SB Nation User Blog: WhiteSpeedReceiver

Congratulations

WhiteSpeedReceiver — Sun, 22 Nov 2009 00:19:33 -0000

There are really two ways a person can look at today's game. The first is that the defenses played nearly flawlessly and that Iowa has better football players (and/or is better coached) on offense than Minnesota, and that was the difference. Being the delusional homer that I am, I choose to believe this. The other view would be that Iowa did their best Milton Berle impression and whipped out just enough to win. Either way, if you like defense it was a great game. I think the defenses did more than enough to frustrate the offenses and win the game.

Congratulations again,

WSR

Phil Steele's Mid-Season All Conference

WhiteSpeedReceiver — Fri, 16 Oct 2009 19:03:23 -0000

Human College Football Cyborg Phil Steele has released his mid-season All-Conference and All-American teams. There are a few familiar names on the list.

First Team All-Big Ten

Eric Decker, WR

Nate Triplett, LB

Second Team All-Big Ten

Troy Stoudermire, KR

Lee Campbell, LB

Third Team All-Big Ten

Matt Carufel, OG

Eric Small, DT

Simoni Lawrence, LB

Marcus Sherels, CB

Is there more? You bet your Gopher-loving ass there's more:

FIRST TEAM ALL-AMERICAN

Eric Decker, WR

It's Just Wrong

WhiteSpeedReceiver — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 18:46:56 -0000

I have never felt this way before. It's almost nauseating. Deep down, I almost want to cry. But in the end it really is for the best.

Before last weekend, I'd never openly rooted for Iowa to win a game. But that was before Rich Rodriguez arrived in the Big Ten. Last year really didn't matter because Michigan was just short of brutal. Even with the loss to Michigan State and the impending curb stomping they've got coming from Ohio State, I just didn't feel comfortable with Michigan being even average with that thing in charge. So I cheered for you guys, and I convinced the people I was at the bar with pregame in Minneapolis to do the same. I just didn't want to say anything on here because I might jinx it with my tremendous luck. "It's just a one-time thing, for the good of the conference," I kept telling myself.

Unfortunately, fate just won't let me do that. I got to work this morning and looked at the Big Ten composite schedule, and right there in front of me was yet another reason to root for Iowa. Don't get me wrong, I dislike you people. There are more Pantherhawks out there that I've met than the people who post on here (no offense intended). But once again, for the good of the conference, I find myself rooting for Iowa. Because when it comes down to it, Kirk Ferentz is a better person and coach than that mouthbreathing douchenozzle that's in charge in Madison. And every game he or that thing in Ann Arbor wins means there's a greater chance that they may be around polluting our conference longer with their presence.

So (hopefully for the last time) good luck again this weekend, Hawkeyes.

Week 1 Power Poll

WhiteSpeedReceiver — Tue, 08 Sep 2009 17:38:34 -0000

Every week, I'll be providing a special type of power poll: For those people who are about to be unemployed. No assistant coaches here (You can start breathing again, Georgia OC Mike Bobo), just the guys who wear the big headsets. For those of you who may say this is macabre, you're right. I run the dead pool for my office, too (will you hurry up already, Patrick Swayze?).

5. Bill Lynch (Indiana) He did lead the Hoosiers to a win over D1-AA (Get bent, NCAA) Eastern Kentucky, but they tried their best to lose the game. This may be the only win they get this year.

4. Ron Zook (Illinois) Yes, he led the Illini to a Rose Bowl. That was 9 losses (in 13 games) ago. And the thumping he took at the hands of Mizzou in a "reloading year" is not a good sign. The fact that his team quit is a worse sign.

3. Paul Wulff (Washington State) They just got worked by Stanford. He's 1-11, and Washington's looking good with their new coach (Steve Sarkesian). I'm hesitant to put a coach in his 2nd year this high, and it may get corrected over the course of the season, but he belongs in the Top 5.

2. Dan Hawkins (Colorado)

via cmsimg.coloradoan.com

1. Al Groh (Virginia) He's fired, he just doesn't know it yet. Or maybe he does after losing at home to William & Mary 26-14. Fortunately for every football masochist in the world, that matchup with Bill Lynch is still on the horizon for him.

