SB Nation User Blog: ProfessorBigelow

Caption This: Week 4 Domination

ProfessorBigelow — Tue, 06 Oct 2009 16:37:05 -0000

So with all this Craptree stuff going on, I thought it would be nice to remember, "Oh, we dominated this weekend. We are one of the best teams in the NFL... Kick ass!" What better way to celebrate a victory than a good ol-fashioned Caption This? No better way, that's right.

I apologize for missing last week's Caption This; I was too disheartened by that Vikings loss, and with my computer heading to the great hard-drive in the sky, it was tough to get my way to NN. But now the world is right again, Bamm Bamm and the Niners D dominated, the Rams are back at the bottom of the NFC West, and the Niners have a winning record. Nice.

This week, Fearless Leader Samurai Mike Singletary finds something quite funny. I leave the rest to you Nation. Remember, I'm keeping record of wins during the regular season. Howtheyscored won the week 1 contest, and SeBaz49 won the closest Caption This EVER in week 2, squeaking out a victory by 2% with his shout out to Cast Away. Kudos SeBaz, kudos. Who will step up for Week 4?

Remember the rules, post your best caption for the photo above in the comments, then go back and Rec your favorite comments. Those with the most Rec's will make the final voting round. Cut-off for final voting will be tomorrow at midnight (pacific). Winner, as always, gets supreme internet kudos, but these kudos actually count, since it's the regular season.

Caption This NN!

Focus On: Rams @ Niners

ProfessorBigelow — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 12:17:46 -0000

Well, this has been a rough week. I still feel like I'm catching [site decorum] from my friends thanks to Brett [site decorum], that piece of [site decorum]. Add onto that a Mac laptop with a shattered screen, two tests, two papers and a dead pet gecko, and this has ranked among the worst single-weeks of all time for me. But that won't stop me from reaching you Nation (for better or worse).

I must pass along thanks though to the NFL schedule makers for putting the Rams right after the Vikings. I don't want to assume a win, but needless to say I feel pretty confident about the Niners chances here. I'm in kind of a rush to get to my alma mater's homecoming weekend, but here is a list of things you, as a Niners fan, should focus on during this weekends (hopefully) spirit-lifting match up.

Key Matchup: 49ers D-Line vs. Steven Jackson

It's not hiding that Steven Jackosn is the main (if not only) weapon the Rams have, so stopping him from getting out of control is the biggest key to victory, in my eyes. While Jackson hasn't been too much of a beast lately (just ask my fantasy team), he always is a threat for a Frank Gore-like 80 yard TD run. Of course, to pull something like that off, he'll have to get past Ray McDonald and the 49ers front four. If the big men up front can push the somewhat weak St. Louis O-line a yard or two back off the line of scrimmage, Jackson's maneuverability will be severely limited. If they can get him to dance in the backfield, be sure the Niners will be tackling him for a loss; he isn't that elusive.

After the jump, Player to Watch, Player to Loath, Fantasy Surprise/Sleeper, and more info on the third divisional matchup in 4 weeks...

Player to Watch: Glen Coffee

With Gore on the bench, the load of the running game falls onto the broad shoulders of Hot-Pot-Of-Coffee. He did OK last week (54 yards on 25 rushes), especially considering that he was against what might be the best running D we will see all year. Since Jimmy Raye (WHO?!?!?!) has informed the entire NFL that the Niners will run the ball non-stop, no matter what other teams throw at us (more or less), we will need Coffee to step up and do some work for us.

Player to Loath: Richie Incognito

Not going to lie, I've never liked this guy. Even though he is Jersey born, and he was/is good at his position, he knows it. He's got an ego the size of the gateway arch, and that sometimes its a detriment to the Rams as a whole. He brings stupid penalties on himself because of the temper tantrums he throws on the field and on the sidelines. So why would I loath a guy because he gives the Niners yards you ask? Because usually those penalties are personal fouls or unsportsmanlike conducts, impacting, insulting or harming the opposing team. If that [site decorum]-head injures someone else on the Niners, I don't care how many yards we get in return, I'll want his head.

