(I figured putting this up as a Fanpost would allow me to avoid stepping on Sleek's toes? Maybe? Nah, just the fact that I barely research such points will be the best antidote.)

So last year I leaned very heavily on team schedules while "handicapping" the Western Conference playoff bubble. My thought was: all these teams are separated by such a narrow margin that merely whom they play and where they play those games would probably make the difference once the lower seeds were decided. That proved to be (fairly) accurate.

My ears perked up when I heard something on NHL on the Fly last night: the Ducks might be in Chinese Fire Drill Panic Mode right now, but they have one thing going for them: a gigantic seven game home stand starting Thursday.

Here's their schedule, copy-pasted lazily from the Ducks' page:

THU NOV 19, 2009	LIGHTNING	DUCKS	7:00 PM	PRIME(HD)	TICKETS
SAT NOV 21, 2009	SHARKS	DUCKS	7:00 PM	PRIME(HD)	TICKETS
MON NOV 23, 2009	FLAMES	DUCKS	7:00 PM	KDOC	TICKETS
WED NOV 25, 2009	HURRICANES	DUCKS	7:00 PM	PRIME(HD)	TICKETS
FRI NOV 27, 2009	BLACKHAWKS	DUCKS	1:00 PM	PRIME(HD)	TICKETS
SUN NOV 29, 2009	COYOTES	DUCKS	5:00 PM		TICKETS
DECEMBER 2009
DATE	VISITOR	HOME	TIME (PT)	TV NETWORK/RESULTS
TUE DEC 1, 2009	KINGS	DUCKS	7:30 PM	PRIME(HD)	TICKETS

Is it that ridiculous to say that this might be the moment that makes or breaks the Ducks as a playoff team?

Beyond playing seven straight games at home, none of them are back-to-back games for Anaheim. Now, some of you might be half-pissed that this trip is coming now. After all, the Ducks are playing obscenely bad hockey right now and this might be the exact time for them to crap themselves when they could collect points in big greedy handfuls.

Granted, at 4-6, the Ducks aren't exactly "protecting their house" like some jacked up dude wearing overpriced underwear but based on their horrific roadtrip (gaining 1 point in 4 games, being outscored 18-9, but you knew that already right?) it couldn't get much worse.

Three games against Pacific opponents, two games against some of the weakest teams in the Eastern Conference ... there's a lot to like about the Ducks' upcoming run.

Just some food for thought, kids.

(Oh, and since you insist on knowing about CLS, the blog's moved to bloguin. But we can still be friends, right?)

More photos » Gus Ruelas - AP

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It's been ages since I've posted at BoC but I figure that the most logical place to throw up my randomized Pacific Division feelings would be right here. Perhaps it's also only natural that after the (obvious) Top Two, things get fuzzier than a repressed homosexual camping memory. Unwanted things happen beneath the sleeping bag/jump...

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For quite some time, the hot rumor was that Saku Koivu would pull a Scott Niedermayer and follow his brother (in this case, Mikko Koivu) to Minnesota. Instead of paralleling Niedermayer, Koivu decided to follow him to Anaheim.

Surely, Sleek will have a more comprehensive look later today but here are a few of my thoughts:

1. My general salary cap rule is that it's OK to overpay a player when it's a one-year deal, but $3.25 million for a year of Koivu seems pretty reasonable to me.

2. This gives Teemu Selanne someone to hate Swedish people with.*

* I compare the Finnish-Swedish feud to watching a little dog and a cat fight. In their dog/cat worlds, it's a fierce battle but everyone else just has a good laugh.

3. The signing gives the Ducks two very nice scoring lines, which could look something like:

Ryan - Getzlaf - Perry

Lupul - Koivu - Selanne

ANYWAY, those are my spontaneous Saku thoughts. How do you feel, Ducks fans/haters?

I don't have a ton of time for this, but I thought I'd get the ball rolling since nothing is up here right now.

Apparently, Ryan Smyth has been trading to the Los Angeles Kings.

My analysis: Bwahahahaha. More from RK and CO. to follow, as the trade details have yet to be hashed out. (H/T to Fear the Fin's Twitter page, heh).

Here's what Rudy wrote about Ryan Smyth for CLS:

1. Which player, for the love of God, do you NOT want to see in your team's sweater in the 09-10 season?

Ryan Smyth. He's a potential for movement since the Avalanche are going to be about as competitive as James O'Brien at the Playboy Mansion but I despise him with every fabric of my being. I hate him. I'd rather see my own birth from the doctor's perspective than have Ryan Smyth in a Kings' jersey. Also, I don't particularly like Mike Cammalleri and wouldn't want to be the idiot team that pays him $6 million dollars to shoot from his knees.

What's long been rumored is now true. Also, Rudy talks about the Los Angeles Kings' free agency.

