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Thoughts On Hanley Ramirez's First Round In The 2010 Home Run Derby

  • Will Ferrell joins the broadcast booth. It's 6:10 and this is officially no longer about baseball. This is like the Deadspin of sporting events.
  • Music playing over the PA while Hanley takes his hacks: Walk It Out. Get it? He's lazy! David Eckstein would take his hacks to Run It.
  • Five homers and three outs for Hanley so far, as he's hit the ball deep everywhere. It's like he was saving up all his strength just for this. Which I bet he did, because in the Home Run Derby the spotlight is on the individual player, and Hanley is all about himself over his team. Because he's lazy and selfish! I hear Hanley Ramirez invented direct deposit.
  • Chris Berman asks for Will Ferrell's impression of Harry Caray. Ferrell complies. This broadcast is as Now as Chris Berman.
  • Chris Berman expresses shock and awe at every single home run. He's either a child, limited by a terrible short-term memory, or he's the world's most convincing liar. WOW! A HOME RUN! HE HIT THAT BALL TO POUGHKEEPSIE!
  • Ferrell ends his set by saying "and nobody knows this, but Hanley Ramirez is 47 years old." Always leave your audience with something unfunny and nonsensical.