Ladies and Gentlemen,

College football season has ended, and as we stare into the abyss that is the offseason, I wanted to take this opportunity to thank you all for playing this year- I enjoy putting on Stupid Upset Picks, and I'm glad that you all found it to be as entertaining as I have. Y'all are a great group of people, and I've really enjoyed watching the games and all the jokes and stories and goofy shit that we've witnessed together.

And now, without further ado, I would like to announce that this year's winner was: VUfaninNJ, with an astounding 74 points!

The final standings, for everyone that scored any points this season, are as follows:

Inspired by the glorious work of Doug here, I felt these needed to be saved, for posterity's sake.

Don't worry if your coach's name is [REDACTED],
You don't want the coaching search to be too protracted

Just find someone new, a strange somebody who
Has never had previous contact with you!

Don’t worry if he plans to coach through the playoffs
At the end of it all, you will see there’s a payoff!

Though of thinking about football you might seem a bit rusty
At least now you can finally forget Sandusky.

-LoneStarHoosier

You'll go to the Rose Bowl, but get your ass beat.
And the media will say your Zook is on the hot seat.

“But no!” you will say, “The improvement! The gains!”
And then he will start the next season with a home loss to Maine.

-Ancient Chinese Secret

Some days are grellow.
Some are yeen.
For different days and different teams.

You’d be surprised how many ways
We change for Different Colored Games.

On Bright Volt Days how good it feels
to score TD’s and kick our heels!

On other days we’re other things.
On All White Days we flap our wings.

Some days, of course, are Carbon Steel.
And we march quickly down the field.

Then comes a Yellow Day and wheeee,
We win one-hundred-eight to three!

Gray Day…everything is gray.
Our secondary makes eight picks today.

We’ll play so fast it gets surreal!
On our Silver Days that’s how we feel.

Green Days. We kick no PAT’s.
We go for two on each TD!

On Lightning Days they’re sad. They groan.
They can’t keep us out of the end zone.

And when our days are Anthracite
We’ll cram it down your throats all night.

Then come All Black Days. Autzen’s loud.
Your O-line false starts every down.

Then comes a Throwback Day. And WHAM!
Eight hundred yards of offense? Damn!

You might think that all our unis suck,
but you just got throttled by our Ducks.

-HoodRiverDuck

I searched high and low for the book on Kiffin
But I’m easily distracted so I ended up spliffin’

Now I’m tired, so I guess I’ll just pout
Til I find the story of how Lane lost to Timeout.

-stempke

A Zook would be great, but why not a Richt,
A coach who will last, a coach who will stick,

He’ll beat lots of teams, some good but most bad,
You don’t play UF and of that, he’ll be glad,

Mamas will love him, and on camera he’s nifty,
You don’t need a Zook who can benchpress 450,

No you don’t need a zook, what you need is a Richt,
A man who will kneel on down 2 and then kick.

-Big Shock

A Richt would be great, but why not a Crxxm?
To mark the point of your football team’s doom,

Over Monroe and Lafayette you shall be triumphant,
Against ranked teams, however, a win was not meant

How many other coaches can lose 3 to 2
Giving the fans a case of diarrhea-do

If your trophy case has run out of room
Have no fear of overcrowding when you hire a Crxxm

-The Assman 1

A Crxxm would be great, but why not a Sark?
A coach who will make legions of your fans bark.

He’ll talk of recruiting, and closing the border,
while your state’s recruits scuttle town in short order

He’ll beat some bad teams, you’ll earn a nice rank
And at the end of the season, surely you’ll tank

The offense is great, you’ll think that its heaven
You’ll score 56 (and give up 67)

Your fans are delusional, they’ll say that you’re back
While your biggest rival keep on winning the Pac

-David Piper

A Sark would be great, but why not a Weis?
Fourth and seven? Fuck it, let’s roll the dice!

An offensive genius with ego in piles,
And linemen who look like flabby turnstiles.

Three-hour long pressers, blabbing and bluster,
And defenses as tough an old feather duster.

Yes, you don’t need a Sark, what you need a Weis,
He’d be a steal at a third of the price.

No Weis, you say? Then how 'bout a Davie?
Offense as fearsome as Switzerland’s navy!

He’ll blow snot rockets and play for a loss,
he’ll get you sued and sell out his boss.

Although it’s true, he beat Pete Carroll one time,
He also lost to Oregon State 41-9.

