SB Nation User Blog: Joel

Ghosts and robots: today's Tennessee talking points

Joel — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 11:07:08 -0000

Why is David Leaverton telling ghost stories to Chad Cunningham? Look, I love Leaverton, but let's save those stories for after the season, mmkay?
Ghost of Neyland gets all nostalgic and stuff about the National Championship season.
Bruins Nation discusses the Vols' offense and the Bruins' defense.
Gate 21's lawvol went and yoked hisself to View from the Hill's Patrick, who's now going by the name Home Sweet Home.
No link, but I've heard that we should have an answer on Gerald (Still No News) Williams' eligibility sometime today. Yeah, he's wearing Brandon Warren's old jersey. Hopefully, it will be good luck and then we can retire the thing.
Freaky, myopic robot. And football:

An in-depth look at the UCLA Bruins

Joel — Fri, 29 Aug 2008 10:47:47 -0000

A quick look at UCLA for the sake of comparison to the same sort of look at Tennessee. Caveat emptor: stats are from last year. Depth chart is from the Game Notes, which of course is subject to UCLA's misfortune of losing QBs like Spinal Tap loses drummers.

Schedules

2007			2008
9/1	at	W 45-17	9/1	No. 18	L
9/8		W 27-17		Bye
9/15	at	L 44-6	9/13	at No. 16	L
9/22		W 44-31	9/20		?
9/29	at	W 40-14	9/27		?
10/6		L 20-6	10/4		W
10/13	Bye		10/11	at No. 21	L
10/20	No. 12	W 30-21	10/18		W
10/27	at	W 27-24	10/25	at	L
11/3	at	L 34-27	11/1	Bye
11/10	No. 9	L 24-20	11/8		?
11/17	Bye		11/15	at	L
11/24	No. 9	W 16-0	11/22	Bye
12/1	No. 8	L 24-7	11/28	at No. 15	L
12/22	No. 17	W 17-16	12/6	No. 3	L

Last year, UCLA went 8-5 with two bad losses and two good wins. This year, with a new offensive coaching staff and giving them the benefit of the doubt in what Bruins Nations earlier this summer termed toss-ups, my best guess is that the Bruins go 5-7 in the regular season.

Depth Chart (games/starts)

UCLA FOOTBALL DEPTH BY CLASS
TOTALS FOR PROJECTED STARTERS
Unit	Seniors	Juniors	Sophomores	Freshmen
OFFENSE	4	4	2	1
DEFENSE	5	4	1	1
SPECIAL	1	2	1	0
OFFENSE
Position	Seniors	Juniors	Sophomores	Freshmen
QB		Kevin Craft Osaar Rasshan		Chris Forcier Kevin Prince Nick Crissman
TB	Kahlil Bell	Chane Moline		Raymond Carter Aundre Dean
FB		Trevor Theriot	Tobi Umodu	Tyler Tuiasosopo
WR	Marcus Everett	Terrence Austin	Dominique Johnson	Taylor Embree Nelson Rosario Ryan Graves Antwon Moutra Jerry Johnson
TE	Logan Paulsen	Ryan Moya Adam Heater	Jeff Miller
LT		Micah Kia	Brandon Bennett	Brett Downey
LG		Nick Ekbatani Jess Ward	Darius Savage
C	Micah Reed		Jake Dean
RG	Scott Glicksberg		Sonny Tevaga	Austin Hill
RT				Nate Chandler Mike Harris
DEFENSE
Position	Seniors	Juniors	Sophomores	Freshmen
LE	Tom Blake		Reginald Stokes	Justin Edison
LT	Nathaniel Skaggs	Jerzy Siewierski	Brian Price
RT	Brigham Harwell Chase Moline		Andy Keane
RE		Korey Bosworth	David Carter	Datone Jones
SLB	John Hale	Chinonso Anyanwu		Akeem Ayers
MLB		Reggie Carter		Steve Sloan
WLB	Kyle Bosworth Joshua Edwards		Mike Schmitt	Sean Westgate
LCB	Michael Norris			Aaron Hester Andrew Abbott
RCB		Alterraun Verner		Courtney Viney Andrew Abbott
FS		Aaron Ware	Garrett Rubio	Glenn Love
SS				Rahim Moore Tony Dye E.J. Woods
SPECIAL TEAMS
Position	Seniors	Juniors	Sophomores	Freshmen
PR	Ryan Graves	Terrence Austin
KR		Terrence Austin		Raymond Carter
P	Aaron Perez		Danny Reese
PK			Kai Forbath	Jeff Locke
Projected starters in bold. Returning starts in italics. Numbers in parentheses are games/starts. Redshirt "X" is denoted simply as "X."

