A little over two months has passed since this edition of 'Ramblings' fell into the black hole of AP posted history. The grunt of free agency activity and the completion of the 2012 draft are in the past, and now it's time for all the AP experts to live up to their end of the bargain. But before we do that, I hope everyone finds the time to give upamtn a call and give him a big ole telephone raspberry. If he's stopped alternating between crying and swearing because the Chiefs didn't take DeCastro he might even answer his phone or put you on the air of his call in program.

Cleveland will NOT trade up to the #2 overall pick to draft Robert Griffin III. They will spend their picks improving the overall talent on their team.

Savant

The Washington Redskins WILL trade up to take Griffon

Savant

Miami will sign Peyton Manning. The Chiefs 2012 opening day starter will be Matt Cassel. (these 2 are tied together. It's all or nothing)

1/2 Savant, 1/2 Crow Eater. But I proclaimed that my 2 predictions would be tied together, so I'll take my lumps with a Crow Eater grade.

The Chiefs will NOT draft Decastro with the 11th overall pick. They will trade down in the draft and select a guard in the second round. (these 2 are tied together. All or nothing)

Okay, slippery slope here. I realize that you may read this as THREE predictions. (No Decastro, Trade Down, and Guard in 2nd round). However, that's not what I was attempting to predict. As you can see from the original quote I was very clear that these TWO (2) predictions were to be tied together. (No Decastro, Wait until the second round to take a guard). I just wasn't very clear about the trade down part not being a prediction, rather a justification for not taking Decastro. Lucky for me, I'm the one judging the statements, because I knew exactly what I meant and thus I'm giving myself a Savant for that one.

Three out of four, with a partially correct fourth. (Damn Broncos, going and ruining everything with their last minute Manning crush!) I will be changing my signature to include the following line:

-2012 NFL Prognosticator Extraordinaire: Savant, Savant, Crow Eater, Savant

Check out how the rest of the AP fortune tellers did with their predictions after the jump. But be warned in advance, everyone does worse than me, everyone. A shout out to stagdsp though. In time, he could take the lead.

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The Saints players involved in the bounty scandal will be disciplined "soon" according to the NFL commissioner. He won't take into account any argument that the players were just doing what their coaches told them to do. (As if anyone would believe that steaming pile of B.S. when there are reports abound of players tossing big money into the pool.) But that's not all the trouble for the Saints. Reports have leaked that Loomis may have had the ability to listen in on the opposing teams locker room from 2002 through 2004 by use of a rewired electronic device.

This all comes on the heels of a year long suspension for their head coach, a six month suspension for the general manager, and an indefinite suspension for the former defensive coordinator. The Saints have also lost half a million dollars to fines, and two second round draft picks due to the scandal known as "Bounty-Gate."

Jerome Simpson, the yet unsigned Bengals free agent, faces a three game ban for violation of the NFL substance abuse policy. Deion Sanders' wife has been arrested on assault charges. The talented corner-back Revis is once again threatening a hold out for a new contract. The Green Bay Packers have cut their starting left tackle just two days before the draft. Dawkins has announced his retirement from football, leaving Denver with a bigger hole in the secondary.

The top rated running back in the draft, Richardson, didn't participate at the combine and was unavailable at his Alabama pro day due to a recent knee surgery. It was not his first knee surgery. He could carry some long term durability concerns. Andrew Luck's throwing motion is long, and could lead to additional problems with ramming his hand into the helmet of defenders and missing time if he can't shorten up the follow through. Mike Adams tested positive for marijuana at the combine. Burfict's long list of cheap fouls and stacked up penalties coupled with his poor showing at the combine and his pro-day have added serious questions about his maturity and NFL readiness. Nebraska's Alfonso Dennard, projected by some to be drafted in the late second round, was arrested five days before the draft for punching a police officer. All the NFL negative news just goes on and on....and on.....and on......

Is it draft day yet? Have the camps started? Does the week leading up to the draft always have to be dominated by saddening or angering stories? Are you tired of it all yet?

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The NFL draft is just over a week away and it wouldn't be pre-draft season without the fans and the media playing the "what-if" game. I'm no exception to the rule, but I won't be discussing the draft at all in this post. Instead, my what if scenarios completely revolve around players on the Chiefs roster. It's time for pure speculation backed only by observation and wild hares hairs that grow both internally and decidedly north of my derriere. (Aren't you impressed by my ability to provide the reader with disgusting mental images? It's a gift. I was born with it. The ability, not the hairs.)

