Well Gang..its that time of the year again.Tomorrow is my Birthday (Jan. 20) and you know what that means. It is time to get off your fat ass and buy me a present. That’s right damn it, and this year I want way, way, way more presents than last year. And just because you gave me a present last year doesn’t get you off the hook for a bigger one this year.

What, you ask, is on my B-Day list in 2012..No: Its not an evening with Kristen Stewart or a new Lear Jet or Tweeter lessons... NOPE. I want the same stuff as you gave me last year on my birthday: All you have to do is grab a few canned goods, some household items, maybe some gently used blankets or a warm jacket ..stuff like that and go to your local FOOD BANK/HOMELESS SHELTER and donate it.

2011 was an extremely brutal year for the dislocated, the mentally ill, the teen runaways and those suffering from drugs or running from abuse. Single Moms with kids without work and marginalized families without homes need a bit of help from those of us who are in a position to share our good fortune. In 2012 the government, Non-profits, Temples, Mosques, and Churches will be hard pressed to help even as much as last year. The struggling economy has hit our support services hard and even more people will be in need for shelter, clothes and food than last year. It is beyond belief how hard it is to live on the streets or in shelters and especially difficult in winter.

So instead of giving me those box seat season tickets to the Reds…take a few bucks and turn it in to something that will make a big difference on this cold winter day for a less fortunate person, one who is not that different you or me...someone who has been overwhelmed by circumstance and is in dire need of our help.

There is so much aid going to Argentina, Chile, Japan etc (and they need it) that local food banks and shelters actually lose donations in these times of great disasters.Please participate. it is so easy to do. Give now, give plenty, and give often.

Thanks Again!!

Your Pal Mads

Of course the season hasn't started but tell me who is your fav going into the season..My New Fav Red Player is Jonny Gomes...sure I am Jay Bruce fan..big time and I love me some Corky Miller and who doesn't love Bronson Arroyo?

I like Gomes because he doesn't fuck around, He comes to play, works hard and has a mature point of view regarding competition and  the  dynamics of  being a team player as well as a great singing voice.  He is not the best guy on the team but now that he's not over matched my MLB pitching I think this will be a breakout year for my new fav Red  He's no Laynce Nix but still damn good

Moose pulled his Hummer into the stadium Valet area, tossed his key to the Hector the Hispanic kid who parked the cars.

"Hey, Moose you gonna hit one for me today? Called Hector

"Yeah kid - 3rd inning. I hit one out for you and you get me a date with your sister Eileen" "

Sure thing Moose you know she's only seventeen" replied Hector as he climbed up into the bright yellow machine.

 "Yeah but that's in Colombian years, Dude" Moose laughed heartily and walked across the short concourse and into clubhouse. He pushed past Spanky the clubfooted clubhouse manager, who fell awkwardly into the side of the scalding hot tub.. "Move it Spanks..I'm late.."

 "Soreeee Moose."

Moose scowled and made his way past the guys as they were dressing towards his double locker at the end of the row.

"Well looked what the fucking cat dragged in - you are late Pal" It was Rusty Potato the team's loquacious and inept good guy manager.

"Sorry Skip, I would have been here on time but it took longer than usual to please your daughter", This retort brought peals of laughter and under-the-arm fart sounds from the players as they good naturedly called out names like bi-eetch, hoe, skankette, skag and other pet names for the Skip's youngest daughter, Lucy.

Moose stood in front of his locker door mirror and gazed momentarily at his 6'5" frame and shaved head - God damn I'm a hunk he thought. He opened the door and there it was his uniform shirt #1 - Seaman.  Moose Seaman had shot through the minor leagues and this was only his 3rd season but already he was a team leader, starting first baseman and was beginning to think abut the big, big, big contract that loomed at the end of this season. "Yo, Senor Mouse" It was the slick fielding 2nd baseman of Pittsburgh Pirates Julio Julio.

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Well Gang..its that time of the year again.Tomorrow is my Birthday (Jan. 20) and you know what that means. It is time to get off your ass and buy me a present. That’s right damn it, and this year I want a lot more presents than last year. And just because you gave me a present last year doesn’t get you off the hook for a bigger one this year. What, you ask, is on my B-Day list in 2011.. its not a date with Heather Mitts or another BMW 521i or a new Lear Jet...

NOPE. I want the same stuff as you gave me last year on my birthday: All you have to do is grab a few canned goods, some household items, maybe some slightly used blankets or a warm jacket ..stuff like that and go to your local FOOD BANK/HOMELESS SHELTER and donate it.  2010 was a terrible terrible year for the dislocated, the mentally ill, the teen runaways and those suffering from drugs or running from abuse since the great depression.  In 2011 the government, Non-profits, Temples, Mosques, and Churches will be hard pressed to help more than last year. The poor economy has hit our support services hard and even more people will be in need for shelter, clothes and food than last year. It is beyond belief how hard it is to live on the streets or in shelters and especially difficult for single mothers with small children.

