Salutations and adulations, Rowbotlets of Purplerowland. Boy, it's been a long time since we've seen each other, huh? Due to a multiplicity of factors, not least my insane work schedule for my last few months in Asheville and an internet connection that only worked if a butterfly was flapping its wings (or not) in Beijing, my meaningful participation around here has been essentially zero. I can't promise that it's going to tick back up again for good, but I am now back in Denver permanently, have a little off time and (ZOMGZ) a functional connection, so this seemed as good a time as any to compose my first Review Rewind since April.

It won't be a terribly long edition, but it will cover the salient developments of this week. Aka, the good, the bad, and the boom. If you want to check out what those are, agree with my conclusions, and/or object to my classifications, then JUMP!

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It's a funny game, this baseball. Last week, you're feeling on top of the world, everything is going awfully well, and birds sing sweet sonatas from treetops and what have you. This week, you feel distinctly annoyed after the Rockies dropped their second straight series, nearly got no-hit twice in the course of it, then had the normally stellar bullpen give up a game-deciding homer immediately after the guys scratched and clawed back to tie it in the eighth. This in itself being an accomplishment, as Josh "The Beast" Johnson and our own Ubaldo had dueling no-hitters going through the first half of the game, but Ubaldo then decided to walk the bases loaded in the bottom of the fifth, come within a rabbit's whisker of getting out of it, then give up a two-out, three-run triple to Omar "All Star" Infante.

Blargh.

Nonetheless, despite a 2-4 week, there are indications that the sunshine, jelly beans, and Reese's chocolate eggs may not have run out entirely. Grab a fistful of Marshmallow Peeps and join me after the jump.

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In an action only slightly less daring than going over Niagara Falls in a barrel, I am hoping that my internet will play nice long enough to throw this (somewhat short, but who cares) Rockies Review Rewind onto the Interwebs. There's plenty to chew through, and plenty to praise, most of which we've done already, but hey. It's always nice to bask in victory (last night notably excepted). And Tulo, who is, well, a monster.

Because that's just the way things are going these days, and the team hasn't even played their best ball yet -- CarGo is just heating up now, the team batting average coming into today's game was only .259, and of course Ubaldo hasn't had a healthy start. But this has been, ridiculously, good enough to catapult the guys into firm possession of baseball's best record at 12-3. (Worst record? The Red Sox. Aha. AHA. AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA).

Ahem. If you want to keep on enjoying the newfound PURPLE POWER, then JUMP.

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Man, that Greg Reynolds. Can we start with him? He's just so dreamy. If it's not the 89-mph fastball or the caveman hair, it's the skinny legs and high socks -- or oh yeah, the 2 runs in 6 innings in his first major league start since 2008. Although it'll only be (hopefully) one more start until Ubaldo returns, I know all of us here at the Greg Reynolds Fan Club will be very sad to see him go. But we can always

/looks up

/realizes auditorium is empty

/tumbleweed rolls by

GOSH YOU GUYSSSSSSS

Sigh. If I am to be prevented from expounding at length on the virtues of the Little Seventh-Choice Spot Starter That Could, I guess I can get around to reviewing the good, the bad, and the ugly from the first full week of Rockies baseball. Take a flying leap.

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Greetings and salutations, fair denizens of Rockies Nation. (Lookit me, changing it up here.) Welcome to the first edition of Rockies Rewind (with Silver!), which means that I am now a name brand. Woot woot. In his introductory primer for new fans, Andrew Martin has given you to expect:

After a long week of Rockies baseball, Silverblood graces us all with a curmudgeonly bard's tale of the week we just witnessed. Expect overreactions, gut instincts, and typically something to laugh at, or at least make you nod your head and say "yeah...YEAH!"

Well um

let me see here

/clears throat

/recites Shakespearean sonnet

/shouts, "YOU KIDS GET OFF MY LAWN"

/AARON COOK IS GUNNA BE HURT THE WHOLE SEASON AND UBALL DIDN'T HAVE A 0.00 ERA IN SPRING TRAINING, WE ARE PATENTLY TEH DOOMED

/Carlos Gonzalez is totally gonna win the MVP this year

/ lame knock-knock joke

ROCKIES ARE THE BEST, OFF TO HECK WITH ALL THE REST

YEAH

YEAH

/takes breath

If you feel as if this has fit the bill, join me after the jump for a quick recap of Spring Training, and a look ahead to the glorious Elysian fields of the Regular Season (tm) that await us. In only five days. Booya.