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As a child all the family vacations I ever went on took place in a car or van. Dad would load up the trunk with mismatched luggage while Mom stuffed baggies with various sandwiches, chips, fruit and treats. Ice tea and coffee filled multiple avocado green thermos's (the real stuff, sans disgusting sugar). If my sister and I behaved ourselves we might even get a Coca-Cola at some point in the journey. Needless to say, I never got a Coka-Cola. Not even one time ever. But once, I was hung out the window of the car by my ankles while traveling 55 MPH down the highway because I wouldn't stop mouthing off to my father while he tried to sleep in the passenger seat.

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You just never know where, when, or how inspiration is going to hit you. It might be while overlooking a gorgeous mountain vista view. You could be inspired by the sweet and welcoming sounds of birdsong at the break of dawn. Or your mind may latch onto a nagging idea destined to become more while sitting on a filthy toilet and staring at the place where a wall used to be, with water spraying out of a busted pipe while your remodeling contractor is placed in handcuffs and driven away by the police. Spending twelve or fourteen hours alone in the dark, with only your thoughts and an extremely creative, yet incredibly offensive blue streak of profanity to break the silence might be just what was needed to jump start your creative juices (and since the water line to the toilet is broken too, that's really the only juices you want flowing).

Re-building a football team is just what the word suggests it will be. Knocking down the remnants of a worn out and faulty structure to be replaced with a new and shining effigy to combat sport (that will hopefully someday house a throne). Weather the Chiefs want to admit it or not, the last three seasons at 1 Arrowhead Drive have been a re-build of Kansas City's football program. Everything about the Chiefs has changed in the last few years: owner, general manager, major coaching positions, scouts, players, advertising departments, sales staff, media czar, the stadium they play in, the practice field and weight rooms, and even the building the organization is housed in have all been rebuilt. When you look into the process under a microscope, there are a lot of similarities between the rebuilding of a football organization and re-modeling a public toilet inside a restaurant. (and just like that toilet, many of you will think this article is full of ........ )

Where could I possibly be going with this comparison? There's only one way to find out. Go ahead, push that button and keep reading after the jump. Soap and towels will be provided to wash up afterwards. I promise.

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In homage to the wonderfully talented, witty and frequently temporarily insane MNchiefsfan I bring to you today a twisted version of the 2010 born fanpost series that made this idiot famous didn't have a thing to do with me at all: Arguing with Idiots. As the title of this post suggests, that means I'll be arguing with myself. It won't be anything new or different in my everyday life, as I often over think and question every decision. Just this morning I changed my pants three times while deciding which pair would be best for the day. What makes that twisted is that every pair of pants I own are identical black, cell phone pocketed, Dickies. I eventually settled on the ones with the least number holes in the crotch (3), in case you were wondering. It was a good decision and I'm glad I thought it through. Even one more hole would have caused unwelcome embarrassment while I squatted on the ground leveling all the legs on the dining room tables. A few customers even complimented me on my choice of pants, although I can't be sure they were being genuine. I'm really glad I reversed my decision to wear the last clean pair. I've saved myself a full day before I have to do laundry! Talk about your victories of the week!

There will be a poll for you to vote in, but not until after the jump. And without further ado:

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Bounty-Gate? Really, that's what we're going to call this? Has anyone besides me become irritated with the practice of adding "-gate" to the end of everything that's supposed to be a scandal? I understood the Nixon recording scandal being titled Watergate. After all, the break-in took place of the Democratic National Committee happened at the Watergate office complex; hence "Watergate Sandal." Are there a bunch of audio tapes laying around in Rodger Goodell's office of coaches and players outlining their strategies to use 'bounties' to win games? Did all the conversations take place in the Watergate complex as well? Were all the payout lists written on the backs of Bounty brand paper towels? First things first, bounty-gate is a stupid name for the events that have taken place in NFL locker rooms across this country for longer than anyone wants to admit. Let's call it something else: Awakening.

Please don't fool yourself. This is a public relations disaster for the league. Goodell has risked his job and popularity upon the idea of cleaning up the NFL. He's changed kick-off rules, instituted fines and suspensions, modified what is to be considered a legal hit, and invested huge sums of money in equipment research. All in the name of player safety. The commissioner has made it quite clear through his speech and actions that during his tenure the NFL will become safer place to play. The ten year CBA deal might be the biggest feather in his cap, but player safety represents the whole damn chicken. The 'Awakening' has let all the fans in on a dirty little not-so-secret. NFL football is a violent game played by violent men that are, in fact, trying to hurt each other. It's ALWAYS been true that defensive players are trying to hurt the guys they sack, tackle, dislodge a ball away from, block, and blow-up. Anyone that tries to tell you otherwise is lying or ignorant of the true nature of the game. The 'Awakening' isn't exposing some dark corner of the game or a hidden evil shoved away into some corner that only a minor few have ever taken part in. What it's actually done is to shine a light on just how far apart Goodell's version of football is from that of the players.

