Bloody hell, what are we doing with a Kings-Devils Cup Finals? Absolutely nobody saw this coming, and it is well reflected in the 3rd round leaderboards for the 2012 Nucks Misconduct Playoffs Fantasy Competitions.

Head past the jump to see how you're doing. If you forgot who you picked, here are all the submissions for the players competition and for the brackets competition. To see how far you jumped in the standings, here are the 2nd round leaderboards.

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As we all know, there are probably a few hundred million fans of hockey around the world, lots of whom are dedicating endless hours of time this spring to watching the playoffs. Also, considering the demographics of hockey fans, there are going to be a lot of incredibly bored wives out there having to put up with the lack of attention from their husbands, and the lack of control of the remote.

It's because of this that CBC has decided to promote a blog called "While The Men Watch" for the rest of the playoffs. This blog, written by a couple women whose men watch a lot of sports, talks about things in sports that would interest women, such as hot athletes, ugly coaches, fashion, and a little bit of basic knowledge about the games themselves. CBC likely sees this as a way to draw in the Canadian female demographic, who would have to watch the games on CBC to know what the girls are talking about on the blog.

However, not everyone is seeing it the same way. The NHL blogosphere has erupted over this, particularily the female demographic of the NHL fanbase. This Toronto Sun article features a bunch of tweets at the bottom of the article about this, with reactions varying from "setting female sports fans back a decade" to "disgusting, disappointing and offensive" to a bunch of sarcasm about all women participating in this while cooking and cleaning. Being the resident female writer at this blog, I've been asked for an opinion.

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This has been a seriously weird post-season. Really, who could've called the Rangers vs Devils for the East, and the Kings vs Coyotes for the West? Correct answer: nobody here did. How do I know? Because just past the jump here are the leaderboards for the 2nd round of the 2012 Nucks Misconduct Playoff Fantasy Competitions.

Once again, if you forgot who you picked, here are all the submissions for the players competitions and for the brackets competition. If you want to see how far you jumped in the standings, here are the 1st round leaderboards.

Continue reading this post »

Sorry I've been bad about putting up the open threads I promised, I have been busy. Anyways, we are at the approximate halfway-mark of the 2nd round, and noticing some interesting trends. In the East, both series are quite well-matched, with all the games and wins staying very close. Meanwhile, in the West, they might be able to start the 3rd round on Tuesday.

12:00 pm PDT: Kings vs Blues, Game 4. Well well, look at this, the Kings have yet another 3-0 series lead. It appears that LA is shutting down St Louis pretty much the same way they shut down Vancouver. I guess it wasn't completely the Canucks fault for bombing the 1st round. St Louis is going to have it tough coming back from this. Viewable on TSN.

4:30 pm PDT: Devils vs Flyers, Game 4. Okay, New Jersey, you can start losing now! I need a Washington-Philadelphia matchup for the next round, don't need you screwing that up. So far, the Devils have a 2-1 series lead because they scored more goal in game 2, and because Martin Brodeur refuses to retire. Viewable on CBC.

Go catfights.

Don't you just love the weekend? You just get to sit around all day and watch hockey. (By the way, the title comes from a silly but still awesome Queen song.) Today, we have even more playoff action, with one series starting and another continuing.

• 12:00 pm PDT: Flyers vs Devils, Game 1. At one end, we have a more defensive team, backboned by Martin Brodeur. At the other end, we have a high-scoring team, with goalie Ilya Bryzgalov who can still pull off wins despite letting in lots of goals. New Jersey is going to have to find some firepower, as well as defensive power, to shut down the high-flying Philadelphia team. Viewable on CBC.
• 5:00 pm PDT: Coyotes vs Panthers, Game 2. In the first game, Phoenix kept taking 1-goal leads through the game, with Nashville constantly putting it back in a tie. Ray Whitney eventually had the OT goal to give Phoenix the first win of the series. The matchup of Mike Smith vs Pekka Rinne is going to make a great series. Viewable on TSN.

Go catfights.

