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I'm Pretty Sure The Opening Ceremony Musical Was Written By A 5-Year-Old

Hear me out here. I've been trying to follow the plot of this musical (or whatever it is), and the only conclusion I can reach is that the story of this musical was written by an overly imaginative five-year-old. Look:

Olympic Stuff
By Brandon, age 5

Once upon a time there was a fish kind of thing, but it had a cat or something on its butt.


Then a bunch of fish swam around.


And then the water turned into ice and an old weird guy had a stick. He hit the ground with his stick and there were lights and people dancing around.


But, suddenly!!!!!! There was a giant bear, and then the ice broke up (because there was a giant bear).


But it was okay, because then the people were on a birthday cake and then they started flying around.


And then Batman played the violin on a canoe that was flying around in the air.




More: SB Nation's full coverage of the Winter Olympics