All the feathers in all the caps of everyone involved with the CBA aren't going to change the fact that the NFL is violent game in which players are going to get hurt, a lot.

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Draft threads, quarterback debates, positions of need and crazy scenarios galore have been the modus operandi of Arrowheadpride.com 's fanpost section for the greater part of two weeks. Each of us, as individuals, have been fighting to have our opinions and ideas heard about what our Chiefs should be planning for the off season and exactly which players that we should draft or target in free agency.

We all have our favorite positions or players that we rank as the most important to address before the beginning of the 2012 season. We've each gone round and round with our personal web site nemesis or nemiesises? nemeseas? nemeses? Oh nemermind, you get the idea. We argue college statistics, combine measurables, or eye test grades with each other concerning one player or another. Each of us have our favorites and each of us have tried to convince others that we're right, and they're wrong about one player or another.

All the player discussions, article links, and graphed out statistics have even managed to change a few people's minds about what the Chiefs need most. Our individual arguments have separated us into some collective camps concerning the future of our favorite team:

The trade multiple picks for Robert Griffin because he's worth it camp.

The draft a offensive guard way to damn high Decastro camp.

The spend all the Hunt's money on a four time surgical question mark Manning camp.

The just give up on the Chiefs and sign some multiple team cast-off neckbearded loser to a long term contract camp.

Or...... one of the many other subsets of Chiefs fans that have formed up to support each other in the comments sections of two weeks worth of posts. One thing we know for sure is that every last one of us thinks we're right and that those that disagree are medically blind to some degree, or maybe just plain stupid. The other thing we know for sure is the truth of this statement: Arguing on the Internet is like competing in the Special Olympics. Even if you win, you're still Anne Retart. (no offense intended to anyone that competes in the Special Olympics)

In that vein of thought I have decided to make this weeks post an open thread of sort. I'll explain after the jump.

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First and foremost, there will be less discussion of football in this article than you'd likely find on the walls of your average Wal-Mart handicapped toilet men's room stall. I just wanted to put that out there right away in case you're too busy to read anything that isn't football related. This is a rant post, but one with a very specific set of rants that all relate to Valentine's Day. I'll also try to pass on a little bit of hard earned Valentine's wisdom that I have gathered throughout the years. Ladies of Arrowheadpride, I need to apologize in advance to you specifically. You see, I'm a guy. That means most of my Valentine's experiences are viewed from a guys perspective, and thus you may confuse them with sexism if you aren't reading carefully. I don't mean to insult you. Mostly, I just hate Valentine's day.

Before I get a full head of steam going that prevents me from interjecting a little composure into my attitude let me be very clear. Like every man in every relationship with a woman, I'm whipped. If you are, or know a man in a relationship that says he isn't whipped.... he's talking to his buddies, and his better half is out of earshot. Every last one of us just wants to get through the day without being subjected to a disappointed, whining, angry, ticked-off, screaming, or silent treatment giving wife/girlfriend. (correction: some of us actually prefer the "silent treatment", but only if we can still have sex too). Collectively, as men, we'll put up with just about anything this unjust world throws at us to make her happy today. However, that doesn't mean we're going to suffer in silence. Bitching about all the bull-poop we have to go through today to make her happy is to be expected. Silence, my dear girlfriend/wife, costs extra.

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While reading and commenting in other threads today the question of how defense relates to championships again reared its ugly head. We've all heard it, and most of us have said it or believed it at one time or another. Defense wins championships. The question: Is it true?

Being a huge fan of defensive football myself, I'm going to have to work hard to remain objective on the topic. Any of you that have been around Arrowheadpride.com for a few years can bare witness to my defensive homer-ism. I love sacks, pressures, huge hits, stuffed runs, quarterbacks picking turf out of their face masks, and all manor of defensive domination. In my not so humble opinion, there is no better game of football than a 9-6 or 10-7 contest between two defenses that rack up ten sacks, thirty pressures, five interceptions, eight batted down passes, sixteen runs for a loss, and countless numbers of bruises and sprains resulting from smash mouth style hits. Keep your 45-38 offensive juggernaut games off my television. I'm likely to turn the channel to some other game out of boredom.

