subject. I have supported Dana and co. for a very long time but seriously, What The Fuck! Aren't zuffa officials around backstage and if not why the fuck not. This is stinking to high heaven and for some reason i feel like the Zuffa machine is deeply entrenched in this. Will time tell? Will we as fickle shortsighted fans let this drift away into a nothing situation that it clearly is not? I hope not. I hope somehow this ends up on E60 or 20/20 or Real Time/Talk(the HBO one, whatever the fuck it's called)

In the end do you think this will carry itself to the mainstream? What will the repercussions bring to our sport? I guess only time will tell. Do you care to speculate?

Cheaters! Frauds! Bitches! Please. Just stop for a moment.

Who's to blame? Nick is a whiny bitch. GSP is a pampered bitch. The commission are loophole creating lying bitches and Dana/Zuffa are being very quiet bitches.

Is Nick at fault? No, not really. He's dragging this out and whining whist doing so but perhaps this should be dragged out. No, Nicks to blame for a great many things but not this.

In the end do you think this will carry itself to the mainstream? What will the repercussions bring to our sport? I guess only time will tell. Do you care to speculate?

Jesus Christ is a cracker.....yum.

F'n Clownshoes — Mon, 01 Oct 2012 12:36:44 -0000

I hope you clicked here to yell at me for my stupid religious title. Sorry to disappoint you as this post has nothing to do w/ the deliciousness of your Lord and Savior.

What is it about you ask. (go ahead and ask that to yourself) Well, it's about us. The Maniacs. The posters the lurkers and Sarah. (Yes she is in her own category) We suck. Simple yet accurate. The hate on this site is creating a diseased state of affairs. I feel like I'm on a plague ship and the sick are looking at the last healthy few like we are a steak..... (Medium Rare)

I get the hate about the site change. I get the hate about the atrocities of the journalists on this site shitting the bed recently. Geno and Jesse, please write more and let these other fools write less or not at all.....ever. No really, not ever again.

I've tolerated the endless hate on JBJ because he seems like a douche. I've tolerated the hate on Hendo because we have two very distinct views on TRT and it's actually a good topic to argue/discuss. Now however, we are hating on everything. Rashad doesn't take a fight against the Glover. Hate. Condit doesn't defend his belt (which is stupid as it's not a championship and we all know this. It's a fucking #1 contendership.) Do I get to look forward to the Renon Barao hate, cause that dude is gonna wait too. We hate on the little fellas in particular the 125 dudes who have put together 1 bad fight since entering the UFC. Hate, hate, fucking hate!

I thought we were fans. This place is full of insanely knowledgeable fans who have become jaded, jilted, angry, annoying trolls.

This is a rant. It's pointless and for that I'm sorry. I just want a small tid bit of the MMAMANIA back. For fucks sake folks eat a cracker and let the love of flow through you.

I hope you clicked here to yell at me for my stupid religious title. Sorry to disappoint you as this post has nothing to do w/ the deliciousness of your Lord and Savior.

I thought we were fans. This place is full of insanely knowledgeable fans who have become jaded, jilted, angry, annoying trolls.

This is a rant. It's pointless and for that I'm sorry. I just want a small tid bit of the MMAMANIA back. For fucks sake folks eat a cracker and let the love of flow through you.

the Greatness of Uriah Bieber

F'n Clownshoes — Mon, 24 Sep 2012 18:10:55 -0000

I was wrong.....wow, that wasn't hard to say. Biebs, you have shown me the error of my ways and for that I can only thank you

Let me put this in context to all the folks who will read this post while scratching their heads. (or various other body parts.) Biebs posted a fan post the other day about JBJ sucking ass for not taking the fight w/ Chael and saving the card in the process. I disagreed w/ him for my own reasons that do not need to be harped on. During our tit for tat I posed a question about Champions taking a fight on that short of notice to defend their belt. I told him he could delve into the other pugilistic arts as well. These included but were not limited to the world of Boxing, Kickboxing and Muay Thai. It is also worth pointing out that I wrote I had neither the time nor the inclination to do the research because, well I'm fucking lazy.

I was wrong.....wow, that wasn't hard to say. Biebs, you have shown me the error of my ways and for that I can only thank you

Wouldn't you know it that little Pop Star, But Chinned boy went out and proved me the fuck wrong. He sited this; http://community.seattletimes.nwsource.com/archive/?date=19911123&slug=1318984. In which it was brought to my attention that none other than the "Real Deal" Evander Holyfield took on an always game "Smokin" Bert Cooper w/ less than a weeks notification of the change in opponent. (as an aside, the Pride also pointed out to me the Hughes/Riggs fight. I think that little fucker just wanted to salt the wound but I digress) He was right. I was wrong and because of this he will get to bask in the glory of his rightness and I must post this as a solidified reminder to all that one Uriah Bieber was a better man than me at that particular moment in time.

Simply stated and as promised. Uriah Bieber, you are great, the bees knees, a prince among men, a gentlemen, a scholar and for that i salute you. I have properly ate crow. Now you can say what you will but before you do know this, Fuck You.....that is all.

