I was over at CFB Stats, browsing through the Longhorns' split offensive numbers, and, to be as gentle as possible, the rushing numbers aren't just bad; they are putrid. Texas enters the NCG with the following numbers:

485 attempts for 1985 yards, an average of 152 .69 YPG, and about 4 per carry.

However, dig a little deeper, into those numbers against teams with winning records:

VS the 6 teams with winning records, the 'Horns average a mere 2.7 per carry (219 attempts) for a total of 592 yards and 98.67 ypg.

But, there is a huge difference between a 7-5 team and a team that's actually ranked right? Dead on.

VS the two currently AP ranked teams the 'Horns have played, the numbers are abominable, and I think _the_ single key to a 'Bama victory are borne out below:

70 carries for a total of 117 yards; 58.5 per game, with an average of 1.67 per carry

Perhaps you were clued in by the openly-reminiscent, misty-eyed Verne and Danielson yesterday. Or, perhaps Tracy Wolfson's eye black gave it away. In any event, this is going to be a long, long week filled with over-the-top fauning, maudlin displays of Tebowlove (tm), and ridiculous pronouncements on all things Tebow.

Today, comes the beginning. From Mr. Forde at ESPN

Generosity of Spirit Sets Tebow Apart

He said afterward that he wants the fans to remember him for "how much I cared." The fact is, fans have never cared so much about a player before.

"I've never seen anything like it," Florida coach Urban Meyer said. "… He's made unselfish kind of a cool thing."

None of us has seen anything like it. What makes Tebow unique in the 140-year history of this game is not just his unquenchable spirit. It's his generosity of spirit. (-emphasis, mine)

This is just the first, but by no means the last, awkward mawkish thing written this week.

Instead of the game of the decade, the battle of #1 and #2, the battle of the two best defenses in football, the battle of Heisman finalists, the second matchup of Meyer-Saban, the seventh meeting between Alabama and Florida in the SECCG. the battle for conference supremacy, the national title implications...we are going to be exposed to nitwit human interest stories and disgusting puffery.

Grab the barf bags.

:

A la AL.Com

"I mean, can somebody stand up and fight for these guys and what they do for the game -- and probably get less for it than anybody?" Saban said.

His voice rising to a shout, Saban pointed to how little the officials make for the trouble, saying, "If I was an official, and I was making what I made officiating because I love the game and I love doing it, and I was getting criticized by the media - including our announcers on TV -- like these guys are getting criticized, I'd step back and say, 'I think I'll go to the lake this weekend. You can have this.' That's what I'd do."

Now, can we put this ridiculous nonsense to rest? People get screwed, and we're still not sure if this was even a hose-job, unlike the no-call PI in 2004, or the no-call push-off offensive PI in 2005. Sheesh.

From RTT, citing Kiffy's Twitter feed:

looking forward to another great practice today and a huge game saturday...also a huge shout-out to Lil Wayne for boosting our street cred!

Can you think of anything piss-your-pants funnier than Lane Kiffin talking about street cred?

Some quick facts from a brotha': First, Lane's upbringin' was hard, so so hard that he grewing up in the suburbs surrounded by the blue-eyed devils of other privileged, white elite kids (with a dad coaching college and pros since Methuselah).  But, man, those streets got him down...Gary? Newark? East St. Louis? Atlanta? Sh**. They ain't nothin' like Bloomington, MN. You know he's gotta' eat, and what better way to put shoes on the baby's feet than earning his  degree in "Leisure Services Management" at Fresno State.

Street creds, yo, street creds. And a "shout-out" to you, Lane.

The girlie and I are currently working on a deal to buyout a real estate/litigation firm on the Big Island (no more midden snowstorms for me, thanks). And, the deal has to be consummated by 12/31/2009. Culturally, it seems a huge jump...much akin to moving to a foreign nation, and becoming an ex-pat. Anything I should know? Does each island have its own vibe? Is the cost of living (milk, gas, etc) really as bad as we've been led to believe? Any advice before we lay out my life's savings would be greatly appreciated...either about becoming a quasi-expat or the Island would be very helpful.

Thanks

THIS (below) came from Kyle's excellent UGA blog, Dawgsports, and is an Ole Miss fan's detailed description of Rebel gameday traditions, NYC tailgating experiences, and why it must be miserable to be an Ole Miss fan (NYC is just an extra layer of hell thrown in for good measure).

11:00 AM – Field a couple of phone calls from friends discussing a wide range of topics, including (but not limited to):
- WHY the Rebels will win today
- HOW the Rebels will win today
- WHY/HOW the shirt I’m wearing will help the team
- What the weather looks like in Oxford (or the site of a road game)
- NOSTALGIA – If we were in Oxford right this minute, exactly where in the Grove would we be standing, what would we be drinking, what would we have eaten for breakfast, etc.
- WHY did Jonathan Nichols miss those two field goals against LSU in ‘03 because we totally would have won an SEC title that year and remember how the center accidentally tripped Eli during the snap on fourth down and how Chris Collins didn’t really step out of bounds on that touchdown pass that was called back AAAARRRGGHHH!

*******

12:00 PM to 2:30 PM – Watch a game between two Big 10 teams that AREN’T Ohio State or Michigan (i.e. Purdue Vs. Wisconsin, Michigan State vs. Wisconsin, etc.) and swear on all that is holy that I already watched these exact teams play this exact game LAST WEEK at noon.

Just a snippet so that I don't rip his content off; go and read the whole thing. It is hilarious.