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RUSSIA
Wiedmann [11:28 PM]:
Gotta love the veiled “hope there’s no terrorist attack” sign-off.
Clay Wendler [11:24 PM]:
Clay Wendler [11:19 PM]:
Izzy Grinspan [11:18 PM]:
@Spencer Hall My favorite part was definitely the part where sports happened.
Spencer Hall [11:17 PM]:
Well, that was…sports? Sports!
ponebrewed [11:15 PM]:
@cwdarney it’s the motto of the state brothels
ponebrewed [11:14 PM]:
@Izzy Grinspan No its the moto of Putin’s state sponsered Brothels
Caroline Darney [11:14 PM]:
Ok those fireworks are on point.
Mason Dixon [11:14 PM]:
Lighting the torch to Firebird. I see what you did there, Russia.
Justin Cohen [11:14 PM]:
ok that’s it. Goodnight. Hockey at 3am. Your late local news is next!
icorriher [11:13 PM]:
Rulon should have tackled him and lit the torch
Izzy Grinspan [11:13 PM]:
And there’s the money shot.
Caroline Darney [11:13 PM]:
Is “hot. cool. yours” the actual motto? It was outside the stadium…
Spencer Hall [11:13 PM]:
The Putin Penis is lit.
David Statman [11:13 PM]:
Tretiak just never stops running, defects
chaimy4life [11:12 PM]:
Peter Stormare’s character from ‘Armageddon’ should have lit the torch.
Clay Wendler [11:12 PM]:
Spencer Hall [11:12 PM]:
They cut the twenty mile run to the torch out of the original broadcast. Probably a good call.
Justin Cohen [11:12 PM]:
@David Statman Russian and American hero!
David Statman [11:11 PM]:
How’s that silver taste, Tretiak?
David Statman [11:09 PM]:
Karelin! RULON GARDNER’S BETTER THAN YOU
Spencer Hall [11:09 PM]:
KARELIN
Justin Cohen [11:08 PM]:
sorry, Russia. Sherapova’s ours
Clay Wendler [11:08 PM]:
Justin Cohen [11:07 PM]:
do they do the same ceremony for the Parolympics?
Spencer Hall [11:06 PM]:
The lighting of Putin’s proxy penis is pretty spectacular, though.
Jim Buzinski [11:04 PM]:
Can we watch the athletes march out in reverse order? that would be more interesting than this.
Spencer Hall [11:02 PM]:
Layering the Tron soundtrack over opera. RUSSIAN THINGS.
Matt Ufford [11:02 PM]:
Weird, it doesn’t SOUND like Pink Floyd.
Clay Wendler [11:01 PM]:
DAFT PUNK OMG
Matt Ufford [11:01 PM]:
I’ve seen more interesting PBS specials.
David Statman [11:01 PM]:
I was promised Stoner Bear.
Justin Cohen [11:00 PM]:
If I ran the Olympics, I’d have the Parade of Nations, bring the torch in, and call it a day
JoshCVT [10:59 PM]:
Glad to see Russia kept Rollerblade in business for another year.
Spencer Hall [10:59 PM]:
Sure, Russia, invoking the image of the atom is a great association for you.
Spencer Hall [10:56 PM]:
@Clay Wendler or fighting off yet another attempted poisoning
Clay Wendler [10:56 PM]:
i saw putin swallow, i think he was getting choked up
Matt Ufford [10:56 PM]:
I like this lady. Opera singer by night, Olympic lifter by day.
Justin Cohen [10:53 PM]:
she might break Sochi
Spencer Hall [10:53 PM]:
“I dunno about this part of the program. Some opera? Sure, let’s put some opera in here.”
Clay Wendler [10:53 PM]:
russia has filled it’s overbearing majesty quotient for the evening
Brad Masson [10:51 PM]:
WHERES STONER BEAR?!?!? I DEMAND STONER BEAR
Justin Cohen [10:50 PM]:
Pavel Bure got snubbed?
Spencer Hall [10:49 PM]:
I’m not going to make fun of these games with hate in my heart. Atlanta got a Games. Anyone can do it.