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Good eveni

Good evening Ro

is this thing on

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////////

Good evening Rowbots! It's pretty clear that I haven't done this for a while, isn't it? Far more brilliant and incisive observers than myself have already provided you with heaps and heaps of analysis about the completed 2010 season (I am told something called the Giants won the World Series. Nope, nope, not happening) and the upcoming 2011 season, so I am unsure if my humble pastiche will serve any purpose apart from to summarize and amuse. But by popular request, I'm back, and assuming a) my home Internet connection cooperates, and b) I have any extra brain cells, I will do my best to furnish the hoi polloi with my customary column capping up all the comings and goings in Rockiesland. I'm not going to promise it every week (if all goes according to plan, I will be working two jobs and going to grad school full time, which is not very conducive to maintaining my established standard of scintillating commentary) but I am determined to make an effort.

The only minor thing is that said column will no longer, per request of the new management, be called Rockies Review. Apparently there is some association with another blog we wish to avoid, so I'll officially open the floor to suggestions as to what it should be retitled. Rockies Revue? Rockies Report? Kinda boring. Super Special Sunday Silver-Rama! Yeahhhhh! *

Join me below for my, um, special take on this upcoming season.

-*- I think someone should talk me out of this one.

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Good evening, Rowbots. It's a dreary one where I am, not only due to the results of today but also because it's raining. (As a consequence of the former more than the latter, I am somewhat out of temper.) To say that that series, apart from last night, could have gone better is an understatement, but the Rockies already handicapped themselves coming into it by letting themselves get swept by the lowly Diamondbacks. That's the kind of thing that a serious contender just can't do in the season's closing weeks, and the guys shot themselves in the foot entirely on their own accord. While the streakiness was fun, it's going to take something more than last-gasp Rocktember magic to transform a team that was unpredictable all year into a playoff entrant. And to be perfectly honest, if you can't win on the road all year long, you don't really deserve it.

Recently, some of our opponents have been kind enough to suggest that the "something more" we have been employing is to resort to monkey business with the humidor. It's become a big enough issue that MLB has ordered the umpires to monitor it. Indeed, the Rockies couldn't possibly have actually won games on their own accord and pulled off late-inning rallies without a little black-market fixing.

I think it's time that this was addressed. If you feel likewise, join me after the jump.

Fair warning: I am very, very angry.

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Good evening, Rowbots. It has come to my attention that a little thing called a Thongbino walkoff homer took place today, giving a team of irredeemable CHEATERZ their tenth win in a row. While this all may be voided once BUD comes along to drop the banhammer on us, in the meantime there's still plenty to celebrate. With the down-on-their-luck Padres limping into town after coughing up a timeshare of first place to the Gints, now is the perfect time to live up to our name as the Colorado Zombies and promptly eat their BRAINZ. (Why didn't we do this to the Giants the last time we played them, you say? Well, for us to eat BRAINZ, there must be BRAINZ. QED.)

I have to say, I have no idea how the team can possibly do this September after September. I don't know if the pixie dust is in a time-lock safe or what. But it's pretty crazy, and absent all the terrible things they do like losing to the Pirates and being groan-worthy in general on the road, they are definitely one of the most unpredictable and exciting teams in baseball. Search me why they can't play like this all year, but whatever it is about the leaves falling, the Rockies go nuts. I can't think of a team that has consistently been this magical down the stretch run, and if it does end with a postseason berth, they will have made it there in three of four years. Not too bad for a bunch of LOSERZ.

As you may or may not have noticed, I have been absent virtually all summer. This is because I have had time to follow the team only on a cursory level -- checking box scores, maybe an inning or two on Gameday -- and because of that, I felt that it was rather counterproductive to offer my low-rent insight when you lot would already have it diagrammed six ways from Sunday (literally). For example, I wasn't even aware that CarGo was a contender for the Triple Crown until just this past Reds series. While my purple passion is undimmed, real life is harshing my buzz in a major way right now, bro.

