If I were GM of the 49ers for a day, what would I do?

It couldn't get worse, this team is like poo.

I'd trade Alex Smith the the Montreal Alouettes

For a washing machine, that's what I'd gets.

I'd tell Mike Singletary that Jesus was outside,

than I'd lock the door and wait until he cried.

His face would get red, He'd know he'd been used

And fallen for my rather, clever ruse.

I'd not let him in, no matter how mad he got,

He'd have an aneurysm his head would get hot.

Than he'd be so sad that he'd have to retire,

And I'd hire Marty (Site Decorum) Shottenheimer

I'd punch Jed York, he'd hurt in the worst way

Who cares if I'm fired, I'm only GM for one day.

And when he called the police, I'd run far away.

This was the worst loss I've seen since the Dennis Erickson era, a game where the 49ers just didn't even look like they belonged on the same field with their competition.  This game had no bright spots..maybe punt coverage, but I'm reaching.  Patrick Willis was out with an injury so that hurt our defenses chances..wait, he was there?..Didn't see him play, he was swallowed up by the Chief's guards.  Charlie Weis and Romeo Crenel put on a coaching clinic at the expense of Greg Manusky and some random old guy.  Somebody please explain to Manusky that RBs are eligible receivers..  Further explain to him that there is such a thing as a draw play where the Offense will pretend they are going to pass the ball than use an inside hand-off and run the ball.  Also, he needs to know that sometimes running plays occur outside the tackles.  On the third and long play that Charles ran for 25 yards and a first down Justin Smith stunted out of the play...over and over again the 49er players blitzed one way and the Chiefs ran the other.  Weis was either extremely lucky this game or he correctly charted many of the 49ers trends..I'm guessing the latter.  I'm also guessing that until the 49ers defense learns the concept of a screen play, they'll keep seeing them.

Offense..it's hard to play chess when your pieces are broken.  Alex Smith's short accuracy was...sorry, my vocabulary isn't good enough, there may be no negative adjective in the English language bad enough to describe it.  But OK, the game plan was clearly to run up the middle and impose will or something.  The offensive line got zero push up the middle, the Chiefs fat guys were just too fat and too good at grabbing wieners for this to be effective.  Frank Gore's only weakness as a player is that he doesn't have very good hands as a receiver, coupled with Alex Smith's poor short accuracy this made the logical counter to what the Chiefs were doing on defense impossible to execute.  Enter Westbrook..unfortunately Westbrook only comes into the game for plays that target Westbrook, more predictability.  That was the theme this game, the 49ers looked predictable and the Weis and Crennel ate their lunch.  The Chiefs blitzes all looked genius, they simultaneously would rush six guys and cover all the 49er receivers.  Alex Smith's accuracy was terrible, but he can't really be faulted in decision making aside from not seeing a wide open Gore on 4th and 8 when they were already in desperation mode.  There just weren't any open receivers..ever.  Smith only threw two deep balls one was a pretty decent shot to Morgan in single coverage, the other was to a well covered Crabtree, but for the most part the 49ers didn't even send receivers out in deep patterns.

The 49ers were outplayed this game, but even if they had played well they were so out-coached that they would have still lost, it just would have been a little closer.  This is the worst type of game for team moral, players know when they're out-coached, they know when they're told to zig and the other team zags and it pisses them off.  The biggest argument for keeping Jimmy Raye around at this point is continuity.  Newsflash, continuity is only a good thing when you're sustaining success.  If this guy ever had "it", he lost it a long time ago, cut your losses, cut Raye.  Manusky has never looked as bad as he did yesterday so I'm hoping this is an isolated  thing for him, but he got out Xed and Oed as bad as I've ever seen.  I don't know that firing a coordinator during the season is ever the right move, but at minimum I think it's time for a new play-caller.  They also should maybe bring in a jujitsu guy to teach Davis some counters to wiener grabbing that he can execute in the pile instead of throwing weak kidney punches right in front of the refs, I'll give him this, at least he didn't punch the guy in the face-mask.

Another strong showing overall for the 49er rookies.  I could honestly see all their draft picks making the team.  These grades are not on a curve, a "C" will mean that the player played as well as an average NFL starter/special teamer for this game, so a "C" is not a bad grade for a rookie.

Anthony Davis - May have taken a step forward in pass protection, but he also may have just had a more favorable match-up in Henderson over Mathis.  Davis is still engaging with his head in pass protection instead of using his hands, the difference is that this week it worked.  His feet also looked faster this week, again it may just be that he wasn't playing against Mathis.  His run blocking was solid, but he did get one offside penalty. 