So instead of giving me those box seat season tickets to the Reds…take a few bucks and turn it in to something that will make a big difference on this cold winter day for a less fortunate person, one who is not that different you or me. Yet someone who has been overwhelmed by circumstance and is in dire need of our help. There is so much aid going to Haiti, Australia, Brazil etc (and they need it) that local food banks and shelters actually lose donations in these times of great disasters.Please participate. it is so easy to do.  Give now, give plenty, and give often.

Your Pal

Mads

Hey gang...old Mads is looking to purchase a used copy of ROSETTA STONE SPANSISH. If anyone out there in RR land has a version that they'd like to unload let me know. I need it for a Xmas present and am too poor to buy it new. This request has nothing really to with Reds baseball other than my oldest daughter wants to teach her three son to speak Spanish...so if any of them should become MLB team mangers..... You can: Facebook me Email me RR me Call me Thanking YOU in advance. Mads

Sparky not doing well.

Ii appears that the only MLB manager to win the World Series in both National and American league health is declining rapidly. I can only wish him well and hope that he is not in great pain.They sure don't make 'em like Sparky no more.

I remember, as do many of the other old timers here at Red Reporter, how a young unknown AAA ballplayer came out of nowhere to inherit one of the great Major league teams of all time, The Big Red Machine and guide it to back to back series wins in '75 and '76. Do you have favorite Sparky Anderson story?

A Red's Quasi-koan So Walt said that He'd have a yea or nay today.. But now were looking at Monday Position Players arrive on Tuesday Dusty Baker'd. The 2010 Reds are kidding themselves if they go into 2010 without a VP like Jonny Gomes. If the young gun aren't ready...we'll have Gomes..he hit 20 HRs in 98 games or 1 every 5th. game. http://news.cincinnati.com/article/20100221/SPT04/302210033 /1071/Gomes++decision+due+by+Monday

Well gang..its that time of the year again..It is my Birthday (Jan. 20) and you know what that means. It is time to get off your ass and buy me a present. That’s right damn it, and this year I want a lot more presents than last year. And just because you gave me a present last year doesn’t get you off the hook for a bigger one this year. What is on my list this year? No it’s not donations to Haiti or giving your car to WVXU or giving away your old junk to Good Will.

NOPE. I want the same stuff as you gave me last year on my birthday: All you have to do is grab a few canned goods, some household items, maybe some slightly used blankets..stuff like that and go to your local FOOD BANK/HOMELESS SHELTER and donate it. 2008 was the worst for the dislocated, the mentally ill, the lost and those suffering from drugs or running from abuse since the great depression. In 2009 even more people were in need for shelter, clothes and food than last year. In 2010 the government, Non-profits, Temples, Mosques, and Churches will be hard pressed to help more than last. The economy has hit our support services hard.

So instead of giving me those box seat season tickets to the Reds…take a few bucks and turn it in to something that will make a big difference in the day of a another person, one who is not that different you or me. So if you don’t want me to go BONZO on you please participate. There is so much aid going to Haiti (and they need it) that local food banks and shelters actually lose donations in these times of great disasters. Give now, give plenty, and give often.

Your Pal

Mads

In 2010 I resolve to be more accepting of others points of view even if it means throwing up in my mouth during a Charlie Brown reference. I resolve to be nicer and less curmudgeonly to those who don't share my existentially freeing bleakness. And I pledge to support Slyde and the gang who put this show on the road to the minimally least acceptable level. (Fucking Sabremetricians)- just kidding, its the Madville way to make fun of that which I don't understand. . Finally I pledge to be less self indulgent and stop writing expansive novels instead of incisive comments.Although I am working on a short version of the life of the Famous Harlem Globetrotter Kevin "K-Mart" Craquehead. Finally (This time I mean it) I resolve to attend more RR functions, pay my overdue RR dues (and my back dues) and to stop with the jpegs of beautiful professional and collegiate women athletes. And pray tell what are your resolutions?

Moose pulled his Hummer into the stadium Valet area, tossed his key to the Hector the Hispanic kid who parked the cars.

"Hey, Moose you gonna hit one for me today? Called Hector

"Yeah kid - 3rd inning. I hit one out for you and you get me a date with your sister Eileen" "

Sure thing Moose you know she's only seventeen" replied Hector as he climbed up into the bright yellow machine.

 "Yeah but that's in Colombian years, Dude" Moose laughed heartily and walked across the short concourse and into clubhouse. He pushed past Spanky the clubfooted clubhouse manager, who fell awkwardly into the side of the scalding hot tub.. "Move it Spanks..I'm late.."

 "Soreeee Moose."

Moose scowled and made his way past the guys as they were dressing towards his double locker at the end of the row.

"Well looked what the fucking cat dragged in - you are late Pal" It was Rusty Potato the team's loquacious and inept good guy manager.