To be completely honest, there's no-one on the Rams I really hate, since they haven't been the same team since the Warner-Holt-Bruuuce-Faulk years, so Incogneto is a bit of a reach. But if you are one of those guys that NEEDS to hate someone on the opposing team, consider the bulls-eye set.

Fantasy Superstar: Vernon Davis

We've made it. After a week like last week we know VD has the power and ability that we thought he has had all season. While I'm not willing to say he's an every-week starter, I seriously doubt the ability of the Rams to stop him from running/blocking/hitting/scoring at will. I'm really hoping he has finally broken through for good, since I have him on every single one of my fantasy teams. I'd say if you have him, start him - he's one of the best bets for sure points.

Fantasy Sleeper: Issac Bruce

If the running game isn't working too well, expect to see the passing game step up against one of the worst passing D's I have ever seen. And who better to tear apart the Rams secondary than a former Ram himself? The Reverend has been hot/cold the past few weeks, and didn't get his first catch last week til the 4th quarter, but this week matches up well for him. I expect him to contribute to the constant-squirming that Crabtree is undergoing with each passing week.

I'm running late and gotta bolt, so for the history of this matchup, checkout the Prospector's Guide. GO NINERS

Caption This: Reg Season Week 2 Voting

ProfessorBigelow — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 18:02:29 -0000

More photos » by Marcio Sanchez - AP

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Here you go! Vote Away!

Poll

What is the best caption for the photo above?

San Francisco 49ers’ cornerback Nate Clements struggles to hold back Seattle wide receiver Nate Burleson when Burleson suddenly lapses into a post-traumatic wartime flashback in which Dashon Goldson was killed by a grenade. "It’s just a football!" Clement

50 votes

Nate Clements was overheard consoling Nate Burleson during the above play, "There, there, Nate, it’s over. Let it go, just let it go. It’s in better hands now."

109 votes

Burleson: Oh [site decorum] that’s not Mark Roman! That ball’s gonna be intercepted for sure!

173 votes

Burleson: Willllsssoooooonnnnnn!!!!!!

188 votes

Clements and Burleson impress Dashon Goldson who could not stop clapping. The first male-male figure skating tandem showed off their skill on the fotball field last sunday.

45 votes

GET TO DA CHOPPA!!!!

127 votes

692 votes | Poll has closed

Caption This Ends Soon!

ProfessorBigelow — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 03:59:48 -0000

Caption This Ends Soon!

Go get your last-second entries in, and Rec the best ones. Cut-off @ 12 midnight Pacific!

Caption This: Reg Season Week 2

ProfessorBigelow — Mon, 21 Sep 2009 19:27:39 -0000

More photos » by Marcio Sanchez - AP

(AP Photo/Marcio Sanchez)

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Well... Let's see if I can follow THAT up...

Describe to me a mid-September day that could get better. Exclusive interview with NN from Steve Young, after our second division win in a row, and I go 3-0 in pay fantasy leagues? Very nice! Thank you 49ers, now I can be less facetious when I celebrate the fact that we are UNDEFEATED! I hope you are all still pleased with the performance this Sunday, and while there are still some obvious areas that need improvement, we finally look like a team out there. Now that is something I haven't seen since the Wild-Card victory over the Giants during the Mooch era.

I do have one small thing to get to before the captioning. In my most recent Focus On article, I dropped the following line:

Now, I'm not saying I want to see Matt Hasselbeck injured, but IF Patrick Willis were to break his jaw, I wouldn't be disappointed in the lack of new Hasselbeck commercials.