Grade: C+ : the positives this week were slightly better than the negatives, he did a good job of riding his guy out on pass plays and didn't make any glaring mistakes.

Mike Iupati - Another strong showing, also worth noting that the 1st team 49er offensive line as a whole won the battle on the line.  They didn't push the best defensive front in the league around, but they held them at the point and gave their running back a chance for success.  On passing plays Smith had as much time as you can ask for to execute allowing them a nice opening drive TD.  Iupati continues to look very..very..strong.  He did however look (Cue 70s sitcom music) Lost In Space and missed picking up an inside blitz, he was also called for a holding play and than made to "Go to confession" by Father "Flanigan" Singletary. 

Grade: C+: So the bad news was a couple small mental errors, the good news is that Iupati held his own against 1/2 of the best interior line in the league (One Williams played the other didn't).

Anthony Dixon - Dixon didn't have nearly as strong a showing week two that he had week one and he reminded me that he is in fact NOT Frank Gore.  If you ever find yourself on a road trip with Frank Gore and you come to a fork in the road do NOT guess which way to go..first ask Frank, because Frank ALWAYS chooses the right way to go.  Gore is the best in the game at reading blocks and one of the best all time as far as vision and decision making. Dixon has a ways to go.  I cannot emphasize enough that Dixon received good enough blocking to have success this game, but he seemed to repeatedly run into the only guy who could tackle him.  Just a bad day of decision making, but he continued to play hard, and run hard.  He did do some things well.  His pass protection was solid as he picked up a blitz that allowed a long completion.

Grade: D+ : This would be a below average showing for a starting running back.  I honestly think that with the exact same blocking Gore would have averaged 5 yards per carry.  I think given another shot at the same blocking, Dixon would have also done much better, sometimes a guy is just off..  Dixon did do other things well and didn't make any "rookie" mistakes, but the primary job of a RB is to gain yards from scrimmage and Dixon didn't make the most of his carries this week.

Nate Bynam - Byham had another very strong showing and did everything asked of him.  He played a couple snaps at FB and picked up a blitz.  His in line blocking from the TE position was fine and he continues to surprise as an option in the passing game where he's a load to bring down with a full head of steam.  The only thing he could have done was make the catch when he got drilled on a high pass, but it would have been an amazing catch had he held on.

Grade: B+ : To contextualize this grade, I'm grading Bynam as a blocking TE/FB/H-Back not as a TE1.  The only thing that kept him from having a "perfect" game was the one dropped pass.  Byham continues to impress.

Taylor Mays - We got our first taste of what Mays can bring to the table when he put a big hit to drive a Viking receiver out of bounds for an incomplete pass.  The hit was completely clean but very hard and Mays looked around like he may have been expecting a flag, rightfully none came.  Mays also had coverage on one complete pass, it wasn't bad coverage though.  He showcased his speed from the "Gunner" position getting there first on a punt play, but missing the Tackle.  This isn't a terrible thing though because often when the return man has to make a hard lateral move to miss the first guy it sets the next guy down up for a tackle, as was the case on this play.

Grade: C+ : No glaring mistakes and a couple positive plays, I can't wait for Mays to have a breakout game because he seems to have all the tools to be dominant.

NaVorro Bowman - Got pressure and a QB hit on a stunt up the middle but honestly it looked like if he had run a shade faster it could have been a sack.  Bowman doesn't appear to have blazing speed, he's fast for a LB..maybe just not as fast as I had hoped.  His play was solid though. He looked decent in coverage and recorded a few tackles but he was also flagged on a punt for illegal man down field. 

Grade: C : Solid first showing with no flashes of brilliance and one small mistake.  We'll have to see if he gets "faster" when he gets more comfortable in the system.

Phillip Adams - Adams got in for most of the second half and the Vikings wish he hadn't.  He was all over the field, breaking up several passes and making another several tackles.  At least for the second half of his first preseason game, Adams was a star.

Grade: A - : Had he held onto a fourth quarter interception I'd drop the minus, not much more you can ask from him.

The highest profile rookies all got a lot of game experience Sunday with the first team.  This gave everyone their first look at what the 49er rookies are bringing as they try to get it done at the next level.

Mike Iupati - This guy is already the real deal, he looked stronger than everyone he blocked 1v1, got push on every running play and even knocked a couple guys down, if this is an indication of how he'll play this season than his inline blocking is already dominant.  I know it's just one game but I think the instant upgrade label is legit.  He didn't look quite as well in space and he could have been called for a hold on the play Alex Smith threw the tipped interception.  He also had trouble locking onto clean blocks when he pulled, but he's so strong that even when he doesn't get a great lock onto a linebacker he was often able to push them out of the play.

