SB Nation User Blog: effin fisk

IMPORTANT: The fate of my beard rests in your hands

effin fisk — Tue, 18 Sep 2007 20:01:25 -0000

Hey Redbird faithful,

I've been lurking in the shadows a bit for the last month, not able to comment in game threads much from work. Moving from Missouri to L.A. has meant long drives and long work hours that don't lend themselves to watching too many live weekday games.

Still, I've followed the ups (occasional) and downs (numerous) this team has gone through over the past few weeks. Now, as the season draws to a close, I have an important decision to make: What do I do with myplayoffbeard?

It was almost exactly one year ago today that me and a buddy--having just polished off a six-pack of Bud Select--decided that blogging the progress of my playoff beard would be a good idea. But the blog exists for the sole purpose of following my team during the playoffs, which means it's only relevant for one month out of the year. Even then, it only works if the Cardinals make the playoffs, which isn't looking like it will happen this season. I've thought of an alternate use to keep it going until the Cardinals' next postseason appearance, but it makes me a little uncomfortable. I wanted to run it by you, my fanatical friends, before proceeding.

What if I auction off the use of my beard to one of the eight teams in the playoffs this year?

It would work like this:
1) I start an ebay auction, offering my beard's magical powers for use in the 2007 MLB playoffs.
a. Any eligible team except the Cubs. Naturally.

Rights for the beard go to the team of choice for the highest bidder.
The beard isn't shaved until that team

a. Exits the playoffs
b. Wins the World Series

What do you think?

The pros:
-I get money: Cost of living is steep out here on the West coast and I'm generally broke. Plus I just forked over some more cash to renew my hosting fees.

-It doesn't hurt the Cardinals: Since they likely won't be in the playoffs, I won't really be rooting against them.

-Statistical research: I figure a few of you will love this one. Increasing the sample size will help determine whether last year's beard actually helped, or if it was just along for the ride.

The cons:
-Betrayal: I care a lot about this silly team playing this silly game, and the last thing I would want to do is sell my soul for a few bucks. Or betray you, my fellow fans.

-It could backfire: I have no idea if anyone would pay hard-earned money to buy the rights to my beard. I highly doubt it, but am curious to find out.

-Betrayal (again): It's a big one, so it's worth two cons. After all, the beard is a superstitious act, so karma could come into play. Plus I wanted to have an even number of pros and cons.

Please vote on the poll. The results of the poll will determine my course of action in the coming weeks.

Man, I really miss watching games.

Thanks all,

effin

Poll

What will become of the playoff beard?

Advice for a soon-to-be transplanted Cards fan?

effin fisk — Thu, 09 Aug 2007 16:00:10 -0000

After a quarter of a decade living in southwest Missouri, I'm packing up and moving to be with my girlfriend in L.A. I've got tons of family and friends there, too, which makes for an exciting move and an easy(ish) transition.

But...

This also means saying goodbye to Cardinals country. Home games will no longer be three hours away, and I can't look for $5 in loose change to buy a lawn seat for the AA team here in Springfield anymore. I know that "Cardinal Nation" is everywhere, but it's going to feel strange listening to conversations about the Dodgers & Angels while sipping a beer at a bar.

Before I go, I wanted to ask advice from other non-Midwest fans. How do you stay connected? What's the best cost-effective TV/Radio/Internet plan for following the games? What do you do for playoff games (should someone tamper with the thermostat in Hell, allowing us to sneak into the postseason)? Any advice is appreciated.

Peace out, Missouri.

The Colby Rasmus/Ken Griffey Jr. connection

effin fisk — Tue, 03 Jul 2007 23:15:27 -0000

Hola gang,

Sorry guys, I have no statistical analysis comparing Rasmus to Griffey, nor do I have any interesting trade rumors to bring up. Instead, I just thought I'd share an interview with Springfield star Colby Rasmus that I conducted last week. The kid has a pretty funny story about a run-in with Griffey back when Jr. was in the minors.

If you're like me and stats make your head spin, you'll like this interview. The subject matter touches on his season a bit, but most of the questions delve more into his personal life than his skills on the field. I'm not stat-savvy enough to ask better questions than "What's your best pick-up line," I guess. (He didn't answer that one, sadly.)

