Iowa could be among of the most under understood states in the Union.

Not because it seeks to confuse outsiders with it's cultural complexity like, say, Texas, California or Florida does. Nor is it because it's diminutively disregarded, like a Rhode Island or a Delaware. No, Iowa is under understood because it's more or less an anonymous state. First off, most people don't have a clue where Iowa is on a map. And those that are geographically conscious enough to correctly identify Iowa as the state situated between Minnesota and Missouri probably couldn't supply a single additional insight about the place, although they might be able to filibuster a Jeopardy tryout with inane Minnesota and Missouri trivia.

Years ago when I was at a Florida nightclub on a Spring Break baseball trip I asked a pretty girl wearing a Georgia Bulldogs t-shirt to dance. On the dance floor she asked me where I was from. What ensued was this exchange, which every Iowan is all too familiar:

[dance music blaring in background]

Girl: Where do you go to school?

Me: The University of Iowa.

Girl: I can't hear you. The University of what?

Me: Iowa!

Girl: Oh! Well down here we pronounce that "Ohio."

The University of Iowa football program suffers too from this national anonymity.

Continue reading this post »

Dear Coach Ferentz,

Ah, spring! The season of rebirth and awakening, renewal and regrowth.

Nothing is so beautiful or hopeful as the morning dew on the leaves of a budding tree in spring, or the freshly laid chalk lines for a spring football game. As the flowers bloom and you prepare your Hawkeyes for the new season that lies ahead I write in hopes you'll read this, but also with the glacially bitter realization that the chances of you actually reading this are somewhere between an N Sync summer stadium tour and J. Lo driving anything, let alone a Fiat. So, knowing the odds of you ever seeing this letter are longer than a Terrance Malick film, I say "Hey Kirk Ferentz's secretary's intern, please hear me out!"

Few college coaches at a major program get the chance to redefine himself late in life. The ones who do most often have to pack-up and move to another school to do it. And this year, mostly as a result of the expected and unexpected loss of your coordinators, you have backed into a most providential opportunity to makeover your football persona and add to your legacy, all without having to change your shirt colors. Lloyd Carr - who was a much more successful coach than you've been thus far - would be a good example of a guy who could have benefited from the kind of opportunity you have, I'm sure he wishes he rebooted himself late in his tenure but alas. In any event, you have an opportunity to completely update the décor of your resume and I want to encourage you to proceed with audacity. A lesser man would simply slap on new paint, and trade out carpet for hardwood floors and call himself new and improved. But we both know that's veneer. A bold man tears down the walls of his past, reconsiders and then reconceptualizes his whole configuration and proves he's envisioning the future and is unafraid to make an unashamed break from his past.

See, that's the challenge here. Do you rest on the formula that has secured you arguably the most protected job in the Big Ten, a job that pays you the second highest salary, has provided you with supreme power, and the longest tenure? Or, do you act like a man who has proven all he can within an old paradigm and now wants to prove all he can within a new one? Opportunity is a rare and wonderful thing. You've got it. Now, what are you going to do with it?

Knowing you must make changes to adapt to the evolutionary progress of the game, and being sincere in the process, is only half the battle. It is, at your age, the difficult part though. And don't expect a lot of credit for making any changes either. We both know what changes you make will be the part the press, your critics and the fans focus on. There won't be a lot of backslapping for simply making changes if they just lead to failure. So, you've done the hard part already. You've brought in new people, and new people (if you allow them to share) have new ideas, and as the king you'll get credit for these new ideas, all of them. I'm guessing though that these new people, and even your old people, are unlikely to tell it to you straight about what needs to go.

So, let's start by identifying a few things from your first act that have been, how can I say this...problematic. You know Churchill once said, "Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things." Kirk, we don't have a lot of time here, so I'm afraid I have to punch you in the face with words, because your program has some health issues. Please listen though, not with a defensive posture but with an open heart and mind, and if you do, trust me the pain will eventually subside.

Here we go, in no particular order:

Continue reading this post »

My best friend is the president of a very successful advertising agency. My wife has worked in advertising her entire professional life. I own my own business, and marketing and advertising is the lifeblood of my success. And, lastly, I am one of those boorish devoted fans of Apple products and am so, to be completely honest, because of their slick branding. So, I appreciate as much if not more than the average person, the value (indeed the importance) of branding and advertising in the everyday consumer culture of America. But I find the degree to which the University of Oregon has pimped out its brand vis-à-vis their college athletics to be extraordinary, if not pitiable. Let me explain.

There is a perception out there that college sports in the contemporary age are critical to the branding and brand awareness of a college or university on the whole and a university's sports programs can (and often do) generate tons of free advertising, publicity and aid the marketing bottom line, and are crucial to alumni and donor connectivity. I get that and support that view. But, I think all too often history is ignored in this country and one would hope the one place it might still have a pulse would be a college campus. It is important to remember that the primary reason sports even exist on college campuses is they intended to add value to the educational experience of the participants. In other words, college athletics were always intended to be about an educational experience that focused on competing, learning and serving. It's not particularly controversial to point out that college sports were not intended to be an overtly commercialized enterprise that emphasizes brand, market share and TV ratings. I recognize that they have all too often become just that. But that was not the role they were intended to play in the beginning.

College sports of course must bow to the changing times, and in the economic environment of the past quarter century, many universities have largely realized they need to rely on commercial elements to grow. History and evolution have shown too that college sports can create positive commercial benefits to the broader mission of the institution. But, and this is important I think, these commercial benefits should NOT reflect the primary purpose of the institution. In other words, the University of Iowa should not exist first and foremost as a great commercial enterprise and an exceptional canvas for commercial entities to market their wares; it should exist for the reasons it was founded in the first place, to be an excellent academic institution. But when it comes to the current purpose of the University of Oregon, it doesn't really appear this way at all.

The disappointing impression I am left with as regards the University of Oregon is this: it looks like a gigantic billboard dedicated to the personal and commercial use and appropriation of Phil Knight and his Nike Corporation.

Continue reading this post »

[A BHGP Production Video]

As Ken O'Keefe fades into the sunlight of South Beach we at BHGP take an ever so slender moment to say goodbye and thanks to the offensive coordinator known affectionately, if not a bit sneeringly, as KOK. Ken was a football Rorschach test, and that was in the best of times. He, nevertheless, lasted over a decade in a job few thought he was ever worthy of having.

It's important to note that while Ken has basically vanished into the cold, thin air of Iowa City, Norm Parker, the assistant to whom most Iowa fans would generously lavish praise in the afterglow of a Hawkeye victory, often even at the expense of O'Keefe, is still likely on a contact high from his flattering farewell and closure from the Iowa football community for his many stellar years of service. Ken, meanwhile, leaves town without so much as an informal one-on-one Q&A session from one of the many longtime journalistic cheerleaders who cover the Hawkeyes. Indeed, the formal announcement of O'Keefe's resignation could not even warrant top billing from his own boss. Instead he was forced to ride shotgun to a slew of staffing announcements and ultimately was an undercard to the undercard of the announcement of Phil Parker as, you guessed it, Norm Parker's replacement. Proving the long shadow of the Iowa defensive coordinator job extends even now over it's offensive counterpart. Such was life at Iowa for Ken and ultimately he decided some South Beach sunshine was in order.

Many in Hawkville were a bit surprised that Ken's next move was not at the amateur ranks. He had looked hard a year ago at other college jobs but none were as big time as Iowa and, more importantly, none might have called back. But coaching is a world of trust and fidelity and so Ken was gobbled up by an old working mate as a wide receivers coach for the big boys. It would be foolish to expect Ken to be out of his depth based on his work at Iowa. We may have been shielded from the best of Ken O'Keefe during his decade plus run with the Hawkeyes. We'll likely never truly know where Kirk Ferentz ended and where Ken O'Keefe began when it came to the Iowa offense.