Seriously, the question in the title says it all. With the game 7's ending Thursday night, I was expecting the 2nd round starts to wait for Monday, and I would have a nice quiet weekend up-island. Then, on my way up here yesterday, I hear that game 1 for the Coyotes-Predators was starting in 2 hours! Okay, so it appears that the 2nd round has already started. Here's what is on the table today:

• 12:00 pm PDT: Rangers vs Capitals, Game 1. At one end of the rink, we have Henrik Lundqvist in net, currently a nominee for this year's Vezina and Hart trophies. At the other end of the rink, we have rookie Braden Holtby, who surprised everyone by helping to dethrone the Bruins, and outshining 2011 Vezina and Conn Smythe winner Tim Thomas. Along with the potential firepower on offence for both teams, this is going to be a great series. And I haven't even mentioned that this will be the 3rd time since the lockout that they face each other! Viewable on CBC.
• 4:30 pm PDT: Blues vs Kings, Game 1. Aside from the Flyers-Devils series (Ilya Bryzgalov doesn't quite rank high enough for that this year....), pretty much every series this round is going to be a true "goaltending extraordinare" matchup. For this one, with Jaroslav Halak getting himself hurt against the Sharks, St Louis will start with Brian Elliott in net for the first couple games. At the other end, Vezina nominee Jonathan Quick will look to continue the success he had from against Vancouver. Viewable on TSN.

Go catfights.

Well, the 1st round of the playoffs, and good riddance to it. Upsets galore dominated the scene, with several powerhouses crashing to oblivion. Did anyone benefit? Yes they did, and here's the proof: the 1st round leaderboards for the 2012 Nucks Misconduct Playoff Fantasy Competitions!

Head past the jump to see how you're doing. If you forgot who you picked, and the rules and formats, check here for the players competition, and here for the brackets.

Continue reading this post »

So we come to the end of the 1st round. So far, the entire West has been decided, with Blues-Kings and Coyotes-Predators matchups slotted for the 2nd round. It's pretty disgusting to think that one of these teams will be in the Stanley Cup Finals. Anyways, out East, we still have some crazyness to sort out. The Flyers were joined by the Capitals last night for 2nd round berths, but they still have to wait on tonight's results to find out who they will play.

4:00 pm PDT: Rangers vs Senators, Game 7. This series was generally anticipated to be an easy one for New York by many. However, Craig Anderson has proved he can meet the challenge set by Henrik Lundqvist, and Ottawa managed to keep them on their toes. Viewable on CBC.

5:30 pm PDT: Panthers vs Devils, Game 7. Okay, once again I ask, how many of you called that Florida would get at least 3 wins in this series? Looking at the blog's fantasy brackets, only 14 out of 48 did. They are playing great this series, despite Martin Brodeur being the goalie in the other net. Viewable on TSN.

Go catfights.

We all know that last night was absolutely heartbreaking for us Vancouver fans, with the Canucks losing in OT to be eliminated from the playoffs. However, the post-season continues for others, as there are still 4 other 1st round matchups to be decided. I know many of you will want to take a break from hockey, and that's understandable. But for those of you who do want to watch, here's what is on today:

4:00 pm PDT: Senators vs Rangers, Game 6. Craig Anderson is proving to be a worthy match in goal for Henrik Lundqvist, and Ottawa now finds themselves in a position to eliminate the favourite New York team. Viewable on CBC.

6:00 pm PDT: Blackhawks vs Coyotes, Game 6. Phoenix managed to push Chicago to the brink of elimination, but Jonathan Toews scored in overtime in game 5 to force another game. Can Chicago do it again? Viewable on TSN.

Go catfights.

Kings vs Canucks coverage

We're off to see the Wizard, the wonderful Wizard of Oz. Canucks are up 1-0 against the Kings with one period down, good start. Let's keep it going.

Coconuts go.

We all know the drill. If the Canucks win, the series gets a 6th game. If the Kings win, Vancouver goes golfing. We're definitely not in Kansas anymore.

Coconuts go.

Well, isn't this interesting. All 4 series in the Eastern Conference are going to a minimum of 6 games each, while 2 of the 4 Western Conference matchups ended yesterday in only 5 games each. The Blues and Predators have both advanced now, eliminating the Sharks and Red Wings respectively, while the Blackhawks forced a game 6 against the Coyotes. Here are today's games:

• 9:00 am PDT: Flyers vs Penguins, Game 6. Pittsburgh has defied elimination 2 games in a row now, and can force a Game 7 with another win today. However, Philadelphia will want to finish this series on their own turf. Viewable on TSN.
• 12:00 pm PDT: Capitals vs Bruins, Game 6. Braden Holtby is playing great, and Troy Brouwer got the winner yesterday to give Washington the 3-2 series lead. Today, they host Game 6, and hope to finally finish off this very close series. Viewable on CBC.
• 5:00 pm PDT: Canucks vs Kings, Game 5. The only Western Conference matchup to not have a Game 5 yet just happens to be the one that could've easily ended last week. We all know the story here: go big, or go golf. Viewable on CBC, gamethread will go up at 4:45 today.

Go catfights.

Hey look, a series ended!!! The Red Wings became the 1st team to be eliminated from the playoffs last night, with the Predators taking the 4-1 series win. Today, we get a combination of tied series and possible elimination games.

