EPIC FAIL.

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This is obc hiding behind a plant to talk on his cell phone. It represents the general sentiment of the night, as we were all embarrassed to have even considered Mt. Adams Bar & Grill in the running.

We began our night in less than stellar fashion with obc, 'tHan, and BK showing up a solid 30 minutes late........for what reason you ask? A haircut? Of the guy who doesn't need one? Seriously? Yours truly sat on a park bench in Mt. Adams for 20 minutes. Do you have any idea how frightening that was? I nearly ended up in a pink collared shirt, slacks, and loafers. (shudder)

Once the Three Musketeers showed and rescued me from the cute girl at the bar, we sat down at a table in the back corner....perfect for such a subdued and reserved group of gentlemen.  After some hemming and hawing we ordered and the food came out pretty quickly. This is good, considering the prompt service would end up being the highlight of the night.

The burgers were at best lousy, at worst criminal. I'll be damned if I pay $7 for a burger that compares to something I'd get at Wendy's. My burger was a Wendy's single + salsa and toppings, not good. There won't be much culinary review in this recap because well, the burgers SUCKED. In the immortal words of BK, "It tasted like a hamburger martini." Not exactly a compliment. BK apologized for taking us there instead of Tinks and we accepted, but only after deeming him "Gay & Dangerous".

Judging from my compatriots' reactions to the food, I immediately asked for the check and we moved on. We ended up at Crowley's and had another hour or two of playful banter before we dispersed on our way home. All in all it was a good time, but WOW, the burgers sucked balls. I asked everyone what they thought and obc and BK (the only one with a frame of reference) had a hard time saying these burgers were better than Quatman's.

To give you an idea of how bad this was, BK was most excited at the end of the night staring through the window of an adjacent bar telling us all about "Rangers vs. Hibernians". Fucking foot fairies.

BOTTOM LINE: highlifeman21, you owe me a good burger and one beer sir. I took you at your word and you failed. The worst part was that neither the burger nor the beer was cheap. You owe me one, PLUS ONE.

PS: I call two weeks from now (November 12th is the date), and it will be a doozy. Details to follow.

More photos » by Darren Hauck - AP

"This is how many times cooler than you I am."

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We filled one thread already and hardly mentioned that the Red Sox have been sent home. I think we can all agree this is a good thing. Jimmy Fallon and Drew Barrymore can suck it.

In case you forgot it's Yankees @ Twins at 7:00, Phillies @ Rockies at 10:00. My official predictions - Twins win 5-3, Phillies win 7-4.

The picture serves no purpose, it's just because I love him.

The offense disappeared and OUR Reds lost their 82nd game of the year. It's been a nice run over the last week though, let's remember that.

Joe Nuxhall Memorial Honorary Star of the Game

Johnny Cueto - Johnny Quest pitched 7.1 innings, giving up 3 runs on six hits. It was the first time he had made it into the 8th inning since way back on May 3rd against the Pirates. An effort that's normally enough to win these days, but Wandy made us his bitch. It happens.

Key Plays

• Cueto walked the bases loaded in the 3rd and the Astros scored two runs on RBI groundouts by Lance Berkman and Carlos Lee, respectively.
• Humberto Quintero homered in the 4th to make it 3-0 Houston.
  
• The Reds went to work in the 6th, scoring two runs on a single by Johnny Gomes and a single by Ramon Hernandez.
• Cueto again walked the bases loaded in the 6th but got Quintero to GIHQ, ending the threat and keeping the Reds' hopes alive.
• Nick Massett bailed Johnny out of a jam in the 8th by getting Edwin Maysonet (who?) to ground into a sweet 1-6-3 double play. 
• The Reds mildly threatened in the 9th when Juan Fransisco walked (mark it down, it happened!) before Laynce Nix GIDP and Kevin Barker grounded out weakly to 2B to end the game.
  
• Oh yeah, something cool happened in the Bengals game, or so I hear.

via www.fangraphs.com

   The Reds are on fire right now, having won six straight games and averaging nine runs a game over that span. I have no Earthly idea how to explain the sudden offensive outburst so I'm not even going to try.