Of course, I'm not arrogant enough to believe that my comment caused Willis to injure Hass's back, but I was not-at-all pleased to see the Seattle QB unable to finish the game. It doesn't show as much to have a victory against a team at 80% capacity vs completely healthy. I feel your pain (so to speak) Seattle fans, and I truly hope Matty-Boy gets back on the field ASAP - a healthy Hasslebeck makes your team, and thereby the NFC West as a whole, a-lot tougher.

Aaaaand moving on to happier news, the best way to put a nice little bow on top of this back-to-back-victory-celebration is a CaptionThis, right? The photo above is of the split second prior to Dashon Goldson's interception, with "Slippery" Nate Burleson reaching out in agony, and "Lock-down" Nate Clements doing the coverage on Burleson (BTW - How good was Clements this weekend? It seemed like he was in on every other play the defense made). See the replay here to get a good idea of how bang-bang the play was, and how dirty this picture really is.

I've decided this thing needs a competitive element installed, so I'm keeping tally of the regular season Caption This winners. Winner gets the title of most creative mother [site decorum]er at Niners Nation. howtheyscored is in the regular-season lead with last weeks victory, being as is last week was the first regular season Caption This. Let's see if he makes another witty caption for the picture above, or if someone else steps up... Remember the rules, post your best caption for the photo above in the comments, then go back and Rec your favorite comments. Those with the most Rec's will make the final voting round. Cut-off for final voting will be tomorrow at midnight (pacific). Winner, as always, gets supreme internet kudos, but these kudos actually count, since it's the regular season.

So, Nation, for the second, victorious time this regular season... CAPTION THIS!

Focus on: Seahawks @ 49ers

ProfessorBigelow — Fri, 18 Sep 2009 20:33:21 -0000

More photos » by Paul Connors - AP

Recognizing his own awesomeness, San Francisco 49ers’ running back Frank Gore tries to hug himself in a mirror. (AP Photo/Paul Connors, Caption/howtheyscored)

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Another big division match-up is upon us Nation. This week the Seahawks come to the 'Stick, and we plan to stick it to them (get it???). First of all business... Congrats to howtheyscored for winning the CaptionThis contest with the gem above. Amusing, and true; Frank Gore oozes awesomeness. Also, for the Niners Nation 3 fantasy league, yours truly and my team, The Ed Hochuli Gun Show, is in first place in Division 1, while Shulkdog's landsharks leads division two, after dominating victories by each team. 49erLou is in deaaaaad last, only scoring 55 points. Ouch...

OK now time to focus. One bird down, one to go. This is a very exciting match up that I pray plays out the way we are all hoping. Now, I'm a bit disappointed in the lack of trash talking between Field Gulls and NN - wayy too much dwelling on the Rams victory for FG, and a bit too much focus on Crabtree for NN. We have an amazing matchup here people!! Just look below at these amazing match-ups and players to Focus On:

Key Match-up: 49ers O-Line vs Seahawks D-Line

Last week we witnessed the 49ers struggle to get a real running game started with Frank Gore. Glen Coffee was thrown in there to mix it up once or twice, but a lack-of-run-O was not from a fault in the RB's, it was the O-Line not doing their job. Chilo Rachal and Adam Snyder looked lost at time, especially once the AZ DE's got past them and to Gore. Joe Staley and David Bass weren't impressive either, and it will take a dramatic improvement from all four to get this "Run-First"/"Gore-centric"/60-40 running-passing style team to a victory.

Their challenge will not be simple as they will be going face to face with the Seattle D-Line, including good strength and talent from Patrick Kerny, and Cory Redding from the DE positions. It also won't just be their front four - expect to see Lofa Tatupu and their first-round pick Aaron Curry attempting to cause chaos on one side of the line so that someone slips-through unnoticed, a common event in last weeks Niners game.

In the end, I'm confident in the ability the Niners have on their O-Line, and feel like they SHOULD be able to slow down the Seattle D enough to let Frank the Tank do his magic work. However, the Niners never stop surprising me (for better or worse) and we could be walking into a sack-lunch (num-num-num-num). Unlikely as I see it, but possible given the Seattle talent.

