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No_glue_2

papigrande

Jun 14, 2008 Mar 12, 2010 53 5925

My name is Joe, I'm 17, and I live in Missouri. I have been clean since... oh, wait, wrong... yeah, nevermind.

It would be appropriate after reading that horrible Alcoholics Anonymous-parodying opening sentence and my Spinal Tap-referencing signature to assume that I am somewhat of a class clown on MHR. I have a tendency to hijack posts with van-related hijinks, and I like to make references to absurd early-nineties Saturday Night Live sketches (If Ed Hochuli were a hot dog, would you eat him?) and forgotten 1980's hair metal power ballads (my upcoming pieces: "Livin' on a Prayer: The Kyle Orton Saga," "I've got More Than a Feeling About Knowshon Moreno," "Good Times Really Bad Times: An Investigation of Mike Shanahan's Draft Strategery," and "Jay Cutler, Just Go Home Sweet Home.").

I also used to play football for my high school, but it took too much time away from my ninja training and my heavy metal band Poetic Injustice, in which I play the drums. Currently my skill level is like if John Bonham and Neil Peart had a son somehow, but he was retarded from having two dads and no mom so he couldn't play the drums. The band? Like if you crossed Boston with Anthrax.

In my free time I enjoy replaying my way through The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time. My favorite temple fluctuates between the Forest and Spirit Temples. My least favorite is the Water, which once took me seven hours (straight, with three bathroom breaks) to beat. My favorite boss is either Twinrova or Volvagia, and I always hated Bongo Bongo. He's scary.

Also, I win at fantasy football and I am the bane of Zappa's existence. And finally....

O o
/¯________________________________
| I'MMA FIRIN' MAH LAZOR BLAAAAAGH!!
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a fan of

St. Louis Cardinals Major League Baseball Team

Denver Nuggets National Basketball Association Team

Denver Broncos National Football League Team

Ricky Bobby NASCAR Driver(s)

Maria Sharapova is hot. Tennis Player(s)

Colorado Avalanche National Hockey League Team

Taylor Layne W (pleasedon'tkillme) Mixed Martial Artist(s)

Recent activity

Mile High Report Voted for All of the above - the more talent the better! on Mile High Report - 03/12/10 11:52 AM EST

Mile High Report Commented Granted, he would play DJ's spot. on What Just Happened and Who is the Replacement? on Mile High Report - 03/11/10 11:30 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented Spoon!! on What Just Happened and Who is the Replacement? on Mile High Report - 03/11/10 11:25 PM EST (5 replies)

Mile High Report Voted for Sean Weatherspoon on Mile High Report - 03/11/10 11:23 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented That's intriguing on Broncos release LB Andra Davis, DT J'Vonne Parker on Mile High Report - 03/11/10 6:56 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented Thanks Styg on Broncos release Kenny Peterson, waive G Mitch Erickson on Mile High Report - 03/11/10 3:58 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented And did that fake punt for a TD in the preseason? on Haze's Quick Draft Pt.3 on Mile High Report - 03/10/10 10:21 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented Wasn't he the guy that hit the scoreboard at Cowboys Stadium? on Haze's Quick Draft Pt.3 on Mile High Report - 03/10/10 10:20 PM EST (2 replies)

Mile High Report Commented I like it on Scout.com: Vladimir Ducasse Profile on Mile High Report - 03/10/10 10:15 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented Random question on Broncos release Kenny Peterson, waive G Mitch Erickson on Mile High Report - 03/10/10 10:10 PM EST (2 replies)

Mile High Report Commented Indeed. on Broncos release Kenny Peterson, waive G Mitch Erickson on Mile High Report - 03/10/10 10:09 PM EST (3 replies)

Mile High Report Commented Woo!! on Alabama ILB Rolando McClain became winded at the Crimson Tide's Pro Day Wednesday, and revealed... on Mile High Report - 03/10/10 9:35 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented On Spanish MHR on The Loser's Curse and the NFL Draft on Mile High Report - 03/10/10 5:59 PM EST (2 replies)

