bigfatdrunk
Apr 01, 2008 Jun 01, 2012 465 15354
Economics nerd. Policy wonk in training. Stock market genius wannabe. Beer snob. Poser. And balding.
Surfing a tsunami of swagger.
website: Battle Red Blog
email:
a fan of
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Memorial Weekend Brisket Showdown: Fat Cap Up vs. Fat Cap Down
by bigfatdrunk on May 28, 2012 8:02 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
First of all, re-iterating what Tim mentioned today, thank you to all those who have and continue to serve. Both my wife and I come from families with a vast military heritage (though hers were all officers and mine not so much), and the bfd family greatly appreciates all you do.
Saturday Night's Alright For Commenting: BRB Food Open Thread (05/19/12)
by bigfatdrunk on May 19, 2012 6:54 PM EDT
in General BRB Idiocy
on Battle Red Blog
A couple weeks ago, DreKeem was nice enough to grace us with his presence with a music open thread. I thought I'd do something a little different, as well, with tonight's open thread. Now, don't let me stop you from celebrating Chelsea's win today (EnglishTexan, that's for you, brother) or the merits of turtle stacking. Yes, this is fully an open thread. But I thought tonight would be fun to talk about food, as well. Before you stuff yourself to the point where movement is no longer an option, jump with me, won't you?
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Worst. Open Thread. Ever.
by bigfatdrunk on May 5, 2012 12:01 AM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Earlier today, Tim wrote the BRB admins a short note:
Dear Wonderful BRB Team,
Tonight is my special night out with my pet chihuahua, Ricky, so I hope one of you can cover for my absence with a hard-hitting article or wonderful foresight or anything, really. Tonight is about me and Ricky, and you can't take that away from me.
Bear hugs,
Tim
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John McClain: "Texans have released WR Jacoby Jones."
So long, Jacoby, and thanks for all the drops, muffs, and poor routes.
Meandering Sunday Thoughts On The Texans' 2012 Draft
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 29, 2012 4:29 PM EDT
in 2012 NFL Draft
on Battle Red Blog
Words that best describe my past four days: football, beer, Grim Burger, Blue Moon Screwdriver, crawfish, and football. Oh, and flipping off Charley Casserly every time he was on TV. I mean, seriously, the guy who destroyed two franchises from the inside gets paid to talk about football? Really? OK, I'm done ranting, and there's real fluffy posting material after the jump.
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With The 26th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, your Houston Texans Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 26, 2012 3:52 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Michael Brockers has a nice lead on Kendall Wright for the Broncs, so we'll call it. This leaves your Houston Texans on the clock. Vote early. Vote often. If you want somebody else listed, please let me know.
With The 25th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Denver Broncos Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 26, 2012 11:35 AM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
The Community really doesn't like Luke Kuechly as he continues to plummet down the draft. Dont'a Hightower goes to Pittsburgh, putting the Broncos on the clock. Do the Broncos take a shiny new toy for Peyton? Or do they address NT, a huge need for the team?
With The 24th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Pittsburgh Steelers Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 25, 2012 9:36 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
The Community sends Janoris Jenkins off to Detroit on a high note, leaving the Pittsburgh Steelers on the clock. This is another team that can go a million directions with their pick, but what do you think they do, oh wise voters? If I need to add other players to the poll, just let me know.
With The 23rd Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Detroit Lions Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 24, 2012 10:24 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Nope, no ballot stuffing going on at all. The Community has, out of pure malevolence, sent Stephen Hill to the Cleveland Browns. Course, y'all might actually be right, and Cleveland's FO does have a tendency to make interesting picks, but I just don't think so. Way to screw everything up, guys. (Heh. Methinks AllenOU created 180 different logins to skew the vote. I also like the word "methinks.")
Next up are the Detroit Lions, who have slowly become the Bengals of the NFC with a number of players of dubious background. I want to party with these guys. Chest stomps and blunts for everybody!
With The 22nd Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Cleveland Browns Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 24, 2012 4:08 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Glenn Cordy heads off to lovely Cincinnati, leaving the Cleveland Browns on the clock for their second 1st Round pick. With the fourth overall pick, the Community sent Trent Richardson packing to Cleveland. Will the Browns add another play-maker for the awesome ex-Longhorn Colt McCoy? Or do they replace Colt McCoy altogether? Chime in after the jump.