He’ll bitch and complain, Aggieland is his dream,
Just look out for that damned hot dog machine.

-Ancient Chinese Secret

If Davie's not your thing, maybe T-Will
His chip shot is sure to give alumni a thrill

Willingham’s your man, a molder of men
3rd and Fifteen, he’ll get you ten

Not easily rattled, stoic as can be
Tyrone’s the best coach off the tee.

-stempke

A Davie would be great, but how bout a Willingham?
He’ll convert your offense into a sacrificial lamb

He will get off to a good start, maybe 10 and 0
You’ll give him an extension; thus begins the sorrow

Two years later, you’ll struggle for a single win
To 56-0 losses, you will become akin

-The Assman 1

A Weis just might do, but consider a Nutt!
He’ll preach in a church, or in a Pizza Hut

He’ll preach on the field, or at a press conference
It’s that Baptist stuff though, no worries ’bout incense.

Unfortunately this preacher speaks in tongues
And can go on forever – he’s got some great lungs.

He’ll be so busy preaching you’ll think “this is great!”
But even a preacher shouldn’t lose to Jax State.

-allicolls

There is but one man who'll avert disaster;
Your team must seek out the one true Divemaster!

His gleaming bare scalp may blind through your shades
But the seniors will treasure their champion grades.

His signature play is known as the dive,
Oft snuffed out by children of no more than five.

Though your ranking and rep and mind, they may totter
What youth could resist playing for Sgt. Slaughter?

-car.full.of.midgets

In Notre Dame lore, there'th loth of great folkth
But none can compare to the great Doctor Holth

Sure, now he’th reduthed to a thidekick for May
But he wath a champion back in the day

Hith offenthe will give NDNation a bone
Ath the blubbering fat-ath thit-th with Reeth all alone

Left in hith tank I’m sure there’th a little
Oh wait, that’th not gath, it’th jutht thpittle.

-alexanderkotov

There'th no cointhidenth there Mither Reverend
Your Lord truly ith with the Irish from Thouth Bend.

If He wathnt with them then why would you thee
Coach Holth pick them each week on TV?

The Irish have been lotht and wandering thinth him
But he will renew them with elderly vim

The Good Lord hath thaid he’d not flood uth again
But when Lou’th giving thpeecheth? All betth are off then.

-alexanderkotov

There's some who might say that your Zook is a weenie;
If that is the case, why not get a Pelini?

Pelini’s the coach that you want to engage
if your program requires a surfeit of RAEG.

He’ll masticate gum till it’s gone without trace,
berate all officials, get up in your face.

A wop like Mangino, but much, much more svelte,
Pelini won’t lose to the MAC or Sun Belt.

If you need a coach like a Weis needs linguini,
stop Zooking around and go get a Pelini!

-Go Big Rev

But if to a Pelini you've beckoned
Be careful, he might just explode any second.

A Pelini can you up to the land of Big Ten,
And get you a few wins in conference – what then?

Your coach will turn the shade of Lil Red
and your players will fear that they’re better off dead.

No, what you truly need is a Hoke!
(Just how far are we going to carry this joke?)

-lhb98

A Hoke? A Hoke? Now surely you joke
You don’t need a coach the size of Jabba the Hutt
What you need, sir, is a new Houston Nutt

Why, recruiting will look like you’ve just gone to heaven
When he steps up to the podium and signs 37

And if your QB’s arm is like soggy cannoli
He’ll go get you a nice, used Masolli

“GIGGETY!” he says, and everyone listens
(No one knows what he means, but when he says it he glistens.)

Jimmy Sexton says an extension he’ll earn
All will seem well; portraitists will set up easels
And then three years later you’ll learn
that he’s crazier than a sack of rabid weasels

-DevilGrad

A Nutt may be nice, but a Groh you must see
to find what your program truly can be.

Old NFLAIDS you’ll find quite endearing
“Gang Green”? No, gangrene is that feeling of searing

While others play checkers, he’ll claim to play chess
But pissing off high school coaches he’ll do best

Your governor your board of visitors’ protests will end
So your conference your rival will soon join and win

Need an OC? He’ll hire up his boy
You’ll fire him, yet still pay as he brings Saban joy

And when it’s all over, you truly will know
Alumnus or not, a Groh’s still a Groh.

-JoshCVT

Pelini, you say? Why not a Tyrone?
He’s got charisma like styrofoam!

