SB Nation User Blog: rangerjae

I Like the White Sox: Reflections

rangerjae — Tue, 29 Sep 2009 00:17:02 -0000

Aww fuck it. That's all you can say this year.

We all got together and saw Gavin Floyd find his balls this year, and saw some excellent fireworks.

We witnessed history as Paul Konerko and Jermaine Dye both hit home run number 300 back to back against the team who may very well win this cursed division.

We watched as Scott Linebrink gave up home run after home run after home run after home run...

We saw history written as Mark Buehrle threw a perfect game and then a few more perfect innings afterwards.

We watched as Alexei Ramirez forgot to play shortstop some of the time.

We watched as a new star emerged and for Beckham not to win rookie of the year would be simply unacceptable.

We saw a great prospect get traded for the sequel of Tony Pena, which usually isn't as good as the original.

We watched as goggles and Fields butchered third base quite worse than people with long fingernails.

We watched and waited for Q to return to his dreamy self, and ended up enduring a nightmare.

We watched big Jim hit many homeruns, only to be reunited with his good friend who took a substance, but didn't kill anyone.

We watched as Scotty Podsednik wowed us all with his awesome batting average, his inability to field, and unbelievable base running errors.

We watched Bobby Jenks blow a few saves, but it must have been the kidney stones.

We watched as President Barrack Obama mispronounced Dwayne Wise's name.

We saw a $70 million player join our team to give us $10 output.

We saw our GM make a splash at free agency deadline with 2 minutes left by signing a Cy Young winning pitcher who was on the DL.

We saw our manager take his frustrations out on the poor NCAA.

Yes it was quite a year here in the south side. In some ways good, and others bad.

But at the end of the day it all boils down to one thing...

I like the White Sox.

I really appreciated all your comments, and loved meeting you all on the fateful night in early June. Especially drinking many beers with LT. Thanks for being here, and thanks for making my morning more fun coming here to the good ol' SSS.

Mike

Phinsider Power Rankings-Week One

rangerjae — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 12:23:03 -0000

Well here we go again, its football season, and it ended after week one for us Dolphin fans. We have a crappy QB, a shitty line, and a slippery fingered TE. Yeah we're screwed. Come one guys, CP10 will turn it around, Big Tony will get the O Line in check, and Fasano will not do it again. We're a good team and Indy better look out because they're coming into our house.

I did this power ranking thing last year a couple times, and now I am going to try to do it every week. Especially this week, where we can use some stupid humor. So here goes it...

By the way these were stolen by ESPN.

1-DOLPHINS-Yeah they sucked, but they're still our favorite. After all, Miami has the Dolphins.

2-STEELERS-Any team that can put the fear of God into Larry Fitzgerald when they are not even playing the Cardinals is A OK by me.

3-PATRIOTS-Are you kidding me? ESPN get Tom Brady's rod out of your mouth. They would have lost that game if it weren't for the young lad who doesn't take the knee on the touchback.

4-NY GIANTS-This team has Superbowl written all over it because they don't have any players who will shoot themselves in the leg this year.

5-EAGLES-When they go into the Dog Pound in Cleveland, their new quarterback will definitely take charge.

6-COLTS-Yeah you guys did well against one team from Florida, you think you can do it two weeks in a row? Yeah I didn't think so either.

7-FALCONS-Perhaps you can add the Miami Dolphins O-Line as your 13th man for that victory on Sunday, because Matt Ryan and his receivers sure didn't know what was going on.

8-VIKINGS-You have an iguana as a running back. Did anyone see that disturbing Nike commercial with Adrian Peterson? Oh, and yeah, you get number eight because you have captain indecision.

9-TITANS-Once again, if you name your team after a condom, you're going to get fucked.

10-RAVENS-No Rex Ryan, no problem, they're still ripping teams to shreds.

11-PACKERS-No Brett Favre, no problem...wait that was last year. Aaron Rodgers, you rock dude.

12-SAINTS-Winning the NFC should be a Brees.

13-COWBOYS-It doesn't matter how big your stadium is, or that you can't properly punt a ball there, your team still blows.