Nonetheless, as you may also recall from my last Rockies Review (posted on July 4) there have been plenty of awesome things about this summer as well. If you'd like to come back to Asheville with me and look at the tales and travails of a Single-A club, then join me after the jump.

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Good evening, Rowbots. I am finally permitted to address you again, as the Internet Gods have decided, for the moment, to rule in my favor. However, we will be going a slightly different direction tonight. While there is, as usual, no shortage of material to dissect (Ubaldo and Tulo are going to the All-Star Game, is Uball finally turning into a human, can CarGo go too, Olivo wuz robbed blind, I hate the Giants, damn yo that was pathetic even though we won, I really hate the Giants, etc etc) I have decided to take you on a trip with me. Through the looking glass, so to speak. Tonight, instead of looking forward, we're going to be looking back. The topic we will be examining tonight is the road to the Show. A few entertaining stories. Some scurrilous gossip, appropriately censored. In short, a look into what it's like in Single-A ball during a hot summer in Asheville, where the dreams run high, but the performers are still waiting in the wings.

Join me after the jump for your in-depth tour. It's long, but worthwhile.

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Good evening, Rowbots. It is my pleasure to address y'all for the first time in several weeks, as matters are somewhat more settled in my new life down here and I have (for the moment) internet at my apartment. It is still liable to go out if a butterfly flaps its wings in Beijing, but I decided to be very audacious and hope that it works. There has been no shortage of results to slice and dice this week, and that is what I'm planning to do tonight. I'm still not sure if I'll be able to promise the Review every Sunday, as you have been accustomed to, but I'll try my best.

So, we all ask, what is going on with the guys? They absolutely fall on their faces against second-banana NL competition, then go out and put the screws to a very powerful Jays team to squeak through the homestand with a winning mark. 60 games in, and they're still clinging to .500 like a security blankie. What's the outlook? Is Todd Helton ever going to stop resembling Danny Ardoin? Will we ever be able to lay claim to the title of the best in the West? What rationale will Charlie Manuel come up with for starting Roy Halladay over Ubaldo in the All-Star Game?

These and other pressing questions are ruminated upon below. Join Milo, Tock, and myself, and jump to the Island of Conclusions. After you.

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Good evening, Rowbots, and welcome to the dungeon. Lightning crackles, thunder crashes, esoteric chemicals burble strangely, and disturbing noises echo in the air. Jim Tracy, wearing goggles and a black cape, adjusts dials and rubs his hands together in prototypical mad-scientist fashion, while keeping a careful eye on the tangled wires and tubes attached to the body of the 2010 Colorado Rockies. The body is strapped to a gurney. It appears to be lifeless. But then, as another bolt of thunder rumbles, lightning strikes the tower and multicolored fluid rushes down the tubes....

For an agonizing moment.... nothing. But then!

A spark, and another. Jim Tracy cackles in prototypical mad-scientist fashion, thrusting his gloved hands triumphantly into the air, as we all realize:

IT'S ALIIIIIIVE!!!!

Join me after the jump for a look at whether the Rockies are primed for a resurrection, and a very important announcement about the future.

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You know, I'm almost positive I've written this Review before. You know, the one where we show flashes of promise, turn in a few great pitching performances, win a series, but ultimately end the week with a kind of sour taste in our mouths, thanks to a possibly problematic injury and a flat disappointing effort -- continuing our pattern of win, lose, win, lose, win, lose, lose, which has led us to a pretty-good-considering-it's-May-but-really-what-the-hell mark of 15-16. Most of us, myself included, will be at least somewhat satisfied with a 4-5 road trip that took us through notoriously hostile West Coast environs, but I'd say we're the definition of "treading water" right now, still in the position of waiting for a hot streak and getting all the pieces to click at the same time. Aside from the Machine, who I suggest should be christened Robin if he keeps this up (of course, we will need to see how he does when not starting in a pair of pitcher's parks at night, etc etc) and Batman Jimenez, the gangsta bus is put-putting rather than pedal-metaling its way down the highway. This is, as you may expect, an irritating state of affairs.

There are a few reasons for this. One of them is just past the jump. WARNING: It is highly disturbing. Click over if you dare.