Mile High Report Commented I think we can do a lot better than Hadnot on Broncos sign DT Jamal Williams on Mile High Report - 03/09/10 7:18 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented DL Rotation on Broncos sign DT Jamal Williams on Mile High Report - 03/09/10 6:45 PM EST (3 replies)

Mile High Report Recommended a comment on Mile High Report - 03/09/10 6:29 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented I don't know if it will be that rigid. on Broncos sign DT Jamal Williams on Mile High Report - 03/09/10 6:21 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented Wow... on Broncos sign DT Jamal Williams on Mile High Report - 03/09/10 6:19 PM EST (4 replies)

Mile High Report Commented Huge relief on Broncos sign DT Jamal Williams on Mile High Report - 03/09/10 6:18 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented Does this mean that next year we're going to sign 47 linebackers? on Broncos sign DT Jamal Williams on Mile High Report - 03/09/10 6:16 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented Big =/= good. on Lombardi: Expect Broncos to set up private workout with Tebow on Mile High Report - 03/08/10 4:53 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented Jimmy Paige? lol on Horse Tracks - 3/8/10 -- Happy 6th Birthday, Jordyn! on Mile High Report - 03/08/10 4:42 PM EST

Mile High Report Voted for 4-0 on Mile High Report - 03/08/10 4:30 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented Odd... on Visions of Sugar Plums - The Value of Brandon Marshall on Mile High Report - 03/06/10 8:48 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented Prater? on Broncos sign DL Justin Bannan and CB Nathan Jones on Mile High Report - 03/05/10 10:00 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented With this signing on Broncos sign DL Justin Bannan and CB Nathan Jones on Mile High Report - 03/05/10 9:53 PM EST (3 replies)

Mile High Report Commented Nah, just tired on Mile High Report 2010 Free Agency Open Thread #1 on Mile High Report - 03/05/10 12:04 AM EST

Mile High Report Commented OK... bedtime. on Mile High Report 2010 Free Agency Open Thread #1 on Mile High Report - 03/05/10 12:02 AM EST (4 replies)

NetsDaily Voted for 7-8: They're making history. on NetsDaily - 03/04/10 5:11 PM EST

Mile High Report Voted for One who aims for winning multiple SBs (even if it takes longer to get there) on Mile High Report - 03/01/10 3:54 PM EST

Mile High Report Recommended With the 56th Pick In The Draft, The Green Bay Packers Select: Jerry Hughes, OLB, TCU on Mile High Report - 02/28/10 4:40 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented Never hit a drunk with your pitching hand. on Broncos RB Off the Hook in Assault Case | TMZ.com on Mile High Report - 02/25/10 2:09 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Voted for No on Mile High Report - 02/25/10 1:52 PM EST

Mile High Report Voted for Yes. on Mile High Report - 02/24/10 10:08 PM EST

Mile High Report Voted for Yes on Mile High Report - 02/24/10 7:08 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented This was brought up in the other post but on Coin Flip for 10 to be Held On Friday on Mile High Report - 02/24/10 5:00 PM EST (2 replies)