14-SEAHAWKS-I forgot Matt Hasselbeck was playing football. I thought he was going to join his wife on that womens talk show in the morning.

15-BEARS-I thought Grossman was traded last year.

16-JETS-G-A-Y GAY GAY GAY!!!

17-CARDINALS-You're magical storybook season was last year, and this year Fitzgerald is going down sometime. It has been written by EA Sports. Its in the game bitches.

18-49ERS-I wonder if Singletary dropped his pants again. Perhaps that's why they beat the NFC Champs.

19-REDSKINS-Do you know how many Big Mac's Albert Haynesworth can buy with that money they gave him? He would most likely eat them all too.

20-BILLS-This teams sucks so bad, even TO is speechless.

21-PANTHERS-Jake Delhomme will be keeping his job, I guess. Maybe he can replace Pennington, to all you playa haters.

22-TEXANS-No tea in Texas again this year.

23-BRONCOS-It has become apparent that God is a fan so far this year.

24-JAGUARS-Hey guys, thanks for softening up Indy for us.

25-BENGALS-I saw your show on HBO called Oz. It rocked!

26-RAIDERS-The "commitment" to excellence continues. Perhaps the commitment of AL Davis should begin.

27-BROWNS-There could be a chance that Brady Quinn is injured. Don't expect Mangina to tell you though.

28-BUCCANEERS-Get out of Florida. Walk the plank. The Dolphins will eat you.

29-CHIEFS-Hey Zach, you want to come back too?

30-LIONS- 0-17, hey Stafford welcome to the NFL boy!

31-RAMS-They're still playing. No way!

Hope you enjoyed. Go Dolphins!!!!!!

PS I just realized I forgot the Chargers. Oh well. We'll get them next week, like the Dolphins will get a win next week.

I Like the White Sox: But Hate Everyone Else

rangerjae — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 11:30:03 -0000

First off METRODOME, You suck! Good riddings you astro turf piece of crap, with your kitchen garbage bags as a roof. You big piece of shit. You have housed some of the players that we love to hate, but have to respect some times because they play well. You know that their manager does a good job, and they find a way to win win win. You know what else I hate about the Twins? I remember their old school logo with the two ball players and it says Twins Win on the top. I used to think there was something wrong with those two guys. Then I realized it was the whole team. The T & C on their hat means total crap! Not twin cities!

To the Cubs on our date not with destiny today: You suck too! You think you are the pride and joy of this city. Let's be honest. We know what your team is about. The old guy managing your team right into the toilet, and then he says he has no answers for the media. Soriano with his hop, skip, jump, and injure. Zambrano with his anger, and board game with his racial paranoia. What a season for Cub fans huh? It has been more like a tabloid over in the north side than a baseball season. Anyways, just to keep the comedy show going, I am pushing for Carlos Torres to get his first major league win over you guys, Beckham hitting another homer, and Thome jumping on a plane just to hit one off you shitbirds! You know what the C on their hat means? It doesn't mean Chicago or Cubs, it means crap with a capital C.

To the Tigers, yeah you in first now: You're so good. Bless you boys. That's right, that's what you are boys! And once we get our shit together, we are going to waste you. Well, maybe it’s too late for that. But I am still blasting Don't Stop Believing even though we’re supposedly out of this thing. Hey placebo Polanco, you think you're going to be able to catch a line drive from AJ in the infield? You'll have a better chance of catching swine flu, which I don't wish on anyone. Except Michael Vick. That's a different story. Hey Verlander, why don't you shave that silly looking moustache of yours? Don't worry, one of our hitters will when they hit your 98 MPH fastball. You know, you're lucky there's no C on your hat!

To the Chicago media: Can we please stop being gay and calling the Thome/Contreras trade "White Flag II?" This isn't a white flag trade. We all know there is no way the Sox win the World Series. So Thome went to a team that could possibly do so, and we got what looks to be a decent pitcher for Contreras? Can't be much worse than Count. Did Kenny throw in the towel? Maybe so, however if we go on a run, we can still win the division only to get knocked out in the ALDS. So shut the fuck up media. Go make fun of the Cubs some more. After all, I guess Milton Bradley crying about racism is front page news right you stoners? You know what the C on both of your papers...yeah we all get the idea.