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Good evening, Rowbots, and welcome to the feeling of smug superiority that is beating the Giants -- until you realize that they won both of the first two games, we're only a third done with the Awful Evil Nine-Game West Coast Road Trip, and still have to make pit stops at both Petco and Chavez Ravine before heading home to face the Phillies and the Natinals. I'm sure your mood will pick up as you recognize that it is Ubaldo Day tomorrow, before turning down again as you wonder when the guys are ever going to put together a stinking winning streak. Win the game, lose the game, lose the game, lose the game, and now you just lost the Game, and so did everyone else. Ha ha.

It's May 2, and the Rockies are one game under .500. Progress? Maybe. Join me after the jump as we get the skinning knives out.

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Wow. Normally when I say it's been a strange week, I mean that there were a few zany extra-inning affairs, that the umpires diddled us out of a game, that some unexpected hero stepped up or our game thread went even more meta than usual. But in this case, it really has been a strange and troubling week -- catalyzed, of course, by the death of club president Keli McGregor on Tuesday morning, April 20th. Nobody knows why, in either a physical or an epistemological sense. Why is it that the good go young? If you have an answer for that, there's definitely a lot of people interested in knowing it.

Join me after the jump for some thoughts.

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To say the least, there's been no lack of drama this week, some of the good kind (the very good kind) and some of the bad kind (the very bad kind.) If I'd written this Review a few hours ago, it likely would have been a seething polemic against the game, the umpires (who apparently went to school at the College for the Blind), Franklin Morales' inability to nail down a damn save even after being screwed more vigorously then Jenna Jameson, how crappy we played despite said screwing, and general muttering about what a terrible effing way that was to end the series after the Rocky Mountain Extra-High that came with the first no-no in club history. Now, I hope, I have slightly more perspective, although the anger is going to stick for a while.

We're exactly where we were at the end of last week: .500. We're not sucking up the joint, but we're not looking terrific either. We had plenty of chances today to make a larger gap on the scoreboard than we did, but there's no denying that the calls were terrible and anyone who is upset about that surely has a right to be -- to an extent. However, if a no-hitter and a stunning loss can't get a team fired up, I don't know what can.

Join me after the jump as I snap on my surgical gloves and perform the postmortem.

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A little bit like this Review, the Rockies are having some trouble getting started. After winning the opener in Milwaukee, they dropped the next two, came home and beat the tar juice out of the Padres (far preferable to losing to the Dbacks, as has happened the last two years) then lost a bruiser in extra innings before winning today, completing their first week of play with a 3-3 record. Obviously, .500 is nothing to sneeze at, considering how we've gotten going in the past few years, but it's clear that there's plenty of rust that needs to be scraped off. On the flip side, there have been just as many encouraging signs, chief of which is the pwnage of Carlos Gonzalez and Ian Stewart and the double-headed hydra of Jorge Deala Rosa and Ubaldo Jimenez (is this the year we vanquish Bad Jorge for good, or are we all far, far too optimistic about one start at home against a light-hitting club?)

I tackle this question, and others, in the first edition of the Review to actually count. Join me after the jump.

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Yes, I am aware both that I am mixing my holidays and that there's something going on between those two obscure AL East teams that bears a vague resemblance to our beloved game, but I will be forced to disqualify it. As far as I am concerned, the season begins tomorrow at 12:10 MT/2:10 ET, when at last, after a hiatus of far, far too long, our beloved purple pinstriped boys will take the field. Ubaldo Jimenez vs. Yovani Gallardo, Miller Park. I'll be able to catch the first hour or so, but I will then be unavoidably detained by class. At least I plan to do nothing on Friday afternoon aside from watch the home opener.

I was planning to make this Review the prognostication corner, but then Rox Girl had to go and pre-empt me this morning, so unless you have a few individual stat lines or off-the-wall fearless/bizarre predictions (like who will nearly fall victim to the racing sausages tomorrow) I don't know what I have for you. Now is the time when everything has been analyzed and theorized to within an inch of its life. We've roundly castigated those who don't appear to be on the Rockies bandwagon, and some who appear to be on it (I'm looking at you, Mark Kiszla). We've put all our weight of hope and expectation on them, and now it's just a countdown until that moment when life begins again.