After the jump: Player to Watch, Player to Loath, Fantasy Superstar/Sleeper, and some more SF/Seattle Prep..

Player to watch: Vernon Davis

This is an easy one for this game. The last time VD played Seattle in SF he was kicked off the field by Coach Singletary in the 3rd quarter. If I were VD, I would be out for blood - I would want to prove that no-one puts baby in the corner and gets away with it. If he truly is the "NEW AND IMPROVED" VD, then he should be Shaun Hill's #1 passing option in this game. Short dump off passes over the middle, allowing VD to lay into some Seattle LBs, put a hurting on their D, or just simply run away from them all. If VD wants to show that those Under Armour commercials meant something, today is his best opportunity to step out of the shadow that is un-sportsmanship (is that a word?) and step out as one of the 49ers captains and leaders on the field.

Player to loathe: Matt Hasselbeck

This is another unreasonable personal bias that I have about a division QB (you're next Bulger...). I've always seen Hasselbeck as a decent QB, but an exceptional game-manager at best. When Seattle went to the Super Bowl, it was Shaun Alexander, not Hasselbeck, that was the bedrock of the offense. And yet we get to see the Seattle QB in countless, awful commercials that just make me feel sick. Chunky Soup - Matt Hasselbeck is not tough. EAS Myoplex, that "Now I'm Done" line is the most douch-chilling line in all of sports commercials, and Hasselbeck sounds like he's going to be late for his Pokemon-card battle in the commercial. I will never, ever use Expedia because of the two worst commercials ever made, here and here. Oh, and his brother is AWFUL on ESPN (Unrelated? Yes. Untrue? Hell no). Now, I'm not saying I want to see Matt Hasselbeck injured, but IF Patrick Willis were to break his jaw, I wouldn't be disappointed in the lack of new Hasselbeck commercials.

Fantasy Superstar?

This week is tough. I'm unsure about how the Niners front O-line will play, so I'm hesitant to chose Gore. While Issac Bruce had a huge 50-yard catch, its hard to pick with any certainty which WR (if any) will be the main target this week. On the Seattle side of the ball, Hasselbeck can sling it around, but a not over-talented WR corps, with an aging Deon Branch, an over-hyped "Slippery" Nate Burleson and a "I'm an amazing #2, and a halfway-decent #1" T.J Houshamazilly, may hold Hasselbeck back. That being said, I'll have to go with the player who has the best potential of making that one-play, 12 point play that wins a week for you, so T.J.Houshmandzadeh, the honor is yours.

Fantasy Surprise?

I'm going to go with the Niners D. Seattle did drop a 28-spot on the Rams last week, but our D held the much-vaunted AZ Offense to just 16 points! It seems like Sing has got this group firing on all cylinder, and if they can get in Hasselbeck's face they can squeeze out a few sacks, or even turn-overs out of the "Pro-Bowl QB". Would I start them this week? It would depend on the other D's on your roster/on waiver wire, but unless you have a Pittsburgh/Philadelphia/Baltimore/Tennessee/NYG/Minnesota on your team, you should feel ok starting the Niners D.

And to top it all off, some random Seattle/SF facts:

The Niners and Cardinals have only met 20 times in their history (since Seattle was in the AFC West until the NFL re-aligned their teams in 2002 with the addition of the Houston Texans. Seattle holds a 11-9 lead in the all-time series.
The Niners have never shut-out the Seahawks. Seattle has done it twice (the last one being in 2007).
Remember when Jim Mora Jr. was our D Coordinator? The man is now the HC in Seattle, taking over for Mike Holmgren. I've always liked him, but now I have to hate him. Sorry Jim. But don't worry, you still had a hand in creating the greatest after-game post conference in NFL history in 2001, at the expense of the 40-21 beat down you helped apply to your Dad and the Indianapolis Colts.
The Niners have won five of their past six games. Four of those wins are wins earned after we were eliminated from playoff contention last year, but still, I like seeing trends.