Clay Wendler [10:49 PM]:
Matt Ufford [10:47 PM]:
“beautifully choreographed” — Meredith Vieira on people spinning in circles
Justin Cohen [10:47 PM]:
Man if only they had shown this live online this morning. I’d be in bed now
toonces_no [10:46 PM]:
LIGHT SPEEEEEEED
Matt Ufford [10:43 PM]:
Tchaikovsky, yeah? That’s another drink.
Clay Wendler [10:43 PM]:
Clay Wendler [10:43 PM]:
got our SBN man on the scene
David Statman [10:43 PM]:
that’s one bomb ass jellyfish
Travis Hughes [10:42 PM]:
@Izzy Grinspan i mean, that’s why i’m still watching
Izzy Grinspan [10:42 PM]:
This is the part where Putin takes off his shirt and wrestles a bear, right?
ponebrewed [10:41 PM]:
At this point I just want them to reenact all of Brothers Karamazov in less than 3 minutes
Matt Ufford [10:41 PM]:
“Please try to respect different viewpoints, even if the host country doesn’t!”
Justin Cohen [10:39 PM]:
but don’t stop working, workers!
Spencer Hall [10:39 PM]:
@ximiankernel that’s implied
David Statman [10:38 PM]:
@mattufford Give me the hair George Michael I NEED THE HAIR
chaimy4life [10:38 PM]:
@mattufford How do you say ‘No Touching!’ in Russian?
ximiankernel [10:38 PM]:
Russian language really sound like they are threatening to punch you in the kidneys
chaimy4life [10:37 PM]:
@David Statman That commercial holds up, too.
Matt Ufford [10:37 PM]:
Great work, Young Russian Jeffrey Tambor!
ncquake24 [10:37 PM]:
Did he just say the hate in our hearts?
chaimy4life [10:37 PM]:
@Clay Wendler Is that supposed to look like Hillary Clinton?
Clay Wendler [10:36 PM]:
Justin Cohen [10:36 PM]:
I wonder what this guy is really saying. Hateful things?
David Statman [10:34 PM]:
I haven’t seen that sip stealing commercial since like 2007. NBC bringing out all the stops
Justin Cohen [10:34 PM]:
@Wiedmann or Cuba..
ximiankernel [10:34 PM]:
no Stalin era? no WWII? no Gorbachev era? their history retelling has so much holes than a ……..?
Wiedmann [10:33 PM]:
@David Statman Go to Georgia or Armenia…it’s basically the same.
toonces_no [10:32 PM]:
That little girl is fearless. If i was on Russian-made ropes that high, I would be peeing myself silly.
Justin Cohen [10:32 PM]:
Meredith does know the 20th Century ended 14 years ago right?
Chris Pendley [10:31 PM]:
Putin just wants you to get down. You know, put on a nice record and get some wine, maybe some candles.
ximiankernel [10:31 PM]:
is this the part where because of radiation, women all gave birth to twins?
toonces_no [10:30 PM]:
@Spencer Hall Dammit I was just writing that.
David Statman [10:30 PM]:
Man, the Soviet Union seemed like a wonderful place. I want to go to there
Justin Cohen [10:30 PM]:
where is Queen Letifa…also nice use of Trololo
Spencer Hall [10:30 PM]:
And there’s the trolololo song.
Spencer Hall [10:29 PM]:
DRAGO
Izzy Grinspan [10:28 PM]:
This is the part of Russian history that looked like Grease, apparently.
David Statman [10:28 PM]:
I TOLD HER TO TWERK SOMETHING
Wiedmann [10:28 PM]:
Lada’s are fucking sweet. I hitchhiked in a lot of those in Eastern Europe
Matt Ufford [10:28 PM]:
Potemkin cars!
toonces_no [10:27 PM]:
James Bond is going to pop in at any moment
Caroline Darney [10:26 PM]:
I wonder how hard it is to choreograph a dance that signifies WWII
Izzy Grinspan [10:26 PM]:
@Jim Buzinski Any time.
Jim Buzinski [10:26 PM]:
thanks izzy, this tweet is getting nice play:
“What’s gay about a marching phalanx of hot guys in lavender suits?” Absolutely nothing. #OpeningCeremony pic.twitter.com/pDpZyDJlhA
— Outsports (@outsports) February 8, 2014
Chris Pendley [10:26 PM]:
TSN is really confused as to why this entire ceremony wasn’t devoted to the Summit Series.