I don't want to get to complex or include too much number crunching as to get away from the basic question so I've opted to stick to just rankings. However, I'll be using the simple rating system from Pro-Football-Reference.com as my starting point. All numbers that I use will come from their base ratings, in which 0.0 is the average and teams are ranked in relation to that average. (Above for better, below for worse). Please click that link if you'd like a breakdown of how the numbers are generated.

Without further ado: the jump.

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*excerpts paraphrased from Wikipedia

In their 1962 season, the (Chiefs) Dallas Texans strolled to an 11–3 record and a berth in the team's first American Football League championship game against the Houston Oilers. The game was broadcast nationally and the Texans defeated the Oilers 20–17 in double overtime. The game lasted 77 minutes and 54 seconds, which still stands as the longest championship game in professional football history.

In the 1971 season the Chiefs tied with the Miami Dolphins for the best record in the AFC, and both teams met in a Christmas day playoff game which the Chiefs lost 27–24 in double overtime. The Dolphins outlasted the Chiefs with a 37-yard field goal. The game surpassed the 1962 AFL Championship Game as the longest ever at 82 minutes and 40 seconds. The game was also the final football game at Kansas City's Municipal Stadium.

So there it is folks. The Kansas City Chiefs hold the record for not only the longest game in NFL history, but also the longest championship game in professional football history. Historic records for sure, but not all records concerning length are as favorable.

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In a shortened off season without much to talk about one of the most discussed topics in football was the in placement of the kickoff spot. Vehement posts and countless comments piled high like stolen dorm room furniture on a college bonfire. There were arguments made for both sides of an issue that had almost no discernible effect on the entertainment level of the actual games. The NFL didn't collapse, people didn't stop watching the games because they had become boring, and the longer fields that teams had to traverse didn't devastate teams' ability to score.

The NFL was able to accomplish exactly what they set out to do (reduce the lopsided percentage of injuries on kick off plays) without ruining the game day experience. There were still plenty of exciting kick return plays. In fact, kick return specialists seemed to take more risks in attempting to run out kicks that really should have been knelt upon. All in all the NFL rules committee, as it seems, made the right decision on a rules change.

But not every rule in the NFL is a good one, and this off season the committee should get back in the board room (or bored room, if that's how you choose to imagine a rules committee meeting) and start reviewing some questionable regulations. There are plenty of NFL rules that serve only to make things way more complex than they need be. Simplification is the key to successful implementation and uniform enforcement if any game rule. The more complex or the more situation specific a rule becomes, the harder it will be for the players, coaches, and fans to get behind.

There's not much to simplify in a changing the kick off yard line. There aren't any special situation or stipulations that must be put in place for any specific types of kick offs. And it doesn't take 10 minutes of rewind and slow motion aided reviews to find out if the ball was spotted on the correct yard line. Simple, understood by all, and easy to enforce; That should be a goal for every rule change.

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Happy 'Nothing Worth Writing About Day' everyone. Sit back while I beguile you with a complete article about nothing, and yet something. I'm sure many of you will argue that I've penned many articles that were about nothing in the past. The difference is that this week it is my intention and goal to fill space in the blog-o-sphere with multiple paragraphs of nothing.

The Chiefs football season is over, but the playoffs and the Super Bowl have yet to be played. This means that although the Chiefs may be finished, the NFL season isn't. We cannot correctly describe the current time period as the off season. That should be clearly evident by the complete lack of off season news about Chiefs players, draft trades, or even a demotivating news story about the drunk driving arrest of a member of the red and gold.

That's right, there's nothing to talk about. Lucky for me, it's a whole lot of nothing......

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Good evening Chiefs fans. Sorry about the late post, but I was on another thread here at AP commenting and lost track of the time. In addition, let me apologize for last week. (What the heck am I talking about?) It seems that the holiday season got me all turned about and I forgot what day it was. Instead of posting on Tuesday, I posted on Monday. I didn't even realize I had done it until Wednesday evening. What can you expect from an idiot? Chris, Joel, and the Arrowhead Pride readers are getting a level of competency equal to the salary I earn for this gig.

Now that we all know just how sorry I am let's get into this weeks topic so I'll have something to be ashamed of for the remainder of the week. Without further ado : Cheese Wheels and Stereophonic Headphones

*** Just Kidding. Only 1 of you is going to find that even slightly amusing, but that's okay because I wrote it just for you.

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2011 is in the books, along with another season of Chiefs football. Having failed to make the playoffs, the Chiefs are forced to nurse their wounds and try to get healthy for next year. A couple of guys are getting an all expense paid vacation to Hawaii for their efforts this season, and that's the highlight of the Chiefs season.