• 12:00 pm PDT: Bruins vs Capitals, Game 5. This series returns to Boston in a tie, with games apiece. Tim Thomas and Braden Holtby have both been playing great for their teams, but someone will have to crack. Viewable on CBC.
• 3:30 pm PDT: Panthers vs Devils, Game 5. This series returns to Florida, also in a 2-2 tie. Martin Brodeur proved he's still got something in the tank with a shutout the other night, but don't underestimate the Panthers. Viewable on TSN2, once again getting the shaft for TSN's other game.
• 4:00 pm PDT: Rangers vs Senators, Game 5. To be completely honest, I predicted that NY would sweep this series. Instead, Ottawa is putting up a good fight, making this a 2-2 tie. Viewable on CBC.
• 4:30 pm PDT: Blues vs Sharks, Game 5. Ah, here comes the fun stuff. St. Louis has a 3-1 series lead right now, and one more win will get them to the 2nd round for the 1st time in 10 years (they beat Chicago in 2002, but lost to Detroit in the next round). However, San Jose is a formidable opponent, so it will not be a cakewalk. Viewable on TSN.
• 7:00 pm PDT: Coyotes vs Blackhawks, Game 5. Shanahan threw the book at Raffi Torres, with the 25-game suspension announced this morning. However, this does not appear to be hurting Phoenix yet, as they have managed to gain a 3-1 series lead without him. This could be the 1st time in "Phoenix Coyotes" franchise history (not counting their time before in Winnipeg) that they make it to the 2nd round. Chicago will have to get moving if they expect to survive. Viewable on TSN, could get shafted for a while if Blues-Sharks goes too long.

Go catfights.

Ah yes, here comes the fun part of the 1st round: where one loss is finally enough to eliminate a team. Tonight, we have 2 games on, both of which could have the loser eliminated.

4:30 pm PDT: Penguins vs Flyers, Game 5. If Pittsburgh wins, they force a Game 6 back in Philadephia. But if Pittsburgh loses, they are eliminated. Viewable on TSN.

5:00 pm PDT: Predators vs Red Wings, Game 5. Another elimination game, amazingly, but this one is more shocking because it's Detroit. A win will keep them alive, and a loss will eliminate them. Viewable on CBC.

Go catfights.

So, it turns out that both elimination games last night ended up with both the series-trailing teams finding ways to light it up. The Penguins retorted to the Flyers winning a couple 8-4 games by having their own 10-3 game and forcing a Game 5. Meanwhile, the Canucks finally got their Sedinery back, and found a way to beat the Kings. More action tonight, as more teams can start forcing elimination games for the weekend.

• 4:00 pm PDT Devils vs Panthers, Game 4. So, how many of you predicted that Florida would get at least 2 wins in this series? Stop lying, the brackets competition had the large majority of people picking New Jersey in 4 or 5 games! As Barry Melrose said yesterday, New Jersey needs to stop taking penalties, because they obviously can't kill them. Viewable on TSN2 (getting the shaft for another game).
• 4:30 pm PDT Capitals vs Bruins, Game 4. Boston grabbed another 1-goal win the other night, where Game 3 finally had more than 3 goals scored. Washington will be without Nicklas Backstrom (one-game suspension), as they try to retie the series. Viewable on CBC.
• 5:00 pm PDT Blackhawks vs Coyotes, Game 4. To be honest, I wasn't expecting this series to be so dramatic and fascinating. However, after Raffi Torres got himself indefinitely suspended for sending Marian Hossa to the hospital on a stretcher, and Phoenix scoring yet another OT goal, this series is getting CRAZAY!!!! Chicago is likely livid about Game 3, and will want to retie the series tonight as they look for vengeance. Viewable on TSN.
• 7:30 pm PDT Sharks vs Blues, Game 4. Ken Hitchcock is having Brian Elliott start Game 4, as it appears that having him in Game 3 turned out well for St. Louis. San Jose is still managing to keep up for the most part, but they need to get some wins if they expect to survive. Viewable on TSN, might get the shaft if Phoenix-Chicago takes extra time.

Go catfights.

Canucks vs Kings coverage

No matter how this game turns out, I'm laughing now. After the 1st period, the 1-0 Kings lead was making me laugh at what appeared to be a 100% chance of elimination. But then Alexander Edler and Kevin Bieksa each scored, and the Canucks turned it into their own 2-1 lead. Whaddayaknow!

Coconuts go.

Yes, I know, I've used this video before. However, the Kings are currently leading 1-0 with a Kopitar goal, and unless the Canucks pull off a comeback, we'll be dealing with the 5 stages of grief tonight. For the record, I'm already on stage 5.