From day one it was fairly obvious that Kirk's hands were in the batter, because of his offensive line expertise and executive privilege. And for the vast majority of years that was most clearly a good thing. The stars of the offense have almost always been over 275 pounds. I wouldn't recommend holding your breath waiting for the KOK tell-all book though so as to get to the bottom of it. Any sort of record of the inner workings of Ken and Kirk's relationship died with Kirk's announcement of Ken's resignation. Company secrets are the lifeblood of the Ferentz corporation and you don't last as long as Ken did if you're a sink ships kind of guy. And now, either despite of or thanks to his working conditions Ken O'Keefe leaves behind years of resourcefulness for the historians to sift through. Most likely though, they won't bother. After all, they're destined to conclude, "it's just Ken O'Keefe." I hope we're wrong on that one, because Ken deserves a moment of attention from even the most hardened hater, things got done in his time and some of those things were more than some around here ever thought possible for the little program that could. But just in case KOK apathy is a greater force than good, here for the masses and Ken (if he's a BHGP lurker), is little virtual sunshine for the man they call KOK, and a little kiss goodbye.

Enjoy, and fare-thee-well Ken Old Buddy.

After 59 days of deliberation Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz is finally ready to share with the world his choice to replace Norm Parker and it is Phil Parker. It is, to be sure, a big day for Iowa's reflective and purposeful coach. In all likelihood, if he has hired well, Parker will be the man that takes Ferentz and the Hawkeyes to the next level of success.

We know today is going to be more than the formal introduction of Phil Parker though. In fact that bit of news turns out to be just the tip of the iceberg, as we now know Ferentz is attempting to completely recreate his staff without bringing in more than a couple of new bodies.

To some today's announcement is likely to be viewed as if Ferentz bought a used table lamp and rearranged some furniture and is now going to try to claim a total makeover. But some might be won over, because if the sofa is comfortable and in good shape why replace it. It should be noted Ferentz is very unlikely to reference this metaphor or any other metaphor.

So what should we look and listen for today as Ferentz announces his new hire and the reorganization of his staff? Let me count the ways:

(after the jump)

Continue reading this post »

"Thanks to the rise of social media, news is no longer gathered exclusively by reporters and turned into a story but emerges from an ecosystem in which journalists, sources, readers and viewers exchange information."

- The Economist, July 7, 2011

By now you may have read the story about a high school football player in New Jersey named Yuri Wright. If you have, that's pretty impressive because Yuri Wright's story has come to light at a time when there are so many Super Bowl and Joe Paterno news stories as to black out the sun, or at the very least, create a total eclipse of any high school football story, and especially the Yuri Wright story.

Yuri Wright (via cdn.bleacherreport.net)

If you haven't read about Yuri Wright here is the deal: A high school football player at an all-boys Catholic high school in New Jersey, which happens to be a national football powerhouse, uses Twitter to publish his daily thoughts. Along the way the football player tweets a string of racist, sexist, and graphically explicit messages, which his high school deems to be so inappropriate they expel him from school before he completes his senior year. This story has become somewhat of a national news story because, I believe, Yuri Wright is a 4-star recruiting prospect and several big time schools that were recruiting him got wind of his expulsion and his crude and offensive tweets and rescinded his scholarship offer. Most notable among those schools is Michigan, but they were not alone.

However, not every university rescinded their offer of a college education to Yuri Wright. In fact, just yesterday Yuri committed to The University of Colorado. Andy Staples of Sports Illustrated wrote about all this earlier this week attempting to, I assume, turn Yuri's story into, more or less, a cautionary tale for prospective recruits about the dangers of tweeting distasteful things. Staples, of course, writes for big corporate media organization and so it is not completely surprising that his slant on the Yuri Wright story represents the point of view commonly espoused by powerful institutions. As Staples wrote:

"Wright committed to Colorado this week. This is not a reason to rip Colorado. Wright didn't commit a crime, after all. Still, the words we type have consequences. The maintenance of my own Twitter feed is not a job requirement, but SI would fire me in a heartbeat if I began unleashing streams of profanity on Twitter. My Twitter feed reflects my personal opinions, but those opinions reflect upon my employer."

Of course Yuri Wright does not work for his high school. He's not employed as a football player (per se) at his private high school, although I guess he might have been there thanks to some sort of financial aid package that was a consequence of possessing above average football prowess. The point is, Staples and others who've made note of Yuri Wright have all contextualized his story in a rather predictable way: Student makes haphazard use of social media and needs to learn to keep his offensive thoughts to himself because words that offend have serious consequence. And all that is well and good, but does little to try to understand the larger picture.

Continue reading this post »

If Kirk Ferentz prefers to keep his staffing plans to himself and make his moves deliberately you can understand why. In the cutthroat world of college football recruitment – not of players but of coaches – tipping your hand can compromise getting your guy. Negotiations have to be handled with subtlety and secrecy so as to not embarrass or be embarrassed should they go awry. But there appears to be a more pragmatic reason why Ferentz has not rushed to fill his defensive coordinator and defensive line coach openings. College football has been busy finishing up its season – not bowl season mind you, but the season of coaching changes – and, no coaching change appears to have more potential impact on Iowa than the one recently completed in Happy Valley.

Continue reading this post »

Welcome to game day.

This morning on ESPN Game Day Kirk Herbstreit and Desmond Howard, both Big Ten guys (meaning they actually pay attention to the conference and its games), predicted the inaugural Big Ten Championship game would pit Ohio State and Iowa. Now, look, that's just a prediction amid the theater of sports television and those guys will explain away why they were wrong next weekend if one or both of those teams lose this weekend. It's worth noting their opinion though and not because of what it tells us about Iowa, but what it tells us about Michigan State and Nebraska---the two teams that are in the best position to thwart Iowa's remaining chance to play in Indianapolis.

Kirk has done well against Mark. He's 4-1 against the conference's biggest gambler. All but last year's game have been razor thin. The Spartans play a style of football of which Iowa fans should approve. They play nose up defense. They desire to run the ball. They want to own a special teams advantage. And when they pass the ball they do it from a pocket, an increasingly lost art or concern among coaches in college football.

But while Michigan State and Iowa offer similar schematic approaches to winning football games they also offer a significant and noticeable difference in game management. Kirk Ferentz is not a "hunch" coach, while Dantonio is very much so. Ferentz likely would not have been interested in guiding his team to a Hail Mary win over Wisconsin, as that was set-up thanks in large part because of an ubber confident and aggressive attitude. Kirk would have gone to overtime with glee. But it is Dantonio's coaching style that has led to MSU getting blown out at times (in four games over the past two years MSU has lost by more than 21 points while Iowa has not lost by more than 10 points in that same span). 

So today's game offers a classic match-up of contrasting styles, one coach endeavors to play the game like an insurance executive, happy to keep it close throughout and do just enough to win at the end; while the other rides the game like a poker player looking for his opportunity to go "all in". As an Iowa fan the latter approach seems intoxicating and Spartan fans could point to the number of wins this approach has produced (two more than Iowa in the last two years) but in a head to head match-up everything changes. The conservative, methodical approach has proven to confound and frustrate the aggressive Dantonio and his players. Will he bring a new attitude to Kinnick? Or will it be business as usual? The Big Ten Championship game, if you believe Herbie and Desmond, is on the line. 

Go Hawks. 