Looking a bit ahead...

Don't get injured guys, next week vs. Minnesota is a HUGE game where we may test how good this team is outside the NFC West. But first thing's first - get to 2-0!

GO NINERS!

Caption This! Voting: Week 1

ProfessorBigelow — Thu, 17 Sep 2009 19:34:07 -0000

More photos » by Paul Connors - AP

(AP Photo/Paul Connors)

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Alright ladies and gents - Voting Time! Vote for your favorite caption for the picture above. The winner will be declared Saturday Night/Sunday morning. Massive Kudos at stake here. Game on!!

Poll

Which of the following is the best caption for the picture above?

An element of the new/old uniforms that was not thoroughly thought out was the addition of velcro numbers.

109 votes

Not pictured, Darnell Dockett shoving Chilo Rachal into Frank Gore for a 3 yard loss on the run.

87 votes

Mr. Gore, live long and prosper.

64 votes

Recognizing his own awesomeness, San Francisco 49ers’ running back Frank Gore tries to hug himself in a mirror.

153 votes

Frank Gore found a way to kill the spider on Rachal’s chest without getting "gross bug guts" on his gloves.

71 votes

484 votes | Poll has closed

Caption This! Reg. Season Week 1 Style

ProfessorBigelow — Tue, 15 Sep 2009 04:01:25 -0000

More photos » by Paul Connors - AP

Caption This! returns with a BANG. Put your best stuff right here! (AP Photo/Paul Connors)

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You know what feels great? Mondays after a win. Instead of sulking around, getting [site decorum] from all my "friends" such as "Ahh, Niners lost again? At least you're used to it!" and "Wow those Niners are bad, why do you still root for them?" I get to strut around, wearing my brand-new Frank Gore jersey, happy as hell that my team (along with 1/2 of the NFL) is UNDEFEATED! Who cares about money-grubbing WRs and depressing stuff like that? 1-0 Baby!!

Let's continue this celebration juuuuust a little bit longer, because it's about time to focus completely on the Seattle Sea[site decorum]s. And to, more or less, close out this weekend of celebration, why not put a nice visual bow on top of this present with a brand new Caption This!

I know I put an old Caption This up with no voting round, but it wasn't that good of a picture anyways. THIS one, now this is a gem... To give everyone a little bit of background, that is Frank Gore and Chilo Rachal celebrating the go-ahead touchdown in the 4th quarter. A bit of different rules for the regular season, post your best caption for the photo above in the comments, then go back and Rec your favorite comments. Those with the most Rec's will make the final voting round. Cut-off for final voting will be tomorrow at midnight (pacific). Winner, as always, gets supreme internet kudos, but these kudos actually count, since it's the regular season (sorry all you old Caption This! winners)

So, Nation, for the first time this regular season... CAPTION THIS!

Focus on: 49ers v. Cardinals...

ProfessorBigelow — Fri, 11 Sep 2009 00:56:28 -0000

More photos » by Chris Park - AP

Coach SIngletary knows what to look out for on Sunday, do you? (AP Photo/Chris Park)

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Hey Nation! Long time no talk! I've kind of gone into hiding lately because of the beginning of grad school at Villa-no-fun. But FINALLY things have slowed down enough for me to begin writing here at NN on a regular basis, and just in time too. In juuuuust about 50 hours from the time this post goes up, the Niners will be taking the field vs the hated Cards.