On the positive side: Defense, defense, defense. The longer the season went, the more the Chiefs defense improved. Even without the very good, and equally over-hyped (potential aside, what has he really accomplished so far in his career?) Eric Berry on the field the Chiefs managed to field what I would consider an elite level secondary. If anyone on the Chiefs staff has earned some props it has to be Emmitt Thomas. Thomas is a Hall of Fame thirteen year veteran Chiefs player returned home to coach the secondary; and he's done a fantastic job. With second, third, and at times fourth string safeties playing in games the Chiefs still managed to put a talented squad on the field that had the ability to cover anyone they faced. Thomas earns my Chiefs coach of the year award hands down. (Mr. Thomas please feel free to drive down to Texas for your honorary pack of gum and autographed picture of Cliff Claven from Cheers)

Romeo Crennel should get the nod for his scheme and play calling for sure. His use of press-man principals outside, with zone in the middle and the occasional 4-3 alignment were great calls that allowed the team to hide their flaws in the back-field while still covering for long enough that the front seven could get some pressure. Crennel has more than earned his contract as the defensive coordinator. He put together outstanding game plans over and over again all season long that perfectly anticipated the offenses tendencies. The team didn't always execute, but the game plans were solid. I'll be disappointed to see him taken out of the role of coordinator, even if he takes over as the head coach. Crennel's system kept the Chiefs in games that the Chiefs offense had no business still being in.

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I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas, or a Happy Hanukkah, or a a Swell Quanta, or whatever other mystical dogma filled belief system day off work that you subscribe to most. I enjoyed having dinner with some family and passing out presents to the kids while drinking bourbon with a like minded in-law. It was a day of relaxation and smiles that was almost perfect.

Too bad that in the back of my mind an ulcer inducing pest was chewing away at my brain while a sinking feeling in my gut gnawed at the lining of my stomach. The Chiefs blew it on Saturday. There's no way to sugar coat the outcome of that game. They got down on their knees and pulled the pooch over in front of them squarely, facing away from them, and proceeded to move their hips in a repeated forward and backward motion.

Don't mistake my disgust for misplaced hope. I'm fully aware that the Chiefs chances to make the playoffs hinged on the outcome of four different games. Denver had to lose to Buffalo (which no one in their right mind thought was going to happen). And then Norv Turner's team would have to lose to Megatron's group and propel the Lions into the playoffs. Even if both those things happened, the Chiefs would still have needed to beat the Broncos in a head to head match up in the final week of the season with the division championship as the prize.

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It's been a late night at work for me, so today's piece is a short one. As many of you already know, I'm a defensive fan boy. Nothing would make me happier than for the next head coach of the Chiefs to be a defensive minded guy. Romeo has done a fantastic job of taking over the re-build that Pendergast started. The Chiefs defense has shown nothing but growth and improvement since Romeo took the helm. Inconsistency is still a problem for the defense, and the team as a whole, but every Chiefs fan (even the blind ones) can see the continued improvement the defense has made under the tutelage of Mr. Crennel.

But.... It's not time to take the plunge yet.

There's a lot of buzz going around since the Packers game about Kyle Orton. Chiefs fans here on Arrowhead Pride as well as on talk radio, and dozens of other forums seem ready to dive into Orton's hot tub sans pants for the long haul. He had a great game vs. the Packers, throwing for 299 yards and zero interceptions. The Chiefs pulled off the biggest upset of the season while Orton tossed the ball around to ten different receivers. It was a great showing for Kyle, and a strong argument in favor of keeping him on the team in 2012.

But....It's not time to take the plunge yet.

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Happy Tuesday boys and girls. It's been a tumultuous early week for the Chiefs. After yet another blowout Sunday, in which Tyler Palko proved beyond doubt that he isn't even close to being half the quarterback that Matt Cassel has been, Scott Pioli and Clark Hunt handed Todd Haley his well faded, torn-up, and sweat stained hat, along with his walking papers and a fresh set of Mach 3 blades for the job hunt preparations.

***QUICK, Everyone jump to the conclusion that I'm somehow defending Cassel as the quarterback of the future with the first half of that extended sentence.

The Chiefs are now without a long term head coach as well as being short in the offensive coordinator position. Romeo Crennel will step into the role of interim head coach and continue to call the defense for the remaining three games of the season. As of Monday, the Chiefs playoffs hopes are now bound as directly to Denver's actions as their own. If the Chiefs lose another game, they're out. If Denver wins another game, the Chiefs are out. We have reached the end of playoff rope. It's a brittle rope with frayed ends that have twisted themselves apart, leaving the Chiefs hanging by naught but a thread.