Coconuts go.

Okay, enough of the regicide themes for the gamethreads. This game will have live threads planned depending on how the game goes, which means there might be a 3rd period thread where we are all bawling our eyes out. Tonight, we unfortunately face our first elimination game. If the Canucks can win tonight, they can extend the series and attempt one of those historical comebacks we hear so much about. However, if the Kings win, Vancouver's out. We will have Cory Schneider back in net, and Daniel Sedin is returning early (maybe too early?) from concussion to help out. Will it be enough?

Coconuts go.

My goodness, the first week of the playoffs became anarchy, didn't it? From big upsets to crazy goaltending to millions of dangerous hits, it has been absolutely ridiculous. Tonight, we finally get to our first elimination night of the post-season, with two teams on the verge of hitting the golf course.

4:30 pm PDT: Senators vs Rangers, Game 4. So far so good for the Rangers, who have Henrik Lundqvist and Brian Boyle leading them to a 2-1 series lead. Ottawa will need Craig Anderson to challenge King Henrik's dominance. Viewable on CBC.

4:30 pm PDT: Flyers vs Penguins, Game 4. Ah, our first possible elimination, with Philadelphia needing only one more win to eliminate their bitter rival. When I say "bitter rival", that is clearly an understatement, considering Game 3. James Neal and Arron Asham have been suspended, and Sidney Crosby proved to everyone that he can easily lose control when he doesn't get his way, just like a baby having a temper tantrum. Go play some golf, Sid. Viewable on TSN.

7:00 pm PDT: Kings vs Canucks, Game 4. Unfortunately, our game tonight is also an elimination one. There is an upside, though: at least we didn't humiliate ourselves as bad as Pittsburgh. Cory Schneider will be back in net, and Daniel Sedin expects to play. Viewable on CBC, gamethread will go up right at 7:00.

Go catfights. Oh, and also go Flyers.

Yes, I know. It is hard to wait for Wednesday to come around. Especially since there will be two elimination games on hand: the Flyers can eliminate the Penguins, and (gulp) the Kings could eliminate the Canucks. In the meantime, we'll have to watch these other 3 series, where they all look very close:

4:00 pm PDT: Devils vs Panthers, Game 3. Florida won their first playoff game in 15 years the other night to tie the series, but New Jersey will look to retake the series lead on home ice. Viewable on TSN.

4:30 pm PDT: Red Wings vs Predators, Game 4. Nashville got back the series lead the other night, but Detroit won't ever let them get away with it. Viewable on CBC.

6:00 pm PDT: Blackhawks vs Coyotes, Game 3. Chicago tied up the series, and looks to build that momentum as the series moves into Chicago's aptly-named "Madhouse". Viewable on TSN, will likely be shafted to TSN2 to start.

Go catfights.

Canucks vs Kings coverage

Inigo Montoya: Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
Inigo advances on Rugen, but stumbles into the table with sudden pain. Rugen attacks, but Inigo parries and rises to his feet again.
Inigo Montoya: Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die.
Rugen attacks again, Inigo parries more fiercely, gaining strength .
Inigo Montoya: Hello! My name is Inigo Montoya! You killed my father! Prepare to die!
Count Rugen: Stop saying that!
Rugen attacks, twice. Inigo avoids and wounds Rugen in both shoulders, the same spots where he wounded Inigo. Inigo attacks, bellowing:
Inigo Montoya: HELLO! MY NAME IS INIGO MONTOYA! YOU KILLED MY FATHER! PREPARE TO DIE!
Inigo corners Count Rugen, knocks his sword aside, and slashes his cheek, giving him a scar just like Inigo's.
Inigo Montoya: Offer me money.
Count Rugen: Yes!
Inigo Montoya: Power, too, promise me that.
He slashes his other cheek .
Count Rugen: All that I have and more. Please...
Inigo Montoya: Offer me anything I ask for.
Count Rugen: Anything you want...
Rugen knocks Inigo's sword aside and lunges. But Inigo traps his arm and aims his sword at Rugen's stomach.
Inigo Montoya: I want my father back, you son of a bitch!
He runs Count Rugen through and shoves him back against the table. Rugen falls to the floor, dead.

Coconuts go, KILL THE KINGS!

Canucks vs Kings coverage

Inigo Montoya: But this is Buttercup's true love - If you heal him, he will stop Humperdinck's wedding.
Miracle Max: Wait. Wait. I make him better, Humperdinck suffers?
Inigo Montoya: Humiliations galore!
Miracle Max: That is a noble cause. Give me the sixty-five, I'm on the job.