Anywho, you can read it here. Enjoy.

Also, we're planning a few more player interviews in the coming months, so if you like this one, leave suggestions for future interview or questions. If not, I'll keep these to myself in the future. I just figured it might be a nice break from the Reyes saga.

VEB glossary of terms

effin fisk — Tue, 29 May 2007 11:24:22 -0000

Okay boys and girls, here it is: The unofficial Viva El Birdos glossary of terms. nycbirdo offered to keep track of the phrases we've made up along the way, so here's the place to post them. If you can, try to provide applicable links to the origins of the nicknames. (Hint: if you can't remember, typing "nickname + vivaelbirdos" into google seems to work.)

Some of this will surely overlap with this post about the meanings of players' names, but let's not stop there. At the very least this will be a nice distraction until the offense starts playing consistently again.

Update [2007-5-17 10:36:59 by lboros]: thanks for getting this started, e.f. i'm gonna keep the diary active for a while, and then eventually i'll make it a permanent page (under the "Why El Birdos," as suggested) with an active comments section, so that it can be updated.

Blogging from Jupiter

effin fisk — Mon, 05 Mar 2007 08:15:48 -0000

Hola my VEB peers. Tis I, the playoff beard dude. (I haven't had much motivation to keep the site up during the offseason, but I did redesign it and I'll be back at it more frequently starting in April, I imagine.)

Anyway, I work for GO Magazine, a bi-weekly entertainment magazine in Springfield. We've got press passes to the AA Cardinals games this year, and will likely be doing a lot of our reporting about the team on our magazine's site. Blogging at games, frequent updates throughout the season, etc.

One of our writers is in Jupiter this week, and he's sending us his accounts of a few of the spring training games he's going to. His first blog entry is up right now. I'm not sure if others here have been sending updates from Jupiter, but I thought this might be of interest.

Also, let me know what sorts of AA-related things you guys (and gals) would be interested in during the season. We've got a few ideas, but we're open to suggestions.

Thanks y'all. Go Cards.

effin fisk

Da Beard

effin fisk — Thu, 12 Oct 2006 22:19:42 -0000

Hey guys,
10 days into the experiment and my beard is still going strong. How about yours? Send me pics and I'll post them on my site. I'm very proud of all members of the Viva El Birdos community for your participation. Keep those beards alive! They've helped our team beat the odds so far...

Myplayoffbeard.com

Playoffs superstitions?

effin fisk — Wed, 04 Oct 2006 14:14:27 -0000

Wearing my new, red Viva El Birdos under my unbuttoned Albert Pujols jersey seems to be my new good luck charm. They won the game I attended Saturday, and again when I wore it yesterday. I'm not washing them until we lose.

I'm also attempting to grow out a playoff beard, but it's hard when your face looks like Brad Thompson's. (I'm blogging about it at myplayoffbeard.com, if anyone's interested.)

Just curious what other superstitions my fellow birdos fanatics might have. I'm convinced that good luck charms are the only things that will help us advance through the playoffs. I'm doing my part.

Best Cardinals Memory (and a reason to hope)

effin fisk — Tue, 03 Oct 2006 14:03:38 -0000

Hey guys,

To celebrate the fact that we actually made it to the playoffs this year, I thought I'd post this. I wrote it last year about half an hour after the Pujols blast off Lidge in Houston. I was quite drunk, but the moment was the greatest sports-related day of my life so far, so I sat down to record my feelings, incoherent as they were.

I thought this would be a good place to share stories about that night, or other nights when the Cardinals beat the odds. Hope you enjoy. GO CARDS!

I was elated. 2-1. Saint Louis was ahead 2-1 in the 7th inning. I was drinking beer and playing poker to celebrate the resilient spirit of the Saint Louis Cardinals. Sure, they were down three games to one in the series, but they were due. The calls, the nearly-home-runs-but-barely-foul-ball, the ejections; they'd all gone against my Cardinals in this series. Slowly but surely the plays had added up to try to take down my team. The team I listened to when I delivered pizza everyday. The team I'd race home to watch when work was over at 5 p.m. The team I'd followed online-every pitch-sitting at my computer at work. Watching, listening or following 90% of the games this season. This was the 170th game of the season, and I'd been there for at least 150 of them.

