SB Nation User Blog: Nofatmike

Let the airing of grievances commence!

Nofatmike — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 23:19:17 -0000

As many of you know, today is Festivus, a day when all of us come together to express how each and everyone of us has disappointed each other in the past year. Since 2005, as a way of celebrating the holiday without offending anyone, each year I discuss how the Dodgers have disappointed me each year. And as Dodger fans, you all know they do a lot to disappoint us each year. So here I share for you the members of the Dodgers organization who have disappointed me in 2009/

Jonathon Broxton: So let me get this straight, you can turn Albert Pujols, the greatest hitter in the game right now, into Andruw Jones, but somehow pitching to Matt Stairs and his .194 batting average turns you into Brett Tomko? Explain that please.

James Loney: Triple-slash line for 2009: .281/.357/.399 with 13 home runs. That would be decent if you were a starting shortstop. Unfortunately you're our starting first baseman, and you're proving my point that 2007 was an anomally.

George Sherill: We acquired you for Josh Bell. We acquired because you're good against lefties. We acquired you because you kill lefties. We acquired you because most of the Phillies lineup is composed of lefties. We acquired you because we would likely face the Phillies on the way to the world series. We acquired you to get to the World Series. So in a sense, we traded Josh Bell on the suspicion that you would get us to the World Series. And so what do you do against the first 3 Phillies you face in the postseason? Walk, walk, home run, on our way to a 5-game defeat. We traded Josh Bell for nothing.

Russell Martin: Triple-slash line for 2009: .250/.352/.329. Now for a catcher that's not as atrocious as it looks. However, it's extremely atrocious when compared to this: .290/.413/.530. That's Carlos Santana's line for Akron.

Casey Blake: Triple-slash line for 2009: .280/.363/.468 with good defense. So why are you on this list? Oh right, .290/.413/.530 for Carlos Santana in Akron.

Chad Billingsley: Dear Chad, you may or may not know this but I am one of your biggest fans. Ever since you got called up in 2006, I've told everyone how you would become the next great Dodger ace. I have cheered for you during all your highs and stood up for you through all your lows. In a way, I feel like Pedro Cerrano to your Jobu, taking the heat for you from all the lazy Eddie Harris-like sportswriters and fans want to run you out of town for not being the lord and savior Roy Halladay. But it seems like whenever things are going good (like when you're on your way to pitching a shutout, getting out of a jam, or your on your way to a Cy Young season) and my faith in you is justified, you somehow throw me a curveball that lands me flat on my ass and has me defending you from all the naysayers all over again. So in 2010, I'm giving you yet another chance, and if you put together a great season, my faith in you will be redeemed. But if you don't Chad, don't be surprised if you hear me saying this at some point next season: "Look, I go to you. I stick up for you. You no help me now. I say "Fuck you," Chad, ...I'll root for Scott Elbert."

Manny Ramirez: Really? You take a women's fertility drug because of "personal health issues?" You'd better be pregnant by now or I'd say your doctor gave you the wrong stuff.

Jamie McCourt: So you wanted us to think that signing a superstar outfielder would prevent you from building 50 little league baseball fields? Well maybe if you hadn't bought four mansions and were flying your new boyfriend to Taiwan on a "business trip" maybe the Dodgers could afford both. Or perhaps they could offer arbitration to departing players, or give bonuses to unsigned draft picks, or acquire mid-season rotation help, or give not give up highly-touted prospects in every trade the Dodgers make. Look, I don't mind it when people live off their wealth when they've earned it, in fact I encourage it. But what I don't like is when people who insist on living off their wealth scream poverty and act like a victim when things don't go their way. And I have even less sympathy for them when they act like their business is a charity as a result of that. If you want to act like Mother Teresa you'd better BE Mother Teresa.

Frank McCourt: Seriously, did you max out all of your Visa cards just to buy this team? I didn't realize that Fannie Mae gave out sub-prime mortgages to baseball teams as well. Perhaps I could've applied...

Bud Selig: So the McCourt's are financially sound enough to buy the Dodgers, huh? It's hard to look past the fact that this might have something to do with deflating player's salaries when Mark Cuban is denied ownership while Jeffery Loria gets to destroy a second franchise. With the way things have been going, while everybody's hoping the next owner might be Eli Broad, I wouldn't put it past you to put Bruce McNall in charge.

And lastly, the 2009 Los Angeles Dodgers: You win 95 games, the most you've ever won since the year I was born. You were in first place since the 9th game of the season. Best record in the National League, and you 99 wins on your Pythag. record to prove that it wasn't a fluke. And yet despite all of that, you still can't get into the World Series? What does this team have to do to win another World Series in my lifetime, reincarnate the entire 1927 Yankees and put them on the 40-man roster? Do you know how long it's been since you've won anything? 21 years. That means fans that were born after the last championship are now old enough to legally drown their misery in whiskey (if they haven't been doing so already). So please, I beg of you, win something in 2010, because after next season I get the feeling I'll be writing these "grievances" a lot more often.

