Hello, this is a feature that will go through what the Flames players, prospects, and personnel have been up to in the past week. I didn't go crazy in Grande Prairie, so that should be reason enough for you to read.

We'll be back to Mondays next week - a travel day was needed.

I know it's been talked to death at this point, but I look at the NHL's scheduling of the Stanley Cup Finals and all I can think is "what the hell?"

I really don't see how a break of 5 days benefits the league. The NBA's scheduling now means that they'll have the national spotlight in America, while the NHL drifts out of the collective consciousness of the population. I'm not in favour of the break if it's designed to let the teams rest, either. The reward you get for finishing a series quickly is rest. If you have to go 6 or 7 games, you shouldn't get the majority of the week to recuperate.

Maybe it's just me.

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Hello, this is a feature that will go through what the Flames players, prospects, and personnel have been up to in the past week. This week, we have a movie after the jump, so get your popcorn ready.

After a lovely long weekend, the Round-Up returns.

There's just something inside of me when it comes to competition that makes me hate my opponent. It's not so much that I actually dislike them, it's just that they're standing in the way of my goal - which is why I love displays such as the one shown to us by Peter DeBoer and John Tortorella last night.

Far be it for me to go all Grantland on you guys, but that sort of emotion and hatred for your opponent is what makes me love sports so much. At its most basic level, hockey is not much more then 12 guys on the ice chasing around a cylindrical rubber object. But, when the human psyche and competitiveness is revealed throughout the course of the rather repetitious contest... yeah, that's the stuff.

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Hello, this is a feature that will go through what the Flames players, prospects, and personnel have been up to in the past week. After the jump, something will probably make you angry. Just a guess.

I really don't understand why anyone is surprised Dale Hunter's stepping down.

Seriously, whenever you watched the guy in an interview, it just seemed like he hated having to talk to people. Not in that Sutter "grumble I'm better then you stop questioning me" way, but rather in the "sigh why am I doing this" way. Point is, people have been talking about the possibility of this happening pretty much ever since Hunter got the job. Guy has an extremely successful junior team and he doesn't seem like he wants to be involved with the NHL? Buh-bye.

This whole thing was likely a favour to George McPhee more then anything else.

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Hello, this is a feature that will go through what the Flames players, prospects, and personnel have been up to in the past week. Things actually happened over the past 7 days, so there's a 1000 words after the jump for you to "enjoy."

I'm in Las Vegas this week, and I am prepared to lose money. Too much money.

In an attempt to relate those last couple of sentences to hockey somehow, I'd like to bring up someone we called the Riverboat Gambler a few times during his tenure in Calgary - Darryl Sutter. To me, it seems as though there's been a lot of revisionist history when it comes to Darryl's tenure as coach here, what with his recent success as coach of the Kings.

Sutter is, and really always has been, a guy who's had an amazing goalie cover up the problems his team has. Nabokov in San Jose, Kiprusoff in Calgary and now Quick in Los Angeles - all guys who were/are overworked by Sutter. Now, the Kings aren't done yet so I won't make any definitive statements regarding them, but in Calgary Sutter coached a team who couldn't defend or score, a team that got hot at the right time and rode an amazing goaltending performance to the Stanley Cup finals (seriously, the '04 team was soooooo bad) and a team that was 27th in the league in producing goals. Not exactly a sterling resume, in my opinion.

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Hello, this is a new feature that will go through what the Flames players, prospects and personnel have been up to in the past week. As there's been nothing new from the big club in terms of player movement, let's take this opportunity to see what the head office and the kids have been doing this week, shall we?

A lovely, but bi-polar week when it comes to the weather the last 7 days, huh? Well, bi-polar's probably an accurate description of my interest in the NHL playoffs as well. The series themselves? They don't really do anything for me. But once we hit overtime- even in the Devils-Panthers series- I'm enthralled. The vacillation between the two is fascinating and leaves me to wonder why the concept of sudden death is so alluring. Compared to my relative apathy for the rest of the action, my belief that playoff overtime is the best thing in the world only grows.