He doesn’t recruit, he just golfs, four to a group,
and his quarterbacks always look like they’re taking a poop.

Consistency is important, and he’s second to none.
He always loses to USC by 31.

Yes, you need a Tyrone while your program wanders,
and then he calls you racist in front of Jon Saunders.

-Ancient Chinese Secret

Tyrone is good, but you should be learnin',
that nothing’s as good a good ole Mike Sherman

NFLAIDS, its in his pedrigee
he’ll punt everytime from their 33

He can coach with the best in any first half
Third quarter adjustments? Dont make him laugh!

He coached Brett Farve, that’s all you need know,
Enjoy as your team goes from ‘suck’ to ‘blow’!

-Lucas Jackson

Might I interest you in one Tim Brewster
Known to recruit well, but out coached by a rooster

Lives by the code, “Win, Fight, Try”
Claim to fame: Made Erik T cry

Will lose to Iowa by a double fives
His receivers treat the ball like an active beehive

Other coaches will mock him with well timed digs
But his replacements will win multiple bronze pigs

-stempke

Who needs a Brewster when you can have Tubs?
Boringest of all the boring old shlubs.

Couple with three years of Brandon Cox
And you’ve got a veritable Fox in Socks!

They call him The Gambler, but don’t be a fool
His punting to win will lead you to drool

He can make Tony Franklin’s “NASCAR” look slow
But hey, he did manage six in a row.

-alexanderkotov

These other coaches? No. No. and No.
The correct answer is a supersized Mangino.

With a girth that requires a custom made truck.
Informing his players that their father’s a drunk.

Giving young men guidance; not a little, but a lot.
By reminding them if they don’t practice, in the ghetto they’ll be shot.

So go out and get a Mangino today.
Oh, the places you will go & the things he will say!

-DoYouLoveHawksorHate'Merica?

Pelinis may howl and yowl and roar
But Sabans will do that, and oh, so much more

Hell spank and recruit midst the yelling and roaring
And bore you to tears with his offense so boring

But your team will win games with his no mercy plan
Though you’ll feel kinda guilty for being a fan

But sorry, the Saban won’t leave where he’s at
(Unless you can offer more money than that)

-TexaninNYC

Saban? No thank you, I've got a Kelly.
He turns five different shades every week on the telly.

The quarterbacks rotate, back and forth, in and out,
for your star receiver, he has only one route.

Sometimes you play well, other times like pushovers,
but there’s always a metric shit-ton of turnovers.

Things are improving, well, maybe, I think.
In the meantime, someone please pour me drink.

-Ancient Chinese Secret

You're missing the point, a Chizik's the key
Make him an offer, entrenched he will be.

Mint coins and change logos, he’ll splash on the scene
Then lose to Kent State, going 5 and 19

His chin is so chiseled, his grin you will know
But don’t ask him to coach in a place that has snow

“God says ESS EEE SEE” is the tale he will tailor
When he learns that his new team can’t even beat Baylor

You pick out a Chizik, the fans will go on
(But everyone knows the real power’s Malzahn.)

-Narrow Right

Your Kelly and Cincy's Jones left us with Enos
A genius’ glasses with the head of a…um…dog?

Mt. Pleasant’s a cradle of coaches no more
With spread gurus gone, NFLAIDS bores

With Radcliffe the Marginal under the center
He left us a bitter 3-9 for the winter

A few weeks ago, chipbird and I shed a tear
“YOU TELL US HE’S STILL COMING BACK NEXT YEAR?”

(But we won’t let his incompetence come between us
We can all still laugh ’cause his name rhymes with penis.)

-alexanderkotov

Cheer up, my friend, the outlook is sunny.
At least you don’t have Frank Spaziani.

Yes, he’s loyal, almost to a fault,
but his offense is like pudding assault.

He’s a nice enough fellow, and his mustache is grand,
but Tom O’Brien thinks his team’s a bit bland.

You might think it’s bad, that your coach has no plan,
but, hey, at least you’re not the Boston College fan.

-Ancient Chinese Secret

His ACC brethren may be down on their luck
But Paul Johnson simply cannot give a fuck

Instead he’ll just call the option again
And again and again and again for the win

While pundits and commenters it may not please
Paul Johnson continues to release ALL THE BEES

And so it rolls on every day after day
Until the bowl season or U[sic]GA.

-alexanderkotov

A Johnson is good, but to Shapiro he pales
as long as Shapiro is released on bail.