With all sincerity, F'n Clownshoes

Screen Name Origins (what's in a name)

F'n Clownshoes — Tue, 26 Jun 2012 21:50:52 -0000

So, recently someone commented to me about my screen name and asked if it referenced something from Big Brother. Later someone thought it came from Jay and Silent Bob Strikes Back, which in fairness would have been alright by me. Both assumptions were incorrect.

I'm going to explain the origin of my screen name with the hopes that some of you other fools will do the same. No shit. I'm seriously interested in this no matter how banal or silly it is.

I'll start with mine. It's rather simple really. I grew up in New Jersey and a friend of my brother used to use the phrase "fucking clownshoes" to describe any situation that he viewed as bullshit. One of his friends would say "she blew me last night" or something to that effect and he would respond by calling him and his story fucking clownshoes. I, being a 15 year old kid wishing to emulate my older sibling and his friends adopted it immediately. My friends and I shortened it to f'n clownshoes so we could get away with it in school. It stuck. When I joined this community about 20 years or so later I felt it apropos to use because after lurking for years I realized quite a number of the comments were deliberately bullshit and i'd say to myself, f'n clownshoes!

So boys and girl if you wanna explain your name, here is the forum to do so.

I'm going to explain the origin of my screen name with the hopes that some of you other fools will do the same. No shit. I'm seriously interested in this no matter how banal or silly it is.

So boys and girl if you wanna explain your name, here is the forum to do so.

does 11 fighters a division make?

F'n Clownshoes — Thu, 07 Jun 2012 20:17:24 -0000

OK, DJ and Uncle Creepy are about to throw down....again. (thank god) Joe Benavidez beat Urushitani. Soon we will have a division champion, well soonish. Besides these 4 fighters we currently have only 7 others on the roster. (i had to look that up) They are, in no particular order;

Louis Gaudinot (1-0 in the UFC flyweight division)

John Lineker (0-1 in the UFC flyweight division)

Josh Ferguson (0-0 in the UFC flyweight division)

John Dodson (1-0 in the UFC flyweight division)

Tim Elliott (0-1 in the UFC flyweight division)

Chris Cariaso (0-0 in the UFC flyweight division)

Darren Uyenoyama (0-0 in the UFC flyweight division)

Now I know some of these folks have fought in the UFC at 135. I also have been made aware that other fighters at 135 may be coming down. I do not know who those fighters are. I also do not know any other flyweights with the exception of Jussier da Silva.

Maniacs, I implore you, enlighten me on who may be coming down and what other fighters outside of the UFC will be coming in to make this a real division. I hate being ignorant and I enjoy the lighter weight classes but I just do not have the MMA knowledge about these guys,

Finally, do you consider this a real UFC division yet? What does it mean to be champion of an eleven person division?

Louis Gaudinot (1-0 in the UFC flyweight division)

John Lineker (0-1 in the UFC flyweight division)

Josh Ferguson (0-0 in the UFC flyweight division)

John Dodson (1-0 in the UFC flyweight division)

Tim Elliott (0-1 in the UFC flyweight division)

Chris Cariaso (0-0 in the UFC flyweight division)

Darren Uyenoyama (0-0 in the UFC flyweight division)

Finally, do you consider this a real UFC division yet? What does it mean to be champion of an eleven person division?

Ladies and Gentlemen! you are all cordially invited.

F'n Clownshoes — Tue, 17 Apr 2012 19:08:46 -0000

On the date of July 23rd 2012 in the year of Lord we humbly ask you to bear witness to the greatest union in the history of MMA. The Families of Ronda Rousey and Rousimar Palhares are delighted to announce and officially invite you (insert Maniac name here) to the wedding of the century. The Church service will commence at 13:00 AMT in Dores Do Indaia, Minas Gerais, Brazil. Reception to follow directly after service. Please all come and celebrate with us.........

25 years later a young man steps into the Octagon for the first time. He is highly perceived to be the greatest prospect in the history of the UFC. He is the first American born Olympic gold medalist in the history of Judo. He is an ADCC Absolute and 77kg Champion. He brings with him a perfect professional MMA record of 8-0. He is the current Jungle Fights Welterweight Champion. Ladies and gentlemen i present to you the future of MMA and quite possibly the craziest motherfucker in the history of mankind; Murilo Rousey-Palhares (what you didn't think Ronda was gonna give up her name now did you?)

The story goes that after little Murilo got straightened out by his parents (you know leg locked and arm-barred into a good little boy) he dedicated his life to the craft of combat. Today we have the privilege of see it live. ...... i hope we can all sit back and enjoy it.

Well Maniacs. What other MMA women and men should marry or breed in the next true generation of MMA royalty?

Judge Me (a non MMA related post)

F'n Clownshoes — Sun, 15 Apr 2012 22:12:18 -0000

OK. So I have decided to move my life forward and have been working on some artwork to try help w/ the progression. Before I move along to the next phase w/ this work I need some real critiquing. I figured who better to be honest w/ me than you brutal, forthright, nit-picky, arrogant lady and gents. Have at it. If you think that they suck tell me, If you think they suck and care to explain why, do so.