To the Dodgers: Yep, we had to buddy up to you at Camelback Ranch and you looked out for your Dodger fans and made the prices as high as the smog rate in your fine city. We had to endure the saga of Manny as if you would sign him or not, and then how he takes woman pills with steroids. You came into our stadium and we raised the prices for you guys for some reason. Well now its payback time. You better win the WS so our boy Jim Thome can come back to the White Sox next year with a ring, because lord knows we're not getting one this year.

All I can say is yesterday's game is still in my mind because I did not expect that to happen. Hopefully, we can do something here, and we'll have something else to talk about. Perhaps we need to have another meet up. All I know is win or lose, I love the White Sox. They are the best. Even when they screw up, they are still my team. Hopefully we can see an unlikely miracle happen, but you know how these things go kids.

Have a nice day.

I Like the White Sox: I Want to But...

rangerjae — Thu, 27 Aug 2009 15:45:44 -0000

Is it over? Our glorious rebuilding run of 2009? Done? Finis? Kaput?

Can you compare this season to when you have that old relative sitting in a hospital that's dying and in pain and the only way to help them find peace is pull the plug?

After watching this team the last few weeks, I would venture to say yes. Yet, the loyalty to the White Sox, and my bad judgment wants to say no. 4 ½ back? Yeah, pretty bad. One more against the Botox Sox, then the Bronx, and the Terrordome. Looks hopeless. Nevertheless a wise man in 2005 said "don't stop believing." Look what happened there. Yes, endless optimism. I'm full of it and other stuff too.

Scotty Pods, you can't allow yourself to get picked off from second and third and then think when you hit a homer its all good. Alexei Ramirez, you need to focus! Get some Ritalin or some other crap that helps people. Whatever you do, don't dress Cuban. The Count start again? No way Jose. I think we would have better luck trying one of those kids out at the fundamentals deck to be our 4th than him. What took so long Ozzie? It's a shame the C&C Rehab Factory didn't work out. Now its just Freddy, who can sweat, and I like and want to see good things for. Dotel, go tell! Tell your agent you're free next season. Perhaps you can take Liney with you and go play some charity golf game with a bunch of Cub fans. The two of you belong in the north side with the rest of the overpaid veterans they have not doing jack shit. JD, go to the mountain and find your mojo. We need you dude!!!! We know you can do it.

Dear number 56. We would like to know what happened to the pitcher who won 9 games before the All Star break and the perfect game. Are you out there with Obama looking for a player named Weiss? Can this Weiss pitch better than you? Is he going to lead us to the promised land in October? Didn't think so. Come on Mark, find your power animal and pitch like you want to win.

Jake Peavy, your time will come. Please don't rush. With or without you, the White Sox will continue to make a mockery of themselves this week on the road. Let's hope that Detroit does the same since we have the Twinkies in the dome this week. If you want to help, go to church, take your communion, and pray that we will come out of this road trip in one piece. Like 3-4 games back only. We need you next year as we hopefully will destroy the entire AL.

I want to see the White Sox win this division while they're rebuilding. I am hungry for it now. I really shouldn't be, but wouldn't it be cool if it happens? For one more year, when they all said they couldn't, they did. Down to the wire just like last year baby. No game 163. Just win the whole thing before 162. We can do this, right guys?

Someone give me some Advil when I wake up and feel all hung over.

Laters!

A Little Something I Wrote

rangerjae — Fri, 21 Aug 2009 13:51:37 -0000

I know the Michael Vick thing is over, but I wrote something on my site at hiimmichael.com and just wanted to get your feedback.

Michael Vick can Suck a...