Anthony Davis - Davis looked as bad in space and on the edge as he looked good inline and when he could lock onto his man.  Mathis abused him.  The upside to the way Mathis abused him is that some of it is coach-able, Jamie Dukes did a good job of breaking down what he was doing wrong at half time.  Bending over at the waist and trying to use his head to engage the pass rusher, he wasn't moving his feet or extending his hands like he needs to.  He also just looked off-balance and slow in lateral movement.  He was beaten badly by a Mathis inside spin move, but Robinson was there to pick up the slack.  The good news was his powerful inline run blocking and nastiness.  He got good push in the run game, even throwing his defensive counterpart to the ground a couple times.  He also came into the end of runs and did a good job of pushing (throwing) the pile.  Bottom line he looked huge, strong and mean, but his technique was sloppy.  The pass blocking will have to get better or he's going to get Smith killed. 

Looking at Iupati and Davis together, I really think the 49ers will need to commit to the run to slow down the other team's speed rushers.  For Davis to have a chance against someone like Mathis I think he'll need to be able to hit him in the mouth on several run plays so that he'll be tentative about firing out of his stance in a speed rush.  There was such a differential between Davis' run and pass blocking that I could almost see the 49ers employing a  3D down RT or keeping VD in to block the edge on obvious passing downs.  As of now, leaving Davis on an island with a speed rusher is a recipe for disaster.

Anthony Dixon - Dixon ran with power, more speed than I expected and a whole lot of swagger.  He didn't look like a guy in his first NFL game and while the line opened up some nice holes for him, he also did a good job of making the first guy miss was always going forward when tackled.  If he can keep playing at this level he should secure the RB2 spot.  His play yesterday made me feel a lot better about Glen Coffee's retirement.

Taylor Mays - My initial read on Mays is that he's thinking too much and needs to let the instinct take over.  He looked a little slow to read plays and I felt like he'd have done better if he moved forward while initially reading plays.  There were several run plays where he looked like he would have been in position to clean up a missed tackle, but the first guy got the ball carrier down.  He was beaten on an out by the TE where he looked like he was playing the deep pass, but it was a nice pitch an catch on a timing route so he would have had to make a great play to stop it.  He did get to showcase his ability by blowing up a screen play with no help that could have gone for a big gain.  He read the play well and accelerated behind the blocking to trip up the RB just as he caught the ball.  It was actually a pretty out of control arm tackle, but the guy tripped up so I can't knock it.  Mays looked like he was trying too hard not to make a mistake and he didn't make any glaring ones, as he gets more comfortable I'd like to see him look less tentative and fly to the ball.  I'd also like to see what he can do when they call his number on blitzes, seems like that would really showcase his size/speed.

Overall, I was very impressed with the 2010 class.  Davis looked like he has the most to learn, but after seeing a glimpse of what a beast that guy is I'm willing to live with the growing pains.  The hope is of course that we won't need to see much of Dixon this year, but I also don' t think the 49ers need to be in a hurry to sign a veteran backup.  Kyle Williams also looked really nice in the return game and as a receiver, hauling down a 1st down reception towards the end of the first half, I didn't watch him specifically though or Navarro Bowman and Nate Bynam for that matter so I didn't review those guys.

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After running over Alan Faneca and putting Matt Leinert on his ass, than throwing down with Levi Brown during a recent practice all pro Defensive lineman, shower model and twitter hero Darnell Dockett had this to say:

"You can’t come out here and go 80 percent and expect to win our third divisional title," Dockett said. "It just don’t happen like that. Every day we step on the field we’ve got to go harder and harder and harder. We’ve got to treat them like they’re the 49ers and they’ve got to treat us like we’re the 49ers. That’s the only way we’re going to be able to compete."

(Full Story)

Lets face it, our traditional rivalries are pretty dead.  We haven't been good enough to be on Dallas' radar and outside of the regular season they haven't done much lately either.  The Seabirds were good while we were awful and now we're turning the corner and they hired Pete Carrol, so I don't see much hope there.

Our biggest traditional rival is a doormat and I'm sorry I can't dislike St. Louis with the same intensity that I hate LA, can't do it.  When I think about the Lambs I just feel sorry for Stephen Jackson, but...

Arizona. 

There's something there.  I don't know if it's their Draconian immigration laws, the homogeneous terrain, the terrible weather, a state completely devoid of any culture or the fact that its where all the meth comes from, but yeah..I think if I search my red and gold heart I can hate Arizona.