Key stats from last year

SOS	PED	RD	3DO	TD	PEO	OPPG	TO	3DD
16	32	14	104	29	115	92	99	3
SOS	PED	RD	3DO	TD	PEO	OPPG	TO	3DD
12	66	69	56	70	29	29	54	72

SOS (strength of schedule), PED (pass efficiency defense), RD (rush defense), 3DO (3rd down offense), TD (total defense), PEO (pass efficiency offense), OPPG (opponents' points per game), TO (total offense), 3DD (3rd down defense)

Observations

Tennessee has two more upperclassmen on offense.
UCLA's defense last year was very respectable in all of the right categories. It appears that eight (five, according to the Game Notes) of their 11 on defense were starters last year, too, so expect them to be good when we have the ball.
The Bruins' 2007 offense, though, was atrocious. Seven starters are back (four, according to the Game Notes), but the QB isn't one of them. He' fresh off a stint at Mt. San Antonio College after having spent two seasons at San Diego State.

RTT's foolish predictions on the In The Bleachers Podcast

Joel — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 13:24:43 -0000

I and several other bloggers were on the In The Bleachers podcast last night to make laughable predictions about the upcoming season. Other guests were Justin Hokanson from the Bleacher Report and Gridiron Guru, Sean Keeley from Troy Nunes Is An Absolute Magician, Jon Johnston from Corn Nation, Michael Felder Jr from Bleacher Report, Peter Bean from Burnt Orange Nation & EDSBS Live, John Radcliff from Mountainlair, Spencer Hall from EDSBS, EDSBS Live, and the Sporting News, Big Head from MIZZOURAH, and Adam Nettina from College Football News and ITB.

Head over to In The Bleachers for instructions on how to download and listen to the thing.

Kickoff 2008 (via Nastinchka) via EDSBS.com.

Joel — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 13:20:26 -0000

Kickoff 2008 (via Nastinchka) via EDSBS.com.

Monday Night’s Chess Match: More Notes On the Vols' Offense - Bruins Nation

Joel — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 12:57:09 -0000

Monday Night’s Chess Match: More Notes On the Vols' Offense - Bruins Nation

Next question from the next idiot, please

Joel — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 11:05:50 -0000

Florida's Percy Harvin will reportedly sit out the first two or three games. Harvin had surgery to repair one of his heels back in April and has missed almost the entire preseason, and it's making coach Urban Meyer even testier than usual. "Is there concern? Yes. With the people that know what they're talking about? No," said Meyer when asked about the results of the surgery over teleconference Wednesday. Translation: Next question from the next idiot, please. Actually, strike the please. Anyway, that "or three" above is important, as it's the Tennessee-Florida game. Florida's got plenty of speed behind Harvin, but nobody with his combination of speed and experience.
Speaking of experience . . . does it really matter? At all? Via Bruce Feldman, the blog Blatant Homerism has chewed up the numbers and determined that it matters a grand total of .01 percent. For us non-mathy types, he means "not a lick."
Is Ohio State overrated? Not this time, says Dr. Saturday, who is taking prodigiousness to a whole new level. Slow down already, Matt. The season's just beginning.
Oh, and this. Dawg Sports' Kyle on Roll Bama Roll's podcast, talking about Georgia:
Don't forget about the Rocky Top Talk Pick 'Em Games. For a couple of weeks, we'll be running them from both Fun Office Pools and ESPN, so get your picks in pronto-like.
Also, don't forget to vote for the winner of this week's Hail Mary Haiku.