What We Learned

WhiteSpeedReceiver — Mon, 07 Sep 2009 14:37:03 -0000

After reviewing the game multiple times, careful consultation of my magic 8 ball, and playing with the Flanker Mutt (who was wearing her Gopher collar), I have come up with a comprehensive review of what happened on Saturday and what we've learned about the team. I have watched it from multiple angles and multiple definitions, including HD from my couch, HD from my recliner, and SD from my bed. I've used all my years of playing, coaching and watching to prepare this summary.

So without further adu, here it is: We still don't know a damn thing.

Congratulations Hawkeyes!

WhiteSpeedReceiver — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 21:01:35 -0000

It took a lot of hard work and dedication to the cause, but Iowa finished in the Top 5. A special tip of the cap is owed to Kirk Ferentz and the coaching staff who were able to find the young men that enabled Iowa to perform to the high level that they did this offseason. Some people will try to diminish your success by saying that it was a weak season, and it was. But in the end Iowa was one of the best programs in the country this year. Congratulations again!

http://www.everydayshouldbesaturday.com/2009/09/03/fulmer-cup-2009-the-final-tally/comment-page-1/#comment-355890

2009 Big Ten Non-Conference Schedule

WhiteSpeedReceiver — Fri, 24 Jul 2009 13:27:33 -0000

As we slowly lurch toward the kickoff of the 2009 football season, it's time to take a first look at the Big Ten schedules, starting with this preview of the non-conference slate. While there are a couple inter-BCS conference matchups that should appeal to most football fans, the sum of the games can be described in one word: Yuck.

Illinois: (Missouri (in St. Louis), Illinois St., Fresno St. @ Cincinnati) The series with Mizzou has been a good one the last few years, but the Tigers are replacing pretty much everyone on offense. Illinois should go 4-0, but never assume anything when <NAME REDACTED> is roaming the sidelines as the head coach. Now that he got an extension today, it seems even more likely that they'll piss down their leg against Illinois St.

Indiana: (Eastern Kentucky, Western Michigan, @Akron, @ Virginia) Eastern Kentucky was 7-1 in their conference last year, but lose their QB. If Indiana loses that game, they may go doughnut. Al Groh vs. Bill Lynch may be a matchup of two of the worst coaches in college football. 1-3.

Iowa: (Northern Iowa, @ Iowa St, Arizona, Arkansas St.) When you pay $3 million a year for a coach and have that schedule, you better go 4-0. Arizona is the most interesting game, but they're replacing a ton of starters. Iowa St. may be better without Chizik, but it'll take time to flush the system.

Michigan: (Western Michigan, Notre Dame, Eastern Michigan, Delaware St.) Michigan's trying to pad their record and win the Michigan state title. Delaware St. is actually forfeiting a conference game to take a shot at the Wolverines, but I doubt they'll be as HOT! HOT! HOT! as Appalachian St. They'll be 3-1 and halfway to a bowl game with the whooping they'll take from Notre Dame.

Michigan St: (Montana St., Central Michigan, @ Notre Dame, Western Michigan) Playing at Notre Dame is the only one that could pose a problem. That should be another game to watch, if only to see if either Michigan St. or Notre Dame is for real. 4-0.

Minnesota: (@Syracuse, Air Force, Cal, South Dakota St.) This is the toughest one to break down objectively (obviously). The game against Cal is another of the intruiging Big Ten/Pac 10 match-ups, but no sane Gopher fan should walk into the stadium expecting a win. Air Force just screams trap game. The other two are soft, delicious cupcakes. 3-1* (astrict thrown in due to blatant homerism. Your prediction may vary)

Northwestern: (Miami (OH), Towson, @ Syracuse, Eastern Michigan) The only reason this isn't the worst Non-Conference schedule in the conference is because they actually go on the road to Syracuse. They'll go 4-0 pretty easily.

