Fake Ken Tremendous

  • joined Jan 18, 2012
  • last login Dec 27, 2013
  • posts 47
  • comments 8
User Blog

Mad Dog panics over end to Bellmont gravy train

AUSTIN, TEXAS -- Sources within the University of Texas Athletic Department are reporting that Assistant Athletics Director for Strength & Conditioning Jeff "Mad Dog" Madden is in a state of...

Keys to a Texas Victory over Kansas

On Saturday, the Longhorns will face the Kansas Jayhawks -- a team that last year came within one play of giving Mack Brown the most humiliating loss of his career. What are the keys to a Texas...

Mack Brown plans to fix Longhorns' soft reputation

"I'm calling up people who think we are soft and begging them to change their minds," says Brown.

Mack apologizes for 66-17 loss to OU next month

"I want to apologize to all Texas fans, in advance."

Is now a good time to talk bonuses? By Mack Brown

Deloss? Knock-knock. Hey there. Sorry to bother you. I was just on my way to tape this week's "Game Plan with Mack Brown," and thought I'd pop in and see if you've given any thought to this year's staff bonuses. Is now a good time to talk?

After you R.I.S.E., you have to S.T.A.N.D.

Editor's Note: We recently received this unsolicited Texas State of the Union post in an e-mail from an anonymous address. It was signed "Publius Longwindicus." Although we can't be certain, we...

Don't Blame Me!

by Brian Davis, Associate Athletics Director for Academic Services Whew! That was a close one. You’ve surely heard by now that Desmond Harrison, a promising junior college offensive lineman, c...

Mississippi State's Slap on the Wrist

The NCAA recently announced that Mississippi State University will lose two scholarships and be placed on a meaningless two-year probation as punishment for payments made to recruits in...

Motivated Mack is Back!

It's spring time. The days grow longer, flowers bloom, and Texas fans celebrate the annual rebirth of their coach and savior, Mack Browntexasfootball. Rejoice, Longhorns! Motivated Mack is back. ...

CBI Brackets

Have You Filled Out Your CBI Bracket Yet? Oh, that's right. One doesn't exist. So we made our own.

Insider Tips for SXSW

It's early March in Austin, Texas. While University of Texas students are busy spring breaking, the annual SXSW festival has taken over the city. Attendees from all over the world will spend the...

Mack Responds to the New Recruiting Rules

The NCAA recently announced proposed revisions to its recruiting rules that would significantly reduce or eliminate limitations on the size of a school's recruiting staff, the frequency of contact...

Finishing What Deadspin Started: A Te'o Timeline'o

All content herein has been triple fact-checked by our editorial staff, who just returned from South Bend, California, and Hawaii with answers. Can an Oprah interview be far away?

WVU's Mountaineer Done Killed Hisself a Bear

A video recently surfaced showing the West Virginia University mascot stalking and killing a black bear with the Mountaineer's signature musket. This is not the first time a college mascot has been involved in controversial acts of violence.

I dreamed it in my head

Mack Brown and dream study.

Texas Defeats a Kansas State University, 21-17

Big win silences Coach Brown's critics.

Another feather in Mack Brown's Cap

Everyone's a winner! Longhorns Celebrate Second-Place Finish in 2012 Red River Shootout with a raucous party at Chuck E. Cheese.

Bill Little R.I.S.E.s to the Occasion

Football is around the corner which means Bill's here to write about it. I think. Honestly, I can’t figure out what in the hell he wrote about this week, but I think it's some combination of...

Those Mettling Kids!

This week, Bill minds his p's and q's, dots every i, and crosses every d. Bill Little commentary: The meddle of the metal - Ricky gets a statue Meddle? Well this is off to a good start! Why...

After Byrne?

Here it is, folks. The last Bill Byrne Wednesday Weekly you will ever care to read. Indulge yourself with one final luxurious bath of soul-soothing Aggie misery. Wednesday Weekly: Volleyball...

Squeeze Army

Wednesday Weekly. I'm really going to miss caring about these after this season. This week, Bill offers an interesting proposal to reverse the Ags' second-half woes. I want to start a new kind of...

A Little Show Tune For You

Bill Little commentary: The air of confidence In the end, the success of the Texas Longhorns will be determined by their belief in themselves. Sept. 4, 2011 Bill Little, Texas Media Relations A...

Bill Byrne's Monday Schedule

9:00 - File for divorce. 9:30 - Acquire Scarlett Johannson's telephone number. 9:45 - Call Scarlett Johansson, introduce myself, and agree to marry her. 10:00 - Snack. 10:15 - Inform ESPN of...

Bob Stoops Blames Dungeons Dragons Loss on Fictional Character

Norman, Oklahoma - University of Oklahoma head football coach Bob Stoops has drawn criticism for his behavior at a recent Dungeons & Dragons tournament. After failing to advance past the...

Clearing Up Misconceptions

In case you haven't heard, FanTake was recently purchased by the widely-respected national sports media empire, SB Nation. Now that our little blogging community has hit the national stage, we're...

The BC Mailbag

Believe it or not, we receive a lot of mail here at Barking Carnival headquarters (BCHQ). So much, in fact, that we maintain a growing staff of unpaid interns - you'd recognize them by their khaki...

Welcome to the Little Confusionarium

Good morning, students. The topic of today's lecture is "confusion." It has oft been said that to truly understand a subject, one should begin by studying the work of masters. With that in mind,...

A Little Effort

This week, Bill gives us his take on what’s ailing our beloved Longhorns. As it turns out, they’re putting forth too much effort. Bill Little commentary: Just do it Every Longhorn player...

A Message from Jamie Pollard

Hello, fellow Cyclones. The Athletic Department would like to share some exciting news with ISU alums, fans and well-wishers - the adoption of a new Cyclone logo! While the old logo has served us...

Longhorns Prevail in Contest of Gentlemanly Good Manners, 20-28

On Saturday, the Texas Longhorns prevailed over the Oklahoma Sooners in the annual contest of gentlemanly good manners between the two rival squadrons. Through four quartiles of footed ball, the...

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