SB Nation User Blog: Nico

Rules That Need To Be Changed

Nico — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 02:46:40 -0000

Speaking of umpires, umpires need to enforce the rules rather than either making them up ("No, that's only a strike when the count is 3-0"), inventing them ("Ah, that's the 'neighborhood play' as found in section...um, section...well it's the 'neighborhood play'"), ignoring them ("You have 20 seconds to throw the pitch, Betancourt, and you're now at 18...19...19.5...19.9...19.92...Seriously, throw it soon, ok?"), not noticing them ("No, he's not out unless he's tagged while not on the base. He was? Right in front of me? You don't say!"), or randomly channeling Shakespeare ("Ah, but Mauer, you see: Fair is foul...").

And while we're asking the umpires to enforce the rules, could we make a few of the rules better? Some changes I'd like to see...

* Rule Change #1: You can make two trips to the mound each inning before you must make a pitching change. And this includes the catcher.

This would speed up games and would also force baseball players to play the game like athletes do in every other sport. In basketball, you don't see the point guard drive to the left wing, look at the center posting up, and go, "Hang on, hang on -- hey Andre, Larry, come over here. I think we need to set up a bit differently..." You get a very limited number of timeouts if you want to have those discussions, or you can have them during natural breaks such as free throws, TV timeouts, and strategic mascot decapitations ("Oops, clumsy me! I thought for sure I was firing the ball to my center. Well, as long as there's a break let me chat with my small forward").

In baseball, the catcher puts down signs, the pitcher can shake them off -- if there's true uncertainty about what the signs are, the catcher can use up a trip to the mound to sort things out. Heck, in any given inning the catcher can go out one time and later in the inning the pitching coach can still come out to settle the pitcher down by fondling his ass and pointing out that "go get 'em" is an excellent strategy.

This is a baseball game, not a series of committee meetings. Only in baseball would the shortstop have the nerve to join 3 committee meetings in 10 minutes and never once bring refreshments.

* Rule Change #2: Only the base umpire rules on a check swing.

It is absurd, in my opinion, for the home plate umpire ever to judge a check swing. For him to do so is essentially an admission that he was focused partly on the bat at precisely the time he was supposed to be watching the pitch. Meanwhile, you have someone else who at the moment the pitch crosses the plate, has nothing else to do except watch for a check swing, who is in an excellent position to judge a check swing, and who -- and this is a stroke of good fortune -- happens to be one of the umpires.

Furthermore, why does there need to be an appeal? If a right-handed batter checks his swing and the 1B umpires sees it as a swing, why can't he just indicate that it's a strike? And if not, indicate "no swing." It should be his call, and only his call, and like with every other call in the world, perhaps the umpire whose call it is should just go ahead and -- gee I don't know -- make the call?

All this would save Adrian Beltre a lot of trouble. (Not that you can blame Beltre for trying to preserve any balls he can.)

* Rule "Change" #3: There is no such thing as the "neighborhood play" and no such thing as a "takeout slide."

Leave the "neighborhood play" to Mr. Rogers and leave "takeout" to Chinese food. The former is not necessary without the latter, and the latter is barbaric. Plus, neither actually exists in the spirit -- or language -- of the rules of baseball. You are supposed to get forced runners out by touching the base, not by getting near it, and you are supposed to slide in order to avoid going past the bag, not to disrupt the fielder by maiming him.

Either give the middle infielders a tape measure in order to establish "proximity" as they turn two, and give the baserunner a Bengal tiger in order to assist with the maiming process, or get rid of both conventions that don't actually exist and force both sides to play actual baseball on a DP grounder.

What do you think? And what did I miss?

Tim Lincecum: Putting The "Pot" In "Potpourri"

Nico — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 03:19:33 -0000

More photos » by Ross D. Franklin - AP

Tim Lincecum takes a quick puff while wondering why the on deck circle is walking towards him. If you think Lincecum's glove is levitating up to the baseball, you might be on something too.

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Several assorted items this fine day...Join me after the jump (it's to conclusions -- what a fun ride!) as we talk about many different topics, some of real substance. And I mean that quite literally.