Crack.

Lance Berkman. 3-run home run to the shallowest left field in baseball. Bastard.

In an instant, my 150 games washed down the drain. My hopes, aspirations, faith in Cardinal-nation washed sadly down the drain. Soon, my playoffs beard down the drain. Houston leads 4-2. My dreams losing 4-2.

My poker chip stack went from dominant to meager. By the bottom of the 9th inning, it was gone. My fantasy football team? Losing. My Cardinals? Down 4-2.

Top of the 9th.

Strike One.
Strike Two.
You're out.

Strike One.
Strike Two.
You're Out.

Strike One.
Strike Two.
Base hit?

No. It's too late. The razor was on, and it was time to say goodbye to the playoff beard.

Bzzzzzzzzzzz.

It sounded like the sound they played in Houston when one of the "Killer Bs" came up to bat. My razor was losing charge, but I didn't care. I wanted my playoff beard gone. I wanted it off my face. The longer I tried to shave, the worse it hurt. As the batteries lost their charge, the hairs tugged and pulled even harder from my chin.

Bzzzzzzzz
Bzzzz
Bzz
Bz

Ball four. First and second. Two outs. Razor Dead. Only half my beard gone.

Number 5. No Balls. One Strike.

CRACK.

gone.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
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(Running around the house. Screaming.)

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sahsvgouiahrvona ;kjhasdiughvdfas
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(Jumping on the hood of my roommate's broken down car.)

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weiufbwieufbnwegfobuyiwegbfygwcvhjbsdnmvxzkniomd;fwhnemfhwdfmhwiuefniuwef
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wfhads;ifunsldfgiuysgfhbdkjhsvbxkhbfswfhjkbgwebuiuhfugefkybgwoegfcbwefwefgweifuytbcjeubeurtgbekwrfbw ejkfghbqiweuygfdbywegfcbjqwhgfbkjyewgfblcasflkugcnwlje

Saturday's game

effin fisk — Fri, 15 Sep 2006 19:17:40 -0000

What's up my brothers and/or sisters? I don't know what the rules are on this, but I have two extra tickets to Saturday afternoon's game against the San Fransisco Giants. I live in Springfield and I'm meeting a buddy in St. Louis for the game, but I have two more tickets that I'd hate to see go to waste.

They're $43 tickets, but they're at home (i'm at work) so I can't remember the exact section number off the top of my head. I do remember that they're handicap seats that they made available once the new seats went up for sale part of the way through the season.

If anyone is interested, let me know. You can get my email by clicking on my username. Not looking to make money, just get rid of them. I'll take the best offer, and can meet outside the stadium before the game.

Lboros, I don't know what the rules are on this site about these sorts of things, and i'm not trying to sell stuff or use the site as spam. but if i don't sell these there will be empty seats next to me, and I figured people from here would make great neighbors at the stadium anyway. If I'm unknowingly violating any rules by posting this, just delete the diary and I apologize. Love the site. Thanks!

World Series Petition

effin fisk — Tue, 22 Aug 2006 19:49:25 -0000

Hola Viva El Birdos community. My diary today features a worthless opinion with no real facts of any kind to back it up. I just wanted to publicly say, in the presence of my fellow fans, that I think the St. Louis Cardinals will win the World Series this year.

The season has been rocky to say the least. The team is flawed, sluggish and inconsistent, and yet when they're hot, they're REALLY hot. This isn't 2004 or 2005. I'm not so sure this isn't 2003 to be honest, but here we are, with a month to go, doing our best to hold onto first place and regroup for the home stretch. I think that the very thing that has been so frustrating as a fan this season is the same thing that will help us win a World Series ring this October: the team's unpredictability. Anything can happen, including a playoff run and a win against the dominant American League.

I'm 23 years old and have never seen the Cardinals win a world series. I'm not too knowledgeable about odds or statistics, but as a sign of good faith I'm writing this diary to show that I have faith in my team, through the good and the bad. If you, too, believe that this team has a chance to win the series, sign below. You're also welcome to call this crazy or stupid or whatever, but maybe a little faith will go farther than a lot of expectations. Besides, what's the worst that could happen?

I think the Cardinals will win it all this year. Who's with me?