(Cheap, misleading headline you say? You won't think it's so funny when I'm working for TMZ some day, suckers.)

Hello everyone, just wanted to direct your attention to Rudy Kelly's post at CLS. Along with having our favorite Kings blogger contribute, there's also an adorable dog photo recycled from a hilarious post Kelly wrote about a year ago. If Rudy Kelly plus an adorable dog photo isn't enough for you to check the post then ... seriously, go to hell. GO TO HELL.

*COUGH*

Anyway, click here to check out his post. Thanks, Rudy!

In case you haven't heard, the Dallas Stars decapitated their GM hydra in favor of a guy who hopefully won't add a redundant, ill-fitting fashionisto to the fold in Joe Nieuwendyk.

It's probably important to note that I'm not a Stars fan (more of an "admirer") before we get into this, because I'm going to write some things that will make people cry into their goofy, super-literal "Stars" jerseys.

After the jump, let's take a salary cap/off-season outlook for the Dallas Stars.

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While I can't say I hate the Ducks like ... say, Wings fans or Rudy or Sharks fans, I felt a little better about this post after PD used this photo I sent him:

If you can figure out what that photo means without context, I will be impressed. Anyway, click on the photo or here to read the post. There was a Boston Bruins eulogy that kicked the crap out of mine, but hopefully you'll enjoy my subtle kick to the newspaper industry's groin and somewhat obscure reference to "Halloween" (Chris Pronger = Michael Myers).

Also, the PD commenters are already confusing me and kind of creeping me out. Good day, sirs.

Hey guys, I'm finally starting to post some of my thoughts on the BoC trip. Since I spent a ton of that time with Sleek, it made sense to me to mock myself and share some of my experiences in Irvine:

With the Ducks still in the heat of the playoffs, I figured posting these trivial thoughts on CLS would be the better move. Hope you enjoy them.

Look, I'm not going to lead you astray on this one. While - yes - I did attend Game 4 of BoC, my analysis of the game itself would be completely useless. In fact, I think my understanding of this game decreased the more I watched it. Let me share the few things I DO remember from the game.

• Spade was the lucky winner of the "sit with James sweepstakes" but he'd be a liar if he said I was a good (or bad) guy. Why? Because we were blind drunk by the second period and therefore interacted on a mostly sub-human level (which is a good thing, seriously). That being said, Spade seems like an above-solid dude with an an equally solid goatee.
• Both Ducks and Sharks fans are largely docile humans. Every time I tried to start some shit, I ran into a wall of easy going-ness. Fuckin' happy people.
• There was one dude in a Joe Thornton jersey that I heckled on our way from the Honda Center to the bar. His come back was about my belly. I wish I was sober enough to use this retort: "Hey, at least my gut shows up in the playoffs." Har har har.
• I was almost able to take a camera phone photo with some random chick that was shaking her boobs on the Jumbotron. It would be more accurate to blame the failure on my drunken phone shortcomings but instead I'll blame her not-especially-amused boyfriend for the letdown. Oh well. Guess you'll have to take my word for it.
  
• Was talking to some (much, much, MUCH) more knowledgeable Sharks fans about the future of the franchise after the game. The sentiment (reasonable enough) was that the team should trade Jumbo Joe or Patrick Marleau.

Conceptually, that makes some good sense: Marleau and Joe are the "leaders" of the team on multiple levels. Even if you rush to defend the top two picks of the 1997 draft, you only have so many huge contracts you can throw around and need to make them count. These things aren't lost on me.

But my question is: how can you possibly get anywhere near equal value for those guys?

NHL history includes very few superstar trades that work out for the team letting a big name guy loose. Usually a team unloads a superstar because they cannot afford him (Ottawa trading Marian Hossa), because the team has an unclear vision (Thornton's first trade) or because the GM is just a flat-out imbecile (Roberto Luongo traded for a neck breaker; just about every move made by Mike Milbury).

It must be difficult to live in the "THAT close" zone. Sharks fans are hurting right now, but SJ still has a reason to feel that they're on the cusp. Why not take one more shot with the core still being in prime years?

Joe Thornton - 30 years old

Patrick Marleau - 30 years old

Dan Boyle - 33 years old

Evgeni Nabokov - 34 years old

Combine those guys with some younger players who still have potential to improve (particularly Vlasic, Pavelski and Setoguchi) and you have to think it's worth another run. Trade Jon Cheechoo? That probably works, but trading one of the two stud centers would disembowel a team that still has good hockey to play.

The team made moves to get older and more experienced, which made some people think this season was a  "now or never" year. Especially since they had their greatest regular season ever. Don't forget, though, that it occasionally takes more than one year for a big move to yield a Cup (take Ray Bourque's trip to Colorado as an example).

My ultimate advice for Sharks fans: lick your wounds, enjoy your blissful existence outside of hockey and go surfing. It's all going to be OK.

(Eventually)