Than there's Docket and his big stupid mouth.  Twitter VD again, Docket.  I dare you!  They also signed maybe the biggest loudmouth thug in the league, Joey "F'in" Porter over here, forgetaboutit.  Seriously, how easy is that guy to dislike.  Matt "Hot-Tub" Leinert is their QB, hell the last time he was good he played for LA, how perfect is that?

Bottom line, I'd like to propose that Arizona should be our official number one rival.  Well, at least until we beat them back into obscurity and have to feel sorry for them again.

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BEWARE rest of the NFL, Mike Iupati is a giant scary nut!

Bigger, stronger and faster.  Want to see a roster stacked with ridiculous size/speed combination, look no further SF.  The 49ers have used high picks like on players with production (Mays, Davis), injury (Gore, Ray McDonald) and character  (Crabtree, RJF) questions.  Aside from a few need picks over the last few years they don't seem to draft anyone in any round that isn't a physical beast. Last year we started to see the tangible benefits of this philosophical approach as V.D. and Goldson had break out years and Willis put together another All-Pro campaign.  Crabtree did what he could to address the Diva concerns with play that certainly surprised me and I think surprised a lot of people.

The 49ers have showed a great willingness to roll the dice on players who have all the physical gifts but may have red flag that would scare other teams away and they've done it without developing a "Bengals" culture where they blotter and team news are side by side in the local paper.

I'll even give Mike Nolan some credit on this one, he knew when to cut his losses (Antonio Bryant).  For the most part though, the 49ers just aren't getting into trouble.  Correct me if I'm wrong but I believe the team had only one arrest this off-season when Ray McDonald was arrested for a DUI, that would be pretty damn good for any organization of 55 or so 23-29 year old males, but for an NFL football team that doesn't even really seem to draft for character as a priority.. Amazing!  Of course Singletary has to get a lot of credit for this, but it also seems like the 49ers have a lot of players who have stepped up as leaders and are creating a culture of success both on and off the field.

I'm really excited to see what this year’s class of monsters can do.  I think Taylor Mays is going to be a starter early in the season or at least get very significant playing time, and I think he'll make a lot of people regret passing on him, just a hunch.  I also think we'll see more of Navarro Bowman than anyone expects, and I think he's another guy that five years from now will look like an absolute steal.

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It had been 3000 years since the last true hero had walked the earth, but the Gods were ready to be heard from once more.  Zeus summoned Vulcan, Hermes, Hades and Ares and laid forth is command: 

"The world needs a great hero, one who will deliver great championships, first to just a windy sinkhole that nobody really cares about, but later he will lead the football team of the gods to victory! 

"Vulcan you must oversee the Forging of this great hero, cast him of Iron and Gold that he may be strong but also have some bling.  Hermes, you must make him fast enough to snatch a man's heart before it's last beat.  Hades, you must give him a persona of fear that his opponents will shrivel and cry to their mommies when his mere name is mentioned and Ares you must make him battle ready and Fyisical (with and F).

The 49ers are the trendy favorite pick to win the NFC west this year and with good reason.  The team has a young talented nucleus who are responding to their coach. They look to be on the brink of turning the corner as a franchise. 

QB, however remains one of the biggest questions on the team.  The 49ers go into this season with the same starting QB and offensive coordinator that they finished the previous season with for the first time since Joe Nedney had hair.

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This continuity, along with a revamped offensive line and their best receiving corps since......Joe Nedney had hair?  Should give Alex Smith his best chance yet as a 49er to succeed.  The question I'd like to ask though is: How good does He need to be?  More specifically, How good does he need to be to get us to the Super Bowl?

To answer this question I've decided to go back 10 year and look at the QB Ratings of each QB the season they went to the Super Bowl as well as their QB rating one season prior to going.  I'm using QB Rating because it's an objective measure that's easy to manage.  In a way this changes the question to: How well does our QB need to produce to get into the Super Bowl?, but I can live with that.  I thought about going back 20 years to generate more data, but decided that the gain of additional data would have been offset by it's relevance.  The game just changes too fast.

Just looking at the list a couple things stick out.  Most of the guys on the list are considered good if not great QBs and all but a handful were considered the a franchise QB at the time of their SB.  The average QB rating for a starting QB in the last ten Super Bowls is 92.5 the season that they went to the SB and 87.1 the season before they went to the SB (Delhomme and Tom Brady's 2002 and 2000 regular season stats were omitted because they were not starters those years.)  The lowest QB regular season QB rating for a SB QB was tied 73.9, Rex Grossman in 2006 and Eli Manning in 2007.  Grossman also had the lowest rating for one season prior to winning the SB with 66.4. 