Abortions and hookers, tons of cocaine,
And the 6-6 Miami Hurricanes.

He’ll bring in recruits and ply them with booze,
and then they’ll go out and lose to the Hoos.

Yes, with a Shapiro you can do quite a lot,
for example, crashing a jetski into a yacht.

-Ancient Chinese Secret

Psh, those boats and hoes are all fun and games
Next to the five exploits of one Mister James

We know that Dallas sure has some lookers
But now thanks to him it’s less some five hookers

But by enough he was paid by the Ponies to rush
That now he can cough up to keep it hush-hush

And to rescue his son from the Dread Pirate Leach
Surely, the Senative is now in his reach.

-alexanderkotov

Come come! Lets' run! lets' run to the beach
A ship is docking and I see Capt Leach

Now here is a coach to guide your blue team
Down the field with passes the offense will scream

He’ll fire a cannon into the broadside
Of conservative fans both far and wide

He reads you the weather, he writes you a poem
He shows up at times in alumni homes

He shows off genius with his football sense
But he may make you forget that thing called “defense”

So kiss goodbye to “Linebacker U”
And say hello to the new “Maction U”

-BoKno

Say what you will about ole Jimmy Tressel
At least his players weren’t on Nevin’s vessel.

They played golf, had fake jobs, and got ink
But it took the FBI to raise up the stink.

Once from Youngstown, where corruption reigns,
He rode Dave and the punt to a position of fame.

Alas, Now Jim’s stuck on the side in Indianapolis
eating ranch on a scooter with the general populace.

-MikeLew

But really, any futher this talk need not go
For there are those among us who most surely know

There are much greater agonies facing supporters
Of teams try’n to replace coaches not good with reporters

Ironic that someone would mention Ol’ Indy
Where o’er on the sidelines it might get quite windy

From the waving of a towel infused with great powers
Brought on a long journey from the land of sunflowers

So remember when you complain, some of us wince
’Cause for all of your problems, you never hired Ron Prince.

-jonfmorse

But how 'bout a GERG, if you're thinking defensive?
He’ll be just like Saban, but a fourth as expensive.

He’ll line up two safeties across Lake Superior,
And bury a ‘backer in a DT’s posterior.

He’ll keep the stuffed animal makers alive,
And hold Illinois to a mere sixty-five.

His Super Bowl ring mesmerizes like Weis’s.
He’s the man that you need to escape from this crisis.

-Tremendous

Thank you all for making this Friday one where I could not stop laughing!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Alas, the bowl season is almost upon us(remember, there is no pick of the Army-Navy game, due to it being the only game on the schedule this week.) As such, it is time for the Bowl Editions of Stupid Upset Picks. Remember, there are TWO selections to be made from the bowls, one from this set, and one from the other set(entitled, cleverly, Stupid Upset Picks, Bowl Set 1).

NOTE: There will be no score update between Bowl Set 1 and Bowl Set 2, as that is the weekend of New Year's, and I will be doing other things.

There was not much movement in the scoreboard during the last week of the regular season, as only a couple of people recorded points, thanks to the efforts of Clemson and Southern Miss. The scores are as follows.

And now, the games for the second set of bowls, which runs from December 31st through the BCS Championship Rematch on January 9th.

In this set, I'm taking Wisconsin to win the Rose Bowl.

Good luck, and happy picking!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Alas, the bowl season is almost upon us(remember, there is no pick of the Army-Navy game, due to it being the only game on the schedule this week.) As such, it is time for the Bowl Editions of Stupid Upset Picks. Remember, there are TWO selections to be made from the bowls, one from this set, and one from the other set(entitled, cleverly, Stupid Upset Picks, Bowl Set 2).

NOTE: There will be no score update between Bowl Set 1 and Bowl Set 2, as that is the weekend of New Year's, and I'll be doing other things.

There was not much movement in the scoreboard last week, as only a couple of people recorded points, thanks to the efforts of Clemson and Southern Miss. The scores are as follows.

The games for the first bowl set are the bowl games between the 17th and 30th of December, for a total of 18 games.

From the first set of bowl picks, I'm taking Iowa State.

Good luck, and happy picking!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

We are at the last regular season week for Stupid Upset Picks. I know, I know, I hear the cries of "I want to pick the Army-Navy game!" However, that is the only game next week, meaning that everyone would pick the underdog, and then everyone would score the same number of points. As such, there will be NO picks for the Army-Navy game, and this will be the last week of the regular season.