So in this, the longest Friday EVER, I'm here to give all of you the easy reference for this weekend's match-up. I'll be analyzing key matchups, meaningful historical encounters, players to watch, yada yada yada. So lets do this:

Key Match-up: 49ers CBs vs Cardinals WRs

If you are playing fantasy football, you should know that this is the first time in a while that there has been a WR that is not only dangerous enough, but consistent enough, to be drafted early in the first round, and thats Larry Fitzgerald. No need to describe his accolades and accomplishments further here. Combine him with a seemingly-less-disgruntled-with-his-contract Anquan Boldin, and you have one of, if the most, potent WR tandems in the NFL today. Why are they so good? Simple; Y-A-C (or yards after catch). Fitz and Bolden can shake tackles, or break-away from the other 21 players on the field by emptying the NOS tanks and serving CB's a plate full of dust for them to dine on. Steve Breaston is another WR the Niners can not afford to overlook because of great wheels and better hands.

That being said, we shift to the Niners back D: Nate Clements has yet to live up to that contract but has seen this offensive tandem before. Dre Bly is also extremely familiar with the Card's WR's as well as the man throwing them the rock, Kurt Warner (The two won a Super Bowl together in 1999, and went to another one two years later). The big "Receding Hair-Line Accelerator" is Shawntae Spencer at right CB. The plus - his size (6'1" - 190 lbs) will help him keep up with the pretty tall Fitz (6'3" - 217 lbs) and Boldin (6'1" - 217 lbs), compared to the slightly smaller Bly (5'10" - 188 lbs) and Clements (6'0" - 205lbs).

Injury wise, Boldin is coming off of a hamstring "tweak" from the preseason and hasn't practiced in a few weeks, but according to him he should be good to go Sunday. The edge definately lies with the Cards here. I mean, their WR corps (core? ha) is the main reason why they did so well last season, and why they are predicted to do so well this season. Needless to say, if nothing else this will be trial-by-fire for Shawntae, and if you want to see whether Manusky and Singletary made a good decision starting this man, we will learn Sunday.

After the jump: Player to Watch, Player to Loath, Fantasy Superstar/Sleeper, and some more SF/AZ Prep...

Player to watch: Shaun Hill

Well Shaun, here's your chance. You had an "open and fair QB competition" this preseason (wink wink) against Alex Smith, and you came out on top. You are the man in SF, as long as you keep doing what you've been doing as a Niner (7-3 as a starter, with a 90.5 QB rating). It took til your 4th season to play a down in the NFL, til your 6th to throw an NFL pass, and now your 8th to start a season opener. That being said, this is only the second time you will have faced the Cardinals as a starter (the first one being that god-forsaken MNF loss last year... Don't worry I'm getting to that), and your 4th starting game against the NFC West (2-1 record). This is the time to show all the haters that you are no journeyman, and you are the best "game manager" since the 2000 version of Trent Dilfer.

Player to loathe: Kurt Warner

Ok... It might be me, but are there any other Niner fans out there that HAAAAAATE Kurt Warner? Let me spell it out for you. First, statistically why he sucks: Warner is 9-1 against the Niners during his career. In those games he threw 23 TDs, 10 INTs, and had a QB rating of 102.7. Damn. Oh, and all of those games have been as a Ram or Cardinal. Double damn.

Now, emotionally why he sucks: This summer, Warner played "just-the-tip" with the Niners franchise. Kurt wanted a nice, fat contract from the Cards following a SB season, and the two-year, $20 million wasn't enough for him. So he decided to flirt a bit with the rival Niners. He came, he saw, he got a contract offer, and then took the Niners company jet back to AZ to sign with the Cards for $23 million. The Niners were used like a box of Kleenex at an orgy; quickly and sloppily.

I hope Patrick snaps him in two...

Fantasy Superstar?

By Superstar, I essentially mean who will be getting the most fantasy points in this matchup, and here its a simple question between Frank Gore and Larry Fitzgerald. While Larry is the deep threat, capable of a 12-fantasy-point play at any point in time, Frank is wound up and ready to be unleashed in the Raye offense methinks. Jimmy won't make the Marzian mistake of not giving Frank the Tank the ball on the goal-line, and I think that results in 2 or 3 TD's (the optimist in me is coming out...).