Hello. As many of you know, I am passionate about animals. I live a vegetarian lifestyle for the reason that I have compassion for animals and the suffering they go through because the "food" industry believes they are an essential part of survival. Well I along with many other vegans and veggies out there sure have disproved that myth. When one eats animals they make a choice; they don't need to. However, I think one thing that my carnivore friends and I agree on is that what Michael Vick did is just plain wrong. Bringing up animals to "compete" and electrocuting them when they lose by far can be classified the one of the most psychotic and thoughtless acts I have ever encountered in my life.

So Michael Vick served jail time. Well that's all and good, but why he's granted a chance to play football and make millions of dollars again makes absolutely no sense to me. He was signed by the Philadelphia Eagles for 1 year $1.6 million dollar deal with a 2010 option. This man, a role model for the city of Atlanta took that position, wiped his ass with it, and threw the paper at all the citizens of that city when he committed the heinous crime of killing man's best friend. And now, the city of brotherly love (except for when it comes to sports because Philly fans have anger issues) has embraced the doggie killer for now.

Michael Vick is a half ass quarterback that can really run the ball. His presence in Philly should be interesting from a sports perspective; however I could give a shit about that. You see in Miami, we did something special in football last year. It was called the Wildcat and brother, it don't get much more special than that. (Actually yeah it does. We moved the dash over one space to the right from 1-15 one season to 11-5 the next) What would be really special if someone in Philly let a big Doberman onto the field and before Vick is about to throw that bomb, the dog bites his arm off for revenge for all the canines he had killed.

Does everyone in life get second chances? Sure, but what has Vick done to redeem himself? He went to jail. Guess what? You committed a crime of course you go to jail. He is doing community service work. That was park of his plea deal, and of course being a "celeb", he gets to sit home in his big ass house and play X Box, after committing unspeakable crimes. Has Vick gone to shelters to try to help find homes for many dogs out there that need one? No that doesn't mean go to the shelter and adopt one. We saw how that worked out last time. In my opinion, he needs to earn his spot. The fact he was signed for a mill is bullshit. I knew when he was eligible to play, someone would scoop him up.

I think it comes down to when you are rich and famous (or infamous in this case), you can do whatever and the consequences are usually light. Then you get to go back to your fairy tale of a life, get to bang your hot trophy life, and cut the rest of society with a knife. I guess the best thing that came out of this is that Dennis Green was wrong. Parcels had NO INTEREST in bringing Vick to south Florida. So I can you can crown him, you can crown his ass with the dunce cap. In closing, I wish Michael Vick's feet were held to the fire to help animals in some way, and I just wish he had to earn his million, because lets face it kids, that is not the NFL minimum.

I Like the White Sox: The Top 10

rangerjae — Fri, 21 Aug 2009 12:47:29 -0000

Hi kids. So it has been a month and a half since the perfect game and Mark Buehrle did the Top 10 list on Dave Letterman. So I decided to make a top 10 regarding our White Sox as a whole right now.

TOP 10 THINGS THAT ASSURE YOU OF THE FACT YOU ARE A WHITE SOX FAN (AND MOST LIKELY PART OF THE SSS FAMILY)

10-You know what the acronym BHB means. 12 wins and he shaves so he will be known as BSB then.

9-You wonder how much tobacco Pods chews whenever he comes up to bat. It looks like someone inserted one of those crazy balls in his cheek. If you haven't noticed it before, I assure you will now.

8-Sometimes you wish AJ would do the sign of the cross when a guy is sitting on first. Perhaps God could help him throw out more base runners trying to swipe a base.

7-You may have noticed no one on the team has number 7 anymore due to a wannabe center field has cursed the number for all eternity.

6-If you have ever the chance to meet Nick Swisher, you would like to make his chin blue with a little shade of black, not pink as he likes to.

5-You think Che is a shortstop and not a historical figure that fought for independence.

4-There are two saviors in your life. Jesus and Bacon.

3-You wonder why in the history of baseball, we are the only team that signed a pitcher for tons of money that is currently on the DL. Yet we're OK with the decision because our GM has another 69 million reasons to show the world he has the biggest pair in baseball.

2-You can count the number of starting pitchers used this year with both hands.