HAVE NO FEAR, though - There will be two(2) bowl game picks, which I will post once the bowl game announcements are made. A note for those of you working out end-of-season strategies: Bowl games often do not have large spreads, so take that into consideration with any hopes you have of catching the leaders.

The standings, after last weekend's games, are as follows:

And, there aren't a ton of games this week, but there are still some that are worth your picks, listed below.

I'm taking (Fuck) Clemson to beat Virginia Tech, and I don't know why.

Good luck, and happy picking!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

There was quite a bit of movement in the scoreboard this week, as DERP was in full effect, and lots of people took advantage of it. Aside from the K-State scoring, there were quite a few people who picked Virginia and won points. However, nobody correctly predicted Iowa State, meaning that everyone left some points on the board.

A reminder - there will be two picks for bowl season, one from the first half of the bowls(well, first 18, as there are 35), and one from the second half. In the unlikely event of a tiebreaker, the largest individual upset will take the title.

The scores, after last week, are as follows:

And, this week's games are:

I'm taking Arkansas to upset LSU in the "Battle for the Boot". Good luck, and happy picking!

Hello all,

Sorry for this being late, but I just can't kick this sickness. Hopefully it goes away before Thanksgiving...

Anyways, here are the standings.

And, this week's games:

I'm taking Kansas St. over Texas.

Good luck, and happy picking!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Hard as it is to believe, the first two thirds of the college football regular season(by number of weeks) are over. A reminder, there will be two bowl picks, so if you intend to play for the rest of the year, there are 7 remaining chances for you to score points. Sorry about the delay, personal stuff got in the way last night.

This week's games are a bit interesting, but no OMG matchups, like the "GAME OF THE YEAR OF THE WEEK OF THE ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ" from last week, on which a couple people scored points.

I'm going to take Army at home over Rutgers. Good luck, and happy picking!

Oh, I almost forgot - Here are the scores after 10 weeks of play - remember, if you're not listed, you haven't scored any points yet, so hurry up and get on that!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

We've played through nine weeks of Stupid Upset Picks so far, and the leaderboard is full of pretty high scores for this point in the season. I knew you degenerates would make it so, and yet I'm still pleasantly surprised by the results and turnout this far into the season.

There were quite a few upsets picked correctly this past week, and the shuffled standings reflect that. Remember, if you're not listed, you haven't scored any points yet, and at this juncture, you better start shooting for big upsets, or you'll never win.

There are plenty of games ripe for the upset this week, including SEVEN games not on Saturday.

I'm taking Vanderbilt to pull the shocker in The Swamp. Hell, the game's called Stupid Upset Picks for a reason!

Good luck, and happy picking to you all!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Welcome again to Stupid Upset Picks- this is Week 9, and there has been quite a bit of movement in the standings. Two players previously with zero points have jumped into the top four, thanks to Texas Tech's stunning upset in Norman(Sorry, Chloe!). Our leader from two weeks ago sits dangerously close to falling out of the top five, and there are THIRTEEN players within 10 points of the lead. This one looks like it's going to go right down to the wire.

The standings are as follows - and please remember, if you're not listed, that's because you haven't scored any points yet, and I'm trying to keep the scoreboard from being too unruly.

This week's games provide some interesting possibilities, and are listed below. My pick is, as always, at the bottom of the post.

I'm taking Iowa State this week. Good luck and happy picking to you all!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Holy crap, it's already Week 8 of the college football season- this time of the year always flies way too quickly. Thankfully for me, Ohio State won last week(despite completing only one pass!) and are on a bye this week, so I have a little freedom in my pick.

The standings after Week 7 are as follows - remember, if you're not listed, you haven't scored any points yet. Time is beginning to run out, so GET ON THE BOARD ALREADY!

This week's games present some interesting matchups, as well as a couple of possible chances to channel your inner Grossman and say "Fuck it, I'm going deep." Included are our first Tuesday and Sunday games of the season, so enjoy!

