• joined Feb 08, 2012
  • last login Jul 09, 2014
  • posts 31
  • comments 4472
User Blog

My Brother-In-Law's Uncle is the OL Coach at Tennessee. Here's What He Said About Ja'Wuan James.

via OK, so I'll admit, I was fairly drunk when this all fell in my lap. My sister married a young man from Jeannette, PA, and he invited me to a party. A...


My Draft Plan (Hint: It Involves Alcohol)

via Ahhhh, it's the NFL off-season. I've done mock drafts on ad nauseam. I've been lurking in the shadows, studying every website, reading...


The 2014 NFL Draft, TE Debate: Jace Amaro vs. Eric Ebron

via The frenetic pace of the first few days of free agency has finally fizzled (6 "F" words in the first sentence, not bad). Oops, sorry Phrozen, let me...


NFL wants to eliminate slurs

A Miami Dolphins fan takes a look at the NFL's idea to remove slurs from the game.


SUTTON'S Guide to Smokescreens

A Miami Dolphins fan's look at the tradition of smokescreens in the NFL offseason. What is really being said is often not what was said, but what wasn't.


If You Want Dolphins News or Want to Participate in Dolphins Discussion, Don't Go Anywhere But the Phinsider.

I'm starting to get a cramp in my neck from SMH'ing so much. Done a little face-palming. Perhaps an eye roll or two. Almost sharted. Grew a couple more gray hairs. Penis became limper. All for one...


How Do We Fix Our Offense? Wile E. Coyote Can Shed Some Light...

via You remember the epic and mind-bending struggle between "The Roadrunner" and our sympathetic antihero, Wile E. Coyote. No matter the scheme, no matter...


Offense, Shmoffense. Just What Do We Think of Our Defense?

via Much has already been said about the deficiencies on offense - and rightly so. The offense held us back in 2013, stalling us at the finish line of a...


WR's: A Completely Sloppy Attempt to Try to Figure Out What to Do at a Playmaking Position

via OK, OK, slow down everyone. I know OL is a concern. Put down your pitchforks for just a moment, please. Thank you. Here's a beer. Ahhhhh, that's...


Holy Freakin' Crap!

via Didn't know how else to express myself. I've tried, like a good ol' boy, waiting patiently at 2:35 in the morning to open his Christmas presents at 8...


Uh Oh. We Play the Browns Week 1. Don't Laugh.

via As the heart of pre-season quenches our thirst for live football action, season predictions and win-loss totals begin to escalate. Many of us see the...


2013 Miami Dolphins: SUTTON's Guide to Being a Perpetual Optimist

via I woke up this morning to the sound of my 2 month-old son performing his morning routine: explosive diarrhea. You guessed it, it was my turn to...


There's a Reason Joe Philbin Keeps Bringing Up Turnovers

via And I ain't talkin' about the apple turnovers grandma used to make... Like you, I hear a lot about how turnovers are the difference in a football...


Giving Defensive Coordinators Nightmares

via Uh oh! Is it a bird? Is it a plane? Is it a run? Is it a pass? Is Tannehill thinking about what he's going to do to his wife in the jacuzzi after he...


The Media Sucks. I Think an Uppercut is in Order.

I wish the media were like King Hippo in Mike Tyson's Punch-Out...punch 'em in the gut a few times, pants fall down, KO. Let me be very clear: I hate the media. I mean, how does Heath Evans have a...


The Dao of Isaac: Miami Dolphins, the Slovenian Language, and Projectile Pooping

via As many of you know, I have been expecting a son. Finally, Isaac arrived on Thursday, June 13, at 5:15 a.m., after being 15 days late. It was the best...


Hemorrhoids, Mike Sherman, and the German Shepherd Across the Street

via What do all of these things have in common? It's something someone in the Sutton household has worried about today. My wife is super pregnant, I am...


Worried about the Dolphins chemistry? Don't be.

Human beings are full of excuses: why we didn't pay the bill on time, why we got fat, why we can't give up porn, why we don't have a better job, why we keep hanging out with "that" guy (Alpha)....


SUTTON gets negative?!?!

via Ok, Ok. I know what you are thinking. "Wait, isn't SUTTON the guy who tells us that we will win the AFC East? Isn't he the guy who rushes to the Dolphins...


Tearing apart Jason La Canfora, brick by brick.

Dudes. My son's due date is in 10 days. Trust me, I have wayyyy more important stuff to be doing. But when I saw comments from Jason La Canfora recently, I felt obligated to retort on behalf of the...


Do you know Superfknmario?

If you do, you would know that he is a bad azzzz mofo. All kidding aside, let me tell you a story about my boy Mario... A couple weeks ago, Mario and I discussed beer at length. Mario...


Why the Dolphins will overtake the Patriots THIS year

via Like you, my first instinct is to go drink a beer and punch a wall when I see this face. It seems like ever since I can remember, I see Massholes...


The NFL draft is like....March Madness?

I see a lot of arguments based on what players should be drafted where. Certain players are pegged within a 5-pick continuum. Draft value at a particular position (say Trufant at #12) is highly...


Mid-round and late-round picks at positions of need

By my estimation, here are the Miami Dolphins needs as of March 17th at 3:20 p.m. 2 CB's (one could even argue 3) 2 OT's (one could argue 1) 1 TE (one could argue 0) 1 OG (one cannot argue) C...


Ummmmmm, what do I do if my boy doesn't like the Dolphins?

I know what your first thought is: beat it into him. But the idea of prison bars doesn't resonate well with my skinny frame, easy-going nature, silky smooth skin, and luscious buttocks. I was...


My draft plan. (Hint: It involves beer.) What's yours?

Speculating about free agents and draft picks has grown on me. I used to scowl at the scientific inaccuracy of anything and everything that people hypothesize about (there's about as much chance of...


The People vs. Mike Wallace

Court is in session. Damnit Alpha6 and Kdog92, get yourselves under control. (Gavel pound, gavel pound). Before getting ahead of ourselves and projecting a 7-round mock, please remember that...


A Toast to Everyone Here at the Phinsider!

A quick background about myself so you know where I'm coming from. I was born and raised in southeast Ohio. I fell in love with Dan Marino, met him in 1987, and from there, fandom turned to...


Calling all visionaries!

As I scan the endless sea of mock drafts, reflect on others' opinions on the state of the roster and how it should change through contract negotiations and free agency, Ireland and Ross, new...


Zig-Zags, Beers, and a Couple of Chill Pills

Holy crap! We talk about Ireland and Ross being scorned prom dates with their recent free agency exploits, and yet Dolphin fans are acting like the overly self-conscious, pimply-faced, paranoid...

Showing 1 - 30 of 31 Older
Log In Sign Up

Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.


You must be a member of to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at You should read them.


You must be a member of to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at You should read them.




Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.