"Sorry Skip, I would have been here on time but it took longer than usual to please your daughter", This retort brought peals of laughter and under-the-arm fart sounds from the players as they good naturedly called out names like bi-eetch, hoe, skankette, skag and other pet names for the Skip's youngest daughter, Lucy.

Moose stood in front of his locker door mirror and gazed momentarily at his 6'5" frame and shaved head - God damn I'm a hunk he thought. He opened the door and there it was his uniform shirt #1 - Seaman.  Moose Seaman had shot through the minor leagues and this was only his 3rd season but already he was a team leader, starting first baseman and was beginning to think abut the big big big contract that loomed at the end of this season. "Yo, Senor Mouse" It was the slick fielding 2nd baseman of Pittsburgh Pirates Julio Julio.

"Fuck you Glue-Boy, you little hispo-faggot turd" Julio lifted his left leg onto the bench in front of his locked and bending over while clasping his knee with both hand ripped off a tremendous gaseous release.

"Who shit?" Called LaRonne Robinson? Robby was the Pirates leadoff centerfielder who also played point guard for the Boston Celtics.

 "Mexican Crop duster - Dive Dive Dive Dive" called out Charyles Suggs the Pirates backup catcher and practical joker! The clubhouse was roaring. Camaraderie  before a big game. This was what its all about thought Moose, this is the big time.

 "All right you jokers, everyone in the dug in 10" Called out Rusty Potato as he pulled a polished Austraillian Q-Tip from its silver carrying case and began to absently rub it behind his left ear "What a great bunch of guys..Man, I don't get why we are already in last place 9 games out. But hey its early, the law of averages says we'll get hot soon. "Lets go Duck" Rusty called to his pitching Duck Dickhouse who was still in the bathroom stall dropping a load" "Go on up Skip I'll done in about 15". Rusty headed up the hall towards the filed he was pumped.

While I sit around and wait for the ink to dry on RayMoan's contract, I am struck dumb by excitement that Hernandez's signing has caused especially at one of the places work. My secondary work place is full of about 25 blue collar guys from 28 - 67 yrs. of age. these guys are big time sports fans - they talk sports, they eat and drink sports...to a man they are excited and relieved that Hanigan will not be considered for the starter's job in 2010. When I attempt to discuss Hanigan's on base percentage and moving him up to the #2 spot in the line up I am literally shouted down. Now I know I'm right and they are wrong but I can see why the Red's management could be heavily swayed to give the fans what they want. In this case Hernandez. And that management probably agrees with them.

Interestingly these same guys have little use for Taveris, Jannish or Dickerson. They love the Rolen move, love BP, Bruce (to a point) and Votto too. Guys like Gomes, Ballentien and Nix are shrug offs, nobody thinks that they are 'The Real Thing' and that the Reds need a big stick in LF (these are same guys that really hated on Dunn). Also interestingly this group of sports addicts are high on Stubbs and Fransisco.

I see the nearly 25 guys I work with 2.5 days week (who are totally into Football and Basketball right now) as comprising the average fan. They believe that Castellini made millions off the team in 2009, that the the reason for a lower budget for 2010 is so that Big Bob can make even more money, that the price to go to a game is outrageous and that we should be trading away guys like Harang and (many say) Jay Bruce for a proven veteran LF. Yet, half of these guys don't know who Todd Frazier is, 75% don't know Chris Heisey. Arroyo is their favorite pitcher with Voltron  Homer and Lehr next on the list. Pretty much to a man they think Harang is washed up.

Phil Castellini probably has had the same interactions that I have in talking to fans...hell he probably agrees with them. He'll pay attention to what fans say they want in an attempt to fill the seats. My guess is that this translates into a pretty boring and mediocre season for 2010.

The hopes I hold to is that Walt will pull off something...to spice up the roster or that one of the young guys will have a breakout Spring Training.

Enough of this as I really need to get to work on Slyde's novel.....

Well Gang ...no news on the Arbitration front, the FA front or anything regarding filling the missing holes in the Red's lineup for 2010. Sure its early but already the signs are prevalent: We go with what we got and hope against reality that somehow everything will come together and the Reds will be competitive...........

Meanwhile not a word from Slyde regarding my request to be his literary agent - Nothing from the Burgerfest gang about changing the nite to an evening when I can attend. .........

Justin talks of baseball suicide while Fat Vegas Alan reappears in the nick of time.........

Me...well I was pretty bored but after reading the recent posted commentary about the Reds having no money and the possibility of dumping BP and having Jannish as the starting SS...well that got my attention. Then again Spring Training is a ways off...who knows what may happen..............

More importantly we've UC Football 10 - 0 straining to break into the top 3 nationally. A good Xavier men's BB team, a good Xavier women's BB team, an interesting UC men's team and a less interesting UC women's team but a very interesting woman's new team coach. So a lot to keep us occupied until February. .............. Plus occasional installments of Slyde's novel are on the way. Really what more could you ask for in the middle of a severe and ongoing recession?