10. Passive - Aggressive. A year ago Michigan was ranked 110th in total defense, they allowed almost 3 ½ miles of yardage on the season and played a defensive alignment that if employed flawlessly is successful only in eight man football. Enter Greg Mattison, the recent Rex Ryan of the Baltimore Ravens, who has given the Wolverines an attitude adjustment. Whereas last year the Wolverines used the football equivalent of the rope-a-dope to defend opponents, this year they are attacking the ball with Ray Lewis-like ferocity and are ranked 28th nationally in total defense and 6th in scoring defense. On Saturday expect the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders to label the Hawkeyes...losers.

9. Midnight Hour. Iowa averages almost 100 fewer rushing yards per game than does Michigan and any layperson can see why. Iowa models its approach on a sort of reverse Cinderella fable, when the clock strikes "fourth quarter" they abandon the run offensively and simultaneously avoid tackling the opposition. After watching Iowa's defense wilt in the final quarter at Penn State and last week to a one-dimensional Minnesota run game, you can only imagine the fate that lies ahead with the vaunted Wolverine rushing attack coming to town. Expect the slipper to be too big to fill for the bumbling Hawkeyes as the Wolverines race off into the night with a prince of a win.

8. Irresistible Force Paradox. What happens when an irresistible force meets an immovable object? Michigan is #11 nationally in rushing offense while Iowa is #69 in rushing defense. So, from the standpoint of physics logic dictates that it's inappropriate to have these two entities -- a force that cannot be resisted and an object that cannot stop shit -- in the same universe much less on the same football field. In fact, present this match-up as an example to any first-year physics student and he or she is likely to think you've either made an egregious typo or you are fucking with them.

7. Great Scott! Apparently there are great second acts in American lives, as proven by Michigan sophomore running back Fitzgerald Toussaint, who carried the ball twice for 7 yards in a loss against Michigan State only to back that up with a masterpiece the following game. Against Purdue Toussaint ran like a free jazz solo, with spontaneity, vitality and improvisation on his way to a 170-yard performance on only 20 carries. On Saturday expect the Hawkeyes defense to remind you of an Earl Scruggs banjo solo while Toussaint runs around them with the same elegance and sophistication of John Coltrane playing Bye Bye Blackbird.

6. Dog Day Afternoon. Iowa is a 4-point underdog at home this Saturday. This year Iowa is 3-5 against the spread and in the Big Ten only Penn State is worse against the spread than the Hawkeyes --- and one of the two games they did cover? Yep, against the Hawkeyes. A perusal of numerous gambling websites shows that not a single one has listed this game as a possible upset. Moral of this story? Trust the sharks.

5. Beef O'Brady. What chances does an tenured, over-organized, emotionally repressed, gum chewing health nut, with and addition to clichés, have going up against a guy who's in his first-year, is spontaneous, unedited, doesn't wear a head set or tuck in his shirt, and looks like the stunt double for the fat guy from HBO's Curb Your Enthusiasm. Answer? None. Zero. Zippo.

4. Royalty. Most wins in all of college football, all-time? Michigan. Best winning percentage in all of college football, all-time? Michigan. Most wins in the Big Ten, all-time? Michigan. Most national championships by a Big Ten team, all-time? Michigan. Team in which Iowa has it's worst winning percentage, Big Ten? Michigan. You see where this is going, right? Michigan. Most winning seasons, all-time? Michigan. Most undefeated seasons, all-time? Michigan. Shall I keep going? Michigan. Most televised football team, all-time? Michigan. The longest streak of home...

3. Two Faced. Kirk Ferentz is famous for always electing to receive whenever they win the opening coin toss. The rare exception is when weather conditions demand they do otherwise---which is very rare indeed. Despite being a defensive minded coach, Kirk Ferentz has said he elects to receive to maximize the number of possible offensive possessions. However, in all but one game this year when Iowa had the ball with less than two minutes to go in the first half they've chosen to play very conservatively and essentially run out the clock. What this reveals is a coach who really is neither here nor there. On Saturday expect Michigan to definitely kick the crap out of the indecisive Hawkeyes.

2. Shoe Shines. Michigan quarterback Denard Robinson is a faster, more agile, more elusive runner than Marqueis Gray, with better vision and a better offensive line. Given Iowa's success against the practice squad version of a running quarterback, expect the Hawkeyes to get waxed, pasted or creamed on Saturday.

1. Cover 2. Need I say more?

10. Maroon Tape. In the spring of 1880, University of Minnesota President William Watts Folwell asked an English instructor, Mrs. Augusta Smith, to select "proper" colors to use for graduation ribbons and other occasions. She chose maroon and gold. As the years passed and without any kind of formal action, maroon and gold became the University of Minnesota's official school colors. In other words, Minnesota doesn't need process, procedure or formality. Expect Iowa to get mired in it's own tedious, pedantic, exceedingly bureaucratic approach to preparation while Minnesota spontaneously kicks the living shit out of them.

9. The (Jerry Kill)ing Moon.

Fate
Up against your will
Through the thick and thin
He will wait until
You give yourself to him
You give yourself to him

La la la la la...

8. Give me a T! One of the most visible traditions in sports was born more than 100 years ago at the University of Minnesota. In the fall of 1898, student Johnny Campbell offered to lead organized cheers at football games. This offer came after three straight losses, and a subsequent editorial in the school paper that said, "Any plan that would stir up enthusiasm for athletics would be helpful." Campbell had a plan, he would begin to lead organized cheers at the home game against Northwestern. Minnesota won 17-6, and much of the credit went to Campbell and his "yell leaders." History now shows it was that late-season game where the tradition of cheerleading was born. Prepare for this week's organized cheer from the Gopher faithful to be, "TWO-PEAT."

7. Bank Bailout. Twin City Federal Bank Coca-Cola Dairy Queen Stadium is the University of Minnesota's on-campus football stadium. In their move to "The Bank" Minnesota finally abandoned the distinction of being the only Big Ten team without its own dedicated on-campus football stadium---however they're now the only school to whore out sell the naming rights of their stadium. It's that kind of strategic mass marketing of a corrupt regional bank best known for trying to block the Durbin Amendment (which seeks to cap debit card interchange fees) and junk food that proves yet again the degree to which the University of Minnesota will stop at nothing to prove their superiority as a public educational institution. On Saturday expect the Hawkeyes to make another huge deposit into the Gopher's "win" account.

6. Road Kill. It is estimated that 15% of all dead animals struck and killed by motor vehicles each year are birds. In their last four road efforts, dating back to last year, the Hawkeyes have ended up either decomposing on the side of the road or as taxidermy. Now comes a motivated Jerry Kill, freshly signed to a new 7-year contract, firmly ensconced as Minnesota's new head coach, and more healthy than at any other time this year (he's seemingly has his seizures under control again). Nothing spells trouble more than going up against a revitalized coach leading a team with good memories of their opponent, at home. On Saturday expect the Hawkeyes to be left lying just off I-35, after being run over by the Gophers.

Continue reading this post »

10. The Hawkeye Redemption. In their last six meetings with Iowa the Northwestern Wildcats have shown an almost Andy Dufresnesque commitment to deception. The Wildcats have won five of six from Iowa by lulling the unsuspecting Hawkeyes into a false sense of security by playing absolutely awful the week prior. In some years the commitment to hoodwinking the Hawkeyes has been nothing short of genius, and certainly a testimony to their persistence and dedication. For example, in 2006 the Wildcats lost six straight games to convince the Hawkeyes they'd abandon hope and accepted their fate as a loser, then, of course, they came to Iowa City and thumped the Hawkeyes. This year's illusory act included losing to Army, an miserable team that's been able to win but one other game. Last week the Wildcats raced out to a lead against Michigan to showcase another facet of their deception, the total and complete defensive collapse. Expect Northwestern to tunnel their way out of Kinnick with a win this Saturday and then, having successfully accomplished their season's sole mission, spend the rest of the year sunbathing in Zihuatanejo (which is a euphemism for "losing every other game").