David Statman [10:26 PM]:
MEET ME AT THA CROSSROADS
Spencer Hall [10:25 PM]:
This is the Simpson’s gay steel mill
Justin Cohen [10:25 PM]:
oh hey, the workers are here to finish building the stadium!
chaimy4life [10:24 PM]:
@Clay Wendler That looks like Tony Kornheiser’s penguin dance.
Clay Wendler [10:24 PM]:
now a ufo should land
ncquake24 [10:24 PM]:
@David Statman during the Men’s Hockey Finals
David Statman [10:24 PM]:
@Clay Wendler STR8 BERNIE
Clay Wendler [10:23 PM]:
Spencer Hall [10:23 PM]:
Krokodil is no laughing matter.
David Statman [10:23 PM]:
when are they gonna re-enact the Miracle on Ice
Chris Pendley [10:17 PM]:
that last sequence combined two of Russia’s favorite pastimes: ballet and recreational drug use gone horribly awry by surroundings.
Wiedmann [10:17 PM]:
Communism, brought to you by Capitalism.
Rush Roberts [10:17 PM]:
Imperialism in Russia is about to be swept away by JIMMY FALLON GETTING HIS OWN SHOW
Travis Hughes [10:16 PM]:
“Imperialism about to be swept away by …. this commercial break!”
Travis Hughes [10:16 PM]:
solid segue there, Lauer
Rush Roberts [10:16 PM]:
wait are you telling me ballet originated in Russia
Matthew Tennant [10:16 PM]:
Rave at the Ballet
Clay Wendler [10:15 PM]:
oh god this is terrifying
The Goche [10:15 PM]:
@Chris Pendley The part of the show where they reenact the MLK assassination will be very tastefully done.
Justin Cohen [10:14 PM]:
@ncquake24 if you were wondering who designed the costumes, let us remind you that you are watching the opening of a sporting event.
ncquake24 [10:13 PM]:
@Justin Cohen even if we were, we could just google it.
Spencer Hall [10:13 PM]:
It’s Russia. You have to have some ballet.
Justin Cohen [10:12 PM]:
no Meredith, we were not wondering who designed the costumes. Thanks though
Clay Wendler [10:12 PM]:
i bet putin hates this part
David Statman [10:11 PM]:
am I watching Man in the Iron Mask?
icorriher [10:10 PM]:
I would have had Napolean ride in on a horse and freeze to death
Clay Wendler [10:10 PM]:
Matthew Tennant [10:09 PM]:
Their lines weren’t even straight. Come on guys, dress down!
Chris Pendley [10:09 PM]:
@Spencer Hall they’d be at the Liberty Bowl, because fuck it, we already got a damn building might as well use it right?
Rush Roberts [10:09 PM]:
@David Statman Several dozen children will re-enact the movie “The Firm” to Lyle Lovett’s “I’ve Been to Memphis”
Jim Buzinski [10:09 PM]:
@Izzy Grinspan “What’s gay about a marching phalanx of hot guys in lavander suits?” Absolutely nothing. 
Justin Cohen [10:08 PM]:
@David Statman with 500,000 Elvises marching
David Statman [10:07 PM]:
@Chris Pendley It’s just gonna be Zach Randolph doing laps on an ATV for 2 hours
Izzy Grinspan [10:07 PM]:
@Jim Buzinski What’s gay about a marching phalanx of hot guys in lavander suits?
Mason Dixon [10:07 PM]:
pantomime drummers play matched grip, apparently
Spencer Hall [10:07 PM]:
@Chris Pendley YESSSSS
Jim Buzinski [10:07 PM]:
this is gayer than west hollywood on saturday night
David Statman [10:06 PM]:
This is insanely delightful
Chris Pendley [10:06 PM]:
Now I’m curious as to what the Opening Ceremonies will look like in Memphis come 2024.
Jim Buzinski [10:06 PM]:
here come the hot dancers
Spencer Hall [10:06 PM]:
@David Statman Yessir!
David Statman [10:05 PM]:
@Spencer Hall Is that seriously a true story? That is amazing.
Mason Dixon [10:05 PM]:
captain strolling hard dot gif
Spencer Hall [10:04 PM]:
They might leave the part about Peter the Great ruining a London hotel by greasing up the hallways and throwing prostitutes down it like they were bowling balls.