Austin Pre-BRBAPALOOZA Party - Bumped
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 24, 2012 9:39 AM EDT
on Battle Red Blog
Donde esta la antes party? OK, that's not quite Ozomatli, but I did my best. On Thursday, I'll be hosting a get-together for Austin and area people to watch the Round 1 of the draft. It will be at Billy's on Burnet, as I've picked a central place that's hopefully convenient for everybody in the region (plus, I ride my bike everywhere, so I'm being somewhat selflsh). Also, I know the owner, and I'm working on getting us some sorts of discounts.
The draft starts at 7pm, and I'll be there at about that time. Please chime-in in the comments below if you'll be joining the pre-party.
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With The 21st Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Cincinnati Bengals Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 23, 2012 4:40 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Welp, looks like I'm going to need a minor miracle to wrap this up before the draft. Aikido and baseball tournaments have a tendency to make weekends disappear. Poof.
The Community obviously hates Stephen Gilmore with a passion, sending him off to Methopotamia. This leaves the Cincinnati Bengals on the clock for the second time in the first round as they opted for Dre Kirkpatrick with the 17th pick. Whom do they take with the 21st?
With The 20th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Tennessee Titans Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 20, 2012 5:00 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Jonathan Martin heads off to the Windy City to protect Jay Cutler, and now we select whom heads to Methoptamia as some sort of Orwellian punishment for merely being a football player. Who does Satan's Tutor, Beelzebud, take with #20? Let us know below! (No way I'm putting in a joke option because the BE-SFs would be stuck drafting this guy.)
With The 19th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Chicago Bears Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 19, 2012 1:00 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
The Community awards Courtney Upshaw to the San Diego Chargers, leaving the Chicago Bears on the clock. Do the Bears get some help to keep Jay Cutler vertical? Supplement the trade for Brandon Marshall with a new WR? Secondary help? The Bears can go many directions with this pick, so if you think I need to list somebody different, please let me know.
With The 18th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the San Diego Chargers Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 17, 2012 3:31 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Dre Kirkpatrick had better have terrible taste in food as he's headed to Cincinnati. //shudders// Now on the clock are the San Diego Chargers. Will they draft a weapon for Gregory Marmalard Philip Rivers? Or do they address their lack of a pass rush in 2011?
With The 17th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Cincinnati Bengals Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 15, 2012 6:37 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
For some reason, I can never spell the word "Cincinnati." I have to check it every time. So there's that. Anyway, the Community sends Nick Perry (no, not him) to the J-E-S-T JEST JEST JEST, with the terribly difficult to spell Cincinnati Bungles on the clock. Eh, at least we're not going to be forced to eat the incredibly execrable Skyline chili.
With The 16th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the New York Jets Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 14, 2012 6:47 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
The Community has awarded the DREAM TEAM BEACHEZ! the services of Fletcher Cox. If only he'd been a Gamecock. Next up, the Community will be footing the pick for Rex Ryan and the Jets, which sounds about right to me. Please join me after the jump to vote. And stuff! Gracias to FreedomRide for the pick help.
With The 15th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Philadelphia Eagles Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 13, 2012 6:38 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Well, dearest BRB brethren, I'm not sure if I'll finish before the draft, but I'll make sure to get us to the Texans' pick. Apologies to all, especially Our Dear Leader, but work and fatherhood have really cut into my time recently.
Mark Barron and Dre Kirkpatrick tied in the Cokeboys' vote, and as the Reigning Champion of Awesome, I'm awarding Barron to the Cowboys. Because I can, that's why. Next up is the Dreamiest Team in History, the Philadelphia Eagles. Obviously, their first rounder should be a real Defensive Coordinator, but I don't think Frank Bush is draft eligible. Whom do the Eagles take with their pick? Choose below!
With The 14th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Dallas Cowboys Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 11, 2012 7:39 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
The Community has awarded the Arizona Cardinals one Melvin Ingram, taking away my pleasure of writing the word Gamecocks on every post. One more time: Gamecocks.
Now on the clock are the Dallas Cokeboys. Obviously, combing through player's arrest records would probably be the best route to go. However, vote realistically, please, whatever that might mean.
With The 13th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Arizona Cardinals Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 10, 2012 10:48 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Now that the Oklahoma City Seahawks have chosen Kevin Durant, errrrrrr, Michael Floyd, the Arizona Cardinals are on the clock. You, Community, like vote and stuff on whom the Cardinals will take!
With The 12th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Seattle Seahawks Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 9, 2012 10:16 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Sorry, all. Between work and pretending to be a decent husband and father (eat it, bone31crusher), I've fallen behind. I'll have to pick up the pace quite a bit.