I hope I don't piss anyone off because i know that this is a non MMA related post but I figured if Mot can put those God Awful comics out i could show some artwork.

via fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net

I hope I don't piss anyone off because i know that this is a non MMA related post but I figured if Mot can put those God Awful comics out i could show some artwork.

via fbcdn-sphotos-a.akamaihd.net

I am officially a convert

F'n Clownshoes — Sat, 28 Jan 2012 11:21:07 -0000

I have waited a long time. I have questioned my feelings and sanity. I have asked for help from friends and family alike. I now know what I am and although every fiber of my being is screaming at me not to be........I am a fan of the Diaz brothers.

I should say this. I did not like anything about these two for a long, long time. I was a Diaz hater. I wore that badge proudly. I defended all of their opponents with blind ignorance and veiled admiration. I knew in my heart that KJ would once again beat Nick. I knew that Daley had too much power and BJ too much skill. I have swore to the heavens that Carlos will knock him out, and while i can't predict the outcome of this fight i know that it will be a war

When I watched Nate fight Gomi I denied it based on the fact that I knew Gomi was washed up and then he utterly dominated Cerrone and my arguement failed me and I knew.......I refused to accept it, but I knew. I chose to pretend that now I only like the way they fight. I told myself that even though I think they are dicks they are at least entertaining, but I knew. I denied it. I refused to comprehend it, but still, somewhere in the recesses of my mind where i rarely delve, I knew.

Then the UFC, with its editing genius. With its Machiavellian, string pulling persuasion aired the "PrimeTime" special. Perhaps I am now a Mark. Perhaps I have been duped by well edited pieces and Cesar Gracie's surprisingly poignant explanation of the inner workings of the Diaz boys. I no longer care. Nick is polarising. Nate even seemed to have a personality.

I am a fan of the Diaz boys. They are not dicks. In reality they are not much different than any other fighter on the UFC roster. The have egos when it comes to their in cage abilities. They love their camp and coaches and family. They just don't speak well to the media or you or me.

I have been converted. Recognising this has taken a long time. When I am watching the fight at 4AM in the morning on February the 5th I will be annoying that stupid bitch that lives below me by screaming at my TV watching what I assume will be one of the greatest fights imaginable, and I will be screaming for Nick Diaz and I am oddly comfortable with that.

"If you don't hate fighting then you can never love it. There is no love without hate" - Nick Diaz......shit's deep son, preach on homie

Can we stop calling Diaz's striking boxing?....Please?

F'n Clownshoes — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 13:09:21 -0000

Ok, this won't be a long post. I don't write very well as I am Dyslexic. With that in mind, please bare with me.

Nick Diaz is not a great boxer. In reality he's not a boxer at all. Can we a Mixed Martial Arts fans finally just get past this. Nick Diaz is phenomenal MMA striker. Brilliant even. He uses an unorthodox style that, to this date, only one other fighter has even attempted to emulate. That one other person just happens to be his brother Nate who looked eerily similar to Nick in his decimation of Gomi.

Nick throws punches with a technique that makes western style boxing coaches cringe, but who really cares. He doesn't have to worry about facing strictly western style boxers. I have no idea just how many of his body punches land palm forward rather than fist forward but it is a lot. Clearly i'm no boxing analyst, but that just doesn't seem like normal boxing technique. (for the love of God please correct me if i'm wrong)

Nick throws kicks. Selectively but with specific intent. He actually has great kicks in that he uses them at the right moment to throw off his opponents timing. Boxers don't kick, right?

Nick has awful head movement which allows him to get hit a lot more than any boxer worth his salt with the exception of Micky Ward. If he did have a lot of head movement, with his style, wouldn't he be susceptible to take downs? His TDD is already porous. Improving but porous nonetheless.

Clearly this man is not striking as a boxer. Technique, no. Stance, nope. Movement, not so much.

I write this to simply ask, as kindly as I can. Please, let us all stop calling what Nick Diaz does as boxing. It is so much more than that. Is it way to much to ask to call it what it is. Beautifully Ugly MMA striking at its finest.

Ok, this won't be a long post. I don't write very well as I am Dyslexic. With that in mind, please bare with me.

Nick throws kicks. Selectively but with specific intent. He actually has great kicks in that he uses them at the right moment to throw off his opponents timing. Boxers don't kick, right?

Clearly this man is not striking as a boxer. Technique, no. Stance, nope. Movement, not so much.

Will the Fox/UFC deal bring forth a bigger deal w/ the US/State Government?

F'n Clownshoes — Thu, 18 Aug 2011 16:58:59 -0000

This is just simply a question I am curious about. Does New York and the rest of the states that have not sanctioned MMA change their tune due to national network TV coverage? Does this deal matter at all as it pertains to state sanctioning bodies? Please chime in.

I understand this isn't really a fan post but I have been off the grid for about a week or so and came home to this whopper of an announcement. If this question has been proposed before I apologise, I haven't read all the articles yet.

comments, concerns, confusions, professional and personal points of views and preferences are highly encouraged.