OH THANK GOD FINALLY. The conference finals are upon us. Tonight's game has the San Antonio Spurs hosting the Seattle Super Sonics Oklahoma City Thunder. The Spurs swept the first two rounds (like the Magic a few years ago, and look how well that turned out for us!) and the Thunder are riding high from eliminating the Los Angeles Lakers.

I think most of us will agree that whoever wins the Western Conference Finals will hopefully destroy whoever makes it out of the East, though.

Who do you all got for the Spurs/Thunder match-up? Spurs are well-rested, streaking, very experienced, have home-court advantage, but also very old. The Thunder are young, fit, talented, and kind of annoying.

I need more words, so...here's a riddle:

You can have me but cannot hold me;
Gain me and quickly lose me.
If treated with care I can be great,
And if betrayed I will break.
What am I?

So, seeing as it's a Saturday, surely there are those of us who are enjoying the night. Alone. Inside. And what better way to celebrate our awesomeness than talking to faceless strangers on the internet! :D?

Anyway, I can't come up with 250 more words so I'mma steal Redfield's post. Thanks, love!

Little known fact: there are actually teams still playing basketball at this point. I know-I was shocked to discover it as well. It turns out that the season continued even after the Magic were eliminated. I'm fairly sure that this is the first time this has happened, but I think we should all write a letter to David Stern to find out just what kind of crap he is trying to pull, as well as put a stop to this sort of thing.

Anyway, the two teams playing are the Sixers and the Celtics. Go neither team!

Well, there isn't a game thread posted yet, so here's one until Evan and/or Mike make one (I hope).

Tonight the Orlando Magic (23-13) face the Milwaukee Bucks (14-22) for the millionth 4th (and final) time, thank God. The Magic have won all of the previous meetings between the two teams, though they have hardly been routs.

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MIAMI HEAT VS THE DALLAS MAVERICKS.

DESPITE MOST PEOPLE'S MISGIVINGS, THIS HAS ACTUALLY BEEN QUITE AN ENJOYABLE SERIES, IF YOU IGNORE THE WHOLE HEAT BEING THERE ASPECT.

But wait, why are you shouting, Squid?

BECAUSE MORE THAN THREE PEOPLE NEED TO PARTICIPATE IN THESE THREADS, OKAY? SHOUTING WILL HELP GET THEIR ATTENTION!

You need help.

YEAH, I KNOW.

MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT MAVS VS HEAT

THERE, OVER 150 WORDS. SEE YOU SOON! GAME 4 AIRS TONIGHT AT 9pm FROM DALLAS ON ABC.

YES I'M STILL DOING THIS.

So. In a not-at-all shocking development, the Dallas Mavericks have advanced towards the Finals for the first time since 2006. Bless. And in a not-at-all startling piece of information, the Miami Heat ALSO look to be on their way to the NBA Finals, ALSO for the first time since 2006! My, my, what are the chances?

Well, I'm sure it was all a big coinkidink.

Now, I'm guessing everyone here (everyone being me and my many personalities) will be rooting for the Mavs, but the ECFs are yet to be determined! (LOL yes they have.) Tonight, the Chicago Bulls take on the Miami Refs Heat as they struggle to keep their post-season alive. Down 3 games to 1, Chicago better WURK IT if they have any hope of winning the next three games in a row, a feat that--as the NBA loves to remind us--is a very difficult one to overcome.

SO TONIGHT, LAAAAAAAAAADIES AND MEEEEEEE, LET'S GIVE IT UP FOR THE CHICAGO BULLS VS. THE MIAMIIII CHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAT!!!!!!! WOO WOO WOO WOO WOO WOO WOO!!!!!!!

Feel free to join in. ( ._.)

So  there you have it, folks. The Miami Heat are the new NBA Champs!! WOOO!

Oh. Wait...They didn't win. But...why...? When they beat the Celtics the other night, they certainly acted like they'd won the finals.....

How odd.

Well, whatever, I'm sure it doesn't mean anything. Moving on, tonight the Oklahoma City Thunder take on the Memphis Grizzlies in a game I hope is more interesting than the Bulls finally eliminating the hapless Hawks and the Lakers being hilariously swept by the Mavericks. I also hope that other people will continue to indulge me in this and take time out of their busy schedules of not giving a $#@% to hang out, watch the game, laugh, drink, and chat.

...I lost my train of thought. ANYWAY, I now need to come up with twenty more words. Um. Here, have a riddle:

I am the beginning of sorrow, and the end of sickness. You cannot express happiness without me, yet I am in the midst of crosses. I am always in risk, yet never in danger. You may find me in the sun, but I am never out of darkness.