Coconuts go, KILL THE KINGS!

As the Canucks attempt to get into the series, Vigneault made the bold move of putting Cory Schneider in net tonight instead of Roberto Luongo. Will this motivate our boys against the Kings?

Inigo Montoya: My father was slaughtered by a six-fingered man. He was a great swordmaker, my father. When the six-fingered man appeared and requested a special sword. My father took the job. He slaved a year before it was done. (shows the Man in Black the sword)
Man in Black: I've never seen its equal.
Inigo Montoya: The six-fingered man returned and demanded it, but at one tenth his promised price, my father refused. Without a word, the six-fingered man slashed him through the heart. I loved my father. So naturally, I challenged his murderer to a duel. I failed. The six-fingered man left me alive, but he gave me these. (strokes the scars on his cheeks)
Man in Black: How old were you?
Inigo Montoya: I was eleven years old. And when I was strong enough, I dedicated my life to the study of fencing. So the next time we meet, I will not fail. I will go up to the six-fingered man and say, "Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."

Coconuts go, KILL THE KINGS!!!!!!!!!

Don't you just love this time of year? You can legitimately spend all weekend on the couch watching hockey. It's awesome. Here's the even more spread-out lineup for today:

9:00 am PST: Red Wings vs Predators, Game 3. Detroit managed to tie up the series last game, and will look to keep the momentum going with 2 games at Joe Louis Arena. Viewable on CBC.

12:00 pm PST: Flyers vs Penguins, Game 3. What happened, Pittsburgh? How is it that Sidney Crosby and Evgeni Malkin have been useless against the likes of Claude Giroux and Sean Couturier?? Viewable on TSN.

4:30 pm PST: Panthers vs Devils, Game 2. Okay, New Jersey beat them soundly in their 1st game, but that doesn't mean I've lost my bet of Florida winning the series. It can still be done, just without the sweep. Viewable on TSN.

7:30 pm PST: Kings vs Canucks, Game 3. Our boys better get their damn butts in gear, and fix that silly powerplay. Viewable on CBC, gamethread will be up right at 7:30.

Go catfights.

Last night got brutal for us. Seriously, what the hell is wrong with our powerplay??? Anyways, since probably a few people are fighting hangovers, there is luckily an earlier game to keep us entertained. Here's what is on the plate today.

12:00 pm PST: Bruins vs Capitals, Game 2. Tim Thomas ended up with the overtime shutout last game, but Braden Holtby proved that he can stand on his head against Boston. Washington needs to start scoring, though. Viewable on CBC.

4:00 pm PST: Rangers vs Senators, Game 2. Despite a late attempt at a comeback last game, Ottawa still has some trouble against this New York team. Viewable on CBC.

4:30 pm PST: Blues vs Sharks, Game 2. San Jose got lucky getting the double-overtime winner the other night, and this series is looking to be a very close one. Viewable on TSN.

7:00 pm PST: Coyotes vs Blackhawks, Game 2. Martin Hanzal got the winner in overtime last game, and Shane Doan was all over the place. Jonathan Toews returned, but has definitely been a target for hits from Phoenix players. Viewable on TSN.

Go catfights.

One more period to go. Once more from Macbeth:

Is this a dagger which I see before me,

The handle toward my hand? Come, let me clutch thee.

I have thee not, and yet I see thee still.

Art thou not, fatal vision, sensible

To feeling as to sight? or art thou but

A dagger of the mind, a false creation,

Proceeding from the heat-oppressed brain?

Canucks have one period left here against the Kings. Coconuts go, KILL THE KINGS!

Some more Macbeth, this time from his wife:

But screw your courage to the sticking-place,

And we'll not fail. When Duncan is asleep

Whereto the rather shall his day's hard journey

Soundly invite him — his two chamberlains

Will I with wine and wassail so convince

That memory, the warder of the brain,

Shall be a fume, and the receipt of reason

A limbeck only. When in swinish sleep

Their drenched natures lie as in a death,

What cannot you and I perform upon

The unguarded Duncan? what not put upon

His spongy officers, who shall bear the guilt

Of our great quell?

Canucks and Kings head to the 2nd period. Coconuts go, KILL THE KINGS!

Tonight, the Canucks look to get the series tied back up against the Kings. The theme is the infamous Shakespeare play Macbeth.

The Prince of Cumberland! that is a step

On which I must fall down, or else o'erleap,

For in my way it lies. Stars, hide your fires,

Let not light see my black and deep desires;

The eye wink at the hand; yet let that be

Which the eye fears, when it is done, to see.

Coconuts go, KILL THE KINGS!