David Statman [10:04 PM]:
OH SHIT IT’S PAUL REVERE
Clay Wendler [10:03 PM]:
Cyd Zeigler [10:03 PM]:
OK all I gotta head out very shortly. Gotta go watch the West Coast feed. I hope it’s better than the East Coast feed. http://www.outsports.com/2014/2/4/5376398/olympic-opening-ceremony-pride-house-uprising-of-love
Martin Rickman [10:02 PM]:
quarles got a cadillac commercial!
tmoseley20 [10:01 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler As a Jags fan I loved that game!
Spencer Hall [10:00 PM]:
Ergot poisoning was an influential part of Russian history.
Cyd Zeigler [10:00 PM]:
This is like watching the Browns play the Jaguars.
Mason Dixon [9:59 PM]:
This will be a future Nicki Minaj video
ponebrewed [9:59 PM]:
@Clay Wendler Is it just me or do some of those look like exotic sex toys
Hambone179 [9:58 PM]:
Is that Putin’s used condom?
toonces_no [9:57 PM]:
Cyd Zeigler [9:57 PM]:
“We represent the lollipop guild…”
Clay Wendler [9:57 PM]:
Rush Roberts [9:57 PM]:
@toonces_no advertising: https://twitter.com/blumby09/status/431964185585414144
Mason Dixon [9:57 PM]:
Putting the rim in Rimsky-Korsakov?
Cyd Zeigler [9:56 PM]:
“Candyland version of Russian architecture” – NBC’s line of the night.
toonces_no [9:55 PM]:
it looks kind of like a butthole
Wiedmann [9:55 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler No, but it is supposed to
Hambone179 [9:55 PM]:
One ring torule them all!
Spencer Hall [9:55 PM]:
They actually cover Communism and the Revolution—let’s see if NBC edits that out.
Justin Cohen [9:54 PM]:
There’s the other ring!
Clay Wendler [9:54 PM]:
@Chris Pendley chekov joke
Cyd Zeigler [9:54 PM]:
Is this ring going to open too?
Jim Buzinski [9:54 PM]:
@Justin Cohen famine and mass killing isn’t very family-friendly
toonces_no [9:54 PM]:
Best part of these opening ceremonies was that matt lauer got to explain to me what yolo means
David Statman [9:54 PM]:
nice of you guys to leave out all the ethnic cleansing
Chris Pendley [9:54 PM]:
hey wait those helicopters just went to warp speed RUSSIA HAS WARP DRIVE TECHNOLOGY
Cyd Zeigler [9:54 PM]:
So Sochi is essential Hobbiton?
Spencer Hall [9:54 PM]:
They skipped the giant bears
Justin Cohen [9:54 PM]:
ok they totally skipped 1922-1991. I’m kind of surprised.
chaimy4life [9:53 PM]:
No bread lines in this video? #USA #USA #USA
David Statman [9:53 PM]:
googles IT TOTALLY WAS. BEARDED FEDOR
David Statman [9:52 PM]:
SHIT WAIT IS THAT FEDOR WITH A BEARD?
David Statman [9:52 PM]:
AW YEAH WORK THAT WOOD
Justin Cohen [9:51 PM]:
1000 years of history in 3 minutes. Of course 2 of those minutes devoted to 1922-1991
Izzy Grinspan [9:51 PM]:
This just got SO MUCH BETTER.
JoshCVT [9:51 PM]:
@Chris Pendley #SashaCares
Cyd Zeigler [9:51 PM]:
@Travis Hughes I have a West Hollywood full of rainbow shots waiting for me. Stalin had better be the one to light the damn flame…
Cyd Zeigler [9:50 PM]:
That’s three Morgan Freeman shots.
Jim Buzinski [9:50 PM]:
this still has 90 minutes to go. they brought the athletes in earlier than in other olympics
Jim Buzinski [9:48 PM]:
https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Bf61zhdCQAATg-n.jpg:large
Travis Hughes [9:48 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler torch lighting!
Matthew Tennant [9:48 PM]:
Missed opportunity here by not having Putin ride out on a bear shirtless.
Chris Pendley [9:48 PM]:
No word if Alexander Semin showed up for the opening ceremonies, but hey, enigmatic. This update has been brought to you by TSN.