1-You either need pepto, vodka, miller, tums, downers, pot, God, or some other kind of medication to help you get through the carnival ride that makes the Zipper look like a children's ride known as the 2009 Chicago White Sox baseball season.

It's kind of like there was the Sizzler, and then the Super Sizzler. We all cringed during the 08 season, but this one has been a little more exciting (not in a good way) with the inconsistent offense, the incoherent defense, and the C&C rehab factory making you sweat. Approximately one month to go until October, and next week as they say in Apocalypse Now, we're going into the shit. Charlie is all over. Brace yourselves people, we are about to climb that hill again.

On a personal note, many of you have entertained me all week. I try to return the favor. Let the shit sling on this one guys.

I Like the White Sox: Enjoying Life

rangerjae — Fri, 07 Aug 2009 13:10:46 -0000

What a week. Wining 5 out of 7 against first place teams. Not bad. Just waiting for number 56 to get out of his hangover and we move on. Beckham hitting .411 in his last 20, solid! The biggest trade in the history of trades with player on the DL. What more can you ask for as a White Sox fan right now.

I usually post psycho babble and random thoughts, but today I want to ask a serious question. I believe that if Bacon doesn't win Rookie of the Year if he continues playing the way he's playing, its highway robbery. If Buehrle can pull off another 4-5 wins, you can make the case for him to win a Cy Young. Not only has he pitched a perfect game, but he retired 45 consecutive batters. He keeps his ERA low and wins about 15-16 games and if the Sox make the playoffs, I think you can make an argument for that.

However, the case I want to make is for Scott Podsenik for MVP IF the White Sox make the playoffs and go beyond the DS. Now before anyone flames me, I want you to think about this. The most obvious is where are the Sox without him? Possibly stuck in a battle for 3rd and 4th with Cleveland and KC. He is batting .300, and OPS is a modest .750, but he has been the fire starter for this White Sox team and has helped drive in runs. His BA with RISP with 2 outs is .302 and with bases loaded is .500. When a man is on 3rd, he is hitting .444. I wouldn't let the low average fool you. Plus he has been decent with the glove this year for the most part. However the Sox didn't start winning until Podsednik starting hitting.

Perhaps I'm a stoner and I have no clue wtf I'm talking about. I think you can look at Joe Mauer and Bobby Abreu, and probably make a better case for the two of them. However, if the White Sox do some damage, win the Central and go beyond, Scotty Pods needs a look at least, because he has been the most valuable player on this team, and my definition of MVP is a player who has made the difference in making or breaking a team. We should have a most disposable player award here on SSS every year. One for our team and one for the league.

Other comments, bye bye Brian Anderson. See you and your whinny ass self sometime in the future. We know to throw that outside slider to you so if you are up against our pitchers, go grab some bench. Clayton Richard, its been fun. Thanks for the memories and the hole in my stomach when its time to make a routine throw to first and you're on the mound. Bobby Jenks, CRANBERRY JUICE BRO!

Other than that, have a wonderful day.

Mark Buehrle jersey update $44.00 jerseys!!!

rangerjae — Wed, 05 Aug 2009 11:40:32 -0000

Mark Buehrle jersey update $44.00 jerseys!!!

I put this post up and said I would update you guys when I got the jersey in the mail. So I just recieved my new black Mark Buehrle jersey. It is very nice looking and it is not missing the L like in the picture and has the diamond as well. So I would say if you want a jersey, go for it! I am very happy with mine, and it says its authentic, but you never know coming from China. I am only worried about how it looks and that it doesn't fall apart on me and it is spelled correctly. Happy shopping!!!

Twins want O-Cab????

rangerjae — Mon, 27 Jul 2009 14:39:55 -0000

Twins want O-Cab????

For your amusement! The Twins are putting the band back together, with a different name?

Mark Buehrle jerseys $44.00????

rangerjae — Fri, 24 Jul 2009 17:15:53 -0000

Mark Buehrle jerseys $44.00????

OK so I just placed my order for the black one. I will let you guys know when it comes and if this is legit!!!! I hope so!!!!! I want a black Buehrle jersey especially after yesterday!!!!