9. Achilles Latest Stand. In Greek mythology, when Achilles was a baby his mother Thetis took him to the River Styx whose waters possessed powers of invincibility. Once there she dipped his body into the water but as she held him by his heel her hand prevented it from being washed over by the water of the magical river. Achilles grew up to be a strong Northwestern quarterback who survived many great battles. But one day, an Iowa defensive lineman attacked his heel, killing his career shortly thereafter. Or so it seemed, this Saturday expect Northwestern's god of passing and scrambling to have arrived from the heavens to wreak pain and eternal grief upon his enemy Hawkeyes.

8. Line in The Sand. Talented, fast, strong, lauded and NFL bound. That's Iowa's defensive line from a year ago, and that group couldn't do squat to contain Dan Persa. This year's Iowa defensive line rushes and contains the quarterback with all the urgency of a Maui Beach Hilton conga line. This Saturday expect the Hawkeyes defensive linemen to form a long processing line and lead the team on a shuffle dance to a 3-3 record.

7. Clockwork Red. If the Hawkeyes are somehow able to keep it a one score game and get possession of the ball with less than two minutes remaining then expect fireworks, on the Northwestern side of the field that is, as the Wildcats celebrate early knowing that Kirk Ferentz is about as eager to call on a two-minute offense with the game on the line as Alex DeLarge was at being kind to strangers.

6. Flight Club. Watching Iowa's offense work out it's identity crisis is like watching Tyler Durden, one series it's Project Mayhem and the next it's like a support group meeting. Expect Northwestern to take Iowa into a basement this weekend and kick the living shit of them.

Continue reading this post »

"Iowa's a wrestling school, and Penn State's a football school, so we've got to take it to them. They [the fans] think they have this stranglehold on us, and we just have to humble them up a bit."

- Penn State linebacker Glenn Carson

Under sunny skies near famed Mount Nittany in a stadium modeled, it would seem, after a 1980s municipal garage in downtown Detroit, the Iowa Hawkeyes made its case --- among all it's athletic endeavors football is the university's diversion sport. How else could one explain their performance on Saturday?

Nittany Lion fans will tell you, as they told me on Saturday, their team is a defensive juggernaut and to not be too discouraged. If only that were true. Sitting in the stands (I attended the game with BHGP member Bellanca) revealed many things about both teams, but it did not show a Penn State defense of a merciless destructive force. I found the Penn State defense to be well coached and balanced but not particularly fast, athletic or even of great size and strength. Were they the best defense the Hawkeyes have faced this season? Without a doubt. What was apparent as the game wore on was this defense was more prepared for the game than was the Iowa offense. They executed a very good game plan and it was the difference in the game. Iowa had no answers. Proving that an extra week of preparation might be vastly overrated. 

Playing after a bye week in college football, for some reason, is tricky business. Countless articles on gambling sites will point out that whether playing as a favorite or underdog, road teams after a bye week perform miserably against the spread. College football coaches, on the other hand, would mostly tell you they covet bye weeks --- a week to rest up injured players, work out some trouble spots that have been showing up on the field, and look ahead to the next opponent and get an early start on game preparation. Bye week or no bye week, the Penn State game was vital to Iowa's position as a serious threat in the Leaders Legends division of the B1G. Knowing if they were able to win in Happy Valley they would return to four home games in their next five contests, with their lone road game in that stretch being at reeling Minnesota, had to be seen as a great opportunity to seize momentum for the season ahead. Momentum is not to be though, and instead the Hawkeyes return to Iowa City with more questions than answers as they prepare for their personal Rubik's Cube, the Northwestern Wildcats.

Over the next 24-48 hours BHGP will break down the failure in Happy Valley in painful detail, as you well know. But one thing we can say right now, with little opposing convincing argument, is that Iowa's not a particularly good team right now and may not have the horses to be much more than they were this past weekend. Northwestern is now an even more serious threat, as will be every remaining team on the schedule.

Can Iowa reassert itself as a contender for the division crown? It would be reckless to say no. After all, they've yet to play a single game against teams in their division, but on paper they do not match up well with most, if not all of them. This season, more so than most it would seem, will require excellent game planning and preparation, passion and focus by the players, and some very good fortune---all things I did not see against Penn State.

Some notes from Beaver Stadium:

• Penn State fans are extremely respectful. Not once did I witness anything less than genuine appreciation for Iowa fans and even during the game they remained humble, almost deferential. This is not a hubristic program. Joe Paterno's legacy as a leader, more than possibly his record of on-the-field achievement, is that he's served as a tremendous model for the Penn State football community. I would return to watch Iowa play here in a New York minute.
• Iowa looked very casual warming up and on the sidelines during the game. Energy was surprisingly low and players were milling around like it was a scrimmage. It might have been the pace of the game, which was often disjointed or it might have been Iowa's lack of success offensively. Bear in mind, before Vandenberg's fumble in Penn State territory at the start of the fourth quarter, this game was surprisingly in doubt. It might be a stretch to say Iowa was overconfident but player sideline demeanor was not a promising sign from where I was sitting.
• There were about 4,000 - 6,000 Iowa fans at the game from what I could tell.
• One many, many occasions I saw a fan wearing an Iowa football jersey but upon further inspection I realized they were actually wearing a Pittsburgh Steelers jersey.
• I noticed that as the game wound to a close Joe Paterno was whisked from the sidelines, presumably out of fear for the chaos that often ensues at the end of games. Ferentz met and shook the hand of an assistant coach at the end of the game, before sprinting alone to the locker room.

10. Two and Half Men. While most teams frantically search during fall camp to find a reliable starting quarterback to start their season, often with the same mania as a crack addict rummaging between sofa cushions to find quarters to fund his fix, the Penn State Nittany Lions have no such concerns. They've taken a trip to bountiful and returned with two impressive, although very dissimilar quarterbacks. They also have a 5-star QB recruit sitting on the bench for good measure. Most teams would blush at such riches, but the Nittany Lions and their fans are hardly shy about their glee. Expect Penn State to find ways to get them all in the game on Saturday as Iowa is confounded to the point of bemusement.

9. Charm School. Penn State linebacker Glenn Carson was asked during the week to assess the Hawkeyes and decided on describing them this way, "Iowa's a wrestling school. Penn State is a football school. We have to take it to 'em." While it is true Iowa silenced the Nittany Lions on the road before a sellout crowd in their most recent wrestling dual meet, nothing enrages an Iowa fan more than to have their university unfairly labeled a "wrestling school." Okay, so Iowa wrestling has won 23 National Championships since 1975, while Penn State football has won two, but that's the kind of low blow that is so offensive and unnerving it crosses the line and is guaranteed to distract the sensitive Hawkeyes. Because everyone knows the Hawkeyes often play before sparse crowds at Kinnick while the wrestling teams packs to standing room only at Carver Hawkeye, and football players routinely lose out on downtown bouncer jobs to wrestling back-ups and walk-ons, so it only stands to reason they're a little insecure about this whole football experiment thingy.

8. Mind The Gap. Penn State coach Joe Paterno is a child of the depression, which is to say he is self-sufficiency meets parsimony meets constancy. Iowa coach Kirk Ferentz, meanwhile, is a child of one of the most affluent periods in American history, the 1950s. These two coaches are separated by arguably the most extreme generational gap of all time, and thus could not be more dissimilar. While Paterno is the embodiment of tried and true block and tackle football and is deeply committed to ground and pound, unadorned uniforms without names displayed on the back, and a preference for players in the senior year, Ferentz's football entitlement program is about as stable as the Romanian tax code (trust me on that one). Ferentz's latest taste in offenses is the uptempo, no-huddle, shotgun passing attack that is in such fashion. He also is in the habit of tossing aside upperclassmen in favor of exciting but unproven true freshmen in an obsession with youth that is only rivaled by Elton John. So don't blink on Saturday because after he activates his new iPhone 4S, Ferentz may just install a wishbone version of the Wildcat with spread formation principles during pre-game drills as the Hawkeyes reveal a new uniform and Ferentz's latest fashion obsession, figure flattering denim. Expect Ferentz's Hawkeyes to arrive fashionably too late this Saturday.