***Sorry Mr. Muir, but you can read the writing on the wall can't you? You might be lucky enough to remain the line coach in 2012; but after the performance of the truly 'offensive' line in the last few weeks, even that isn't a sure bet.

It's officially time to start the discussion about off season moves for coaching positions, draft picks, and free agents. I can't think of a better summary of both our season, and the off season to come, than was sung by Emerson, Lake & Palmer. You young-in's might need to fire up your You Tube fingers if the melodious notes of carnival barker style lyrics don't immediately jump into your head.

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Playoffs? Playoffs? Don't talk about playoffs!

Too bad, I'm going to talk about playoffs. If you're a football fan (and not JUST a Chiefs fan) then you're probably doing what I'm doing as we move into December. You're looking ahead to the playoff picture and wondering who's going to make the tournament. So let me clear this up for you the best that I can with 4 games to play.

AFC Out: Dolphins, Browns, Colts, Jaguars (no one is earning a wild card spot at 8-8)

AFC Hanging on by a thread: Bills (5-7) with the division leading team at (9-3), Chiefs and Chargers (5-7) with division leader(s) at (7-5), Bengals (7-5) with two division leaders holding a (9-3) mark.

The Bills, Chiefs, and Chargers have almost no prayer of getting to the playoffs without winning their respective divisions, and the Bills would have to win the remaining four games, while the Patriots lose the next four games AND have no one else in the division win two of the remaining four for that to happen. The Chargers and the Chiefs are slightly better off, but just slightly. They are each behind by four games, but Denver has the better conference record and the better division record, so a tie won't help. Both these teams need to have a one game lead in the division, or an equal record without losing any more division OR conference games.... while Denver and Oakland not only lose the rest of their division games, but also at least one conference game outside the division.The Bengals are racing for a wildcard spot barring a miracle where both the Steelers and Ravens lose three of the next four and the Bengals win three of four.

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Many of you won't agree with me on this statement, but for the first time this year the Chiefs face a bona fied QB controversy. If you listened to the ESPN game announcers, you would be led to believe that Tyler Palko is a rocket scientist. His understanding of the Chiefs offense, and the game of football in general, is so complete that he's a shoe in to become an NFL coach. (Take this next sentence with a grain of salt, as the guy's only had one start in the NFL) However, all that knowledge amounted to diddly-squat when it came time to translating it to the field. The Chiefs offense was abysmal versus a battered New England Patriots secondary that should have been susceptible to down-field passing game. The Chiefs defense started out very strong, and had a good game plan headed into the game, but the inability to finish even one offensive drive during the course of the game was disheartening to say the least.

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October is long gone. The month of the win streak has passed, and the scraggly, gray-spattered, pubic-bush looking beard will be shaved away. (Not a moment too soon IMO. Haley has spent the last month looking like a train car hopping hobo. I bet he went out Halloween night carrying a broom pole on his shoulder with a red kerchief tied to the far end of it.) November (the month of the great Turkey slaughter) began with a THUD for the comeback Chiefs. The picture above represents not only the new month, but also the new game day uniforms of the Chiefs offensive (and believe me, their play was definitely offensive) linemen. Hint for the slower thinkers among you: In what country will you find Istanbul?

Let me back up a step; I'm not here to whine about the loss or to blame one group of players above others. Every member of the Chiefs squad (players and coaches) worked hand in hand to stink up the field against the Dolphins. That game was a perfect storm of ineptitude, failed execution, unpreparedness, and inability to adjust. The soaring eagle that was the October Chiefs flew south for the winter, to be replaced by a a flock of lame ducks. The Dolphins gutted, de-feathered, and slow cooked our team and then hung them in the front window of the local Chinese restaurant to be served up as Peking Duck to the starving anchors of every  NFL game-day recap show on the air. Worst of all, it happened right there at Arrowhead Stadium. Chiefs fans could smell the BBQing duck in the parking lot, where only hours before they had been tailgating. All trace of the wondrous odors of burnt ends and sausage links gave way to the stink of scorched feathers and rendered fat. The previously win-less Dolphins feasted on 5-star gourmet meal of a 4 game win streak.

Does that mean I'm officially off the bandwagon? (I can hear the suck-for-Luck crowd and the scavenger bird-like negative Nancy's licking their lips at the prospect of stumbling upon another rotted corpse) Of course not. My Chiefs passion never would have survived the Vermeil and Edwards years of complete defensive failure if it were so weak as to be shaken by a handful of bad games. All it means is that I have to focus my keen eagle eyed vision on the big picture, rather than the latest debacle.