Best Dodger Team Ever from 1989-2008

Nofatmike — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 22:11:13 -0000

On BBTF, commenters tried to come make up with an All-Star team of Pirate players from 1993 to 2009 that would compete for the division title (since the Pirates haven't had winning season since 1992). On that note, I thought it would be interesting to come up with a "team" of Dodger players from 1989 to 2008 that would do the same. I went on BBref and selected players who either had a minimum of 400 plate appearances for position players, 120 innings for starting pitchers, and 40 appearances for relievers. There are no repeats, meaning if a starting pitcher or a reliever had more than one really good season I selected the highest one and went on to the next pitcher. Also, if a position player or a pitcher has the same OPS+ in multiple seasons (as in the case of Brett Butler and Shawn Green), I went with the one that had the most plate appearances or innings/appearances. Here's my team:

C Mike Piazza 185 OPS+ 1997

1B Eddie Murray 158 OPS+ 1990

2B Jeff Kent 133 OPS+ 2005

SS Jose Offerman 112 OPS+ 1995

3B Adrian Beltre 163 OPS+ 2004

LF Gary Sheffield 176 OPS+ 2000

CF Brett Butler 130 OPS+ 1992

RF Shawn Green 154 OPS+ 2001

Rotation

Hideo Nomo 150 ERA+ 1995

Orel Hershiser 148 ERA+ 1989

Ismael Valdez 146 ERA+ 1997

Brad Penny 151 ERA+ 2007

Kevin Brown 169 ERA+ 2000

Bullpen

Jay Howell 217 ERA+ 1989

Takashi Saito 327 ERA+ 2006

Joe Beimel 210 ERA+ 2008

Paul Quantrill 231 ERA+ 2003

Eric Gagne 335 ERA+ 2003

Notes: I was kind of hoping Chad Billingsley's 2007 would make it on here just to silence the doubters, however seeing Brad Penny and Ismael Valdez on here is a bit of a surprise. Also a shock: no one from the 1991 or 2002 teams made the list despite being two of the three most winningest seasons since 1988, yet a player each from the 1992 and 2005 teams did.

Players from this year that have a good shot of making this team:

Matt Kemp 127 OPS+ (needs 131)

Clayton Kershaw 145 ERA+ (needs 147)

Players that would have to haul-ass to make it:

Manny Ramirez 155 OPS+ (needs 177)

Ronald Belisario 202 ERA+ (needs 211)

Andre Ethier 132 OPS+ (needs 155)

Randy Wolf 130 ERA+ (needs 147)

It'll be interesting to see if, by the end of the year, I'll have to update this team. Then again, I'm kind of hoping I won't have to...

The Countdown Begins!

Nofatmike — Fri, 04 Sep 2009 01:18:22 -0000

With the Giants losing 2-1 to the Phils today, the Dodgers' number to clinch a spot in the playoffs is now 20. With 28 games left in the season, any combination of 20 Dodger wins or Giants (or whoever is second in the wild-card) automatically gives them a playoff berth. As for the division, with Colorado's loss to the Mets today, the magic number to clinch the division is now 24. For more info on magic numbers click here.

Diamondbacks vs Dodgers coverage

No "spark" needed.

Nofatmike — Sat, 05 Jul 2008 03:17:27 -0000

Ever since their lead-off man, Juan Pierre, has gone on the Disabled List a few days ago, the Dodgers have since gone 4-1 over a 5-game span and now trail (as of this moment) the 1st-place D'Backs by a game in the NL West. And while Pierre has been out of the lineup in that timespan, the much-maligned Dodgers offense has suddenly hit a resurrgance despite their "self-proclaimed" spark-plug spending that entire period on the DL. This begs a question of my own; how exactly has the offense faired with and without Juan Pierre? Here's what I found (courtesy of baseball-reference.com):

Games in which Pierre started: 3.806 R/G (67 games)
Games in which Pierre did not start: 5.421 (19 games)
Games in which Pierre played: 3.726 (73 games)
Games in which Pierre did play: 6.615 (13 games)
Games in which Pierre lead-off: 3.3 (50 games)
Games in which Pierre did not lead-off: 5.361 (36 games)

While the correlation of high-scoring games during Pierre's absence does not imply that he is the main cause of the Dodgers' offensive woes, the Dodgers are surely doing a better job without their "spark-plug."