Alex Smith's 2009 QB rating was 81.5.  That puts him a little more than 10 points behind the mean QB rating of QB Starters.  It also means that out of 20 starting QBs, Smith had a better QB rating than 5 out of 20 or %25 of all QBs in the last 10 years to start at QB in the SB.

So does any of this answer the question?  How good does your QB need to be to get to the SB? 

Right now, it says that Alex Smith's production is about 10 QB rating points below par (the average SB starter).  So at last year's production level he would lower his team's chance to get to a Super Bowl, but his production would not be so bad that it excluded the chance of a Super Bowl appearance.

Flashback one week to day two of the best Draft party ever.  A three day orgy of Madden 2010, alcohol and ESPN. Well worth flying 2000 miles across country to attend.  The 49ers are on the clock and Taylor Mays is on the board, I make the call.

"They're going to take Mays"

Agent Luna replies "They already have Goldson and Lewis who are basically both Strong Safeties, why would they take Mays?, they need a free safety."

"Well, we both think they should make Clements a FS and move Goldson to SS, but that's not what they want to do, I don't think they care if they have a FS, they just want big athletic Strong Safeties."

And with the 49th pick of the NFL draft the San Francisco 49ers select Taylor Mays..

At the time I was pretty happy.  Not only did the 49ers select another elite athlete and the guy with the most scary size/speed combination in the draft, but also (and more importantly) that I got to be right again (I called the Iupati pick too. 

After reading Barrows Article where he interviews Trent Baalke I realized that I wasn't far off on the reason for drafting Mays either:

There's been a lot written and said about the 49ers' sticking Mays "in the box" so that he's a quasi linebacker. Baalke said the objective is for both safeties to be able to play deep and close to the line of scrimmage. "We want mirror guys back there," he said. "We don't want them (the offense) to know who's going to be low and who's going to be high. The more balanced you are, the more deceptive you can be in your game plan."

Baalke could have just said that the 49ers want to use two strong safeties, but I'll give him a pass, he's new to the GM job and is trying to sound extra strategic.  Assuming the 49ers start Goldson and Mays, they will be one of the biggest and hardest hitting safety tandems in league history (if anyone knows of a bigger safety tandem, post it).  Will it work?, neither of them is known for their man-coverage skills, but both are an upgrade over Michael Lewis (Michael Lewis lost a footrace with Joe Nedney in practice on a bet).  Mays has excelled in Cover 2 where his strait line speed allows him to make up ground on open receivers.  

I think the success of the two strong safety formula hinges on pass rush because not having either safety with "strong in man coverage" on their resumes could give QBs an easy target.  I think we'll see a lot of situations where the 49ers blitz one safety and let the other play center field, minimizing their exposure in man coverage (basically a 46 defense except the offense won't know which safety is staying on the line).  This will put a lot of pressure on the 49ers corners and nickel back, but corner play was an area of strength last year with Shawnte Spencer staying healthy and performing at a high level.

"decent but not great."

What does that mean?

Almost great?

Decent?

Pretty gripping commentary.... Just say you don't know how Shawntae Spencer is doing, or re-tape it after you do some research.  Mel Kiper knows what he's talking about, except when he's full of crap.  It's really hard to tell the difference.  I'd rather see a former general manager who's been in charge of drafts and also been a linebacker for the 49ers; a guy like that provide commentary for a draft than listen to Mel Kiper.  Kiper's most valued asset is not being Todd McShay.

Barrows

Pete Carrol is leaving USC behind this year to coach the Seattle Seahawks.  Will he want to bring some of his players with him?  The obvious answer would be that he would be more likely to draft USC players because he's already familiar with them and knows what to expect out of them.  For example he may have more insight than anyone else as to whether Taylor Mays' lack of interceptions was because of their defensive scheme or what expectations of Mays were emphasized.  He may also be planning on installing a similar offensive or defensive system and want to draft players already familiar with the playbook/terminology.  This insider information could also cause him to take certain players from USC off his board entirely, but the draft is about which team likes a player the most, not the least, so more information and familiarity with players from a certain team; if that were the only factor, would lead to more players from that team being selected.

There may be other factors to consider though.  Carrol may set himself up to look pretty bad if he drafts a player from USC and that player busts in the NFL.  A coaches job can often hinge on perception (mostly when they're not winning).  Picking busts, especially in the first round, is a surefire way to doom a new head coach.  When you ad into this a convenient narrative for the media to latch onto as a story: "Bad Coach brings bad player from his former school to ruin team", it may be too much of a risk for Carrol, especially in the first round.

I'd look for Carrol to grab a couple of his former players in later rounds and to give several un-drafted free agents from USC a shot, but I think he'll steer clear of USC players in the first round because the "image" risk is just too high.