So I wake up in the morning (for a change), pick up the Chronicle Sporting Green, and see the headline, "Lincecum cited for having pot in his car." Now I can relate to this, as I was recently cited for having a casserole dish in the back seat. I have also driven with a crockpot in the passenger's seat (we've since broken up), and also once been in the car when Henry Rodriguez was busted for trying to issue a wok to an undercover leadoff hitter.

Anyhow, it turns out Tim Lincecum was driving 74MPH in a 60MPH zone, was pulled over by a cop who, in a twist of terrible luck for Lincecum, had not lost his sense of smell and asked Lincecum if by any chance he was in possession of marijuana. To which Lincecum apparently replied, "Why yes," and turned over 3.3 grams and a pipe.

Let's count the mistakes, shall we?

1. Lincecum didn't need to drive 74MPH; he could have gone 60MPH and just changed his grip on the steering wheel to get better movement. OK that one's not so serious. We'll start over:

1. When you're carrying marijuana and a pipe, it's generally a bad idea to break other laws and bring attention to your car. 60MPH will still get you places pretty fast.

2. It's an especially bad idea to break laws while breaking laws if you happen to be a famous athlete. No one else was available to transport the dope? It had to be "the one guy who if he's caught it will probably be in the papers the next day"?

3. His hair. I'm just saying, if we're counting mistakes anyway can we throw that one in?

New Sunday Feature Coming: Sunday Funnies!

It's not ANtics; it's more Bizarro-esque. Just for fun, I thought I'd include an original single-panel cartoon with the front page post each Sunday this off-season. For years I created single-panel cartoons, which were then drawn by my most artistic 8th grade students and published in our school newspaper -- and from that came a cartoon book, "Gullible's Travels," that featured some of our favorites redrawn by a couple of our finest young cartoonists.

Generally, the cartoon will have nothing to do with the post, or even with baseball, though for Sunday's debut cartoon I have selected a baseball-themed one to get the ball rolling (so to speak). I just thought it would be a fun, Sundayish thing to look forward to (or dread). So that's the first "special feature" of several I hope/plan to unveil in effort to make the off-season go by a bit quicker.

Random Community Service Opportunity -- And You Don't Have To Do Anything!

This one has the advantage of not requiring you to do anything except entertain me. On Saturday, November 21st, the Alameda County Community Food Bank will have volunteers at 20 CVS locations in Berkeley/Oakland. Volunteers will be handing out flyers and accepting canned food donations in barrels so big even Vlad Guerrero's strike zone is smaller. My school has adopted 2 stores, one in Berkeley and one in Oakland, to handle the volunteering (which will be done by students).

I will be at the Berkeley CVS on Shattuck & Rose from 9:00am-5:00pm on November 21st, supervising students from my school as they do volunteer shifts. My job is basically to make sure that if a stranger tries to lure one of our children into his car, urge the child not to settle for an Almond Joy and to hold out for at least an Almond Roca.

The point is, I will be bored out of my mind unless some of you come keep me company. So you need to do that. Please? It's for a good cause. (Not the Food Bank, me. You folks are way too focused on the hungry.)

Has anyone seen my pants?

Big Huge Changes Coming To AN On Tuesday!!!!!!

Nico — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 17:07:53 -0000

Or maybe it's minor tweaks that you'll barely notice, I'm not sure. Who has time to read these memos carefully?

Scheduled for Tuesday (though as with the cable guy, it could be anytime between 1:00pm-5:00pm and may not in fact show up on Tuesday), AN will undergo what is called a "visual refresh." Presumably it's not much.

However, I'm going to reserve judgment, having endured euphemisms too many times before -- such as my dentist saying, "This may pinch a little" (Translation: "You may hit the ceiling when I hit this nerve") and my principal explaining that the new student "Can be fidgety" (Translation: "Hide your breakables, and don't plan on getting any teaching done while he's in the room").

Not that you should rely on me for sophisticated technological information. Having mastered the On/Off button only last year, I just recently discovered that there's a function -- it's actually a single key on the typing-board thing -- that if you keep it pressed down you can type all the same letters, only they show up capitalized. I know!!!

But my understanding, such that I can have any when it comes to the technological side of life, is that while AN will look "pretty much the same, just not identical" following this visual refresh, among other purposes this is the first step in a project to speed up load time (woo hoo!).