Cyd Zeigler [9:48 PM]:
OK, are we done?
Matt Ufford [9:47 PM]:
You never go full Santa.
David Statman [9:47 PM]:
Seriously though why does Russia get their own entrance music
ximiankernel [9:47 PM]:
what will be make this awesome is if Putin leads the Russian’s entry riding a polar bear
Hambone179 [9:47 PM]:
Russia= Santa army!
Cyd Zeigler [9:47 PM]:
One of the Russian ski jumpers is about to smile. Wait for it…. ah, false alarm.
David Statman [9:47 PM]:
PUTIN RHYTHMIC CLAPPING WE ARE BEYOND THE PALE
Clay Wendler [9:47 PM]:
Matt Ufford [9:46 PM]:
Russia enters to Russian version of Jay-Z
Cyd Zeigler [9:46 PM]:
Be great if NBC just cut to commercial for the Russians.
toonces_no [9:46 PM]:
That’s the most emotion Putin has ever shown.
ROFLCOPTER16 [9:46 PM]:
@David Statman SUPER SAIYAN 4
Spencer Hall [9:46 PM]:
DAFT PUNK!
David Statman [9:45 PM]:
— Horton Atonto (@crushingbort) February 8, 2014
Cyd Zeigler [9:45 PM]:
I do love Cool Runnings.
Matt Ufford [9:44 PM]:
@tmoseley20 into a triple jump: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5mVVy25e-vk
Justin Cohen [9:44 PM]:
the moment we’ve been waiting for: Jamaica!
David Statman [9:44 PM]:
FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME, GET ON UP IT’S BOBSLED TIME
Jim Buzinski [9:44 PM]:
Sweden, Estonia … the Baltics bring home the hotness
toonces_no [9:44 PM]:
Sanka is walking in
Caroline Darney [9:44 PM]:
THOSE SWEDISH PANTS, DOE
icorriher [9:44 PM]:
Sweden with all of the blondes
chaimy4life [9:44 PM]:
Anyone upset the DJ never busted out the original Tetris music?
tmoseley20 [9:43 PM]:
@mattufford is there video of this?
David Statman [9:43 PM]:
Thanks Mat Lauer, I didn’t know what YOLO meant
Jim Buzinski [9:43 PM]:
Lucky guy:
I can’t believe I’m missing the #OpeningCeremony because I’m at OLIVE GARDEN!
— Saverio Colarusso (@SalColarusso) February 8, 2014
Cyd Zeigler [9:43 PM]:
The Russians have made vodka for hundreds of years just so the population could get through this ceremony.
Matthew Tennant [9:43 PM]:
YOLO Flip
toonces_no [9:43 PM]:
ok it’s switzerland. show us the ladies
Spencer Hall [9:43 PM]:
@toonces_no might want to check the tax implications of that
Caroline Darney [9:42 PM]:
I love that Czech Republic had suspenders on
Cyd Zeigler [9:42 PM]:
“Chile is after Tonga? The Russians can’t even alphabetize right” – Stupid-American comments
toonces_no [9:42 PM]:
@Spencer Hall Definitely bobsled for Bermuda.
David Statman [9:42 PM]:
even Russian house music is terrifying
Spencer Hall [9:42 PM]:
The Czech Republic done got themselves some East Tennessee Possum-skin hats
Spencer Hall [9:41 PM]:
@JoshCVT another solid choice
Matt Ufford [9:41 PM]:
Reminder: ice skating officials banned backflips because jumps are supposed to land on one skate, so Surya Bonaly landed a backflip ON ONE SKATE. And still got docked for it. Lesson: there is a badass French woman out there, and ice skating blows.
Cyd Zeigler [9:41 PM]:
Women’s college gymnastics is on the BYU channel right now. Choices, choices…
JoshCVT [9:41 PM]:
@Spencer Hall Ski jumping, USVI. It’s over quick.
Justin Cohen [9:41 PM]:
that’s what I would do
Justin Cohen [9:41 PM]:
Curling, Guam
Matthew Tennant [9:41 PM]:
@Spencer Hall Norway and Curling. THE PANTS!
David Statman [9:40 PM]:
Where the hell is CroCop
Chris Pendley [9:40 PM]:
@Spencer Hall biathalon, Cyprus.