Continue reading this post »

And so it finally begins, the University of Nebraska-Lincoln is at long last ready to play tackle football. This Saturday the Cornhuskers face the Wisconsin Badgers in Madison in their first ever football game as a member of the Big Ten Conference. The day will be historic, ESPN's College GameDay show will be on hand to mark the games importance nationally, a cavalcade of Nebraska dignitaries will be on hand, Wisconsin season ticket holders will be holding on to ticket stubs so they can gouge Nebraska fans on Ebay afterward, and the nation will watch the ceremonial coin toss in prime time, a moment that will mark both the beginning and the end of an era for Nebraska football.

In 1890 the University of Nebraska Bugeaters, as they were appropriately called at the time, played their first so-called football game on a Thanksgiving Day against a team made up of boys from a local organization established to provide rural youth low-cost housing in a safe Christian environment - the Omaha YMCA. Nebraska won of course, 10-0, it was after all men against boys, but they won much more than a game, because it was on that day a relentless dependency was born. In beating up a group of rural homeless boys the Cornhuskers stumbled upon a formula for which the foundation of an entire football program identity would be built. Over the next 120 years Nebraska would unremittingly feed on a steady diet of cupcake opponents to fatten up their football program. While many other successful college football teams could have gone down that same path, they instead, most of them, chose to avert such an approach. But, there is no denying the strategy worked, and in the end beautifully so, because Nebraska was invited to the Big Ten.

After Penn State joined the Big Ten Conference many believed the team that would inevitably be recruited to balance out the conference, make for even numbers and put a period at the end of the Big Ten sentence would be Notre Dame, but the Fighting Irish waived off their opportunity believing that independence provided them more leverage, greater earning potential and a unique platform. It was instead the long shot Cornhuskers who received the coveted invite. The basis for their invitation was not immediately clear to many, it could not be academics because after all Nebraska is not a member of the AAU, and is now the only Big Ten team who does not have membership, nor could it be a function of location or demographics because Nebraska is largely outside the Big Ten footprint and is a state with a population no larger than the Columbus, Ohio metropolitan area. No, Nebraska was invited to the Big Ten for one reason and one reason alone, because of the perception they're a top-flight college football program. 

The road to riches for Nebraska is in their win column. In the history of college football only three programs can boast more victories than the Cornhuskers - Michigan, Notre Dame and Texas. Michigan and Notre Dame have leveraged their national appeal to recruit and build their brand, and in the case of Texas, they've simply tended to arguably the most fertile recruiting grounds in America. Nebraska seemingly lacking in every traditional advantage one associates with college football success has figured another way to build themselves up, and it begins and ends with scheduling. Thirty percent of all of Nebraska's victories, all time, have come against just three historically awful teams: Kansas, Kansas State, and Iowa State. Three programs with even fewer natural resources than the Cornhuskers (remember too that Nebraska does not compete with another state university). These were not out of conference match-ups to limber up for the conference season either; of course Nebraska scheduled those cupcakes too. No, these were teams that made up a sizeable block of the various versions of the Big Eight Conference to which Nebraska was a member for all of two years since 1913. At some points along the way, as Nebraska was adding to their victory tally, Iowa State, Kansas State and Kansas made up nearly 40% of Nebraska's conference schedule. The Kansas-Nebraska game was the longest uninterrupted rivalry in college football until this year. Kansas and Nebraska met for the first time in 1892, and faced off annually since 1906. Over the past 110 years Nebraska has faced off against Iowa State 101 times and against Kansas State 95 times. That is a lot of good eatin.

It wan't just these weak three nourishing the Nebraska record though, the Cornhuskers have feasted on numerous over-matched out of conference opponents as well, teams that have overtly played football as an afterthought. And while that tactic is a well worn, nearly universally shared approach to out-of-conference scheduling, no FBS program has more unashamedly avoided real tackle football to the degree that Nebraska has. In examining a list of the all-time leading NCAA Division I FBS college football single-opponent winning streaks (ranked by the number of consecutive wins posted by one team against a specific opponent), the Cornhuskers own two of the top five (Kansas and Kansas State) and five of the top 20. Only Penn State is as excessive as the Cornhuskers in this regard, as they're listed three times as well (and they too leveraged it to gain access to the Big Ten). One would think if your conference tests are largely a joke you would add some gristle to the out-of-conference schedule.

Continue reading this post »

In honor of a few of the more enjoyable films from the decade that brought you the end of the Cold War, the dawn of the postmodern age, the reappearance of flannel shirts, the promotion of multiculturalism, the cloning of sheep, and Mad Cow....the 1990s!

10. Dumb and Dumber. Ken O'Keefe and Kirk Ferentz are not only coaching colleagues, they're nearly lifelong bosom buddies who've each filled a suitcase full of money convincing Iowa football fans that boring football is, in fact, enjoyable football. These two have talked deep into the night debating and fantasizing about the perfect situation for a third down punt. Despite their chummy insistence on an offensive philosophy that limits Iowa to a million-to-one long shot to ever win the National Championship, Hawkeyes fans will all tell you they're just happy "there's a chance." Although, this Saturday when the Hawkeyes host the University of Louisiana-Monroe (ULM) at Kinnick, there really is no chance.

9. Groundhog Day. After playing nine straight quarters of uninspired and unimpressive football the sun finally came out for the Iowa Hawkeyes offense last Saturday as they put together a scintillating fourth quarter comeback against the Pittsburgh Panthers. This Saturday as the crowd awaits their beloved Hawkeyes to take the field, expect Iowa to emerge from the tunnel, see their shadow, and return to sucking and six more weeks of shitty football.

8. The Sixth Sense. No coach is more comfortable relying upon what psychologist J. B. Rhine formally termed as Extrasensory Perception (ESP) or what others simply call clairvoyance. Kirk Ferentz summons his unique precognition ability throughout a football game as he navigates his way through the crucial decisions that separate wins from losses. While other coaches meticulously analyze the endless possibilities and then create decision cards and the like, on game day Ferentz steps onto the field with the only thing he's ever needed, his gut. This Saturday, like every Saturday, the Hawkeyes will live or die by Ferentz's hunches, and knowing that...I see dead people.   

7. Light Sleeper. Over the past few years when it comes to scheduling, ULM is not afraid to do some heavy lifting. They've played road games at Alabama, Arkansas, Arizona State, Clemson, Georgia, Texas A&M, and this year they've warmed up for their visit to Kinnick by adding Florida State and TCU to the bar. In comparison to those heavy wieghts, playing Iowa will feel like warming up with a batting doughnut. Expect Iowa to look like a bunch of dumbbells this Saturday as ULM feels little resistance on the way to a win.