I'm taking North Carolina this week. Good luck, and happy picking!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Shocking to say, I know, but we are almost halfway through the college football season. At this juncture, I generally like to review the rules, so that people who haven't been playing multiple years or are jumping into this season late can make sure they've got them down pat. So, here we go:

The rules:
1) You may pick ONE game each week.
2) Your pick must be in by the time your game kicks off.
3) You are not locked out if you don't pick before the first game of the week kicks off(ie, you can still pick a Saturday game on Friday, even if Thursday's games have already been played).
4) Your pick for the week locks at kickoff of the game you picked.
5) If your team loses, you get 0 points. It does not matter if they cover the spread or not.
6) If your underdog wins, you get the value of the spread(ie, you pick a 7 point underdog, they win, you get 7 points. Doesn't matter if they win by a late safety or by 3 touchdowns).
7) You do not have to play every week in order to be eligible to win.
8) Please make a new comment for your pick- do not reply to another comment, because
9) If you want to change your pick, please reply to your original pick, so that I see it with your name.

Of particular note, as those at the top of the leaderboard may be planning strategy(a bit early in my eyes, but hey, whatever) - There will be TWO bowl selections, one from the first half of the bowl games, and one from the second half.

And now, this week's scores - And, a note- it felt really good to mark all those "Auburn +10" picks red this week. Remember, if you aren't listed yet, I haven't lost track of your picks, you just haven't scored any points yet.

This weeks games are as follow:

Again, I'm taking OSU, because I must stick with my team. Good luck, and happy picking!

Well, that was an interesting week, there...Lots and lots of people picked the Clemson upset, which changed quite a few scores. And, given the shit shows that OSU and Nebraska put up, 60% of the "big names" in the B1G are looking mediocre at best.

Anyways, here are this week's scores- remember, if you aren't listed, it just means you haven't scored any points yet.

And now, for this week's games-

I must take Ohio State this week, as I would feel horrible if they end up winning, and I don't get the points from it. Good luck, and happy picking!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

With the completion of Week 4, a good number of teams have completed a full third of their regular season football schedules. And, now that I'm on the board thanks to jonfmorse's Wildcats and Jacory Harris' inability to gain that last yard, I'm more than happy to bring you this week's standings, which are as follow:

A reminder- if you are not yet on the scoreboard, that's because you have 0 points. It's not a personal slight, it just makes reading the scores much easier. And now, on to this week's games:

I'm taking Northwestern this week. Good luck, and happy picking!

Ladies and Gentlemen,

After a terrible showing by the Ohio State offense- COME ON, FELLAS- at least the Browns had the decency to try and salvage my weekend of football. Anyways, there were quite a few upsets this week, and there was quite a bit of scoring this week. Without further ado, here are the standings after Week 3- remember, if you aren't listed(like me), you have not yet scored any points:

And now, the games for this week:

I'm taking Kansas State this week, purely out of spite.

Ladies and Gentlemen,

Welcome to week three of Stupid Upset PIcks- through two weeks, we've seen quite a few upsets, some excellent football games, plenty of DERP, and more than a couple of teams escaping, barely, from teams supposedly "below" them. The rules, in case you haven't played before or have forgotten them, are in the first week's thread, located here.

Without further ado, here are the standings so far. A reminder- if you haven't scored yet, you aren't listed on the scoreboard, in order to save space and some of my sanity.

And, the games for this week are as follows:

I'm taking Michigan State this week.

Ladies and Gentlemen,

After an exciting first week of football, full of "sure thing" upsets that never happened, "no way" upsets that actually happened, and everything in between, I bring to you the scoreboard after week 1, and the games for week 2.

First, a note: If you are not listed on the scoreboard, that simply means that you have not yet scored any points. Given how many are playing, this makes reading the post much easier, and also saves some space on the site.

First, the standings:

And of course, this week's games- remember, the home team is the one in ALL CAPS:

I am taking Penn State at home, to upset Alabama

The basic idea:
Each week, you pick an underdog. If they win, your score is the value of the spread. Your points accumulate throughout the season. Highest score at the end of the season wins.

The rules:
1) You may pick ONE game each week.
2) Your pick must be in by the time your game kicks off.
3) You are not locked out if you don't pick before the first game of the week kicks off(ie, you can still pick a Saturday game on Friday, even if Thursday's games have already been played).
4) Your pick for the week locks at kickoff of the game you picked.
5) If your team loses, you get 0 points. It does not matter if they cover the spread or not.
6) If your underdog wins, you get the value of the spread(ie, you pick a 7 point underdog, they win, you get 7 points. Doesn't matter if they win by a late safety or by 3 touchdowns).
7) You do not have to play every week in order to be eligible to win.
8) Please make a new comment for your pick- do not reply to another comment, because
9) If you want to change your pick, please reply to your original pick, so that I see it with your name.