With the 11th pick, the Community awarded David DeCastro to the Kansas City Chiefs. MDC is giddy at the mere thought. Now up are the Oklahoma Cit....oops!, I did it again!, Seattle WarChickens. UprootedTexan is excited Kevin Durant is on the board, but whom do you draft for the Seahawks?
With The 11th Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Kansas City Chiefs Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 4, 2012 8:27 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
So, I didn't list a CB for Buffalo, and they got stuck with Riley Reiff. Oh well. Just remember the Golden Rule of this here exercise: I am always right. Always. Remember this, and you will find nirvana.
Now on the clock are the Kansas City Chiefs, MDC's second favorite team behind the BE-SFs. Community, what kind of wackiness do you have up your collective sleeves? I said sleeves, FreedomRide.
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With The Tenth Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Buffalo Bills Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 3, 2012 6:36 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Dontari Poe heads off to Carolina, which was my vote, as well. Pairing Cam Newton with Michael Floyd would be an extremely interesting happenstance, as well.
Now, we have the Buffalo Bills. They signed some guys in the off season. I'm not prepared to talk about it.
With The Ninth Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Carolina Panthers Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Apr 2, 2012 3:58 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
The Community has awarded the Miami Dolphins the lovely prize of Ryan Tannehill. Next on the clock are the Carolina Panthers, whose run defense wasn't just ranked last by FootballOutsiders, but it was ranked AYKMLOLBBQ~!
With The Eighth Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Miami Dolphins Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Mar 30, 2012 3:48 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
The Community has selected Quinton Coples for the Glitter Kitties, which leaves us with the Miami Dolphins. The Fins seem to be the red-headed step-child of the off-season, with players teasing them with interest only to run away screaming. Let's just safely assume whomever they draft will holdout. Forever. After we jump, you get to vote.
Mac's Football Blog: Walter Accepts Pay Cut
I don't know who Mac is nor if he's credible, but it's being reported Kevin Walter has taken a cut in his salary from $3.5MM to $2MM. Grain, salt, etc., though at least he got the name correct. Still, this would open up $1.5MM in cap room for the team if true. via Rotoworld.com
With The Seventh Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Jacksonville Glitter Kitties Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Mar 29, 2012 4:06 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
What is it you're wearing, St. Louis? Is that a new Justin Blackmon you've got on? Absolutely smashing. Oh dear, I believe your Mr. Bradford was sacked while we were idly chatting. Pity.
Now on the clock are the Jacksonville Glitter Kitties, whom have oddly been a focus 'round these parts today. Like the Rams and Browns, the Jaguars claimed a LOL offense last year led by Blondilocks Blaine Gabbert, who was FootballOutsider's worst ranked QB. So he had that going for him. Which...really isn't very nice. Funny, however. Who do the Jaguars take with this pick?
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With The Sixth Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the St. Louis Rams Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Mar 28, 2012 3:08 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Tampa Bay nabs Morris Claiborne, putting the St. Louis Rams on the clock. By FootballOutsiders, St. Louis had the worst offensive DVOA in the league, were 22nd in defensive DVOA, and were worst overall. Injuries obviously played a huge role in their poor season, but it's still a team bereft of much discernible talent and with Steven Jackson entering his age 29 season. Via their trade with the Redskins, the Rams hope to start adding talent across the board. How will they start?
With The Fifth Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Mar 27, 2012 3:04 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Since none of you said ANYTHING about my hilarious opening on the last post, you get nothing funny here. SO TAKE THAT. HATERS! //runs away crying
Ahem. In the closest vote so far (and maybe the tightest during our exercise here?), the Community has placed Trent Richardson on the Cleveland Browns. Congratulations, Cleveland. Now on the clock are the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, another team with offensively offensive problems.
With The Fourth Overall Pick Of The 2012 BRB Interactive Mock Draft, the Cleveland Browns Select...
by bigfatdrunk on Mar 26, 2012 2:50 PM EDT
in Stuff To Get Us Through The Offseason
on Battle Red Blog
Now, here are some results from our community poll: 84% of people believe the Vikings will draft Matt Kalil. Of course, this is just a community poll which is not legally binding. Unless proposition 304 passes, and we all pray it will.
Next up are the Cleveland Browns, a team that makes the Chicago Cubs look wildly successful in comparison. I believe the Browns will be looking to upgrade their Houston Astros-esque offense, but I'm just one man...one incredibly studly, intelligent, women want me men want to be me man. After the jump, you get to have your say.
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