"But all the complaining belies the fact that this rule rarely comes up and, more importantly, addresses the fact that since 1993 nearly 60 percent of the teams that win the coin flip in overtime eventually win.

In other words, some coaches would rather accept losing in exchange for not being second-guessed. OK, that’s probably not true, but that’s how the logic goes if you follow it to a natural conclusion."

If you're going to invoke the power of logic....do your math first Jason.

Just for the hell of it (well because I'm mean and I like seeing tears)  I took a look at the Colts SB Nation site and I couldn't believe how unprofessional their official bloggers are.  Not only do they not enforce any kind of site decorum, but they're in an open feud with some another website/blogger.  I don't always agree with what Fooch or Ninjajames write, but I'm really glad that for the most part our site doesn't degenerate into too much immature name calling and "internet tough guy" posing.  Here's a link their site, scroll down to the tweet just after the "Allow me to disagree with Peter King" article (if anyone knows how to make the link jump to that article just edit this).

Colts Site

I guess this guy BigBlueShoe is their Fooch.  Personally, I wouldn't use this site if Fooch acted like that.....

So, I guess I'm just saying thanks for not being like those guys because I really need my Niner news fix and it's nice to get most of it in one place.

Matt Miacco's article on the 49er's free agents mentioned that they were more interested in keeping Dre Bly than Walt Harris or Nate Clements and that if the 49ers do keep Clements they would want him to take a pay cut.  Clements has been one of my favorite 49ers the last few years, I love the way he attacks the offense and I think his coverage is under-rated.  He's been in man coverage with the other teams top receiver most of the time he's been on the field for the 49ers and while he has been posterized a few times (most notably by Randy Moss), for the most part he's won his battles.  He really excels against big physical receivers, but seems to have problems against receivers with elite speed.  With his size, speed and skill set I think he would excel as a strong safety.  At six feet, 205 he's a little on the small side to play SS, but he's shown that he can tackle anybody and I don't see him having a problem covering tight ends.  Michael Lewis is a such a liability in coverage that Clements would be a huge upgrade at that position and even though I like the tackles for loss in the run game that Lewis provides, I think Clements is a better open field tackler.   Even if the 49ers lose Walt Harris they would still have three CBs that are capable starters in Shawnte Spencer, Dre Bly and Terrel Brown.  I could see a starting secondary of Spencer and Brown at corners, Clements at SS, Goldson at FS and Bly as a nickle corner as one of the best in the league.  Bly at Nickle isn't a knock on his skills, I just think he really excels there because he can freelance more.  I see him as more of a gambler and play maker than Brown.    

All of this would of course be contingent on Clements and the 49ers coming to terms on his contract, but going into an uncapped year if the 49ers let a talent like Clements walk over money it will say a lot about the ownerships commitment to winning.

Here is a list of what you'll need to do:

1.  No diva BS.  We can smell it a mile away, remember we were the first fan base to get burned by T.O. and as a result we have a zero tolerance policy on typical WR Prima-Dona BS.  Marvin Harrison, Larry Fitzgerald, John Taylor: good, T.O., Keyshawn Johnson, Andre Rison: bad.

2.  Be a team player.  I'm not expecting you to make an immediate impact, you missed all of training camp and the first four games.  You're probably going to be used initially as a decoy and slot receiver because I doubt you'll be able to handle the NFL bump yet.  Relish any role or opportunity you get to play even if it's not glamorous and do it to the best of your ability.

3.  Learn to block.  Than put someone on their ass, nothing will redeem you faster than a crushing block, especially if it frees up a long play for someone else.  It will also win you some points in the locker room.

4.  Don't drop balls.  Again, I'm not expecting you to be a huge part of the offense or even to completely know what's going on all the time.  Not expecting you to grasp NFL level nuances or have great chemistry with Shawn Hill.  But in the event that someone is nice enough to throw a ball your way, you better damn well catch it because that's the one thing thats the same at every level of football and a wide reciever who can't catch is about as useful as an analogy that makes no sence, is poorly punctuated; and; is a run on sentence.