   Johnny Cueto takes the mound for the Reds this afternoon, looking to get over .500 on the season. Since being blown up by the Nationals on 8/15 he's only given up seven runs over his last 26.1 innings with 19K and 9 BB. He seems to have figured out the Astros this year after getting knocked around by them in his rookie year.

   The Astros counter with Wandy Rodriguez, who despite a 2.97 ERA is hovering around a .500 record. If memory serves me (it probably doesn't) he's been pretty hard on the Reds in his career. But he hasn't faced the current murderer's row that Dusty's been sending out there. I say he doesn't stand a chance!

   Lastly if you want to chat about the Bengals, check out the fine folks at Cincy Jungle, I hear good things about them.

  The Reds refuse to go into the abyss of another losing season without a fight. They've won five games in a row overall and eight straight against the Astros. Are you as excited as I am??? I thought so.

   Tonight we'll find out if Justin Lehr learned anything from giving up FIVE home runs in his last start, which happened to be against this very Astros team. Lehr hasn't been pitching too great lately, but he's not taking losses either. Over his last five starts his ERA is a Badroyo-esque 8.00 but somehow he's 2-2 and the Reds are 3-2 in those five starts.

Felipe Paulino on the other hand has been pitching pretty well while getting no help from his teammates. He is 0-4 this month despite a 3.52 ERA because the Astros haven't scored one single run for him. Somewhere, Aaron Harang nods his head in a knowing manner.

   The suddenly surging Reds will definitely better last years' win total. How does this make you feel as a Reds fan? Do you see real progress or is it just dumb luck? Personally I see a lot of improvement in the pitching and fielding departments, but the offense is going to need some help next year if they're going to make a run at the playoffs. I know it's all been said before, but what else are we going to talk about?

  Florida is favored by 21 points over UK but Tim Tebow may have H1N1. UC won again and I'm pretty sure they could give tOSU a run for their money on a neutral field. Louisville disbanded their football team to save money and to stop wasting everyone's time.

More photos » by Darren Hauck - AP

"This is how many bases I get every time I come up these days."

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Another quickie recap:

Joe Nuxhall Memorial Honorary Star of the Game

Joey Votto went 4-5 with two doubles, two singles, three runs scored and an RBI. In the last two nights, dude is 7-9 with 5 doubles, two RBI and six runs scored. Oh and he hit a two run HR the game before. I think it's safe to say he's back.

Other Notes

• Homer Bailey is now 4-1 with a sparkling 2.00 ERA over his last seven starts, lowering his season ERA by 1.8 runs in the process. He is what we thought he was! Or at least a lot closer to what we thought he could be.
• Brandon Phillips had two more RBI, tying his career high with 94 on the year. He also got plunked by Virgil Vasquez in the 9th and had to leave the game. My sources say he'll play through the pain in an attempt to reach 100 RBI.
  
• Drew Stubbs stole second and third base in the third inning, rattling Kevin Hart and starting a three run inning that might have been more had BP not have gotten greedy.
• Dusty Baker replaced Jared Burton in the eighth inning up seven runs and no one on base. But he invented the high five, so it's cool.
• Abraham Philip Miller had two RBI and is now hitting within 80 points of his weight. Hernadez who?
• The Reds are 21-10 when Scott Rolen starts at 3B. It's his team!
• The Reds still haven't gotten that damning 82nd loss, fighting to stave off their ninth straight losing season like their lives depend on it.
• John Wall will either win the Heisman or average less than 10 ppg. There is no in between.

via www.fangraphs.com

I got a phone call this afternoon around 1:00 that my dad was at St. Elizabeth South after being admitted Wednesday night with severe abdmoniable pain. It was diagnosed as "acute pancreatitis". I was incredibly frightened for about four hours until I was given the prognosis which seems to be optimistic. In the meantime I came up with this, love you Dad.

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More photos » by Al Behrman - AP

This is him pitching. Tonight, he was hitting.

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I had a very nice game wrap done tonight, only to be screwed by SBN. So you get this instead.

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