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What is the Halloween version of Charles Dicken's immortal Ebeneezer Scrooge line "Bah, Humbug"? That's a question I'll have think about, and a very important question indeed. I'm going to need to find a suitable substitution for the oft uttered anti-Christmas discounting phrase. And I need to find it fast.

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In case you missed the first one, you can find it here. Unrelated Rants

Whenever another holiday bye week comes around my thoughts turn bitter and the 180 year old man in me bubbles to the surface. (Oh, who am I kidding? I'm like this all the time. The bye week has nothing to do with it). While attempting to choke back the bile of contempt rising in my throat, I came to the conclusion that the best way to rid myself of all the deep seated hatred boiling in my bloodstream would be to go off on a mindless rant to anyone with enough time on their hands to read it. Congratulations!!! You have chosen of your own free will to be that someone (There's no use fighting it now, you've already clicked the link. It takes more effort to click 'back' than to continue reading).

One rant won’t possibly be therapeutic enough to return me to my usual rational, easy going, non judgmental self (stop laughing DThomas and hmills, just go with it) so I intend to expel as much of the evil in my sole (no that is not misspelled. I store the evil in my feet) as I can with two completely unrelated rants. They may even be somewhat related to football in some small and insignificant way. I feel that with a losing record still in place we've talked about purposely sucking for Luck ad nauseam, and it’s time for something different. Later, in the comments I’d like you (yes, specifically YOU. It’s not a general invite. I’m talking to YOU that is reading this sentence at this exact moment) to take this chance to spew out some of your own disgust about whatever drives you crazy, or call me out as the idiot I profess to be. However, as I’m mere seconds away from slap shooting a kitten off a rooftop with a hockey stick, I get to go first.

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Note: This piece was written on Friday, Oct. 7th, before last weekend's game vs. the Colts.

Pats West is the moniker that was incorrectly slapped onto the Chiefs team when Scott Pioli took the job as the new GM in Kansas City. There was a lot of talk about how Pioli would be bringing the New England team building philosophy to the red and gold, and the first major trade of the Pioli era seemed to support that title. Matt Cassel and Mike Vrabel were added to the K.C. team as new leaders on their respective sides of the ball. They brought with them a work ethic and football acumen taught by the very team Pioli helped to build in New England. Since the day Haley was named the coach of the Chiefs, no title has seemed less appropriate than Pats West.

I submit to you (those that grace my article by spending a small portion of your valuable time to read) that the Chiefs look a lot like the Patriots. It's more of a mirror image than a direct comparison, but there's a lot to learn by looking at a mirror image, and the Chiefs should take notice of at least one thing that the Patriots did last season, and will soon be doing again. 

Before I type anything else I feel that I should point out one thing: I am a defense lover. I only know as much about offense as I had to learn in order to play defense. I've tried to open my eyes to a lot more of what happens on the over hyped side of the field, but I am by no means a student of offensive football. The NFL game has been changing with the addition or tweaking of rule after rule that pigeon hole the defenses and set the passing game up for success. I don't really like the direction the game is headed in, but as an obsessed fanatic I'm also hell bent on understanding it on a nuts and bolts level.

It's this nuts and bolts thought process that has lead me to what I hope will be an interesting thought completely centered around the 2 minute drill.

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The Kansas City Chiefs have begun the 2011 season. It took 10 absolutely horrid quarters of the 2011 season to wake up the Chiefs and their offensive play caller, but in the second half of the 3rd game someone finally talked some sense into Bill Muir. I think that he was under the impression that, being an ex-offensive line coach, he wasn't allowed to call passing plays on any anything less than 3rd and 20. In fact, in the first half of the week 3 game he was still calling running plays, even on 3rd and 20.

In all fairness to Muir, the few times he took the stick out of his back side and called a passing play the results were mixed (and that's being kind). They were mixed between INT's, scrambles resulting in sacks, incomplete passes, incorrect routes run by receivers, flat out drops, completions good for 2 yards less than the team needed for a first down, and running back screen plays. Those kind of results don't exactly inspire confidence in the teams ability to mount a passing attack. Matt Cassel has to shoulder most of the blame for the ineptness of the passing game so far this year, but as we saw in the second half of the San Diego game, this team CAN complete the occasional pass play if the OC bothers to call them when it's not 3rd and 15+.

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Watching the national media, the local K.C. press, and most especially, the Internet savvy fan base not only swallow the seemingly never ending onslaught of assumptions, but actually begin parroting it as fact has completely ruined my week. What happened to journalism? What happened to fact checking and making sure you get the story RIGHT, instead of just reporting it first? 

