SB Nation User Blog: Porcus

BOOTY NOW!

Porcus — Tue, 02 Sep 2008 01:52:46 -0000

BOOTY NOW!

Dutton say: Kila, Shealy, Booty, Devon Lowery, Yimmy, and John Bale make their triumphant voyage to KC.

KILA NOW!

Porcus — Mon, 01 Sep 2008 20:29:08 -0000

KILA NOW!

Minda with the scoop. No worries, Shealy, I'm sure Trey can make you an outfielder or something. He's good at doing less with more!

HOLY CRAP, TREY! This might just be the KC Star Horrible Pixelated Photo of the Year. Some trick...

Porcus — Thu, 07 Aug 2008 06:40:32 -0000

HOLY CRAP, TREY! This might just be the KC Star Horrible Pixelated Photo of the Year. Some trick of photography makes it appear as though Trey's knuckleballing arm is about to consume us all.

Offday 8 Open Thread - BORINGBORINGBORINGBORING

Porcus — Thu, 26 Jun 2008 22:23:27 -0000

What do you do on offdays? Me, I stare at the blank TV, feeling desperate. I might go catch an Omaha Royals game, if they're in town. But they're definitely not in town today.

Yup. Sure is boring around here.

Now I have adapted the conclusion of Puccini's Turandot to offdays:

Offday!

Night! Death! Nihility!

Darkness of this world and hate!

We mourn and lament with song in the dark,

our great sorrow!

Curses to thee! Curses! Curses!

Offday 7 Open Thread - I've Never Been More Bored In My Entire Life

Porcus — Tue, 17 Jun 2008 02:00:49 -0000

O Offday, like the moon you are changeable, ever waxing and waning;

hateful life first oppresses and then soothes as fancy takes it,

poverty and power: it melts them like ice.

Offday - monstrous and empty, you whirling wheel,

you are malevolent, well-being is in vain and always fades to nothing,

shadowed and veiled you plague me too;

now through the game I bring my bare back to your villainy.

Offday is against me in health and virtue,

driven on and weighted down, always enslaved.

So at this hour without delay, pluck the vibrating strings;

since Offday strikes down the strong man,

everyone weep with me!

Offday Imperatrix Mundi