SB Nation User Blog: abelard

MLB Power Pros

abelard — Mon, 07 Apr 2008 05:37:09 -0000

I wouldn't normally post this, but I found it hilarious, and I don't know what to do, so....

I was playing my M's season and I decided to attempt a Ho/Reitsma/Mateo for Bannister/Greinke/$$$ trade. Because you have to wait 3-5 days for the trade to be accepted or rejected, I chose to sim ahead. In the meantime, I got a trade proposal from the Yankees. They wanted to trade Ching-Ming Wang for .... Willie Bloomquist. Apparently Virtual Bill Bavasi can also force other GMs into bad trades by eating ten chicken strips at once.. I immediately accepted the trade, but I then felt guilty. It's such an obviously lopsided trade that I'm not sure I should go through with it. I leave it up to you: should I send the pride of Bremerton to New York, or should I do Cashman a favor and reject the trade?

Poll

Should I make this trade?

Yes, it's not your fault the trade AI went haywire

50 votes

No, this is more lopsided than Phelps for Buhner

7 votes

57 votes | Poll has closed

Doyle ----> AAA

abelard — Sat, 29 Mar 2008 01:59:54 -0000

It's been reported that Chris Snelling's cleared waivers and is reporting to the Phillies AAA squad.

Poll

WIthin three years, Doyle will be a....

Productive regular

19 votes

Decent bench player

26 votes

AAAA superstar

39 votes

Medical School Cadaver

70 votes

154 votes | Poll has closed

Haren ----> Arizona

abelard — Fri, 14 Dec 2007 23:15:10 -0000

for Carlos Gonzalez, Brett Anderson, Greg Smith, and three other warm bodies.

I won't pretend to know anything about the Diamondbacks prospects, but I will say that I'm happy that Haren's out of the division.

Off Topic Diary of the Day

abelard — Sun, 08 Apr 2007 22:22:30 -0000

I hate shootouts.
Nothing good has ever come from a shootout.
Gary Bettman was probably conceived during a 50man shootout on his mother.
That is all.

300 character fact:
[puts on radiation shielding suit]
[starts cursing]
[cursing fogs up eyeplate]
[curses some more]
[more cursing, some of it in French]
[and sure, why not, even more cursing]

Tommy Lasorda is a saucy little monkey boy

abelard — Wed, 28 Feb 2007 02:36:53 -0000

Tommy's being featured in a tell-all book based on a Hollywood prostitute. Exerpts have been released and they're not safe for anybody.

Highlights:

Sasha/Gibson: "It's $1,000 per hour. So that would cost you $1,500. You can visit her at her place. She lives in the Hollywood area."

Lasorda: "That sounds fine, Sash. I'm looking to get together this week. I'm thinking Thursday late afternoon. I've got to get home to the wife for dinner."

"He was super easy and a really nice guy. You were right on all counts, Sasha. First he requested I pop in my girl, girl porn movie. ... He just loved watching all that! I noticed though that he wasn't the aggressive type."

Much more explicit stuff is avaliable here. I don't know if I should laugh, or should pay for years of therepy to delete these images from my nightmares.

Suddenly, Lasorda's "It's your duty, Judy" ads have new, sicker meanings.

Bucky Jacobsen is a long way from the majors

abelard — Sun, 21 Jan 2007 20:49:45 -0000

Geoff Baker looks at how Bucky went from being the next Edgar to tearing down aluminium signs in a downpour while hoping for a deal to play in Korea.

300 character Bucky fact:

"Bucky used to be notable as one of the few comic book deaths that stuck. A frequent aphorism among comic book fans, known as the Bucky Clause, was that "No one in comics stays dead except Bucky, Jason Todd, and Uncle Ben." Ironically, all three have recently been brought back to life in their respective universes, though Uncle Ben lasted for only a short time."

What's next?

abelard — Thu, 14 Dec 2006 05:26:33 -0000

In the past week, Rafael Soriano and Chris Snelling have been traded, and Yuniesky Betancourt has gotten into hot water with immigration. With that in mind, I give you this poll:

300 character fact: Tycho Brahe was said to own one percent of the entire wealth of Denmark at one point in the 1580s and he often held large social gatherings in his castle. He kept a dwarf named Jepp or Jeppe (who Tycho believed was clairvoyant) as a court jester who sat under the table during dinner. Tycho also had a tame elk [that died when it drank] a lot of beer and fell down the stairs.

Poll

What calamity will happen next?

Jose Lopez vanishes off face of earth (or is traded to Baltimore)

9 votes

Adrian Beltre injured in bar room brawl with Carl Everett

5 votes

Kenji Johjima gets radiation overdose

0 votes

JJ Putz suffers intrascrotal hematoma after drunken fan attacks him

12 votes

Ichiro overdoes on nerve tonic

1 votes

Yuniesky Betancourt arrested for every unsolved NY murder, sentenced to 6 life sentences

2 votes

Richie Sexson kicked off team for excessive sideburns

1 votes

Felix Hernandez hypnotized into thinking he's a chicken, still overrelies on fastball

10 votes

Raul Ibanez suffers smoke inhilation from saving cat from burning house

9 votes

49 votes | Poll has closed

Geoff Baker on the King's home life

abelard — Sun, 26 Nov 2006 18:00:07 -0000

Here.

I hate Geoff Baker for the "White Jays" hatchet job he did while he was in Toronto, but this is really interesting. It starts with "The noon sun belts out high heat as a bleary-eyed Felix Hernandez drags himself from his bedroom", and only gets better.

300 character minimum quote: "But nothing is formally a being unless it has quiddity; nor is it knowable" (John Duns Scotus, Metaphysics VII, q.7, #22)