I can't believe I feel anything like "compassion" for a rams player.  Is it just me or does anyone else feel sorry for Stephen Jackson after the beating he took on Sunday?  What a waste of talent, personally if I'm building a team and can pick one NFL running back, I'd take Jackson.  I know AP is a better runner from scrimmage, but Jackson is the most complete back in the NFL and he doesn't have AP's fumble problems.  He's one of the top blocking backs in the NFL, he's huge, fast and a good receiver.  He also makes a great spaghetti sauce!  I'm not suggesting that the 49ers trade for him, and Gore would also be very high on my "best back in the NFL list", but I'd like to see SJ get a shot behind a decent O-Line/passing game while he's still in his prime.  I think the Rams are doing some things right as far as building their team back up, they've drafted some D-Linemen and O-Linemen that could develop, but especially with their D-Linemen it takes a while (see Kentwan Balmer).  Bottom line, they won't be good before SJ is old in running back years, especially the way they're riding that horse; %60 of their offense?  Specifically I'd like to see him go to my second favorite NFL team, the Ravens (49ers v 1.0). 

Yes, I'm ripping off the Chuck Norris concept and replacing "roundhouse kicks" with "tackles":

Mike Singletary once tackled someone so hard that his shoulder broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over the Pacific Ocean.

Mike Singletary doesn't churn butter. He tackles the cows and the butter comes straight out.

Mike Singletary can sneeze with his eyes open.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool Mike Singletary once and he will tackle you in the face.

Mike Singletary can tackle you so hard that he can actually alter your DNA. Decades from now your descendants will occasionally clutch their chest and yell "What The Hell was That?"

If tapped, a Mike Singletary tackle could power the country of Australia for 44 minutes.

Mike Singletary doesn’t shave; he tackles himself in the face. The only thing that can cut Mike Singletary is Mike Singletary.

This friday there will be a reunion between Mike Nolan and his most famous draftee; Alex Smith.  I thought it would be a good time to revisit the Nolan regime and evaluate; with some (maybe not enough) hindsight, the drafts that took place under his watch.  Although these draft grades are subjective, they are also completely accurate and not really open to debate (sense of humor check).  Here goes:

2005 – (1, 1) Alex Smith, (2) David Baas, (3) Frank Gore,  (3) Adam Snyder, (5) Ronald Fields, (7) Billy Bajema

C-            Frank Gore saves this draft class, but when you take a bust with the first pick of the draft you don’t get higher than a D unless you draft Frank Gore.  Baas and Snyder have developed into starters with Baas flourishing under Coach Sing’s more physical style of play but when you draft guards in the 2nd and 3rd rounds you kind of expect starters if not eventual pro bowlers (see Chilo Rachal).  Billy Bajema was good while he lasted, we drafted Bajema 2.0 aka  The Bear this year for less money.

2006 – (1,6) Vernon Davis, (1,22) Manny Lawson, (4) Joe Toledo, (4) Michael Robinson,  (5) Parys Haralson, (6) Delanie Walker,  (6) Marcus Hudson

C+           I’d like to give this class a higher grade, but it would be based on potential, not results.  Vernon Davis is a head-case, but he’s a damn talented head-case his blocking has been great.  He’s been inconsistent as a receiver.  Manny Lawson has looked as good as anyone could expect when healthy and will continue to grow into his position.  Michal Robinson’s value goes beyond the stat sheet as he’s excelled on special team. Parys Haralson had some monster games this year and may develop into the gem of this class, if he can play at the level he finished this season at expect a breakout year.   Delanie Walker has looked good at times as a receiver, not sure why he’s not been a bigger part of the offense.  Joe Toledo is named after a city in Ohio, both are on the decline.

2007 – (1,11) Patrick Willis, (1, 28) Joe Staley, (3) Jason Hill, (3) Ray McDonald,  (4) Jay Moore,  (4) Dashon Goldson, (5) Tarell Brown, (6) Thomas Clayton

A              First and most obviously they hit big time on Patrick “The Franchise” Willis AKA BAM BAM!  They traded what would have been a very high 1st rounder for Joe Staley, but in hindsight they got what would have been a very high first round pick had Staley stayed in college another year.  Staley has started every game for two seasons and has the talent to develop into a pro bowl left tackle.  Jason Hill looked disappointing up until this year, but played at a high level towards the end of the season.   Ray McDonald joined the team coming off a serious knee injury but would have been a first round selection if healthy; jury is still out on whether he’ll meet his potential, he’s injured again this training camp.  Jay Moore is a pretty good comedian; the football player by the same name is on the bubble this year.   Dashon Goldson looks good so far in training camp at starting free Safety.  Tarell Brown has the athleticism to be a good NFL corner and should challenge for a starting job this year, he’s been set back by a toe injury.  Thomas Clayton looks like a feature back in the preseason and has the most preseason yards the last two years.  He also has the hottest sister in the league and kisses her on a regular basis.  According to the pro bloggers he may not be a great fit for the 9ers due to poor pass blocking and could be trade bait after this preseason.