Vote for the Winner of the UCLA Bruins Hail Mary Haiku

Joel — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 02:27:18 -0000

Lots of good entries to kick off the season, including a couple of good ones from friendly trolls. Vote for the winner below.

Pretty Neuheisel,
promises a resurgence,
but has no horses.

by rustytanton

Crompton throws it long,
No wait ,he still has the ball,
Runs it in to win!

by USMC_VOL

Rogan Fields the ball
No blues for Dennis this time
Makes it past punter

by InBruceWeTrust

Rocky Top is back!
California dreams take two
No more hippies please

by Getoffmyvols

Autumn has arrived
Two more weeks of summertime,
If Vols run and hide.

by Volorado

Foster wears 30
Tribute to injured teammate
Honorable act

by spiritofthehill

A third string quarter-back?
Eric Berry laughs with delight!
This might get ugly…

by Smitty08

You’re not in your bed
But are waking from a dream
In Pasadena

by Bruins102NCAA

The Vols are Ready
Go off to Pasadena
Bring back a W

by bobo_the_vol

UCLA wins
From the intercepted pass!
Yes, I am a troll.

by ranelar

All well-mannered trolls
Are welcomed on Rocky Top
As long as you lose!

by Joel

When the smoggy smoke
descends on Los Angeles
U.C.L.A? – NOT!

by ttocswob

Trouble is Bruin
Earthquakes and wildfires seem weak
When Berry pick’s six

by G.M.U. Vol

Teddy bears are loved
especially by hound dogs
stuffing all over!

by Aerobab

Monopoly

Joel — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 10:43:05 -0000

Monopoly

The Wiz of Odds: The Edited Version of the UCLA Ad

You've got some scouting to do, son

Joel — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 03:20:02 -0000

Yes, football season kicks off tonight. Our game's not for four more days, but there's plenty of scouting of upcoming opponents to keep us busy until then. Yes, you can tell your wife it's scouting. This is serious business we're conducting here. With pizza and bevs.

The Alabama-Clemson game has the added benefit of actually (probably) being a good game to boot, but really, that's strictly an ancillary benefit. You have work to do, and just because you've been looking forward to it for eight long months doesn't mean that you can't claim it as some sacrifice on your part, right? Right? So here's the schedule, starting with Steve Spurrier tonight on ESPN. All times Eastern. Get busy.

Thursday, August 28th
North Carolina State at South Carolina	8:00 p.m.	ESPN (HD)
Saturday, August 30th
Georgia Southern at Georgia	12:30 p.m.	ESPN-GP / CSS PPV
Hawaii at Florida	12:30 p.m.	Raycom / ESPN-GP / Yahoo
Appalachian State at LSU	5:00 p.m.	ESPN
Louisiana-Monroe at Auburn	7:00 p.m.	ESPN-GP / PPV (AL & LA)
Alabama vs. Clemson (Atlanta)	8:00 p.m.	ABC / ESPN-GP
Monday, September 1
Tennessee at UCLA	7:00 p.m.	ESPN

Our mule is a first class mule, thank you: UCLA Bruins talking points

Joel — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 11:25:58 -0000

2 out of 2 disinterested bloggers agree. Dawg Sports and House of Sparky are both picking the Vols over UCLA for this week's Labor Day matchup. Sparky even goes so far as to say it will be ugly. The distinctly partisan Bruins Nation also predicts a loss to the Vols, saying that the defense will have its hands full and that UCLA's only real chance can be found in its running game.

