SB Nation User Blog: Woody Wins

Warning: Not a baseball diary (entirely)

Woody Wins — Thu, 21 Feb 2008 19:01:24 -0000

The NY Times says John McCain had a lobbyist mistress before and during his 2000 presidential campaign. The story is supported by some pretty convincing evidence.

McCain denies it. Says it's not true. His relationship with that woman was not romantic. She was a friend. It was vitamin B12 and Lidocaine.

If congress doesn't take some action on this one, I'll be completely convinced that this country is run backwards, upside-down, inside-out, and by a pack of no-talent ass-clowns.

B.P.'s Giants' Spring Training Preview

Woody Wins — Wed, 13 Feb 2008 21:33:53 -0000

A little bit of bashing from some people who know stuff about baseball:

Winter grade: F
They took a 71-91 team and replaced its best position player with a guy coming off a career year who's had two above-average seasons in his life. For $60 million. Good luck with that.
NRI to watch: They signed Scott Williamson the other day. Williamson hasn't been able to keep his arm attached to his body for more than about 20 pitches, but when healthy, he's generally missed bats and been tough on righties. It's a fairly weak group of NRIs. Then again, it's a fairly weak crop of RIs, too.
Job battle to track: Fred Lewis versus a whole bunch of guys he's better than for playing time on the outfield corners. Lewis is more or less what Randy Winn was back when Winn was good, yet has struggled to impress the Giants, who seem to always find a Rajai Davis or a Dan Ortmeier or Nate Schierholtz to block him. Maybe this is the year.
One move to make: Release half the roster. And the general manager. Brian Sabean is just the wrong guy for the kind of things the Giants need to do right now. They need to start completely from scratch, lose badly for a few years, and come out on the other side in 2011 or so. Sabean is better at running a contender, something he did for years during the Bonds Era.

We're about to find out if all those people were coming to Pac Bell Park because it was so pretty there, or if it was the Giants as a team, or if maybe it was the left fielder. The Giants haven't started a year without Bonds since 1992. They went 72-90 that season, which seems a pretty good guess as to their record in 2008. Matt Cain and Tim Lincecum, two of the most exciting pitchers in baseball, are all that separates this team from much uglier embarrassment.

Thanks for rubbing our faces in it BP jerks. Interesting to note that they like Fred Lewis so much. I like him too.

My history of drug use

Woody Wins — Thu, 13 Dec 2007 16:44:56 -0000

Back in 1995 my boss suggested I start taking these tablets called emailabol. He said the drug was actually illegal but taking them would help me write reports faster, work longer hours, and be more productive in staff meetings. My boss promised that, if I wanted to keep my emailabol use a secret, he would make sure nobody found out. We both knew that public knowledge of my use could leave a black mark on my career. My boss also informed me that with emailabol increasing my productivity, I would be more valuable and a raise would certainly be in my future. He was right. I received a 3000% raise from a new company that wanted to hire me for my outstanding services.

Soon after my transfer, I noticed that emailabol was becoming really common in the industry. Some entry-level employees were using emailabol-TPS, which is similar to the original emailabol without some of the nasty side-effects (craving yogurt parfaits during snack-time, sending evites for wine and cheese parties, etc.). Life seemed so wonderful. I was achieving fame and fortune, and all because of emailabol.

After a while, things around the office started to get a little strange. It all started when my boss decided to stop telling me where I could buy emailabol. It was almost like he didn't want to have knowledge of my use. He started to do little things to separate himself from me and the other emailabol-users. I put a Post-it on his desk, just to say "hey, WTF?" but he told me he never got it. A few months later, an industry-wide memo goes out that says any use of emailabol is strictly prohibited. If that wasn't enough, we were going to be tested for emailabol and the results would be made public! This new information hit us hard. Many of us had relied on emailabol. It was so much a part of our careers that working without it would be near impossible. Alas, we did what we had to do. Most of us quit the stuff.

A few guys around the office still talk about using -- but never too loudly because apparently we disgraced our friends, our family, and the industry by using emailabol.

Matt Garza For Delmon Young Blockbuster Close

Woody Wins — Wed, 28 Nov 2007 21:07:13 -0000

This is a joke right?

I know we can put together a package better than that.

Say Lowry, Velez, and Hennessey???

I don't know, just thought I'd see if anyone has any more info about this rumor or if anyone else feels like the Twins are pillaging the Rays.