SB Nation User Blog: HIV 2 Elway

Spiderman MJ Memorial???

HIV 2 Elway — Fri, 26 Jun 2009 19:30:19 -0000

Spiderman MJ Memorial???

I Towelie's voice..."I don't even know whats going on."

Any Freaks Going to Opening Day?

HIV 2 Elway — Thu, 09 Apr 2009 15:21:54 -0000

I know, I know, it’s a football blog, baseball is boring, they play too many games, steroids and the Yankees are ruining the game, blah blah blah. Forget that, most of us are fans of all Kansas City teams. That said…

Any other Arrowhead Pride freaks going to be out at the K tomorrow? If so there are beers to drink, blunts to smoke, and sluts to pound. Your humble narrator will be out there around noon and drunk by 2. If any of you want to meet up, get in touch, either through the comments or drop a line at youreabumherm@gmail.com

Congratulations mooseface79!

HIV 2 Elway — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 18:43:48 -0000

Everyone please join me in a big round of applause for the 2009 AP NCAA tournament pool winner mooseface79. Mooseface put us all to shame by correctly picking 46 of 63 games (73% accuracy). Old Moose correctly picked all 4 Final Four teams, 6 of the Elite Eight, and 10 of the Sweet Sixteen. To top it off, Moose had cock washing Roy cutting down the nets. What does such an incredible game picking prowess win Moose? A victory lap. Take it away Moose…

AP NCAA Tourney Pool

HIV 2 Elway — Sat, 14 Mar 2009 16:12:46 -0000

Ok Sports Fans, brackets are out. Arizona keeps the streak alive for the 25th year, BEAR DOWN! Lets get in on the action. An Arrowhead Pride pool has been set up through Yahoo. All you meat gazers need to sign up and fill out a bracket. Make sure you use your AP user handle as your bracket name so we can tell who's who, and while we're at who's your hoops squad?

Or use the following:

Group ID#: 72238
Password: cassel

Clark Hunt Conference Call

HIV 2 Elway — Wed, 25 Feb 2009 18:27:26 -0000

I probably shouldn't be telling all you mad dogs about this since its intended for REAL Kansas City Chiefs fans like myself, but there is a conference call with Clark Hunt tonight. He is going to be explaining what he has planned and fielding questions from season ticket holders.

The call is from 5-6pm. If you want to listen in the number is - 1-877-269-7289. The pin number is - 13692.

I'll be stuck in my soul sucking contracts course tonight so I'll need some of you meat gazers to take notes for the rest of us.

Chiefs Haiku

HIV 2 Elway — Fri, 13 Feb 2009 16:41:09 -0000

Alright sportsfans, we've had tons of posts about who the Cheifs should or shoudn't draft. It's Friday and many of us are counting down the hours, or in my case ripping the spiders out from under my skin, until we punsh the shit out of our livers. Lets spice it up and see how creative you knobs can be with some KC haikus.

I'll kick it off...

Night can’t get any worse

Trendy KC bars are lame

LJ spits on you

End of an era

Hy-Vee, big baller in town

So long Chiefs and Chopper

Hi may I help you?

Short end and frys to stay, please

God bless Ollie Gates

Rey Rey or Curry

Linebacker or O-lineman

Just don’t draft Stafford

When will this day end?

Heavy sweating, shaky hands

I’d kill for a drink

The Case For Willie Tuitama

HIV 2 Elway — Mon, 22 Dec 2008 18:28:15 -0000

Everybody wants a QB. I'm of the belief that its not the QB position that is holding this team back, rather its the O-line, D-line, and LB's. Well, and the lack of a competent head coach.

Still, we'll need to bring in one and probably two QB's next year either through the draft or free agency. Much of the talk will be centered around Bradford (meh) and Stafford (gag). I think the Chiefs need to look elswhere to address their QB needs, specifically, they need to look at Willie Tutiama.

Looking at the basics...

Bradford - 6'4" 218 lbs and a 2 year starter. In 2008 he tossed 48 TD’s to 6 INT’s and had a completion percentage of 68.3%.

Stafford - 6'3" 237 lbs and a 3 year starter. 22 TD’s to 9 INT’s with a completion percentage of 61.1% in 2008.

Tuitama - 6'3" 220 lbs and a 4 year starter. Finished 2008 with 23 TD’s to 8 INT’s with a completion percentage of 64.9%.

Equally important, is the fact that Willie has gone through a rebuilding process. When Tuitama took over the reigns, Arizona was outright horrible. Over his 4 years he helped the team mature into the Las Vegas Bowl winning powerhouse it currently is.

Most enticing, is the pick it would take to get him. He's easily a 5th or 6th rounder. Address our real needs on day one, get a proven QB on day two.