Continue reading this post »

"Close games are won and lost on leadership." - Pittsburgh coach Todd Graham

"They absolutely could not run the ball." - Graham

"We were trying to throw our whole passing game at them." - VDB

"Guys were fatigued a little bit." - Graham

"In the gun I do feel comfortable." - Iowa quarterback James Vandenberg (VDB) on playing under center vs. out of the shotgun

"They left a LB on him." - VDB on the two touchdowns to Martin-Manley

"It was different and that's what probably won us the game, being different" - Keenan Davis on relying on the no huddle offense late in the game

"We're not against being uptempo." - Ferentz

"We practiced a lot in camp, but we really didn't practice it the last couple weeks." - Davis on the no huddle offense

"The other thing, too, up tempo could be three plays and you're out pretty quickly." - Ferentz

10. Rushing Roulette. Tony Dorsett, Craig "Ironhead" Heyward, Curvin Richards, Curtis Martin, LeSean McCoy, Dion Lewis and now Ray Graham. Few teams have more consistently or effectively found and exploited talent at the running back position than the Pittsburgh Panthers. While Iowa defenses have had a remarkable run of success the past few years in stopping the run, all bets are off with this dude. This Saturday expect Graham to rush for a total yardage amount that has a "00" attached to it as the house losses big.

9. Dream Time. Iowa has played six straight games against FBS opponents in which the difference in the final score has been a mere five points or fewer. Each game has gone down to the last possession and clock management has played a crucial role in determining the final outcome for the Hawkeyes, of which they've ended up on the losing side in four of the six. To better manage these last minute situations Kirk Ferentz will be utilizing a new strategy he devised over the summer on a recruiting trip after watching Inception at a Motel 6 on pay-per-view with Ken O'Keefe. The details of the strategy are top secret and will be unveiled on Saturday to be sure, but I can report that the totem Ferentz has chosen is an egg timer from Target, which is....troubling.

8. Fast Times at Kinnick. When Pittsburgh head coach Todd Graham was hired by Tulsa in 2007 the former defensive coordinator knew right away to be successful his offense needed to be one in which he would hate to coach against. He hired offensive savant Gus Malzhan away from the University of Arkansas and preceded to learn from the best at how to build the ultimate no-huddle, high intensity offense that would prove to be a nightmare for defenses. Under the pressure of Pitts offensive intensity this Saturday, expect to see the Hawkeyes defense resemble most 1980s teen sex comedies, which is to say while you watch the game you'll laugh plenty and be grossed-out more than a few times while the Hawkeyes put their screwball antics on display. It will all end in a soft-core sex scene on the scoreboard with Iowa losing their virginity for the second time in a week.

Continue reading this post »

10. The Gods Must Be Crazy Cruel. When Mika'il McCall fell to the ground clutching his ankle it was déjà vu all over again for Hawkeyes fans. Iowa is apparently still settling its bill with the Gods for being given the best running back in the nation just three seasons ago. Blame it on inflation or loan shark rates, but in the last two seasons Iowa running backs have been sacrificed at an alarming rate. But whereas the Gods used to seek out more seasoned sacrifice, they now like their running backs fresh. Consider this, they took out McCall in his first ever college game, before him academic concerns prevented Rodney Coe from making it to campus out of high school; and Michael Malloy, who recently accepted a scholarship offer from Hawkeyes, may not even make it out of high school before his Iowa career is cut short. Yeah, even the innocent act of accepting a scholarship offer will enrage the Gods. If the Hawkeyes are smart they'll move Marcus Coker to linebacker this week, offer up Jason White and a loss to Iowa State to the ravenous Gods this Saturday, and then promise to run five-wides the rest of the season to, if nothing else, spare the career of some poor eighth grader somewhere.

9. Jantz To The Wall. Last Saturday the Cyclones had just given up an inexplicable and seemingly crushing 80-yard touchdown pass, and the lead, to Northern Iowa with less than five minutes left in the game, and at that moment all seemed lost. ISU had sauntered through the motions for 55 minutes and done little to convince anyone they were focused on the task at hand. But then QB Steele Jantz led Iowa State on a ballsy 9-play 60-yard drive for the winning score. Jantz did the honors by sneaking the ball into the end zone himself and with that the man of steele announced his arrival onto the college football scene. Expect Jantz to steal his next victory on Saturday from the favored Hawkeyes by click clacking them into submission with his iron and tungsten cojones.

8. Home Care. When the Iowa State Cyclones line up against the Iowa Hawkeyes for the 34th consecutive time since the renewal of this storied rivalry, it's probably fair to say Cyclones will be more invested in the outcome. According to Andrew Logue of the Des Moines Register, 54 of Iowa State's 131 players (or 41%) are homegrown, while only 43 of 113 (38%) of Iowa's players are from instate. That 3% corn fed advantage will likely play a huge role in determining the degree of interest, passion and determination each team will attempt to muster to ultimately win this game. Consider this too, Paul Rhoads was born and raised in Iowa while Kirk Ferentz merely has an office there. This Saturday, with the state up for grabs, don't expect the interlopers to make much of a difference because this is an Iowa thang.

7. Twin Peaks. The wide receiver tandem of Darius Darks and Darius Reynolds are Iowa State's twin brothers from another mother and their ability to catch the ball is surreal. On Saturday expect the duo to turn an expected Iowa State loss into a mysterious, bewildering Cyclone win shrouded in ambiguities and non sequiturs --- an experience for the Hawkeyes where the macabre and the mundane are juxtaposed to create a dreamlike experience for their players and fans that is, ultimately, all too real. In the final scene Collin Sleeper will be lying in the end zone after allowing a 50-yard desperation heave to be caught simultaneously by the Darius's, a catch that will become, inevitably, a permanent first clip on every Cyclone highlight reel from now until they drop football in 2015. As Sleeper lies on the field he's heard muttering in his sleep, "My dog barks some..." while rabbits eat away at the carcass of Shaun Prater who is lying just a few feet away after his heart has exploded with grief, all to a soundtrack by Angelo Badalamenti.

Continue reading this post »

Diner:  Excuse me, waiter.

Waiter:  Yes?

Diner:  Are there any specials this evening?

Waiter:  Oh, yes. We have an appetizer special from Iowa. It's a small state university covered in a smaller state university, served on a small field with a tiny morsel of out any television coverage (7:00pm on Webcast).

Diner:  Your sure there isn't any television coverage with that dish?

Waiter:  I'm sure and if there is, you can hardly see it.

Diner:  Do you recommend it? I don't, unless you're in the mood for something bland that will likely have you shitting like a mongoose the next day.

Diner:  I'm not sure about that one ...

Waiter:  We also have two entrée specials. First, is a dog and horse dish. It's a delicacy in Georgia. (8:00pm on ESPN and ESPN3). It's tasty but I recommend our other entrée special, the Duck. 

Diner:  Oh, duck? How is it prepared?

Waiter:  It's Cajun style with a slight southwest flavoring (8:00pm on ABC).

Diner:  It all sounds quite good, but I'm a vegetarian.

Waiter:  Then I suggest Rice and I'll ask the chef to leave the steak off the plate (8:00pm on Longhorn Network)

As always: No racism, no sexism, no homophobia, no pornography, no illegal internet streams of the games.  Go easy on the religion and politics, too.  We're here for the football, yeah?  Also, in threads like these that will get very, very busy, a little consideration goes a long way: try not to post gigantic images or a ton of .gifs and when you do post images PLEASE make sure to put something in the subject line (even "." will do) so that your comment can be hidden/minimized.

In the beginning, when God created Iowa (and earth)…and the earth was without form or shape, with darkness over the abyss and a mighty wind sweeping over the plains. Then God said: Let there be light, and there was light. God saw that the light was good. God then separated the light from the darkness. God called the light "Marvin McNutt," and the darkness he called "AIRBHG."

Iowa wins as expected but loses yet another promising young running back in the process. But, injury, rain, lightning and and likely some flooding cannot take away all the good though. McNutt looks to be in midseason form. James Vandenberg was effective and comfortable and the defensive backfield was a terror. Ross will have a thorough recap later on, but let's now turn our attention to the rest of the football world.  

