SBNation.com User Blog: Jeff Jones

Antler spray? "What in the wide world o' sports is goin' on here?"

Jeff Jones — Wed, 30 Jan 2013 02:15:02 -0000

www.wearysloth.com

Report: Tide players took banned antler spray before '12 title game

[O]n the eve of facing LSU in the biggest game of their careers, a clutch of Alabama players huddled around Key, an aggressive pitchman who once was arrested for trespassing after giving chips and the beam-ray treatment to an LSU player in his hotel room at the 2010 Senior Bowl. (The charges were dropped, but he was banned from the hotel for life.) Neither Key nor S.W.A.T.S.'s owner, Mitch Ross, an erstwhile male stripper and admitted former steroid dealer, has a college degree in science. No matter. Unbeknownst to Crimson Tide coaches, S.W.A.T.S. had an audience with players on the No. 2 team in college football, a gathering that Key taped with a pen camera and showed to SI. He handed out some of the company's products gratis -- "It should never come up, but I'll go to the grave saying you bought this," Key told them -- and one, linebacker Alex Watkins, six months later gave a video testimonial on YouTube citing the boost he got from the chips, water and deer-antler pills during Bama's 21-0 BCS title victory.

Fallout expected to be next to nothing, with the caveat that -- you never know with the NCAA.

www.wearysloth.com

Report: Tide players took banned antler spray before '12 title game

[O]n the eve of facing LSU in the biggest game of their careers, a clutch of Alabama players huddled around Key, an aggressive pitchman who once was arrested for trespassing after giving chips and the beam-ray treatment to an LSU player in his hotel room at the 2010 Senior Bowl. (The charges were dropped, but he was banned from the hotel for life.) Neither Key nor S.W.A.T.S.'s owner, Mitch Ross, an erstwhile male stripper and admitted former steroid dealer, has a college degree in science. No matter. Unbeknownst to Crimson Tide coaches, S.W.A.T.S. had an audience with players on the No. 2 team in college football, a gathering that Key taped with a pen camera and showed to SI. He handed out some of the company's products gratis -- "It should never come up, but I'll go to the grave saying you bought this," Key told them -- and one, linebacker Alex Watkins, six months later gave a video testimonial on YouTube citing the boost he got from the chips, water and deer-antler pills during Bama's 21-0 BCS title victory.

Fallout expected to be next to nothing, with the caveat that -- you never know with the NCAA.

Back To Life-Back To Reality Random 10

Jeff Jones — Fri, 12 Oct 2012 12:43:47 -0000

Bye week finally almost over, and Soul II Soul showed up on top of my 10 today. And apparently there was some debate thing with politicians on my TV last night, which always reminds me of Les Nessman:

Les: The secret is to appear to answer all the questions, when in truth it's all mumbo-jumbo. Here, let me show you. Herb, ask me this question.

[Les hands Herb a card with a question written on it]

Herb: Surely. "Mr. Candidate, what is your energy program?"

Les: "Right now, I'm devoting a great deal of time and study to that problem. And I intend to issue a position paper on that. A position that is at once simple, yet complex, flexible, and above all else, fair to every American..."

1 Back To Life - Soul II Soul
2 Six O'Clock in the Morning - The Five Royales
3 Get Higher (acoustic) - Paper Tongues
4 Jailbreak - Thin Lizzy
5 Oi! Oi! Oi! - Cockney Rejects
6 Heartbreaker (live at BBC) - Led Zeppelin
7 Someday Never Comes - Creedence Clearwater Revival
8 In the Falling Dark - Bruce Cockburn
9 Love Gun - KISS
10 Don't Let A Thief Steal Into Your Heart - Richard Thompson

BONUS: (What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace Love & Understanding - Elvis Costello

Les: The secret is to appear to answer all the questions, when in truth it's all mumbo-jumbo. Here, let me show you. Herb, ask me this question.

[Les hands Herb a card with a question written on it]

Herb: Surely. "Mr. Candidate, what is your energy program?"

BONUS: (What's So Funny 'Bout) Peace Love & Understanding - Elvis Costello

RBR "Inside the Moral Kiosk" Random 10

Jeff Jones — Fri, 02 Mar 2012 13:20:40 -0000

Dunno why, seemed appropriate in this election year to crank up the random REM gibberish(?) lyrics. I vividly recall 10,000 Maniacs and REM at Foster Auditorium, Sept. '84, one of the sweatiest shows ever. Rock on with yer mumblin' self...

1 Always Love - Nada Surf
2 Daddy Sang Bass - Johnny Cash
3 A Night in Tunisia - Art Blakey & the Jazz Messengers
4 Sad Memory - Buffalo Springfield
5 Moral Kiosk - REM
6 Superstar - Sonic Youth
7 I Know What I Want - Cheap Trick
8 Foxy Lady - Jimi Hendrix
9 Heaven - Sonic’s Rendezvous Band
10 The Hunter - Free

BONUS PAIR:

Face to the Floor - Chevelle
I Found That Essence Rare - Gang of Four

BONUS PAIR:

Face to the Floor - Chevelle
I Found That Essence Rare - Gang of Four

RBR "Give up ____ for Lent?!?" Random 10

Jeff Jones — Fri, 24 Feb 2012 15:57:49 -0000

Give up _________ ? 40 days? How 'bout... no Nickelback? No, that's an every day thing, unless it's a football-season offering...

Rock on while you observe Lent or not in your fashion:

1 In My Room - Beach Boys

2 Silent Lucidity - Queensryche

3 In Memory of Elizabeth Reed - Allman Brothers

4 Planet Caravan - Black Sabbath

5 Ain't No Tellin' - The Original Sins

6 Anarchy in the UK - Sex Pistols

7 Unchain My Heart - Ray Charles

8 Too Far Gone - Feelies

9 Tommy Gun - The Clash

10 I Fought the Law - Bobby Fuller Four

BONUS: A is for Arthur - Young Agent Jones