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At the beginning of the season, I came up with 20 predictions. Since we're now in the "playoffs" (whatever those are), I thought it'd be a good time to look back and see how I did.

1. Jarome Iginla will play at least 75 games this year. How effective he will be remains to be seen, but he'll at least be on the ice.

Well, that's a good start. Iginla played in all 82 games this year, scoring 30+ goals for the 11th straight season.

2. Miikka Kiprusoff maintains his pattern of sub-par goaltending with a EVSV% around .915.

Well... nope. Kiprusoff was 12th overall (min. 20GP) in EVSV% this season, with a .928.

3. As a result, we will see Henrik Karlsson in at least 20 games this year, and he will post at least a .920 EVSV%.

Oh god awful. Karlsson only played 9 games this year-although that was due in large part to his early-December knee injury. He finished with a .910 EVSV%.

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Ten Thoughts

-Nice to see Akim Aliu get his first and second career goals today, even if both were extremely lucky. I'm not sure he's an NHLer, even at replacement-level, but it's a good story.

-Mike Cammalleri fishing Aliu's first goal out of the net was a pretty good demonstration of why everyone loves him. He had 19 points in 28 games with the Flames this year, with 11 of those being goals.

-Good for Henrik Karlsson getting his first win of the season. A real tough year for the guy, and likely the last time he suits up for the Flames.

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I've got my things, I'm good to go.

Lines after the jump.

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As you probably know, today's game is the last in the Calgary Flames' 2011-2012 season.

Even though the majority of the season-save a 10 or so game stretch-has been miserable for fans and team alike, I'm still a little sad it's concluding. I don't want it to end, which is a revelation surprising even to me-and thoroughly unexpected, given the state of the team. To see the solitary "Ducks vs. Flames" gamethread sitting in the cue leaves one wondering what could have been if that one little thing had gone differently.

It's not so much that the Flames won't be playing in the round of 16 for the third straight year (although I wouldn't be complaining had they made the playoffs), but rather the significance of yet another year wasted. Purportedly, a season like this under the "watch" of Jay Feaster will lead to sweeping changes; or at least it will should his rhetoric regarding both "intellectual honesty" and the team being "a meritocracy" hold true. Could Thursday's game be the last time we'll see the greatest Flames goaltender clad in red, yellow and black? Is it possible that a sure-fire Hall of Famer could be discarded by a delusional ownership group? Will an attempt to shed salary lead to a dismantling of a defensive corps made up of one man?

Of course, these questions will be answered in due time, but until then...there's a game to be played.

Henrik Karlsson is penciled in to get the start in the match, and I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say this will likely be the final chance he will have at a win in his NHL career. It's become painfully obvious that Karlsson, while possessing some solid fundamentals, cannot get away from the positional phenomenon available to him due to his height-the tendency to drop into the butterfly too quickly. This creates a few massive weaknesses in his game-the inability to stop high shots, rebound control (or lack thereof) among others.

Personally, though, a win for Karlsson-and this sad-sack edition of the Calgary Flames-in the final game of the season would warm my cold heart by at least half a degree celsius.

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We headed to hell for heaven's sake.

Lines after the jump.

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I wanna die with my chin up.

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I really can't justify typing anything else out regarding that effort tonight. Here's some videos.

Fuck Ken King and Fuck Murray Edwards. They are ruining the hockey team I'm (irrationally) loving, and apparently people agree with me, judging by this and this. I can't even bring myself to blame Brent Sutter (who probably does deserve some blame) or Jay Feaster (who probably doesn't).

Feel free to swear and stuff in the comments. Everything's fair game.

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I can tell that we're going to be friends.

Lines and video after the jump.

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Tonight, the Flames and the Colorado Avalanche play for the final time this season.

The teams seem to be trending in opposite directions-one has youth, a outstanding rookie and some good possession guys, while the other has some old dudes that people are actually starting to actively dislike. There will be more talk about that last point come the off-season, I'm sure.