Just 3 games ago the Chiefs were developing a media buzz. The talking heads on the radio and various sports channels couldn't say enough good things about the Chiefs, their coach, their GM, and even the lowly Matt Cassel. When the Chiefs finished the regular season with a playoff birth there was SERIOUS talk of Todd Haley earning the coach of the year award. Jamal Charles was argued by some as better than Chris Johnson. Dwayne Bowe had apparently put his history of the dropsy's behind him; and Derrick Johnson had finally lived up to his first round potential after a hard nosed coach made the decision to bench both Johnson and Bowe, and thereby motivate them to play their very best football. Matt Cassel went 27 and 7 and earned a back up pro bowl spot by fan and player votes. And Tamba Hali suddenly went from a mid-tier pass rusher to the best in the AFC. 

Haley's off season program's goal of making sure the players were in shape, first and foremost, before even letting them on the field to learn the system was pointed to as being a huge part of the teams turn around. That same off season program was touted to when fans and writers alike tried to pinpoint a reason for the relative health of the Chiefs squad as compared to other NFL teams. In short, Todd Haley and Romeo Crennel were 'the man' in the eyes of the fans and the media for their ability to coach players that had previously never lived up to their potential.

Scott Pioli and Todd Haley's approval polls have been through the roof for the last year, and very few had many complaints. There was no talk of firing Haley, or dumping Pioli, or trying to lose as many games as possible so that the team could have the number 1 overall draft pick. In fact, Pioli was praised by most, not only for drafting Eric Berry, but for doing it when the media's overall opinion was that Pioli would never take a safety in the first round. 

And now, three games later?

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Yea, that's pretty much how we all feel about it Matt.

Happy Tuesday night everyone. Week 1 is in the books after a double header on Monday night. My body is currently punishing me for staying up to watch every second tick off the clock when I knew the alarm would ring a 5:00 a.m.

Let me start off today with a personal note. Feel free to skip the next paragraph if you didn't notice that Ramblings of an Idiot has been absent for the last two weeks.

I've tried to keep the Thorman's in the loop concerning my work schedule the last couple weeks, but I haven't really attempted to keep the AP community informed. Let me apologize for the lack of a Tuesday column the past two weeks. In an attempt to avoiding talking too much about me and too little about football, let me just make a three sentence excuse. In the course of 14 consecutive working days I put in a little over 217 hours on site and about 15 more on paperwork and payroll at the office. My work places are a 40-55 minute drive from my bed, one way, so tack on another 24 hours of drive time. My dogs and my girlfriend haven't forgiven me yet. That's all I have to say about that.

So........ (long pause for dramatic effect)...... How 'bout that Chiefs game? And that's all I have to say about that.

Okay, maybe I can say one or two more things. First and foremost, please stop panicking. It's only one game, and there are 15 more to go. If the team passes the point of no return (loses enough games to be statistically eliminated from the playoffs before the 2/3 mark of the season) then I'll be right there by your side sticking pins in a Matt Cassel voodoo doll and reporting live on the scene with all the latest K.C. real estate market hubbub. Until then, please stop panicking. A lot can happen in 15 weeks; starting with a win over the Lions in Week 2 to bring the Chiefs to .500. 

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I don't align myself with any political party. I patently refuse to claim that any one religion has an upper hand over any other in terms of which one is correct. I do not take sides in the boxers or briefs debate. And I won't put my foot down and take a stand when comparing real boobs to fake ones. [After all, if she paid for them, they're hers]. However, long time AP readers all know by now the #1 thing that I will choose a side about. Defense is 10,000 times more interesting, more entertaining, and more exciting to watch than offense ever will be. Defense IS football. Offense may sell tickets to the layman fans and it may be the only thing that fantasy football goobs tune in to watch, but defensive football is what brings me back every Sunday. Hard nosed, big hitting, run stuffing, quarterback punishing, snot bubble forming, mud in the face mask, blood on the jersey DEFENSE is THE reason I love football. 

***Note: A fantasy football goob is someone that never followed the NFL, and would never be reading an internet football blog if they hadn't discovered fantasy football a couple seasons ago. AND it's someone that has a fair weather fans attitude about individual teams because they only care about which players will earn them the most points in their league this year. Don't get your panties in a bunch and start sending me emails about how you're a REAL FAN even though you play fantasy football. I play fantasy football too. I just happen to live in a reality where I can understand that football players and coaches play to win games, not max out my fantasy points.

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