Spencer Hall [9:39 PM]:
@mattufford so like,, Luge for Tuvalu
Spencer Hall [9:39 PM]:
@Dr. Norris Camacho that’s good bull right there
ItsScottieTime [9:38 PM]:
Change my name to Gunnar Stahl and play hockey for Iceland
Matt Ufford [9:37 PM]:
@Spencer Hall I’m repping any country where I’m the only athlete, in the event that’s over first. There is no better answer.
Cyd Zeigler [9:37 PM]:
This is like watching War & Peace
Rush Roberts [9:37 PM]:
@Spencer Hall Skeleton, Turks & Caicos
Spencer Hall [9:36 PM]:
@rlag09 then it’s “whatever ends first.”
Spencer Hall [9:36 PM]:
@David Statman solid choice
rlag09 [9:36 PM]:
@Spencer Hall whatever gives me the most amount of time to party in the Olympic village
Justin Cohen [9:36 PM]:
Putin claps in his sleep?
David Statman [9:36 PM]:
@Spencer Hall Luge looks fun/dangerous, I’m doing that and representing Greenland
Matt Ufford [9:36 PM]:
Putin. Drink.
Clay Wendler [9:35 PM]:
David Statman [9:34 PM]:
We have our first Metta World Peace reference!
ximiankernel [9:34 PM]:
palm trees and snow seemed a weird image
Izzy Grinspan [9:34 PM]:
Tonga’s coats make Germany’s coats look like everyone else’s coats.
Matt Ufford [9:34 PM]:
Winter Olympians are goddamn beautiful people, man.
Spencer Hall [9:34 PM]:
OKAY: You get to cheat and compete in one event as an expat American with double status. What event do you choose?
David Statman [9:34 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler island nation near Indonesia
Jim Buzinski [9:34 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler Who cares? The guys looked hot.
Cyd Zeigler [9:33 PM]:
Timor-leste? WTF is that?
Cyd Zeigler [9:33 PM]:
Taiwan raided a hospital closet.
David Statman [9:33 PM]:
OH SHIT DAT HAIRCUT
Travis Hughes [9:33 PM]:
@David Statman nope! Cyrillic ABC’s, they’re at the end
David Statman [9:32 PM]:
dammit did I miss Jamaica?
IsItFallYet? [9:32 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler maybe if you wait a few years they’ll turn it into a musical on ice, and then you’ll know for sure
Clay Wendler [9:32 PM]:
ximiankernel [9:32 PM]:
oh i forgotten it is not live.. my mistake
Cyd Zeigler [9:32 PM]:
Where’s the Canadian luge ad when you need it?
Travis Hughes [9:32 PM]:
Women’s ski jumping is in the Olympics for the first time this year. Why the delay? They didn’t want uteri falling out (seriously) http://www.sbnation.com/2014/2/6/5377884/sochi-2014-ski-jumping-rules-scoring-format-winter-olympics
Spencer Hall [9:30 PM]:
True story: a Norwegian military officer invented ski jumping on a dare.
ximiankernel [9:30 PM]:
Tajikistan and thai viewers from the US pissed for their athletes being skipped over
Cyd Zeigler [9:30 PM]:
Do I want to see this Maleficent movie because I’m gay? Or am I gay because I want to see this Maleficent movie?
Cyd Zeigler [9:30 PM]:
Why is ski jumping an Olympic sport for anyone? Are they going to add NASCAR to the Summer Games?
Rush Roberts [9:29 PM]:
We need to find out who the mustache guy was. 
Travis Hughes [9:29 PM]:
RT @SBNOlympics: Damn right you’re an Olympian, Heidi. http://t.co/SzlRjXXI3X pic.twitter.com/LodOiAoPlX pic.twitter.com/ndALR7T5rC
— SB Nation (@sbnation) February 8, 2014
toonces_no [9:29 PM]:
USA #1
IsItFallYet? [9:29 PM]:
wtf, weed gets legalized in colorado and shaun white shaves? what kind of bizarro universe is this
The Goche [9:29 PM]:
Can’t believe we didn’t wear Cold War Championship Belts.