In one of the recent open threads, an opinion was espoused that "people come here for the comments, not for the posts." I find this to be sadly mistaken, and it has been bothering me for a couple of days, so I have to get this out there. I'll understand any "tl;dr" sentiment, but I really hope that I'm not the only one who feels this way.

While some may come here for the comments more than anything else, I doubt that is the case for most people. I, for one, am constantly awed by the way that Spencer, Holly, Doug, and all the other contributors here write, and through their writing, connect thousands of people from a wide array of backgrounds, fanbases, and beliefs about football, to say nothing of the hinted at political spectrum they cover or the actual physical distances separating all of us. I could not do it, Most people cannot do it, and while it may go unspoken, I really hope that they know exactly how grateful I am for that.

I've broken the rules from time to time, though I try not to, and that has become clear to me through our recent "summer conditioning". And yet, I'm changing how and what I post, yes because being able to interact with all of you is important to me, but moreso because acting in that way is what the people who run this site want- the people who create beautifully touching odes to former coaches, to family, to the game itself, and, in the next breath, they write wonderfully constructed dick jokes, mix in cocktail and reading recommendations- and they put up with me, when I usually don't deserve it.

Finally, that community that I, and I assume most of you, hold so dear exists only through their benevolence. This place is truly unique among college football sites, and if you think that's because of anyone or anything other than those names on the mastfoot, you're sadly mistaken. It takes a special, extraordinarily giving kind of people to run this place, and while we definitely don't say it often enough, I hold this place precious, and I want to take an opportunity to extend that gratitude to those who make this internet "home away from home" possible.

Spencer, Holly, Doug, Commentariat At Large, I am here what seems like all the time, and I love it. I have fallen short of the expectations held for us, and I apologize for any possible moment of anger or frustration or disappointment or sadness that I have caused you, no matter how minute. I can do better, and I will do better, as an attempt to be worth of the craft so beautifully practiced here.

-MikeLew

Slappyice puck has Nashville trying to stave off elimination against Vancouver, Ohio State is playing for the men's volleyball national championship against UC Santa Barbara (though I'll probably be the only one watching that at all), and there's got to be other stuff going on.

So, talk about that, talk about what you're drinking, talk about whatever else you're watching, talk about Sunday's plans, honestly I'm just trying to get to 75 words, and done.

This was a question that was bouncing around on twitter the other day, and I thought I'd move it over here, to see what you all thought.

The question is pretty basic- What five college football places, that you have yet to visit, are your top five destinations for a game?

I have been to the Horseshoe, the Rose Bowl, ND Stadium, FSU, and the Swamp. I've also been to Michie Stadium, Between the Hedges, and the Big House, but not for games. The top five places on my "want to go to there" list are:

1) Baton Rouge for a night SEC game.

2) The Red River Shootout(yes, dammit, I still call it the RRS) at the Texas Fair.

3) Neyland Stadium to see the Vols and the Vol Navy

4) Lincoln, Nebraska for Ohio State-Nebraska.

5) West By God Virginia, ideally to see a Backyard Brawl or WVf'nU-VT

Just missing the cut are Autzen, Michie Stadium for a game, the Big House for a game, an Iron Bowl at either place, UGA for a game, Wisconsin, and Texas, just off the top of my head.

So, I made a Yahoo! group for the board. The link is here, it will open in a new window.

The scoring is currently 1/2/4/8/16/32, but I'm up for other scoring options if you have good reasoning. I need a group of words here, so I'm going to make an extremely long run-on sentence that doesn't really make any sense but hopefully will get rec'd because it ends with the phrases "Who Hates Iowa?" and also "Fuck Clemson"

There have been many on this board arguing that splitting up Michigan and Ohio State is the "most sensible way" to maintain competitive balance in the conference.  I disagree, and I'll point out exactly why here.

Now, Delany and the conference have said multiple times that the criteria for creating the divisions are, in order of importance, (1) Competitive Balance, (2) Maintaining Rivalries, and far off in the background, (3) Geography.  They've also indicated that they are only looking at data since 1993, calling that the "Modern Era" of the Big Ten.

So, onto my divisional splits:

East - Ohio State, Michigan, Penn State, Michigan State, Illinois, Indiana

West - Nebraska, Wisconsin, Iowa, Purdue, Northwestern, Minnesota

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