It's springtime, and anything is possible. Tomorrow begins a journey that we hope will not end until November, in ecstasy instead of agony. We'll overreact to everything. We'll worry about platoons and sore shoulders. We'll calculate VORP and wOBA and cheer for concourse bombs and shutouts. We'll scream and jump up and down and make fools of ourselves. We'll bitch and carp and groan and think the world's ending. We'll ponder closer committees and outfield battles. We'll hang on through high summer and nerve-wracking autumn. We're used to giving everything, but we'll still give it one more time.

Because, after all, that's just what we do.

GO ROCKIES!!!!!!!!!!!!

Evening, Rowbots. This edition is going to be brief to the point of scandal, seeing as I've been up since 4am, have travelled cross-country in that time period, and need to be up at 6:30 am tomorrow for work (Oh I love easing back from spring break. Not). In short, I'm mainly just throwing this up so you have a place to discuss anything that crosses your mind about the past week (and knowing PR, that may or may not actually have anything to do with baseball).

A few notes to get you started:

• This is the last Sunday of spring training. Next Sunday, which coincidentally happens to be Easter, we will get something else back to life: the 2010 season. Yankees and Red Sox, in Fenway Pahk. Big surprise. I'm rooting for the meteor. Since I'm in New York, I can even confidently root for it to take out Boston without fear for my personal safety.
• The biggest question remaining at this point pertains to who gets the last bullpen spot: Joe Beimel, Tim Redding, or Justin Speier. At the moment, it's still quite nebulous. Redding and Speier both had poor outings the last time, and Beimel was only signed a week ago. For what it's worth, public sentiment is very decidedly against Redding.
• Tulo is starting to look like a monster, with yet another three-run bomb today to propel us to a thrilling tie with the A's. But if the switch goes off the instant the calendar turns to April, then someone is going to have some 'splainin to do.
• Huston Street will start the season on the DL, but is hoping to be back in the closer's role by May 1. It remains to be seen if Franklin Morales will assert himself as the replacement for the time being, or if Tracy goes to closer-by-committee if Franklin goes nuclear (y helo thar Manny Corpas!) I dunno about you, but I'm a little worried.
• Jason Giambi and Todd Helton are already, by their own admittance, like an old married couple.
• Go easy on Chris Iannetta this year. He's expecting a baby after all. Let's just hope he's not talking to Manny.

On a final note, I left Colorado today for the last time in a while. It doesn't mean I won't be back, it just means I don't know when. The thought of not seeing another Rockies game in person for who knows how long is ... strange. To say the least. I suppose I don't need to tell you this, but those of you who DO go this year, enjoy it just a little more. I can't believe we're almost there...!

Okay. Take it away.

Good evening, Rowbots. I apologise for the lateness of this edition, and also for the fact that we will be going in a slightly different direction tonight. It's still spring training, so I figured this was the best time to do so. (Hey, we don't really want to rehash all the pain of our latest entanglement with the Royals, do we? God, I can't believe we have to play them again this year). Arriving at the end of one part of my life has gotten me thinking about the importance that baseball is going to play in the next part of it, specifically the Rockies. They've been involved in my life in a bigger way before, and will be so again.

So if you feel like delving into something that's not specifically game-related, but is important to me and has to do with how much our favorite team is really part of who I am, then join me after the jump.

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Well, we're certainly an insatiable bunch. Just after we've finally been granted our wish and have something resembling the game of baseball being played on a semi-daily basis by something that appears to be our favorite team, we've already gotten bored with the spring-training shuffles and are ready to move onto the main event. Sadly, by my calculations, that still appears to be another three-odd weeks distant. In the meantime, we can just complain at the deleterious turn our fortunes have taken; even if it's spring, we don't like losing. After starting out 5-2, the Rockies neatly reversed that mark last week and went 2-5 instead, leading to a 7-7 overall Cactus League tally. OMG WE R GOIN 2 LOOZ TEH WEST.

Overreactions aside, we are still ready for real baseball, not just real fake baseball. And prognosticating. We definitely have time to do a lot of that. This will be a short edition since I've got to be up bright and early tomorrow for my first step on the way to Life After College, but I'll get you started after the jump.