I also wanted to let readers know that I have a series of fun and different features planned for the off-season -- I'll wait until the World Series is over to announce them next weekend -- so I hope folks won't take off directly into hibernation, as I plan for this off-season to be especially filled with new features ranging from "entertaining" to "instructive" to "well that's different!" Stay tuned...

Manuel, Lidge Get What They Deserve: FAIL

Nico — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 04:48:48 -0000

Baseball never fails to astound me, and that includes some of the choices that made in an apparent effort to win. Despite Pedro Feliz' heroic efforts to keep tying the game -- first with a single to make it 2-2 off Sabathia, and then with a dramatic HR to re-tie the game 4-4 with 2 out in the 8th off Joba Chamberlain -- the Phillies seemed determined to put their worst foot forward.

From the beginning, when a game that should have, IMO, been started by Cliff Lee, went instead to Joe Blanton, ensuring that Lee will not pitch thrice in the series -- the only way I foresaw Philly pulling off an upset. Blanton pitched a lot better than the numbers suggest, as he was nickel and dimed to death in the 5th by a well-placed chopper, a seeing eye single, and a flair to right field hit so weakly it hit 3 pigeons and 2 of them didn't even notice.

But Lee should have gotten the call, and on a night when the Phillies' offense had 4 runs in them they might have prevailed behind their ace.

And then there's Brad Lidge, throwing his second best pitch, the fastball, to Alex Rodriguez in the season's most crucial moment to date. Not just a fastball, mind you, a fastball right down the middle with the count 0-1. But the location was probably just an execution mistake. Getting beaten with your second best pitch is what drives managers crazy -- assuming they're not busy messing things up from the beginning themselves.

Maybe Lidge was afraid to bounce a slider with Johnny Damon at 3B. Here's a solution: Cover 3B like you're supposed to and a steal of 2B won't end with the runner at 3B. Here's another solution: Bounce the slider if that's what can get the hitter out. It's the catcher's job to block it.

So now the Yankees are one win away from completing their purchase of a World Series title. Pathetic.

"For The Love Of God!!!" Rally Thread

Nico — Mon, 02 Nov 2009 04:10:53 -0000

4-3 Spoiled Rich Kids going to the bottom of the 8th. Release the gnats! Joba's coming in...

Open Thread: World Series Game 4 - Let's Hope They Tankees at Phillies

Nico — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 23:55:28 -0000

More photos » by Jeff Chiu - AP

"Now it seems so obvious -- I could have had a V-8."

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First of all, when Joe Blanton is your #4 starter you have a very good rotation. And when your ace can pitch on 3-days rest without missing a beat, you have a very good chance of winning the World Series. Such is the stage tonight: Blanton vs. Sabathia, with the Yankees leading the series 2 games to 1, Cliff Lee lined up to pitch Game 5 tomorrow, and tonight's game every bit a "must win" for the Phillies despite the unfavorable matchup.

In 4 career starts against the Yankees, Blanton is 0-3, 8.18 ERA over 22 IP. Interestingly, in those 22 IP Blanton has only allowed 22 hits but has walked 12, which probably speaks to how Blanton pitches differently (i.e., more carefully) to lineups of the Yankees' caliber. We'll see how aggressive Blanton is in the strike zone tonight facing the likes of Teixeira, A-Rod, and The Holy One.

First pitch is scheduled for 5:20PST. Tim McCarver's and Joe Buck's world should make sense again this evening, as it will be November for fans all across the country. Could someone please fire them, kthxbye!

Cole Day In Hell -- Phillies 8-5 Loss Shows Why Manuel Is Crazy Not To...

Nico — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 04:45:48 -0000

...start Cliff Lee in Game 4. Charlie Manuel has announced that Joe Blanton will pitch Game 4, rather than have Lee pitch on 3-days rest for the first time in his career, and then be set to pitch in Game 7. Game 7 is not going to be a problem the way Manuel is playing it.

Down 2-1 in the series, Manuel has two options that don't require Pedro Martinez to pitch on short rest -- which at this stage of his career makes sense not to do. He can go, as he is apparently going to, with:

Lee
P. Martinez
Hamels
Blanton
Lee
P. Martinez
Hamels

and pitch Lee only twice while trying to get to a Game 7 to throw a pitcher who entered tonight's game with a 6.75 post-season ERA and promptly gave up 5 ER in 4.1 IP. After going all of 10-11, 4.32 ERA during the regular season.