LOL Lakers

LOL Hawks

LOL Celtics

LOL John Smith's shot chart

GAMES TONIGHT:

The Oklahoma City Thunder visit the Memphis Grizzlies, 5pm (ESPN)

The Miami cHeat visit the Boston Celtics, 8pm (ABC? NBC? CBS? idk one of those)

The excitement overfloweth.

Now, I'm sure we're all amused by the Lakers and Celtics right now, what with them currently being swept away by the tides of hilariousness, but remember, we mustn't be petty in our celebrations of their downfalls. That would be rude.

LOL nah I'm kidding, screw 'em.

So I'm hoping more people join in on this celebration of American basketball today! As much as I love talking to myself (and I DO), you can't deny that these series have been awful just awful GREAT! The Hawks have really proven themselves, amirite?

Also, how...hmm, how interesting would it be if the Mavs met up again in the Finals with the cHeat? Poor Mavs.

In case anyone is still interested in following the Playoffs, I thought I'd start a thread for those of us who aren't ready for it all to end.

Tonight's games:

Atlanta Hawks @ Chicago Bulls at 8pm (TNT)

Dallas Mavericks @ LA Lakers at 10:30pm (TNT)

The Hawks take the Magic's rightful spot in the semifinals versus the Bulls. While the Heat dominated the Celtics the other night in their first match-up, hopefully this series will be a little more interesting and closer. And maybe both teams will emerge as losers. :D? Okay, okay, enough bitterness.

So who will you all be rooting for? Why? How many more words can I use up until I get to 150 words? How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Is Derrick Rose the next coming of Jesus Michael Jordan? Will Dwight finally marry me? Will JJ stop being useless? Important questions...

I think we can all agree that this is long overdue.

Evan Dunlap, founder and maintainer of OPP (or 3QC as many of us old-timers remember it as), has had a major impact in the world of Magic basketball. This site wouldn't be the same without him, even if it can be a bit of a thankless job at times. Whether it's dealing with trade rumors and Bass/Anderson fights, creepy trolls of the Polega kind, or wanky members of the board >.> he's always done so patiently and respectfully, and I think we as members definitely owe him a big thank you for being such a great and intelligent mod.

So thank you, Evan! I still think of you as Ben in my head /o\

Also, bring back caption contests.

Relate your favorite Evan moments here! Wax poetic about his hair! Or just thank him with a smile :D

Okay, so Mickael Pietrus is no longer a member of the Orlando Magic, but I think we'll all remember him fondly for his three-point shooting and stepping out of bounds for no particular reason.

Well, Peaches had the honor of being the 32nd best animated .gif of 2010! Congratulations, mon petit chou! We knew you could do it!

Watch and laugh and die a little inside. :)

(Remember, these are .gifs, so keep that in mind if you have a slow connection or a thousand-year-old computer!)

On Veteran's Day in the good ole US of A, Miami will be hosting Boston where the two teams meet yet again on national television (TNT) to celebrate their awesomeness and be awesome with one another and hang out with their awesome friends and then sit around and soak up each other's awesomeness. It'll be great.

Come hang out, have a good time, don't be stupid, etc.

There will be punch and pie.

A place for us to continue to congregate, converse and/or commiserate all things Spurs/Mavericks . . .

I just got several text messages from my mother regarding a segment on the 10 o'clock news she saw tonight stating that businesses along Edgewater Dr, in College Park, were forced to remove signs supporting the Orlando Magic in order to make the area look like a more inviting place to live and shop. I haven't been able to find any links (yet) supporting this, but if it's true, I'm appalled. My mind, it is boggled.

Keep on the look-out for any news about this and let's see if we can't do something about this.

Shaquille O'Neal is ready for title No. 5

Sam Alipour at ESPN interviews the Big Crab about his new team and his "competitors" (that he doesn't see as competitors). Some notable quotes I pulled:

Something else LeBron got an odd amount of heat for: What are your thoughts on his decision to skip out on the post-elimination handshake with the Magic?

That was stupid, too. I walk off the court without shaking hands all the time. All the time. Ain't no rule saying you gotta shake nobody's hands. If I don't like you, I'm not touching you. I don't give a s--- what nobody says. I don't want to jinx us, but if we do everything right, we won't be faced with that decision [shaking hands after being eliminated]. But hey, if we are, don't expect me to shake your hand.

Class act. MOAR:

They're calling you LeBron's bodyguard. They're saying you were brought there to counter Dwight Howard.

