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Your College Stadium: Now With More Creepy

I thought Texas A&M and Georgia's canine mascot mausoleums were creepy. A new piece of legislation working its way through the Florida House would allow the University of Florida to sell slots in a "columbarium," a memorial of sorts that through special exemption would be allowed to function on campus. ↵

↵This allows for you to literally spend eternity on campus, and possibly inside the stadium itself. Not that the lack of this formal endorsement of the practice hasn't prevented people from sowing their ashes all over the field anyway, according to Kate Marquis, University of Florida Alumni Association Director of Membership and Marketing, who says the demand is brisk. ↵

↵⇥"We feel like it would be meeting a need. I can't tell you how many people call." ↵
↵Virginia and Notre Dame already have variations on this scheme, and say they've sold on-campus grave sites at a good pace and could sell more in the future. As a Florida grad, the idea saddens me, especially since I'll be spending all of eternity with my Lord and Savior Tim Tebow, and don't really care what happens to my body. Wasting money so I can be entombed in a structure likely to be hurled on by a heat-stricken and drunk freshman during a blowout of the Citadel just seems so ... wait, I'm wrong. That sounds exactly like where I would end up spending the afterlife, actually. Sign me up and put me down for three. I hate having neighbors.↵

This post originally appeared on the Sporting Blog. For more, see The Sporting Blog Archives.