Or Manuel could go with:

Lee
P. Martinez
Hamels
Lee
Blanton
P. Martinez
Lee

You see, pitching Blanton is not the problem -- pitch him in Game 5. It's "not pitching Lee three times" that's the problem. In any game where the Yankees and Phillies take the field and Cliff Lee is not pitching, the Yankees are going to be the better team. The only chance the Phillies have in the World Series is to put the better team out there 3 times out of 7 and then try to steal one more.

The way the Phillies are playing it, they will now have to win 3 of 4 the rest of the way, and 2 of those wins will have to come in games Lee doesn't start. Good luck.

Charlie Manuel, had the Phillies won tonight maybe you could gamble because you already had one non-Lee win in the bag. You don't have that. You are now 0-2 when Lee doesn't start and it's not surprising. You have about 20 hours to come to your senses and give your team a chance to win the World Series. Because Lee on short rest may or may not get you there -- but pitching Lee only twice won't, plain and simple.

Open Thread: World Series Game 3 - Yankees at Phillies (cont.)

Nico — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 03:01:18 -0000

More photos » by David Zalubowski - AP

"If you're gonna hang curves, heck I can do that."

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Terrible pitch selection and worse execution have sent Cole Hamels to the showers trailing 5-3 in the top of the 5th.

Open Thread: World Series Game 3 - Yankees at Phillies

Nico — Sat, 31 Oct 2009 18:37:04 -0000

Happy Hallowe'en, everyone! If there was ever any doubt, there is now conclusive proof that I am a pane in the ass.

Tonight, Andy Pettitte goes up against Cole Hamels as the series shifts over to the City of ~~Brotherly Love~~ likely rain. Hopefully, they can get Game 3 in tonight without difficulty. Even if it's raining pretty hard, though, Derek Jeter should have little difficulty as he can always just walk on water. First pitch is scheduled for 4:57PDT. Enjoy daylight savings time while you can!

UPDATE, 5:15pm PDT: The game is in a rain delay with the score Cloudburst 1, National Anthem 0 in the 0th inning. The weather forecast calls for decreasing showers starting within the hour, so it appears likely they will get the game in, in its entirety, tonight, just not yet...

UPDATE, 6:00pm PDT: First pitch is estimated to be at 6:15pm PDT. It's an exciting moment because Derek Jeter will be in the batter's box, existing.

No "Manifest Destiny" In La-La Land: Yankees Eliminate Angels

Nico — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 04:04:26 -0000

More photos » by Kathy Willens - AP

Trainer Gene Mohahan tries to figure out exactly how it is that Derek Jeter can walk on water.

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Final Score: Rich Team That Buys Victories 5, Angels 2.

There were times when it seemed nothing could slow down an Angels team brought together by the death of Nick Adenhart in a season that had already begun with John Lackey, Ervin Santana, and Kelvim Escobar on the DL. Joe Saunders would pitch through pain, Scot Shields would be lost for the season, and Vlad the Impaler would look more and more each day like Vlad the Former Impaler.

No matter. The Angels just kept winning. And winning. And winning. Then they got to the ALCS and forgot how to play baseball. Mike Scioscia, widely considered to be one of baseball's best managers, would make several puzzling moves, including today's choices of sticking with Joe Saunders through thin and thin -- Saunders wobbled through every inning and never came close to getting it together -- and trying Scott "Let me try 25 pitches this inning and see if a few of them are good" Kazmir in a 3-2 game, while Jered Weaver -- he of precisely the breaking stuff the Yankees couldn't handle all series -- sat, and sat, and sat.

Not how I would have played it, but then again I would have caught Matsui's pop up, I would have taken the out at first on Melky Cabrera's ground ball, I would have thrown a bunt nearer to a base than to the malt vendor.

BREAKING NEWS!!!! Derek Jeter has just sneezed. Fox will have the full story right after Tim McCarver says something inane. So that would be right now. Good effing grief, people.

Bye bye, Angels. Go Phillies!