I'm all for giving Thiggy another year at this and would like to see that happen without the added pressure of having a high round pick waiting in the shadows. Tuitama has spent 4 years under center in the demanding Pac-10, he wouldn't cost us a high draft pick, he has a similar build to this years top prospects, and he has proven that he can help rebuild shitty teams. He's worth a long look come April.

Possible 1st Round Trade Partners

HIV 2 Elway — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 15:03:04 -0000

I will be saying this ad nausea this off season but I do not want to draft a QB with out top 3 pick. I’m sure there is some talent worthy of a top 3 pick available. Still, I’d like to see our boys move that pick, save some cheddar, and pick up an additional day 1 pick. Everyone is so damn high on Bradford and Stafford, so lets take a look at the squads that may be looking to move up to take one of them.

Philly-

Slim to none. McNabb’s not getting any older, but I don’t see this team trading two first day picks to take a QB.

Washington- Less slim to none. Sure Jason Campell is still young but is anyone impressed with him. Slight possibility if only because Dan Snyder is constantly trying to out shitty move Al Davis.

J-E-T-S JETS JETS JETS-

May be on to something here. Favre is old and senile. May be a perfect situation to draft a QB and have him spend a year, or two, or three. Hell, he’s not going anywhere, someone is going to need to play LT and put a Theisman like hit on him to get him off the field. Plus the last time a young QB was drafted to eventually replace Favre, the transition was seamless.

Seaturds-

Yeah they need a QB but they are going to be picking right below us. We may not get much in return from them to drop just a few spots.

49ers-

You believe in Shaun Hill? Me neither. I don’t know this team well so I don’t know what they really need but, dropping to where they should be picking, 9-15ish, would be nice.

Bears-

BINGO. Good defense, good o-line, finally a good running back. Grossman has been good but not great and this could be a good opportunity to upgrade. Plus they may be interested in taking Crabtree. Bears may be picking a little low but I’d still pull the trigger on this one.

Vikings-

SHAZAM. See Bears right up, change Tavaris/Frerotte for Grossman.

Cincinasty-

Is everyone giving up on Palmer? Is he the rich man’s Brodie? This team has more problems than QB, plus they’ll be picking right behind us so I don’t see it happening.

Panthers-

Another good possibility. I am still shocked that Delhomme (pronounced Day-la-hommie) is an NFL QB. Same sort of surprise I felt when Oakland actually signed Sweeney a few years ago. Plus this team is good so the QB wouldn’t need to come in and be a hero from the get go.

Buccaneers-

JACKPOT. This could be the best fit. Gruden loves him some QB’s. Jeff Garcia keeps pulling overachieving seasons out of his ass but how much longer can one expect that to happen? Strong possibility here, especially if Gruden falls for one of them.

I think the Buccs, Panthers, Vikings, and Bears are the most eligible trade partners. If I was the new GM I’d start sweet talking these teams as soon as the season ends. Thoughts?

The rebirth...

HIV 2 Elway — Mon, 22 Dec 2008 18:15:25 -0000

Not shortly after having the ban hammer dropped on me, I received an email from Chris. He was extending me an olive branch and laid out the terms of my suspension. We're both reasonable dudes, I agreed to check some unsavory language at the door, and we hugged it out.

Mocking the slain aint cool. I apologize for making tasteless jokes. Further, I apologize for breaking all 3 of the rules of blog commenting:

1. Be funny

2. Don't be unfunny

3. Don't be a dick

Damn, three birds with one stone. This wasn't the first time I have had my blog commenting privileges suspended and unfortunately, it probably won't be the last. So to those who think I'm an insufferable, unforgivable asshole, well you're not alone. To the rest of you, I’m here to drop a few wise cracks and see to it that Herm gets run out of our fine city.

Sayonara, Herm!

HIV 2 Elway — Tue, 16 Dec 2008 14:35:06 -0000

Adios! Chio! Auf Wiedersehen!

Its been a great run, Herm. So sad to see you go. You'll be leaving awfully tough shoes to fill. Not anyone can blow all 3 timeouts with a two score lead in the fourth quarter. No, it takes an incredibly inept man to pull that off. Its going to be tough to find someone to roam the sidelines who can dole out as many blank and empty stares. And where on Earth will we find a coach so willing to pass blame and responsibility on to others. Man, Herm, the buck never stopped with you.

Yeah, it’s going to be tough to replace you, but we'll get by. Hell, maybe you'll come back to town every so often; we'll run into each other, it will be awkward. You'll ask rhetorical questions, we'll stumble across some answers trying to appease you. We'll try to give you our full attention, I promise, but we won't. It will be hard to give you the attention you deserve what with all the, you know, the winning.

See ya!