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Greetings and salutations, most honourable fellow Rowbots. I'm checking in as scheduled, to bring you the best, most fail-safe, clinically tested observations about the state of our beloved hometown nine. Nothing but hard facts and piercing insight here, in which we will take six Cactus League games and proceed to analyze the crap out of them. Now if --

BASEBALL!

uh scuse me. Sorry about that. As I was saying --

BASEBALL! BASEBALL! BASEBALL! GLORY HALLELUJAH! BASEBALL! IT'S BACK! WE HAVE REACHED THE PROMISED LAND!

/runs up stairs

/runs down stairs

BASSSEEBAAALLLLL HOW WE'VE MISSED YOU

/runs up hallway

/runs down hallway

/runs across campus

BASEBALL BASEBALL BASEBAL....

/collapses in heap

I'm sorry. I had to get that out of my system. Take a flying leap and land after the jump for the latest hot-off-the-press and completely infallible predictions that we can make from observing the first action of the decade.

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Hi folks,

Just a friendly programming note from your resident Reviewer: there won't be an "official" Rockies Review until spring training games begin, unless you really want me to meticulously recap each of the "best shape of my life" stories that are proliferating on everybody's radar screens right now. We could always play "Spot The Non-Roster Invitee" and "FrancisWatch: Nope, Still Not Cracking 90" and "Pin the Beard on Tim Redding" and "Who Strained Their Hamstring Already?" and all the other amusing undertakings that are just getting into gear right now. However, these subjects are usually admirably hashed through in the daily Rockpiles and FanPosts, and there's not really enough material to overanalyze yet (although that certainly won't stop us from trying). Therefore, you may reliably expect your inaugural Review, with results from real live games *, to appear in this space on March 7.

* Some restrictions may apply. See store for details.

In the meantime, I'll do the same thing as the rest of you: stare at the countdown clock and read more stories about how, Believe it or Not, we MAY actually be good this year.

As always, if there's anything you'd like to see included in future incarnations of the Review, suggestions can be put in the box below.

Yoohoo there, Rowbots! The dust is being brushed off, the machinery is firing up, and the 2010 baseball season is checking its parachute and ready to hit the drop doors. Of course, it won't start with nearly as much a bang as we would like, as we still have to get through all those days of B-team workouts, "best shape of my life" stories, and fearless prognostications about how the Dodgers are the runaway favorites to win the West. But the fact remains that at the time of this writing, pitchers and catchers are scheduled to report to Tucson in 3 days, 19 hours, and 5 minutes. This will be the last year at venerable Hi Corbett before the Rockies depart for more conveniently located pastures, but it's only 18 days until they play their first spring training game -- March 4 against the Diamondbacks, 1:05 pm. I can only imagine the rush to the radio that the purple faithful will execute, and how much it will finally begin to feel like summer again when we hear the crack of the bat, the snap of the ball, the sound of Clint Barmes hitting a popup and Greg Smith tearing something.

The Rockies have had a fairly quiet offseason. No splashy moves like trading for Roy Halladay. Nonetheless, they've taken steps to retain and improve their NL Wild-Card winning unit, and have good reason to believe that they can get the decade started off right in 2010. Wanna get back up to speed on why that is, and what we have to look forward to? Join me after the jump.

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The round of imaginary hardware-dispensing concludes today, in the form of the National League MVP. This is the last of the six awards voted on by the staff, and the third unanimous one, after which we will all have to sit back and wait for the real ones to be announced, then scoff behind our hands that they are clearly not as deserving as ours.

As Jabberwocky Poseidon warned, the choice may indeed be slightly contentious. Wanna see why? You have to JUMP.

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Well, Rowbots, the season is still over. Sadly. I've been around, but I had to take a week cold turkey off from the Rockies because that Game (you know the one) hurt so much that I still haven't been able to bring myself to watch highlights from the eighth inning. So we're left to watch the Angels beat themselves, Chase Utley morph into Chuck Knoblauch, and other such exciting postseason baseball (at least this time sans Frank TV). Yankees-Dodgers World Series FTW! (Give me the meteor).