The Avalanche enjoyed a nice day of rest here in Calgary yesterday-and they deserved it, too. The game tonight is their 16th of the month, just one less then the Flames will play. It's been a rough month for the Avs, as they've gone 7-7-1, pretty much dropping them out of the playoff conversation-much like the Flames.

Much discussion was had in the Media room today regarding the (probable) death of the team this year. Sure, it's possible that the team will go 4-0. But it's the point that the Flames will have 4 days next week where they'll be sitting on their couches at home, watching the other teams pass them by. The feeling of helplessness will be unbearable.

Now that you're sufficiently depressed, Cory Sarich is returning tonight.

One interesting thing to note: today all of the players were wearing NHLPA hats.

Some audio after the jump.

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I'm sorry Momma, but I've been drinkin' again.

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Hold me love, until we disappear again.

Lines after the jump.

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The Calgary Flames have a stalker!

The Stars have followed the boys in red back to the Dome for will likely be yet another peg in the metaphorical cross for the Calgary Flames. Certainly, they're not eliminated mathamaticaly, but logically, only a 5-0-1 or 6-0 run can/will save them. Dallas looks to be a lot more comfortable in terms of playoff positioning, as they currently hold the spot that goes along with being the Pacific Division leaders. Nothing is set in stone, however, as they are part of the 5-team group who's members have either 87 or 86 points.

No one in the Flames' dressing room will say it's over, but for all intents and purposes right now it's over. The Flames have done well in collecting loser points this season, garnering themselves one point in many games they probably deserved to lose outright. It's probably this luck that has them as close as they are to the playoffs. Phoenix and Los Angeles have done well in that regard too; one can only wonder where the Flames would be if their shootout skills (which made them one of the best teams in the league last year) hadn't completely imploded from December on.

Cory Sarich probably won't play tonight, which means he only has 5 more games left in a Flames jersey. That 3.6 million coming off the cap would make up a large chunk of the change needed to secure a true top-four guy like Matt Carle to a deal. Alas, it is not rosterbation time just yet. No other word on the infirmary ward front.

As the Flames are pretty much locked in to the 11th or 12th overall pick, it doesn't make sense for "fans" to cheer for the team to lose. Might as well hope for some entertaining hockey now that the results don't matter so much.

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Ten Thoughts

-Nice to see the one-knee one-timer return with Mike Cammalleri getting his 16th of the year in the first.

-Even though the shots and scoring chances in the first were close, it appeared to me that the Stars were just running the puck down the Flames' throat for the majority of the period. The Flames wheeled it in a little near the end, though.

-At some point in the first, Rob Kerr called the crowd in Dallas "a nice and big afternoon crowd". I'm, uh, not totally sure that was correct.

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Don't you know that we're the lucky ones?

Lines after the jump.

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Smiled and said, "Yes, I think we've met before".

Lines after the jump.

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I've tried to write this god damn thing 4 times now and it keeps coming back to one central point-this team is tiring.

The Flames are in Minnesota tonight for the final time this season. The Wild have been in that weird "playing-out-the-string" mode for the better part of two months now; the one that leaves the fans split on whether or not they should cheer for the team to lose (securing a better draft position) or for them to win (the basic thing we want as fans). To their credit, Wild fans have mostly been positive regarding their team's future.

Of course, I don't need to tell you (and frankly, don't want to) that this game is a "must-win" for the Flames. This is an incongruous statement and always has been; until the day comes where 2 points at the end of the season is more valuable in the standings then 2 games at the beginning of the season, I will dismiss the claim out-of-hand. I understand the need for mainstream media members to create narratives; they sell papers.

I suppose it's a bit absurd to say that I'm pretty much emotionally drained when the Flames still have 8 games left to play. I guess it's more that for the past few seasons as they've been drawing to a close my actual emotional level has consistently grown more bi-polar: the losses this year hurt way more then they did in '09, and the wins give me way more joy in '12 then pretty much every other year I've watched this team. This is a ridiculous statement, because I vividly remember the run in 04, the entire 08-09 season, the Young Gunz era, all of that bullshit. I don't know.

