SB Nation User Blog: turnituptoeleven

Pick 'Em: 190 Footers -- Majesky's or Schultz's?

turnituptoeleven — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 14:46:04 -0000

Every so often, the Hockey Gods smile on our little operation. Every so often, Caps fans get to see the Hockey Gods rain shit on another organization. My God, those are beautiful moments.

I ask you this: When it comes to opposition goalies mimicking blocks of Emmental, which keep makes the bigger fool of himself -- Caron or Pavelec?

Which Caps defender's clearing attempt is more entertaining -- Majesky's or Schultz's?

Coincidentally, both tallies marked the blueliners' first goal on the season.

Majesky vs. The Pens

and here @ #5:

Schultz vs. The Thrash

Poll

Your favorite?

Schultz's

23 votes

Majesky's

24 votes

47 votes | Poll has closed

Pick 'Em: '97, '02, or '08 Red Wings

turnituptoeleven — Sun, 06 Sep 2009 23:37:07 -0000

Hockey's Greatest Teams lists the '97 Red Wings as one of the fifteen greatest teams of all time. I can't say I agree, but it raises a question: Of the stellar puck-moving Wings squads, which is the best? I ask this in honor of Knuble's signing.

Via Hockey-Reference.com:

The 1997 Wings Roster

The 2002 Wings Roster

The 2008 Wings Roster

Give me the 2002 roster. The '97's version of the Green Unit was incredible, but the additions of Hull, Hasek, an emerging Datsyuk, and Robitaille to complement Lidstrom, Feds, Yzerman, Shanny, Holmstrom, Larionov, Chelios, and the Grind Line 2.0... That's a nasty, nasty Hockey club.

[Ed. Note: Formatting fail, so I re-worked it a little - JP]

Poll

Thoughts, feelings, complaints, or rip-offs?

1997

65 votes

2002

88 votes

2008

21 votes

174 votes | Poll has closed

Parise or Getzlaf? Cognitive Wrist Slashing

turnituptoeleven — Fri, 24 Jul 2009 11:57:47 -0000

As we wait for Fehr to develop into something more than a john who couldn't finish in a whorehouse with a fistful of benjies, I ask this: Straight up, do you take Zach Parise or Ryan Getzlaf?

Getzlaf: 297/88/182/270, One ring, 2x all star.... 25-66-91 in his best season

Parise: 326/122/131/253 1x all star, 1x second team all star.... 45-49-94 in his best season

I like rebels; how dare someone score 94 points playing for Jersey? I'm going with Parise, but it's close.

Poll

Getzlaf or Parise?

Getzlaf

75 votes

Parise

45 votes

120 votes | Poll has closed

Malkin or Lindros?

turnituptoeleven — Wed, 13 May 2009 07:16:47 -0000

If you could choose either player in his prime...

Malkin

2X Hart finalist, 2X Pearson nominee, 1 Art Ross, Calder winner, 1.25 career P/G, 1.16 career playoff P/G, 1 Cup finals appearance

Lindros

1X Hart winner, 1X Pearson winner, Art Ross runner up by default, 1.13 career P/G, 1.07 career playoff P/G, 1 Cup finals appearance

During the 2002 games, I asked one of my friends who'd just gotten his Green Card whether he was for his native Canadians, or his newly beloved Yanks:

"It's hard to go against my roots, but Lindros can be such a bitch. I hope the US takes it to him hard and often. I hate to say it, but 'Go team USA'"

And there you are.

Personally, I'd take Lindros in his prime. He really was the complete package before he had his twenty or so concussions. Malkin hasn't peaked yet, so the question is a terrible one, but the two are so similar.

Thoughts? Feelings?

Poll

Lindros or Malkin?

Lindros

13 votes

Malkin

33 votes

46 votes | Poll has closed

The Bell Tolls For Thee, Caps Fans: The Caps Fight Song Contest Starts Now

turnituptoeleven — Wed, 15 Apr 2009 07:31:42 -0000

A subscription to The New Yorker is among the prerequisites for being a pretentious asshole. A subscription to Esquire is among the prerequisites for being a wannabe pretentious asshole. Having neither the money nor the Harvard accent, my existence lies in the latter. I'm fine with it; Esquire's a hell of a publication.

I present The Angry German:

But one thing that really should change here, and that goes for all U.S. sports, is the fan chants. They are weak and utterly uncreative. Basically, every team has the same "Let's go Team, clap-clap clap-clap-clap" or "Other Team sucks."

America's (unfair) reputation for stupidity and ignorance unashamedly manifests itself during my every trip to the VC.

Let's go Sabres!

--SABRES SUCK!!!

It's a very tired act. This is my proposal to every Caps fan: Think NCAA. Think Premier League.

TTT received thirty essays for The Psychology of the Fan contest, and while I don't have centre ice suite tickets this time around, a $25 gift card at NHL.com is worth five minutes of your time. I want a Caps fight song. Get on it.

Contest rules

1. Originality shall reign supreme. Changing "He plays on the left/ He plays on the riiiiight/ That boy Ronaldo made England look shite" to "He shoots from the left/ He shoots from the riiiight/ Our boy Ovechkin makes Crosby look shite" will not fly.

2. Vulgarities should enhance, not dominate.

3. Any and all cheap shots are encouraged -- bonus points if you can slam both Philly and Pittsburgh in the same song.

4. PC nazis need not apply. Go renew your Oprah subscription.

5. Keep it semi-simple. Make it catchy. Make it simple enough to bellow on F Street in a drunken stupor.

6. Send as many entries as you want. Send your entry to me here. Contest ends after the first round. The winner will be notified via email. The fight song will be published on this blog with the winner's consent. This should get you started:

"The Psychology of the Fan" Essay Contest

turnituptoeleven — Tue, 09 Dec 2008 19:01:44 -0000

If you asked me why I've been a rabid Caps fan for so long, I probably wouldn't be able to provide a logical answer.

Is there a reason that someone can shell out cash to watch grown men play a game -- a game over which the same fan has absolutely zero control? Is there a tenable defense for the sanity of fans who loyally support their team through bottom of the table finishes? Is fan-hood about the game or about the team? How did you become a fan, and why are you still a fan? What is your favorite memory as a fan? If your favorite club was wiped off the face of the Earth, would you find another to root for, or would you call it quits forever?

Responses should include insight on some of the above questions and be fewer than 500 words. Get them to me by 12/27. The winner will be notified the night/very early morning before the game via email. I'm not limiting "fan-hood" to only the Caps. If you're a diehard Real Madrid or Boston College fan and want to talk about that, be my guest.

Send your responses to:
theteamshrink at gmail dot com

**If you're the person who can make sense of it all, I have two 100 level centre ice suite tickets for the 12/28 Leafs game/Mike Gartner sweater retirement.**

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