We're not even worried about Dwight Howard.

Not even a little bit?

Look, his team did a great job of surrounding him with four shooters. If you have one big man with four shooters, like I always had with the Lakers and Heat, it's over. Those shooters, [Mickael] Pietrus, [Hedo] Turkoglu, they hit some big shots.

It's not that Orlando was better. It's just that Cleveland was one piece away. And they have that piece now. So, they're calling me LeBron's bodyguard? That's cool. Call me the Big Witness Protection.

And my favorite delusion quote of the night! (Morning, whatever...):

There are some concerns that you'll slow the Cavs down.

I can play slow or fast.

You really think you can play fast?

Of course I can play fast. I've always played fast. But I didn't start winning championships until we slowed down. Wanna talk about the history of the game? In the last 10 years, show me a fast team that's won. I've been on four champions. None of them were fast.

LOL. Oh Shaq. You suck.

I had the urge to show off my Magic gear this morning and share with all you fine folks. And then I thought--wouldn't it be fun to see what different shirts, hats, souvenirs, mementos, etc. we've collected over the years that show our true love of the Orlando Magic?

So I'm asking you all to share pics! I'll show you mine if you'll show me yours!

An old playoff shirt from the 1995 Finals!

No one can stop us! ...except for the Rockets. :(

My Magic jacket, windbreaker style.

The back of the windbreaker. Can we say early '90s?

My plants love supporting the Magic too!

Wave that flag, loud and proud! Yes, it is being held up by pink string.

And last but not least, my beautiful, coveted MAGIC JACKET.

Most likely bought at the FANattic that used to be on Colonial, this one's pretty unique. I haven't seen it on another person yet.

Look at that awesome logo!

Oh yeah. Kick ass.

Come on, Magic fans! Show me what you got!

In an update to Paul Finger's fanpost, if you are indeed interested in coming over to my house and experiencing Game 2 with a bunch of other crazy Magic fans, between today and Wednesday at noon send me an email at thegiantsquid83@gmail.com.

Once I have everyone's email, I'll send out my address and directions, if needed. Please indicate in your email if you're allergic to anything, especially food or cats--we have two--or if you're a vegetarian/vegan. I'm planning on ordering pizza for the group, if that sounds like a good idea to everyone. Also, if you have any further ideas, please don't hesitate to email me! Anyone and everyone is welcome! It'll be a lot of fun, I promise. :D

So remember, please email me by noon on Wednesday! I need time to organize the food and hide the bodies. I hope a lot of you guys come!

Over at Sports Illustrated, everyone's favorite swimwear magazine,their NBA roundtable of writers had this to say about our very own huggable coach:

3. Stan Van Gundy has criticized everyone from the officials, to Shaq, to the Celtics for their concern over injuries, to the Knicks for not hiring Patrick Ewing. Is the Magic coach speaking the truth or are these just sour grapes?

Ian Thomsen: Who is the strong voice on that team? They don't have one. In some way he is letting everyone know that the Magic are going to demand respect, that they plan to go far this year and they don't mind making enemies along the way. They have a reputation around the league (based in no small part on being clobbered by the Pistons in recent years) for being a meek, finesse, three-point-shooting team, even though they're among the league leaders defensively. So I think Van Gundy is trying to set an aggressive example for his players heading into the playoffs by lashing out a little bit. It's not a major strategic move on his part, but it's a small step in transforming his team into a contender.

Jack McCallum: Coaches are quoted almost every day from the beginning of October until the end of the season, so it's unwise to toss all of those comments into one bag and proclaim it either "garbage" or "gold." Van Gundy went after the Celtics because he feels his team isn't getting its proper respect. That puts him in the company of -- let's see -- every other coach who ever lived, including Vince Lombardi. SVG went after the officials because that's what coaches do. He went after Shaq to protect his own player, Dwight Howard, and he went after the Knicks to protect his own assistant, Ewing. Yes, the comments about the Knicks' disrespecting Ewing were unfair. But you can't say the man isn't keeping things interesting in Orlando, where -- let's face it -- things just aren't that interesting. Now he'll come after me.

Chris Mannix: Reporters hate "coach-speak," which we loosely define as a laughable quote given just to prevent any bruised feelings. So why are we hating on Van Gundy for telling the truth? Sure, Van Gundy could be more careful with his words (Shaq was right -- he's not a flopper, though he did flop on that one play), but I like the coach's honesty. Is more attention given to the Celtics' injury woes than the Magic's? Yes. Do the Knicks patronize Ewing? I don't know about that, but as someone who has known Ewing for a few years, I respect his opinion.