SMALL print: No racism, no sexism, no homophobia, no pornography, no illegal internet streams of the games.  Go easy on the religion and politics, too.  We're here for the football, yeah?  Also, in threads like these that will get very, very busy, a little consideration goes a long way: try not to post gigantic images or a ton of .gifs and when you do post images PLEASE make sure to put something in the subject line (even "." will do) so that your comment can be hidden/minimized.

10. No Stretch of the Imagination. For the past five years Iowa has opened against a Football Bowl Subdivision (FBS) team that is usually perceived to be of a cakey consistency as a way to, more or less, limber up for the arduous season ahead. But, any attempt by Iowa to perform some light stretching against a talented FBS team should evoke memories of two years ago when the Hawkeyes nearly lost to Northern Iowa. Tennessee Tech, this year's assumed walkover, is hardly pound cake. The Golden Eagles beat a celebrated Jacksonville State team less than a year ago; yep, the same Jacksonville State team that beat Mississippi in Oxford a few weeks earlier. Tennessee Tech returns all eleven starters from last year's offense and has the size to play defense against an Iowa running game. If the game gets tight this Saturday, and you just know that it will, expect the Hawks to pull a hammy while attempting to hurdle stretch their way to victory against the Tennessee Technological University Golden Eagles.

9. A Van Down By The River? Iowa is relying upon a quarterback whose greatest claim to promise is throwing multiple interceptions in an overtime game against Ohio State, including a game ender. Sure, James Vandenberg did some nice things on the road, in a hostile setting against a highly ranked team. But playing for a team loaded with All-American and All-Big Ten talent will make anyone look good. And, truthfully, had Derrell Johnson-Koulianos not returned a kickoff for an improbable and crucial fourth quarter touchdown, Iowa might have lost that game by three scores or more. Instead, Iowa was able to continue to run the ball, which allowed for Vandenberg to mount a key drive using play action passing. But, that was over a full season ago. In the meantime, Vandenberg's highlight reel includes a scramble for a first down in a blowout win against Eastern Illinois and then, well, I guess some creative use of an eraser while charting plays. Not exactly the basis for inspiring leadership. Expect Iowa to need a Matt Foley motivational speech in order to have any chance to win on Saturday.

8. 60 Minutes. Tennessee Tech describes their offense as "The Fastest 60 Minutes in Football." Meanwhile, the Iowa Hawkeyes defense over the past few years has been, too often, Dickensian in their efforts to defend against a no huddle offense, "It was the best of times" is usually followed by, "it was the worst of times." Take the Northwestern game last year as a model of what to expect on Saturday: 50 minutes of relentless defensive command and control followed by 10 minutes of chaos, exhaustion and fatigue all leading to the evaporation of a comfortable lead and, eventually, an unbearable loss. If any defense lends itself to the master scheme of the hurry-up using five-wides, it is Iowa's. On Saturday expect the Hawkeyes to look like Morley Safer after a three-day bender.

Continue reading this post »

He is Iowa's all-time leader in receiving yards and career receptions. He led the Big Ten in kick return yards per game in 2010. He played quite well in the NFL Players Association Game, formerly known as the Texas vs. The Nation All-Star game, a game created expressly so that pro football scouts can evaluate talent that's not invited to the selective NFL Combine. Yet, he cannot even get a sniff from the National Football League, presumably because on December 7, 2010 Derrell Johnson-Koulianos, or DJK as he is widely known, was arrested on a slew of drug related charges to include the incendiary charge of "keeping a drug house." As sensational as his arrest was, and it was a doozy in the Iowa community, he ultimately pled guilty to only one of those charges, misdemeanor drug possession. 

The judge cited Johnson-Koulianos' clean record in agreeing to a plea that led to all other charges being dropped and providing a pathway for his record to be expunged. He needs merely to stay "clean" for one year and in the eyes of the law, if he is successful, none of this ever happened. Was it an uncharacteristic mistake? Hard to say. Although, DJK played for five years at Iowa and not once was he cited for any mischief prior to his arrest last fall. In all his time at Iowa, other than the December 2010 drug arrest, his most serious transgression, and it was very serious, was that his personality was too big for Kirk Ferentz.

The NFL is a league that has a long, rich history of drafting or signing players who've exercised highly questionable judgement. Indeed, the NFL has drafted players who've failed drug tests literally days before the draft (Christian Ballard, in fact, failed a drug test at this year's NFL Combine yet was drafted in the 4^th round), but that's not all! The NFL has also found a home for players who've been cited for drunk driving while in college (too many to list here), been arrested for drug possession while in college (Cedric Benson is a recent example), been arrested for committing violent crimes (sometimes against women) of every conceivable variety while in college, and they've signed players who are just plain thieves. Yet, Derrell Johnson-Koulianos and his soon-to-be-cleared misdemeanor criminal record is apparently a bridge too far. Really? It's more than a little confusing because as an example of just how flimsy the NFL's "Character Matters Here" stance is, consider that as of this post the San Francisco 49ers are working with Jeremiah Masoli, a spread-only QB (of middling talent IMO) who they've signed to a free agent contract, and a guy who's been arrested twice (so far) for robbery --- he was incarcerated after his first arrest and kicked off his college football team as a result of his second --- he's evidently admissible, but not DJK? 

[More after the break. A lot more.]

Continue reading this post »

The 2011 Big Ten Media Days marks the coming out party for the conference's latest in a distinguished line of half-witted head football coaches. The conference that in the past decade has brought you coaching gold, the likes of Ron Zook, Bill Lynch and Tim Brewster, now welcomes to the fold Ohio State's visiting head coach, Luke Fickell.

A standout nose tackle at Ohio State in the 1990s, Fickell, to everyone and no one's amazement, amounting to less than zero in the pros having never sniffed the field (practice field that is) at football's highest level. This, predictably, hastened his return to the motherland of practically all aimless Buckeyes, the comfy confines of Columbus, a place Fickell was born, raised, educated and has worked almost exclusively, a place he's domiciled a staggering 35 of his 37 years on earth. Proving the man is nothing if not a poster boy for what William H. Whyte called in the early 1950s rationalized conformity, or groupthink. In a nutshell, by almost any standard and certainly by big time head coaching standards, Fickell has lived an exceptionally sheltered existence that's revolved exclusively around Ohio State football and provincial Columbus, Ohio. Columbus, among the most homogeneous, insulated urban capital cities in America, whose claim to fame these days is being the second manliest city in Ohio, a town where it's impossible to see the college football world as it really is through the required scarlet and grey colored, 3D glasses everyone in that town wears, and the place where Luke Fickell is Ohio State's latest McLuhanesque fish trying to discover water by the Olentangy River.

It's early in his tenure, but Elwood Gordan Gee willing, Luke Fickell will by hook or by crook (oops!) cling to life as Ohio State's head coach, secure a well earned invite to the Dallas Football Classic and then finally put the hurt locker on Florida, as in the University of Central Florida, which would in all liklihood remove that "visiting" tag, allowing the conference to enjoy many more years of quote-worthy gems like these:

On abruptly becoming the visiting head coach of Ohio State:

"I think that's what's been best for me, not to have the ability to sit down and think about the situation that's ahead."

[more after the jump]

Continue reading this post »

Tressel departs Ohio State not as a liar; not as a manipulator and certainly not as a cheater. He leaves a man that cared for people--especially his players--and it's being that man that got him into trouble. He was a man that is larger than life, yet always smaller than the company he kept.

From "Good Guy Gone Bad: The Story of Jim Tressel" by Kyle S. Lamb at ALONG THE OLENTANGY

Why would the coach of the most dominant team in the Big Ten conference feel the need to cheat? By now sensible people agree that the hollow excuse being floated, that Jim Tressel lied to the NCAA to protect his players, is nothing more than a pathetic rationalization of his undeniably improper behavior. Tressel might have lied for a number of complicated or even, as the apologists would have you believe, dignified reasons, but there is no getting around the most important reason: He lied so his players would be eligible to play football. Thus, Tressel lied to gain a competitive advantage. Yep, Jim Tressel lied in order to win games.