2008 -  (1) Kentwan Balmer, (2) Chilo Rachal, (3) Reggie Smith, (4) Cody Wallace, (6) Josh Morgan

C+           Kentwan Balmer looked like a bust last year, and if the draft was held over again he wouldn’t go in the first round, but the pre-season spin is that he’s much improved.  Chilo Rachal will make the pro bowl within the next five years.  Reggie Smith and Cody Wallace look like backups.  Josh Morgan had a great pre-season last year but was inconsistent during the regular season, he looks like a number one receiver by all accounts so far this pre-season, we’ll see.

We can say a lot of bad things about Mike Nolan or as I affectionately call him "Son of a Dick!" (I try to meet a personal quota of five bad things a day), but he was a good boy scout in that he left the area better than he found it.  I'm pretty happy with the talent on the 49ers roster, here's to hoping the Singletary regime will be better at tapping the potential of said talent.

     When the 49ers drafted Michael Crabtree I was pretty excited.  Crabtree was considered by many to be the best prospect in the draft so landing him with the 10th pick seemed like a major coo.  Now, before he's even taken the field the honeymoon is over.  Rookie receivers  (even ones that end up being great) usually aren't very productive and being late to or missing training camp obviously doesn't help the cause.  So as Crab holds out for more money, his value continues to diminish.

     The continued emergence of Josh Morgan and Brandon Jones isn't helping his cause either.    Regardless of if or when Crabtree shows up, the 49ers look to have their best receiving corps since he who's name shall not be spoken left SF. 

     If Crab's plan was to get the 49er fan base or local media on his side, than it's not working.  Personally, I'm sympathetic to most contract disputes.   I get annoyed with the argument that these guys make millions of dollars to play a game when many owners inherited hundreds of millions of dollars to sit on their ass.  In this case there's just no basis for the hold out to get sympathetic about.  He thought he should be drafted higher?  Really?  That’s all you've got?  Cry me a river that runs into a creek made out of shit than go up it without a paddle..

     I hope the 49ers have made it clear in no uncertain terms that they will not pay Crabtree more than he is "slotted" to make and that if he continues to be unreasonable than he can sit out of football for a year.  If they fold on this, than agents will smell blood and the 49ers will be in hold-out hell next season.  

The only thing Crabtree is accomplishing with this hold-out is making the Raiders look smart for not drafting him..Come to think of it making the Raiders look smart is quite an accomplishment, congratulations.

    "It’s all fun and games until someone pokes an eye out."  Mrs. Hazletine (SFUSD) 1984

     If I read an article about how Rex Ryan, Steve Spagnolo or any other new coach was going to have a "brutal" training camp with lots of live hitting I'd laugh my ass off and be reminded of how "tough" Steve Marinelli's training camps were in Detroit.  Brutal hitting in two a days are for High School right?  "The Nutcracker" drill, really?  What's next "Bull in the ring?". 

    So why such blind trust in Singletary?  I'm not sure really, but I do know that my trust in Singletary defies logic.  Maybe in the back of my mind I'm afraid that if I don't believe in him he'll show up in full pads and tackle me on the way to work.  No, it's not irrational fear, must be something else.  Is it his eyes?  Maybe he's just so intense that he wills me to believe that his methods aren't madness. 

     What happens if a key starter goes down with an injury in one of these drills?  Will I doubt him than or just write it off as collateral damage.  I heard Mike Golic on ESPN talking about it and he's been drinking the Kool-Aid too, he said Singletary seems like a guy he'd love to play for and he had this crazy look in his eyes like he was going to suit up and ask for a try out.

     Singletary has what the military refers to as command presence.   He exudes confidence even when what he says doesn’t make much sense.  I don't remember his exact quote, but it was something like this:

We're going to run the ball.  We're going to run the ball when they know we're going to run the ball.  We're going to run the ball when they take their DBs off the field and line up with 12 linebackers in the box, in fact we're going to tell them the play first, then we're going to run the ball and if the other team doesn't like that than we'll run the ball.....

When I heard him say it I remember thinking simultaneously that it was really bad football strategy but that it was also going to work.

**I'm noticing that people took my misquote a little too seriously, sometimes sarcasm doesn't work in text based humor, but I thought the whole 12 linebackers in the box thing would be a clue that I was exaggerating.  Here's the actual quote:

I want to know I have the ability to know that I can run the ball. I want to have the ability to know that I can impose my will on the defense. I want to know that in the fourth quarter, I can run the football. I want to know that when they put eight people in the box, I can still run the football, if I want to. … When everything settles and we need to control the football, I need to know that I can run the football and I’m not trying to do anything fancy at that time. I want to run the football."