"New Orleans at Tampa Bay (+4.5) ... RULE OF THUMB: Any time the Saints, Packers, or Patriots are favored by less than a touchdown, just bet them and don't think twice. You'll win more than you lose."

That's an actual sentence, from an actual writer, who writes about actual football. An SB Nation writer, no less.

I love the success, and I love having higher expectations, and I love every minute of not watching games with a bag on my head. But sentences like that still hit me where it counts, in the best way possible. Saints, Packers, or Patriots. That's who we're rolling with.

The last few years have been all sorts of wonderful, haven't they?

Just so I don't jinx us: Malcolm & Cam, will you PLEASE break out in the next few games? Chrissakes, it's like waiting for the end of Inception.

Regardless: Who Dat. Who. F*ing. Dat.

Imma go carve a Fleur de Lis into a pumpkin.

Look, we all hate Kobe here. He shoots us (poorly, on the whole) out of the playoffs, he does that stupid thing with his jaw, he's passive aggressive to his teammates... He's a Laker for chrissakes. Hating Kobe is, at the moment, part & parcel with being a fan of the Nuggets.

But I just wanted to give thanks where they're due: Thanks, Kobe, for shutting down Sager during the All Star game. It's nice to know that, even after the "stupid" comments, you are among those many who can count ourselves as tired of this conversation. This is a tiny, tiny bit of good will coming your way from the Rocky Mountains, so soak it up, because tomorrow we go back to the way it was before, where I wouldn't cross the street to piss on your flaming corpse.

Hey folks. Saints fan here. I joined up because I need the "inside dope" on something.

I'm getting my buddy some custom kicks for his birthday. He is a Broncos fan, and they are going to be totally freaking sweet blue & white with the big orange swoosh. But there's a problem: THEY GET A TAG LINE.

This is, I'll admit, undoubtedly cool. The problem being, I'm not a Broncos fan. Nothin but love, but I'm not a die hard.

My boy is cool, a little hip hop, so I want it to be a chill tag line, maybe sort of obscure in a hip kind of way. You know? Anyways - I get 8 characters of space to write ANYTHING. My best idea so far has been "Doom 92." This is because Elvis is a baller, and it's a bada$$ nickname. Problem is, I'm not sure what his tender situation is at the moment, and I don't want to get my boy a shoe that's out-of-date the second he puts it on.

So I put it to you, loyal and wonderful Broncos fans: Had you 8 characters to put on a dope shoe, what would you put?!?

Any advice is greatly appreciated, and good luck this next season! I'm interested to see how Kitna's heir to Ye Holy Quaterback will turn out.

Can I say it?  ... WHO DAT!

I'm not calling the matchup yet, but it's that time of season again - I can't just head to the Matador or Slabtown to watch the games any more. I need to know where Nuggets fans gather in Portland to watch the games. I'm moving back to Colorado in a month (!!!!!!!!), and I want to spend my final Portland-bound playoff push among my brethren.

Should we actually end up playing the Blazers in round 1: Anyone want to get a group goin to the first game here?

If there isn't already a dedicated spot, let's get one going! My vote is Slabtown. Cheap drinks and plenty of tv's.

Playoff time! Goooo Nuggies!

See, it's trades like this that reaffirm my faith in the basic goodness of humanity:

http://games.espn.go.com/nba/tradeMachine?tradeId=yhu6jvt

Why Orlando goes for it:

   Because Dwight Howard? Really? He needs to just get the hell out of Orlando, with their megachurches and their strip malls. There is lengthy evidence about him butting heads with Stan Van this season - neither likes the attitude of the other. Besides, Howard really isn't all that good. And look! If they acquire KMart, they get +2 in wins! That's the two wins they needed to win the championship! So, by this logic, (Orlando - D12) + KMart = Championship. IT'S MATH, YOU CAN'T ARGUE WITH IT.

Why Philly goes for it:

   Philly is in full firesale mode. They were already trying to dump Iggy, and with their coaching, they need a solid vet like Billups to to guide them out of the bowels of mediocrity into the promised land of salary cap restructuring. Also, Malik Allen is about to go Beast Face all over the league, and this makes them a contender in the east. A backcourt of AI and Billups? Yes please.

Why Denver goes for it:

   There is no reason for Denver to make this trade. Essentially, this would be charity to the other two teams. Jrue sucks, and we'd be giving up our defensive leader and our steady, veteran, superstar point guard. I actually hate this trade for Denver, and I'm sure you'll agree. Dwight Howard? Meh. Iggy? Meh.

Comment Away

Good Lord I want Marc Gasol. Mentioned as a trade/signing option on several Nugg blogs, and boy, I think we can all see why now. He was great tonight.

Gasol/Nene(or Kmart)/Melo/Jr/Billups = Bye, Lakers

Bird/Graham/Naldo/Afflalo/Ty = Who's on your bench? Ha. FAIL.

Gasol/Kmart/Naldo/Afflalo/Billups = 0/25, 0pts

Nene/Melo/Jr/Afflalo/Ty = runrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrunrurun

etc./etc./etc./etc./etc. = So... where do I donate?