Steve Aschburner: No problem with Van Gundy and whatever he's saying (can't claim to have absorbed it all). Still, his tone and timing were off in blaming the Knicks for honoring Ewing as a great alumnus even though they never interviewed him for coaching vacancies, and he easily could have let the "Shaq flopped" thing pass. Maybe he does feel a little overlooked, under-respected and defensive for his team. But Shaq brutalized him by hanging that "panic" label on Van Gundy, and he still seems like the wounded party from the Miami exit in 2005. Besides, in our business, if the players and the coaches aren't talking, then guys like us get stuck trying to make something out of nothing.

I have nothing interesting to add. I just thought it was amusing. :D

from the Orlando Sentinel:

Magic F Rashard Lewis recently broke out of a shooting slump, but he has had greater issues weighing on his mind.

Lewis' year-old daughter, Gianna, has been in and out of an Orlando hospital the past few weeks with an ailment physicians have been unable to solve.

Lewis said his she has had high fevers, muscular pain and rashes.

"It's just been weird," Lewis said. "Something's not right. She's had a fever for like 20 days."

Lewis missed a practice last week to be with her in the hospital. He said he contemplated flying home from New York early Monday but decided to stay.

If he can't find any answers in Orlando, Lewis said, he and his family might take Gianna to a hospital in Houston, Lewis' hometown.

I think we can all agree here that our thoughts are with the Lewis family and we all hope for a full recovery for their baby girl.

I'm officially sold on the Magic.

I have been seduced by Dwight Howard's utter dominance on offense (where he has been overpowering for years) and on defense (where he has taken his game to another level this season). I have been staggered by Jameer Nelson's meteoric rise to stardom. I have been wowed by Rashard Lewis' and Hedo Turkoglu's prolific play, particularly from the behind the three-point line. And I have been impressed by the fact that Orlando ranks third in the league in field-goal-percentage defense.

For those reasons and more, Orlando is my new No. 1.

The SI NBA Power Rankings aren't based on records alone. The writer, now Chris Mannix, usually takes into account what the team did that week, how well they performed, etc. I've followed these rankings for the past few years, and this is the first time the Magic have been #1! It might not seem like much, but dammit if it isn't an awesome feeling! :D

An article by Brian Schmitz on his basketblog states that the Magic's coach, Stan Van Gundy, will "forever regret" misleading the Sacramento Kings during the summer of 2007 when he was shopping around for coaching jobs.

A stinging column note appeared in Tuesday's Sacramento Bee by Bill Bradley, under the headline "Sacramento Was A Used Car For Van Gundy's Trip." 

Wrote Bradley, "While Van Gundy was 'visiting,' the Magic resolved its differences with estranged new coach Billy Donovan, worked out compensation for Van Gundy with the Heat (his estranged team) and made Van Gundy an offer he couldn't refuse.

"Van Gundy has since offered contrition, but the incident still leaves a sour taste. In almost 25 years in this business, I've seen some bad coaching matches. I have seen few worse examples of coach ethics as this one.

"The problem is, Van Gundy not only used the Kings, he used the Kings' fans as well."

I'm a little surprised at how angry fans and columnists are. Of course, this is coming from a fan who still dislikes McGrady, Hill, and Shaq, so I suppose I can see where they're coming from...

Paul Forrester at Sports Illustrated online gives some props to Jameer Nelson's hard work this season, and how, in the end, taking the time to develop wins the battle.

Said Jameer:

"Over the last year, I was trying to make myself into a guy who sets the team up and does things the right way as a point guard, but from an individual standpoint, that wasn't working. So I went back to being aggressive and taking shots through our offense. I never try to force anything, but at the same time, I'm trying to put pressure on the defense at all times."

My first fanpost!

As of today, ESPN, NBA.com, and the elusive Sports Illustrated rank the Orlando Magic at Number 4 in the league, just behind--you guessed it--the Celtics (1), the Lakers (2), and the Cavs (3). A choice snippet from Marty Burns at SI, who likes to rank the Magic in the lowest possible spot he can (they were ranked at 9 last week):

OK, now we can start taking them seriously. Even without Dwight Howard (sore knee), they won at Utah on Saturday to make it three of four (they also had a win at Portland) on their West Coast road trip with one contest left at Golden State (Monday). They are 9-3 on the road for the season, following an impressive 27-14 road mark a year ago.

Thanks, Marty. I know how hard that was for you.

Thoughts?