With all this pessimism, the players are naturally dancing the proverbial "chip-on-the-shoulder" dance. It's a bit clumsy and awkward, though, in my opinion. Running back Kahlil Bell trips over his own toes:
"We’re doing all right," Bell said of the oft-criticized [offensive] line. "We’re not as bad as everyone says we are. I don’t even think we’re bad. I’m just sick and tired of it and I think they are too."
Huh. Not as bad as everyone says we are. Decent start. I don't even think we're bad. Whoa, whoa, whoa, Mr. Bell. Try I think we're going to surprise some people or we know what we can do it or something like that. Just not something that essentially says by omission that you might be something less than good. Re-cue the music and watch me this time. We know this routine by heart.
Still . . . some think they have the formula for beating Tennessee, a formula that includes more amusing stereotypes and snobbery. To wit:
"Here’s how the Bruins can start their season off right and send the Vols’ fans back to Rocky Top with nothing but a hangover to show for their mule ride over the prairies."
Hey, come on now. That's one first class mule.

"Pin Tennessee’s tailbones to the goal line and see how they like trying to move across some of the most expensive real estate in the country."
Ooh. Your sod is expensive so you must be good! Unfortunately for you, we'll be measuring in yards on Monday night, not square feet.
"New QB Jonathan Crompton is going to have butterflies the size of fruit bats blindly bumping into each other in his stomach. He must be hit and hit hard."
Jonathan Crompton says "bring it," which, incidentally, is the same thing he told those fruit bats he ate for breakfast.

Um, also this, posted here:
ORLY? Some are saying that UCLA's receivers against Tennessee's defensive backs is "strength versus strength." That could, in fact, be true. After all, strength is a relative term. This, though, from Bruins receiver Marcus Everett, well you decide:
The Pac-10, we throw the ball [across our very expensive real estate]. The SEC, they’re known for pounding the run. Our advantage will be we’re a little more agile, a little more athletic. Hopefully that outweighs the power and strength the SEC brings.
Eric Berry will see you your agility and athleticism, Mr. Everett, and raise you some power and strength.
More like known versus unknown, in both directions. Both defensive coordinators this week -- DeWayne Walker for UCLA and John Chavis for Tennessee -- will be hoping to make their opponents' respective new offensive coordinators miserable. On the other hand, neither of them really knows what to expect, so the misery could potentially boomerang on either or both of them.
A real coach doesn't need QBs. Despite the distinctly bad omen of losing two QBs on two series of plays in the spring, losing one of them again in the fall, and the backup throwing three picks on three consecutive passes this past week, Bruins coach Rick Neuheisel remains "relentlessly optimistic." Or maybe not, as some Neuheisel press conferences are now being termed "ominous," and Neuheisel is beginning to use phrases like "stay in the game," and "growing pains," and "fortunate to win."

College Football News did peg Neuheisel as its 29th best coach. (Fulmer was 33rd and could best be described as "relentlessly cautious.") The thing about Neuheisel's ranking, though, is CFN's justification. They emphasized, among other things, that "[a]t both Colorado and Washington, he won twice as many games as he lost." Wow, so unless they played 15 games or somehow lost 4.5 games in a season, he means 8-4. The Papa gets beat like a non-first-class mule for a record like that. In any event, Bruins Nation appreciates the fact that CFN "isn't just bowing to the company line" on CRN.

By the way, on Fulmer, CFN says that "folks in Knoxville point to a 10-year stretch without an SEC title and zero top 10 finishes since 2001." Is it me, or is it mostly folks outside of Knoxville saying that?
Auto-updating UCLA news and blog feed below.

SB Nation User Blog: Joel

Ghosts and robots: today's Tennessee talking points

An in-depth look at the UCLA Bruins

Schedules

Depth Chart (games/starts)

Key stats from last year

Observations

RTT's foolish predictions on the In The Bleachers Podcast

Kickoff 2008 (via Nastinchka) via EDSBS.com.

Monday Night’s Chess Match: More Notes On the Vols' Offense - Bruins Nation

Monday Night’s Chess Match: More Notes On the Vols' Offense - Bruins Nation

Next question from the next idiot, please

Vote for the Winner of the UCLA Bruins Hail Mary Haiku

Who wins the season's first Hail Mary Haiku?

Monopoly

You've got some scouting to do, son

Our mule is a first class mule, thank you: UCLA Bruins talking points