Mile High Report Voted for Eric Olsen on Mile High Report - 02/23/10 1:55 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented I can see it on MOCK DRAFT! (Just Kidding, It's Another Uniform Concept) on Mile High Report - 02/22/10 6:56 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented I'm curious about this on MOCK DRAFT! (Just Kidding, It's Another Uniform Concept) on Mile High Report - 02/22/10 6:40 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Voted for I like it on Mile High Report - 02/22/10 6:34 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented lmao on MOCK DRAFT! (Just Kidding, It's Another Uniform Concept) on Mile High Report - 02/22/10 6:29 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented Added a poll on MOCK DRAFT! (Just Kidding, It's Another Uniform Concept) on Mile High Report - 02/22/10 6:27 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented OK, so you can't see the shoulder numbers on MOCK DRAFT! (Just Kidding, It's Another Uniform Concept) on Mile High Report - 02/22/10 6:24 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented Absolutely, the '80s had some of my favorite uniforms ever on MOCK DRAFT! (Just Kidding, It's Another Uniform Concept) on Mile High Report - 02/22/10 6:22 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented lol thanks Zap. on MOCK DRAFT! (Just Kidding, It's Another Uniform Concept) on Mile High Report - 02/22/10 6:20 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Voted for Andre Roberts on Mile High Report - 02/22/10 6:09 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented I still haven't decided on MOCK DRAFT! (Just Kidding, It's Another Uniform Concept) on Mile High Report - 02/22/10 5:46 PM EST

Mile High Report Posted MOCK DRAFT! (Just Kidding, It's Another Uniform Concept) on Mile High Report - 02/22/10 5:26 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented Oh dammit. on MHR's Live Interactive Mock Draft - Take One on Mile High Report - 02/21/10 1:53 PM EST (2 replies)

Mile High Report Commented I promise I'll take it seriously on MHR's Live Interactive Mock Draft - Take One on Mile High Report - 02/21/10 1:52 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented I used to cheer for the Broncos and the Chiefs on A Breath of Fresh Orange... on Mile High Report - 02/20/10 12:43 PM EST

Mile High Report Voted for Hell Nah!!!! on Mile High Report - 02/20/10 12:38 PM EST

Mile High Report Voted for John Skelton on Mile High Report - 02/20/10 12:38 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented Blech on Found this guy on Flickr doing some nice redesigns of NFL uniforms. Here's his Broncos alternate... on Mile High Report - 02/19/10 10:43 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented I picked the best ones in the league (except Romo) on Answers in Search of a Question: The Myth of the Long Ball on Mile High Report - 02/19/10 6:30 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented Retired on Answers in Search of a Question: The Myth of the Long Ball on Mile High Report - 02/19/10 6:27 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented Still, I'd only put Romo in that third tier with Orton and Schaub. Maybe 9th. on Answers in Search of a Question: The Myth of the Long Ball on Mile High Report - 02/19/10 6:25 PM EST (3 replies)

Mile High Report Commented Forgot Romo. on Answers in Search of a Question: The Myth of the Long Ball on Mile High Report - 02/19/10 6:24 PM EST (2 replies)

Mile High Report Commented Idk man, I still don't buy it. on Answers in Search of a Question: The Myth of the Long Ball on Mile High Report - 02/19/10 6:23 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented Let's see. on Answers in Search of a Question: The Myth of the Long Ball on Mile High Report - 02/19/10 6:21 PM EST (2 replies)

Mile High Report Commented Still, everyone knew we would be going deep or trying to get it out of bounds on Answers in Search of a Question: The Myth of the Long Ball on Mile High Report - 02/19/10 6:10 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented Yeah,because it's so easy to go deep when everyone in the stadium knows you have to. on Answers in Search of a Question: The Myth of the Long Ball on Mile High Report - 02/19/10 6:08 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Commented Thank you BShrout on Answers in Search of a Question: The Myth of the Long Ball on Mile High Report - 02/19/10 6:07 PM EST (1 reply)

Mile High Report Voted for Too many! on Mile High Report - 02/19/10 4:25 PM EST

Mile High Report Commented When I read the title on Will Jeremy Bates trade for Brandon Marshall ? on Mile High Report - 02/18/10 10:09 PM EST (2 replies)

Mile High Report Voted for Have a long term relationship (playoff bound) on Mile High Report - 02/15/10 11:08 AM EST

Mile High Report Commented "The greatest quarterback of all time is the one who could excel in all five eras." on Whitlock's Article - 10 greatest QCs of all - time on Mile High Report - 02/13/10 5:20 PM EST

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