There isn't much to say on the Rockies front that hasn't already been said, but I thought I'd throw this up there and explain how thingz iz gon work from now, through the blasted, desolate no-baseball hinterlands until life begins next spring (I hear there's an invention called football, may have to give it a try). As I see it, the Review is most usefully constituted as a weekly feature during the season, so I must sadly report that this is the last regular post for a while. If something big happens in Rockiesland, like us signing John Lackey +, Clint Hurdle being re-hired, or anything else like that, then I'll Review the beejeezus out of it, just for you, my loyal readers. But life will begin again next spring, by which point the Dodgers will have been humiliatingly booted out of the playoffs + and someone else that is not the Yankees will be busy hoisting a championship flag and giving out hardware. Time for us to dream again, keep ourselves warm over the hot stove, enjoy the crisp fall air and the upcoming holiday season, all that.

I have to say, the sting of that Game will take a while to dissipate, but I'm still able to thank the Rockies for a great, highly enjoyable, heart-attack-inducing season that (I certainly do hope) marks the beginning of their ascent to a regular contender. There will be transactions aplenty, awards to give out, and time to speculate, until the crocuses start showing and the buses roll into Phoenix, and by that time spring will have been sprung and we'll be ready to run the gauntlet all over again.

Thanks much for all your support and kind comments this year. It's been a lot of fun doing this Review for you. If you have suggestions on how I can improve it for next season, don't hesitate to leave them in the box below.

Colorado Rockies vs. Milwaukee Brewers, Miller Park, 12:10 PM MT. Monday, April 5, 2010. Be there or be square.

/turns out the spotlight

/exits stage right

+ LET ME DREAM OKAAAAAY

First things first: Wow, what an incredible season. From the word go way the hell back on April 6 (losing to the Dbacks in their home opener by a score of 9-8) to coming to the technical end today (losing to the Dodgers in their home closer by a score of 5-3) it's been a rollercoaster of epic proportions. Bookended between those two losses to NL West division opponents was down down down, up up up, down down, and up down up again. (One thing that didn't change was more losses to the Dodgers, but we'll magnanimously overlook that fact). If 2007 was our filing of intentions to be taken seriously as a contender forthwith, then 2008 was the embarrassing Polaroids that we should hide under the bed (ask Rox Girl about that) and 2009 represents the ship finally sailing. Or so we hope. The team matured, after the much-publicized and shockingly effective in-season managerial resetting, from a gawky collection of talented but underachieving individuals into a purple-and-black dynamo that's rumbling into the playoffs as the possessor of its second wild card berth in three seasons, with a chance to lay to rest the lingering sour taste from Rocktober Part Une.

Join me after the jump as we glory in the good moments, rejoice that the bad moments are over with, hide the evidence, fuel the RV, and prepare to wreak doom upon the unsuspecting peons of Philadelphia (who, no doubt, are planning the same for us. Look out beloooooowww!)

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I have to say, Rockies fans, it is a stroke of luck that I am alive to write this. What with the team redefining the meaning of the Heart Attack Pack on a daily basis, the inability of the Braves to lose a damn game, and the well-chronicled ineptitude of the four Mensa candidates in blue, it's been a stressful weekend. At the end of it, we still hang on, maybe more or less by the seat of our pants, but hey. The U.S.S. Rockie has been taking on some water, but it's not time to launch the lifeboats yet (and hopefully not ever. But haven't we learned by now that it's never ever easy with this lot?). Suddenly, our season-long foe, the San Francisco Gi-nots, are 5.5 games arrears with an elimination number of 2, and we are staving off the last Charge of the Tomahawk Brigade instead. As SDCat likes to say, Rockies, for the love of God, do not make us live in a world where John Kruk is right.

The reason we are not only a slender 1.5 games up: Clint Barmes. Barmes has been run ragged around here, and deservedly so, for his foibles at the plate, but that play to end it today felt like as much a season-saver as Betancourt beating Schierholtz at the Phonebooth. Barmes usually brings his glove even if his bat has been in the great Lumberyard in the Sky for most of the month (although in fairness, it may be attempting to re-materialize). Yet today, this may have been the first time we were so thrilled to see the words "Barmes" and "popup" in the same sentence. Let's just say this. I went to get dinner a good 30-40 minutes after the game was over, and my legs were still shaking.