Ohio St.: (Navy, USC, @ Toledo, New Mexico St.) The USC game is one of the inter-conference match-ups everyone should be looking forward to. It's the best Non-Conference game of the year for the Big Ten. Navy could be sneaky because they're one of the few teams that run the option, but OSU's superior talent should take care of them. 3-1 seems reasonable.neaky because they're one of the few teams that run the option, but OSU's superior talent should take care of them. 3-1 seems reasonable.

Penn St.: (Akron, Syracuse, Temple, Eastern Illinois) Yawn. Without a doubt the worst Non-Conference schedule in the Big Ten. If they're not 4-0, something's horribly wrong.

Purdue: (Toledo, @ Oregon, Northern Illinois, Notre Dame) A respectable schedule for a team with a new coach. Unfortunately, they're going to take their lumps at Oregon and against Notre Dame. 2-2 should be a good start for them.

Wisconsin: (Northern Illinois, Fresno St., Wofford, @ Hawaii) If they didn't have this schedule, they wouldn't go to a bowl this year. They have no room to stumble, and shouldn't. The Hawaii game is more of a vacation for the boosters and players than an actual game. A Wisconsin fan I talk to says he's nervous about the Fresno St. game, but they're not the same giant-killers they were a few years under Pat Hill.

Best Game: USC at Ohio State. Like I said before, it's going to be one of the best games of the year. Even if OSU gets pummeled, it'll be better to watch than Penn St.-Temple. Runners-up include Cal-Minnesota, Missouri-Illinois, and Michigan St.-Notre Dame

Worst Game: Indiana at Akron. This game should not be televised, because of the irreparable harm it may do to the game of football, children everywhere who may accidentally tune into it on ESPN 17, and America as a whole. Not only that, but it would probably have Pam Ward calling it. There were no runners up becuase this game is so putrid it makes me sick to type about it.

So there you have my unprofessional opinion. Now digest it, comment and tell me where I'm wrong, play a few more games of NCAA 10, and patiently wait for the last 41 days to wash away before football comes back to let us bask in it's glow.

Great Moments in Gopher Recruiting History

WhiteSpeedReceiver — Mon, 22 Jun 2009 20:15:41 -0000

Russ Archambault (2.7 PPG, 1.0 APG, 0.7 RPG, 0.1 BPG, 0.3 SPG, 1 program crippling admission), while hosting All-Everything high school star Khalid El-Amin of Minneapolis North, decides to get into a fight with the high school phenom over his potentially lost playing time.

El-Amin went on to win a National Championship with the University of Connecticut, scoring 13.8 PPG and chipping in 3.9 APG in 1998-1999.

Archambault did not win a National Championship.

Tubby Leaving to Lead Cardinals?

WhiteSpeedReceiver — Wed, 01 Apr 2009 13:58:27 -0000

Thinking they were out of the woods after Virginia hired Tony Bennett, Gopher fans will be very disappointed to learn that Head Coach Tubby Smith is considering an offer to become the head coach of the College of Cardinals. This would obviously be a surprising move, because the once-powerful Cardinals have been declining in popularity for about 50 years. Eugênio de Araújo Sales, senior member of the Cardinals, said today that Tubby's aggressive style and fiery gameday demeanor would bring something that's been lacking for a very long time to the pious group: the ability to keep younger people interested and older people awake.

This is by no means a done deal, however. If Tubby has reservations about the 82 year-old Williams Arean being too old, one would imagine that the coach would be frightened by moving to the 383 year old St. Peter's Basilica for his home games.

Big Ten Previews: Wisconsin Baseball

WhiteSpeedReceiver — Tue, 24 Mar 2009 19:38:51 -0000

The UW Baseball Field, the most beautiful place in Madison.

It looks like it's going to be another tough spring for Wisconsin baseball. Having not won a game since 1991, it looks like the streak will continue through this year as well. When asked about his team's chances this year, Coach Steve Land screamed at me to get off his lawn and something about there not being a team any more. It seems to this intrepid reporter that he was simply re-focusing his anger toward me because his team has finshed last in the Big Ten for 17 straight years, soon to be 18.

Coming soon, my review of Milton College's spring football practice.