Social scientists have studied cheating in a myriad of forms, for many, many years. Fundamentally, cheating is something done willfully and with calculation. Knowledge is a required ingredient. If a person is unaware that what they are doing is against the rules then perhaps an argument can be made they were not cheating. But Jim Tressel knew the rules, and he knew them well, and he nevertheless knowingly broke them. His actions are a clear-cut case of cheating. If his actions were not the quintessential conduct of a cheat, then he may have never been asked to resign, and he certainly would not have tendered a resignation.

As the press, and more importantly, the NCAA continue to investigate this story what is surfacing is providing a window into the mind of Jim Tressel. What we are seeing is Tressel is not a guy who had a brain fart and then engaged in a sequence of panicked decisions. No, Jim Tressel is beginning to look like a serial cheater. What is particularly disturbing is it appears Tressel has chosen to cheat even when it does little, if anything, to advance his team's cause. This kind of behavior suggests something worse yet, that Jim Tressel may even be addicted to cheating. He might be a modern day Arthur Ernest Schlichter of prevarication. As even more information comes to light, and it will, I expect Jim Tressel will go down as one of the, if not the, most legendary cheaters in the history of Big Ten football.

Continue reading this post »

The Iowa Corn Growers Association will replace Hy-Vee as the primary sponsor for the annual Cy-Hawk Series beginning this year, according to a University of Iowa official. The agreement, according to the official, is for four years. The series is expected to be renamed the Iowa Corn Cy-Hawk Series.

I read this yesterday on Scott Dochterman's blog and, well, how do I put this? I beat my wife's cat till it died. Actually, my wife doesn't own a cat. I don't know who the cat belonged to, maybe my daughter. The cat was a really big fat Tabby, apparently it was stuffed. Not after I killed it; before I killed it. The bottom line is I was pissed.

Hy-Vee had been a perfectly good sponsor of the Cy-Hawk Series and I had grown very fond of their affiliation with this great American group of events, highlighted of course by one event that anyone cares about --- the football game (although I got into the dual meet in swimming one year...which we won). Like most people, and by most people I mean you, Hy-Vee's affiliation was the draw for me. As an example, I'm a near fanatical fan of college football, and the Iowa Hawkeyes in particular, but Hy-Vee's sponsorship of the Cy-Hawk Trophy football game put that event over the top for me. Knowing the Hy-Vee sponsorship was in place made-me-want-to-watch.

Continue reading this post »

Trying to get a group of men to agree on a single definition of manhood, I think we can all agree, is pure folly. But then again, no real man would seek out collaboration to arrive at this answer in the first place (or use the word "folly" for that matter). The definition of manhood has been endlessly discussed and interminably dissected in scholarly tomes and surveying that literature would approach omphaloskepsis, so instead, I'm just going to build on my own notions of manliness and my definition is actually quite straightforward.

Manhood is the opposite of womanhood, right? At least that's what I think the Bible tells us. Besides that being a crudely dichotomous position, it's not a very interesting or helpful definition. Manhood is actually the opposite of childhood. A child is self-absorbed, fearful, and dependent. A man, and certainly a man's man, is bold, courageous, and independent. Thus, we know a man has become a man when he's matured and left behind his childish things. At least this is how I like to think of manhood.

So what does all this manhood hoohaw have to do with the question of who will be the next great Iowa quarterback? Because unlike in the professional football ranks where a team can secure the rights to a fully matured and highly accomplished quarterback to lead their team (and can do so in a pinch if needed...see the Philadelphia Eagles signing of Jeff Garcia in 2006 for example), in the collegiate game quarterbacks must be nurtured and cultivated from boys to men. Building a successful quarterback is a time consuming if not arduous process. No matter how lauded, high school quarterbacks are begin as Sunday drivers and their potential is as reliable as a 10-day weather forecast. Toss in the disappointing reality that today's man has become increasingly resistant to growing up, and you have a potential for crisis every time you lose your ripened starting quarterback. And that's the situation the Iowa Hawkeyes find themselves in today.

Movement from back-up quarterback to full-time starter is extreme and fraught with challenges, both physical and mental, and it will lay bare the truest nature of any emerging man. It would be a mistake to think because we've had a glimpse of James Vandenberg in action, no matter how extraordinary the circumstances under which he has performed, that the interview is over and we can comfortably line him up as the next great Iowa quarterback in waiting. We don't, well, I don't know nearly enough to feel that way. Not by a long shot.

Continue reading this post »

As the Iowa Hawkeyes football program inexorably moves toward closure for the 2010 season, the transition to 2011 is still not complete. The first stage is over--draft decisions for underclassmen--but now comes transfer decisions, and the always mysterious signing day for high school recruits. All of which helps us to forget the more disappointing details of the past season, allowing them to slowly retreat from our collective memories. College football fans are well aware their beloved teams must move on and undergo a certain amount of turnover as one season concludes and next takes shape. The lifecycle of college football is one of the sport's most thrilling features. We follow with fascination as young players develop to become major contributors and cringe when others plateau and fail to meet our expectations. While there is considerable ebb and flow among the players, under Kirk Ferentz Iowa has managed to maintain unequaled stability among its coaching staff.

The weeks between the Minnesota game and the Insight Bowl saw the emergence of potentially the most widespread fan base dissatisfaction with Kirk Ferentz as there has ever been after a winning season. Unmet expectations led to grumbling and even calls for serious and meaningful change within the program. Player suspensions only amplified the chorus. However, it seems all it took was a victory in the Insight Bowl to extinguish the fire of the disapproval. Now, nary a word is written pondering the job security of Kirk or even those on the staff.

Continue reading this post »

[Editors note:  You must read the first and second half BCS Championship Game open threads for the backstory.]

Name:

Pelican Whore

Age:

21 years old (42 in human years)

Born:

Whitefish Bay, The U.P., Michigan

Mascot jobs:

• Lake Superior State University, cross-country (unofficial)
• Sheboygan South High School, football
• Tulane University, all sports
• Yakult Swallows, Japanese Baseball League (back-up)
• Yokohama Kentucky Fried Chicken, print commercial

USA Today once called mascoting one of the ten worst jobs in sports. If it's not unruly fans, it's searing heat or frigid weather and the threat of sideline collisions which tests the staying power of even the most loyal mascot. Some mascots are able to have long, successful careers moving from high school to college and eventually, for a very few, to the pros. But that career path is typically reserved for Lions, Tigers and Bears of the mascot world. That's not to say that an unconventional mascot can't make a living in the fickle world of acting like a fool on the sidelines or a sporting event. BHGP caught up with Pelican Whore, whose once promising mascot career was derailed after a pooping prank against a conference foe.

BHGP: So Pelican Whore, how did it all start?

Pelican Whore: I grew up as an only pelican in a fairly conservative area on the shoreline of the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, near the Ontario border. My father was a greeter at the Porcupine Lodge for many years and my mom scavenged the local church dumpster. I had a pretty happy childhood.

BHGP:  How did you get into mascoting?

Pelican Whore: I used to sit on the seat back of a park bench in Sault Ste. Marie, one day the cross-country coach asked me if I would be his team's good luck charm. I figured why not. Then a year later after a long day of plunge-diving in Lake Michigan I decided to squat on a goal post during an intersectional rivalry game between South High School and Landmark Christian Academy in Sheboygan, Wisconsin. Late in the game I started drying my wings during a point after attempt and distracted the LCA kicker. He missed the game winner and a star was born.

Continue reading this post »