It is no longer time to look back. We will only be looking forward. Kindly join me after the jump as we sound the horn of Helton Hammerhand in the deep ONE. LAST. TIME.

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It was a close thing. At one point, it looked as if the Giants might have cut our legs off, but instead, denial worked, the leg came back, and we sprang to our feet and ran the sword through that annoying black-and-orange entrant in return. Now we have to see if it'll finally knock them down for good. (Answer: not likely). But being in this position at all is highly preferable over just 48 hours or so ago. What was shaping up as a truly craptacular road trip was redeemed today by a number of complex scientific factors, such as the skyrocketing graph of Yorvit Torrealba's awesomeness, the angular momentum of a pair of Golden Thongbombs, the square root of Tulo's clutchiness and CarGo's speed -- even the gentle breezes of Stewart's K's and the lovely calculable parabola of a Barmes popout. Or, in layman's terms, Good U-ball returned today after an unfortunate hiatus in San Francisco, the Rockies finally figured out Danny Haren, and they escaped the desert with a 5-1 win, to take 2 of 3 from Arizona and close out a difficult road trip at 4-5. Not exactly what they were looking for, mixing in a pair of tough losses against San Diego, a pair of total blowouts in San Francisco, and a blown lead in Arizona. But, remarkably, the Giants, Marlins, and Braves all lost today as well, pushing the Rockies back to 4.5 games clear in the wild card -- just where they were before all the pain began.

And so, if they can shake off the offensive rust (which showed signs of happening in hitter-friendly Chase Field and should be aided by finally heading back to Coors) they ought to be nicely assured of a playoff spot. Knock on wood.

Join me after the jump to examine top performers, the upcoming chess games, and sundry other factors to aid in the Rockies' ambition of having the Giants arranging tee times a few weeks from now.

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It's been an up-and-down sort of week. It began with an eight-game winning streak that included a pair of dramatic comebacks (Seth Smith's two-run walkoff single against the Reds, Yorvit Torrealba's three-run ninth-inning double against the Padres) but all in all, it ended with something of a sour taste, as Franklin Morales performed the ignominious feat of a walk-off walk in dropping the second game of the series to the Friars. That was followed up today by an all-around failure, resulting in a 7-3 loss. Coupled with the Giants finally figuring out how to beat the Dodgers, it left us 3 back in the division and 4.5 up in the wild card. While technically that is a sweep-proof lead (even if the Giants do, please god no, what they did to us last time, we'll still be up 1.5) let us hope that it does not come to that. While we've already established that nothing good will come easily, I don't particularly want to let the Giants come creeping back. We had them on the ropes at 5.5 games out. We still do hold the 4.5 game edge, and with only 18 games to play, the math becomes inexorable at some point. That doesn't mean we need to start doing anything... stupid.

Join me after the jump for a look at some of the things we need to quit doing as we head to San Fran for a series that can either settle the issue fairly decisively, or make it juuuuuust a wee bit too interesting once again.

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About this time last week, nobody was in particularly good spirits, as the Giants' come-from-behind win, featuring an Edgar Renteria grand slam (sorry for the memories, go ahead and repress them again) had secured a three-game sweep for them and a tie in the wild card. While not exactly panic, let's just say that the sentiment around here wasn't one of sunshine and roses.

Well, as we've learned all year, a week can make all kinds of difference, and that anything can happen in the wild, wild West (and the wild, wild card). Not that this week seemed to be making one. We were locked in tango with the Giants; after a lone misstep on their part allowed us to claim a one-game lead, that was how matters remained. We won, they won. We lost, they lost. We all stopped thinking that it was going to be easy when that comfy-looking four -game lead vanished quicker than you can say, "Seth Smith is a sexy beast," and unless something drastically unforeseen takes place in the last few weeks of the regular season, the race is going to come down to the wire. Anybody up for another play-in game.....?

Gentlemen, start your defibrillators.

Join me after the jump as we take a look at the factors fueling a 5-1 (thus far) homestand, and our return to a two-game lead in the Wild Card (thanks to our 13-5 beatdown of the Snakes today, and Prince Fielder hitting a walk-off homer to beat the Giants in 12).

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