Golf is not cool, which is really just another way of saying that no sport on earth benefits more from the Nike commercial treatment, where just about anything in the world can look cool for at least 60 seconds. EXHIBIT A:
Other scenes that Rory McIlroy and Tiger Woods should interrupt with wayward teeshots: United States Congress, a dramatic showdown between Taylor Swift and a boyfriend, Kim Jong-un touring a North Korean nuclear testing facility, Phill Simms' face in the CBS broadcast booth, any Anne Hathaway acceptance speech, and then maybe a Lakers game, where thousands of golf balls would come raining down from the rafters to put everyone out of their misery. Because if we're gonna live in this Nike-sponsored alternate universe where golf is fun to watch, we may as well take it to the next level and have Nike make golf the coolest sport on earth. WATCH YOUR BACK, PHIL SIMMS.