They say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery...

WHY?

Is this a nightmare that I'm trapped in?

Someone's not just sitting around during the lockout!

If you didn't love Dirk already, prepare to fall head over heels or bow down in worship, or at the very least, be extremely grateful that this incredibly humble man is the face of this franchise. The whole interview is a must-read, but here are some choice quotes:

Regarding leaving the game when there was still a few seconds left on the clock:

I only know that many of our PR people ran after me. They yelled: "Stay here. You can't do that. The trophy is going to be presented." I said: "I don't want it." I got into the shower, pressed my face into a towel and began to cry. Then I heard them yelling again. "Dirk!" I said: "They should give it to someone else." Not exactly worthy of a champion, is it?

About sponsorship deals/endorsements:

There certainly isn't a shortage of offers. You wouldn't believe how many watch manufacturers have sent me their models. Just like that. I give them all away. I am satisfied with what I have. How crazy do you have to be when you can afford everything but still clutter up your life with all sorts of advertising appointments? No thanks.

Receiving a gift from a legend:

A boxing glove with the inscription: "You are the greatest." Please don't ask me immediately about the political meaning of the gift. I was simply happy and sent Ali a golden basketball with a similar inscription.

"It’s amazing, just the emotional roller coaster of not only being in the NBA but being in the playoffs and some days playing and some days not and contributing. I was on the sideline and I was doing all I could to keep guys focused and motivated and excited. Then coach came to me and said, ‘Hey we are going to put you in we are going to insert you insert you instead of Peja.’ It was awesome. Heck the first time he called my name in game two, even though I played only a minute, I was thinking geez he must’ve knocked over a glass of water, he wants a towel or something and next thing I know I am going in game two of the finals. I am just checking in and I am giving Neil, our equipment guy, my warm ups and I am like, ‘Neil, holy smokes what the hell is going on here?’ It was unbelievable. It was a blast."

From the article:

Instead of everyone casting about for ways to explain Nowitzki's transformation now that he has a ring, we should celebrate the fact that he hasn't transformed at all. In being exactly who he's always been, he defies the silly notion in American sports that an athlete has to don armor, psychic or otherwise, to win a title. Nowitzki has never been the guy who screams into the upper decks like a maniac after each and-one. He's never tried to be. He's one of the best low post scorers in the NBA, but you'd never know it because he doesn't play with his back to the basket like other seven-footers. Instead of dunking opponents through the rim, he's mastered a step-back shimmy to get off a soft jumper that nobody can defend and that often leads to a free throw that almost always goes in. Softly. Nowitzki doesn't charge into battle. He fades away. And he wins because of it, not despite it.

They will appear via satellite from AAC. Hopefully the Robot will bring the lulz...don't disappoint me, Carlisle, we all know you're programmed to feel!

Shaquille O'Neal announces his retirement via Twitter; he will have a press conference on Friday from his home in Isleworth (FL).

More sourcery

If this actually happens, I will need video footage...I bet no one can lob over him! I wonder how good Dirk's serve is...

Kevin Garnett finished second with 77 points (only one first-place vote) and Tyson Chandler finished third with 70 points (20 second-place votes).

More sourcery

The Nets have acquired Deron Williams.

Devin Harris and Derrick Favors will be traded to the Jazz, along with two first round picks.

New Jersey will send Troy Murphy to Golden State, while the Warriors trade Dan Gadzuric to the Nets.

Also reported on ESPN.

And he owns a Shake Weight

More N.B.A. players are starting to look abroad for playing opportunities, exploring options for next season if there is a lockout.

Dallas Mavericks All-Star Dirk Nowitzki, who hails from Germany, has told German newspaper The Bild that he will likely come home to play if the N.B.A. is shut down.

Basketball superstars Kevin Garnett, Dwight Howard, LeBron James, Steve Nash, Dirk Nowitzki, Shaquille O'Neal and Dwyane Wade will lend their voice talents to an upcoming episode of THE CLEVELAND SHOW airing this winter on FOX.

Kidd's (and others') thoughts on the inspired move of colliding with Hawks' coach Mike Woodson.

I couldn't come up with 75 words...I might be the only one here following the game, anyway!

He says he'll be ready when the season starts and I hope that's true!

DALLAS -- Dallas Mavericks swingman Josh Howard took a significant step Wednesday by scrimmaging for the first time since undergoing minor reconstructive surgery on his left ankle in May.

Howard, who got doctor's clearance for contact work Monday, participated in about half of the practice before icing his ankle.

buckets, this is for you! :)

Now Matty has no excuse for missing threes. By the way, goggles and a headband? So hot.