Fantasy Surprise?

By Surprise, I mean who will gain a lot of points, seemingly, out of nowhere. For this game, how about Josh Morgan? Morgan looked OK during the pre-season, and with a certain #10 pick watching this game from home, will be getting a lot more touches than expected 2 months ago. Starting across from a talented (albeit aging) Issac Bruce, he might not garner the attention he deserves, and that could be dangerous for AZ. I wouldn't necessarily start the man as your #1 WR, but I would definitely have to think about it as a #2, #3 or Flex player.

Oh, and don't forget...

November 10th, 2009. Monday Night Football in Arizona. The game that has lived in infamy. We all know the story, Niners driving with the clock winding down to the end of the game, down by five. In the closing seconds the Niners get to the 2.5 yard line, and instead of using our starting, all-pro running back Frank Gore, some "Offensive Genius" decided it was a good idea to put Michael Robinson in, resulting in a Zero yard run, and a loss.

If everything else that season stayed the same (hypothetically), the Niners and Cardinals would end the season with 8-8 records each, and the Niners would have split the season series with the Cards. The Cards would still have won the division with a better division record (5-1 vs 4-2 for the Niners), but mayyyyyyyybe the team can't get over the dramatic loss, maybe they lose one more game, maybe the Niners eek out one more victory (say, against the Dolphins) with the increased confidence and make the playoffs. I don't think I will ever get over that crappy play, but hell, why not use it as motivation for the future?

And to top it all off, some random AZ/SF facts:

The Niners and Cardinals have met 35 times dating alll the wayyy back to 1951 with San Fran holding a 19-16 lead in the all-time series. However, since Arizona joined the NFC West, the series is tied 7-7.
Over the past ten meetings between SF and AZ, the average margin of victory is just 6.7 points. Three games went into overtime and only two of the games have been decided by more than one score (both won by AZ).
In six of the past seven seasons (the exception being last season) one team has swept the season series.

Looking a bit ahead...

I know no-one should be looking ahead, but in the first four weeks of the season the Niners have three NFC West games (this one, Next week vs Seattle, and week four vs St. Louis). Biig stretch coming up...

It should be an interesting opening game. Optimism and confidence is high, lets hope our boys can follow through. LETS GO NINERS!!!

Caption This: Training Camp I

ProfessorBigelow — Tue, 11 Aug 2009 11:15:53 -0000

More photos » by Jeff Chiu - AP

Come on... This caption is almost too easy.... (AP Photo/Jeff Chiu)

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Hello ladies and gents, long time no see. I've spent the past week on vacation in So Cal, doing as little as possible, but it is nice to get back to the grind that is following what is the best football franchise on the planet. Since it has been a bit, I'm going to ease myself back into writing with something I owe you guys; a Caption This.

The picture to my left is your candidate for the first Caption This of training camp, and boy is it a good one. Summing up the whole QB battle in a nutshell - the struggle for the ball between Shaun Hill and Alex Smith. This is almost too easy, which means I expect some pretty fan-[site decorum]ing-tastic captions for this photo. You know the rules by now, suggest the best caption you have in the comments section of this article. Then, Rec your favorites by clicking action, then Rec. The captions with the most Rec's make the voting round.

The most recent voting round wasn't even close, and here is the winning caption and picture:

"God! I’m so happy you’re not JT!!!!!"

Internet Kudos to foosball4949, for dominating the Caption This voting round. And with that, I officially exorcise the ghosts of the 2008 49ers. No More JTO talk - he's a Bungle now, and not our concern. This is not the same team that missed out on the playoffs last year. This team is prepared to shock the world. This team, gray facemasks and all, will show the NFL that the NFC West is a force to be reckoned with... (OK, that's just my excitement taking it a bit too foar, but nevertheless, I'm just ready for football to start NOW).

Who else can't WAIT for Friday?? CAPTION THIS!!!