The Flames will get some players back tonight, as it's possible Lance Bouma, Chris Butler and Blair Jones will return tonight. Even if those three players were completely mediocre in every conceivable way, their return(s) still make(s) the team better simply by relegating AHL-level players back to the AHL. A tepid "yay" is in order.

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Shut your eyes, let me tell you crazy lies.

Lines after the jump.

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This is not a cry for pity; nor for sympathy.

Lines after the jump.

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Remember when Aaron Johnson was like the 7th or 8th defenseman here in 08-09? Well, he's the Columbus Blue Jackets' number four guy going into action today. That's pretty much all that needs to be said while discussing the depth issues of Columbus.

Tonight's is the last game of the year against the BJ's for the Flames. It's no secret the Flames have struggled against the worst team in the league, going 1-1-1-with the win coming in a shootout (what a fucking sentence that is). Really, watching this team play against teams lower in the standings then they is extremely draining-ostensibly, the Flames should be winning these games no problem; at least they've had 3/4ths of a NHL team for the majority of the season. But for whatever reason, the Flames don't really take advantage-a 15-9-3 record against teams lower in the standings then them, with 6 of those wins coming in the shootout. That's basically a 96-98 point pace extrapolated over the course of a full season-again, against the worst teams in their league. Very sad.

Columbus has settled down since the trade deadline, although I am still baffled by how the (admittably pleaseant) General Manager of the Jackets, Scott Howson, has managed to stay employed for the entire season. On trade deadline day, the rumour du jour was Rick Nash for Ryan Callahan, Chris Kreider, some Murray kid, the Rangers' 1st rounder and the man hated by all, Tim Erixon. I can only assume someone inside one of the organizations was drunk and texting Bob Mackenzie insane things, because that's an entire 2nd line and 2nd defensive pairing for a guy who is extremely overrated.

Lee Stempniak will make his return tonight, after missing more then 20 games with the nefarious "high ankle sprain". He should slot in on the third line, playing with David Moss and Blake Comeau. Miikka Kiprusoff will get the start tonight as well as the rest of the remaining games. This is the fourth time in five games the Flames are facing an opponent on the second half of a back-to-back. Talk about nice scheduling.

The Flames' loss number is down to 3.

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"I am death," cried the vulture.

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Cut, cut, paste.

Lines after the jump.

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Vancouver really can't do anything right, can they? Last night, a two-goal lead in the first ten minutes evaporated as the Phoenix Coyotes decided to take a huge dump right on Roberto Luongo's face and score 3 of the next 4 and 5 of the next 7 to win the game.

God Damnit.

Anyways, the Coyotes roll into town on the second game of a back-to-back tonight currently sitting pretty at 81 points (good enough for 7th) with one more game played then our hometown heroes. Obvously, it's been beaten into the ground how important these games are, so I'll just assume you've been paying attention and won't spend any time on that.

It's nothing new to say Mike Smith's had quite the season this year. We all know how Dave Tippet's teams have played in the past-a stingy, almost trap style with a lot of possession drivers to make up for the lack of high end scoring talent-but it's unlikely that style of game has really helped Smith that much. As of right now, he owns a .932 EVSV-good enough for 4th in the league among regulars this season. If you want to find a large reason for the 'Yotes success, he's standing in between the pipes.

Usually, a high EVSV% comes a high PDO, and it's a sign of unsustainable luckiness. However, that doesn't look to be the case with Phoenix, as they currently sport a 1008 team PDO-barely in "yeah, OK, that's good" territory. The team's higher-then-usual PDO is backed up by their Shots percentage, currently hovering around .520. I wish we had Don Maloney as our GM, because he continues to do a unreal job in the desert.

For the Flames, don't expect any change from Tuesday's collective fan crescendo-until more guys start to return from injury (likely one of Tim Jackman, Lee Stempniak, Chris Butler or Lance Bouma), don't expect pre-lava Gollum to change much. Miikka Kiprusoff will likely get the start tonight, meaning Leland Irving will tend goal in Shelbyville.

It's the final game of the season between these two teams.

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It's always easy to forecast others' doom.

Lines after the jump.

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