D'Antoni to fire Marbury, take heart of Suns team to NYC

Sabrewulf — Tue, 13 May 2008 20:41:41 -0000

http://sports.yahoo.com/nba/rumors/post/D-Antoni-wants-Marbury-out-Diaw-Barbosa-in-wit;_ylt=AjuVhQYG0IRiqQ8ugT4BAZmezIx4?urn=nba,82195

I hate to give this man recognition, but wow.

First, D'Antoni mans up and threatens something no one in NYC had the balls to suggest, even after Marbury repeatedly made like Eric Cartman and said "screw you guys, ahm goin' home."

Second, D'Antoni declares his intent to gut Phoenix. At this point, Nash = Jason Kidd or even Shaq, in terms of value ... old with nagging injuries. Barbosa and Diaw represent extremely talented players who will keep getting better with time. The Suns stomped us when these two played well, esp. Diaw in Game 4.

Too bad they will never learn good defense up in NYC. We'll see if D'Antoni can pull this off and if Steve Kerr is stupid enough to bite.

Sabre

EDIT Quote of the day:

" One of the first plays Mike D'Antoni is expected to draw up as the Knicks' new coach is for Stephon Marbury to run up the Garden floor ... and out the door back to Phoenix to rejoin the Suns "

Talk about not doing Steve Kerr any favors. I HATE Marbury. He's up there with Billy Bob.

Bill Simmons sucks. If I had a tumor, I would name it Bill Simmons.

Sabrewulf — Fri, 02 May 2008 00:33:33 -0000

The Sports Guy's Latest ...

Maybe the Suns didn't win a championship, but we'll remember them 100 times more fondly than the brutally efficient and hopelessly bland Spurs, who taught everyone over the years that the regular season doesn't matter, transformed the NBA Playoffs into a flopathon, revived the vile and fan-unfriendly Hack-A-Shaq strategy and did everything short of sending Bruce Bowen out on the court with a chain saw and a taser. If the Spurs were the Team of the Decade, no wonder ratings dwindled until the league's big comeback this season. The real shame is that all the mugging, acting, eye-rolling, flopping, rule-bending and hysterical shrugging obscured what should have been remembered as a throwback sports team, a shrewdly assembled roster of well-coached guys who played beautifully together, didn't care about credit and revolved around the best power forward who ever played. Instead, we'll remember them as the team that turned the NBA Playoffs into the World Cup. Congratulations, fellas.

I will now translate, point by point.

1) The Suns never won because teams that I dislike often beat the Suns like red-headed stepchildren ... we're talking game margins of 4-1 or 4-2.

2) Despite this, I still have their balls in my mouth.

3) The team that wins the most games during the regular season should win the championship, right? We should just eliminate the playoffs altogether and give the trophy to the team with the best record, or better yet, the team that I, Bill Simmons, like best.

4) The Spurs punish teams like Phoenix who often lead the league in turnovers and fouls comitted. The Spurs also punish professional players who cannot shoot free throws, a skill many middle school basketball players have mastered.

5) The Spurs are at fault for lowering ratings. Other teams are not at fault for neglecting their fundamentals and getting dominated. I, Bill Simmons, see no connection between the new, league-wide focus on DEFENSE and the extremely competitive '08 playoffs. The Lakers, the Jazz, and my beloved Celtics are contenders because people like them, not because all three teams improved defensively this year.

6) I subconsciously know why the Spurs are good, but I refuse to respect them for it.

7) The Spurs are a slow, dull, boring team. Except for Tony Parker, the most agile and exciting pointguard besides Chris Paul, and Manu Ginobili, the most clutch shooter in the NBA and the most fearless international player to ever dribble a ball. They are not worth watching.

Alright, I'm done emasculating his article. Bill Simmons jumped on the Suns bandwagon years ago because the Celtics weren't any fun to root for, and now he's too stupid to get off.

If you would like to see Bill Simmons humiliated further, go here. http://theenemiesofbillsimmons.blogspot.com/2007_02_01_archive.html

"When doctors circumsized Bill Simmons, they threw away the wrong piece." ~ Me.

Sabre

SB Nation User Blog: Sabrewulf

D'Antoni to fire Marbury, take heart of Suns team to NYC

Bill Simmons sucks. If I had a tumor, I would name it Bill Simmons.