Cyd Zeigler [9:29 PM]:
So NBC just stays on the US delegation acting fools while other countries march in? Oy.
icorriher [9:28 PM]:
Disappointed we didn’t get booed. We should go full heel for this.
Justin Cohen [9:28 PM]:
wait I thought we already say Team USA…Dominica, Peru, Virgin Islands right?
ximiankernel [9:28 PM]:
hey theey will be a hit on future Ugly Christmas sweater parties
IsItFallYet? [9:28 PM]:
bets $1000 on gracie gold
Cyd Zeigler [9:28 PM]:
They need a streaker right about … now …
David Statman [9:27 PM]:
dammit, why does crutches girl have to be so damn cute, now I feel terrible for her
Caroline Darney [9:27 PM]:
That sucks. Fall the first event before the opener. :(
Wiedmann [9:27 PM]:
@cwdarney Too late, already pulled one for her
Rush Roberts [9:27 PM]:
where is coach Cliff Huxtable?
Caroline Darney [9:26 PM]:
Ummm…ok don’t pull for the chick on crutches.
Clay Wendler [9:26 PM]:
IsItFallYet? [9:26 PM]:
did grandma knit our uniforms?
Hambone179 [9:26 PM]:
US team went to Ragstock
Cyd Zeigler [9:26 PM]:
Jim, I think we should contact Todd Lodwick tomorrow…
David Statman [9:25 PM]:
USA! USA! USA!
Jim Buzinski [9:25 PM]:
USA uniforms: Patrioitic vomit.
Cyd Zeigler [9:25 PM]:
I hope they boo the US. That would be awesome.
chaimy4life [9:25 PM]:
Koman Coulibali leads out Slovenia… #NEVERFORGET
Izzy Grinspan [9:25 PM]:
SWEATER TIME
Jim Buzinski [9:25 PM]:
Slovenia, home to one of the seven openly lesbian athletes.
IsItFallYet? [9:25 PM]:
soooo many countries. bring on the orwellian future of three or four super-states
Izzy Grinspan [9:25 PM]:
Slovenia with the jaunty single green sleeve
Travis Hughes [9:24 PM]:
Zdeno Chara and a bunch of children, apparently
David Statman [9:24 PM]:
Chara’s the ugliest dude at the Olympics
JoshCVT [9:24 PM]:
THE LARGEST IN CAPTIVITY
Jim Buzinski [9:24 PM]:
Love those serbian scarves: 
Hambone179 [9:23 PM]:
San Marino? Dan marino!
Chris Pendley [9:23 PM]:
San Marino: ground zero for the death of print media.
Cyd Zeigler [9:23 PM]:
San Marino? What, Vatican City couldn’t make it?
David Statman [9:23 PM]:
those people have seriously been dancing nonstop the whole time, likely at gunpoint
Cyd Zeigler [9:22 PM]:
Ryan Seacrest? Guuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrllll…
David Statman [9:22 PM]:
where is Best Korea
JoshCVT [9:22 PM]:
If I qualified to compete for some other country and the US wasn’t interested, I’d go and I wouldn’t even blink. Would you pass on being an Olympian? Bullshit.
Cyd Zeigler [9:22 PM]:
How is it that nobody is carrying a Starbucks cup?
Wiedmann [9:22 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler Well, they have a little less competition there.
IsItFallYet? [9:21 PM]:
“an ecommerce consultant” — sounds like a sweet gig
Jim Buzinski [9:21 PM]:
Poland, my motherland!
ximiankernel [9:21 PM]:
in 2010
Izzy Grinspan [9:21 PM]:
That fur coat looks like it should belong to Jon Snow.
ximiankernel [9:20 PM]:
true story: I waiting my turn on a Vancouver starbucks when I suddenly felt claustrophobic.. when I looked behind me, there were 4 Norwegian athletes towering over me
Travis Hughes [9:20 PM]:
@Wiedmann don’t worry: http://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2014/1/21/5332140/best-dressed-at-the-winter-oympics-the-norweigan-curling-team
Cyd Zeigler [9:20 PM]:
Stop with the Americans competing for South and Central American countries! This is stupid.
Justin Cohen [9:20 PM]:
How many Americans compete for other nations? Traitors!
Jim Buzinski [9:20 PM]:
Pakistan guy wearing a Raiders hat
Clay Wendler [9:20 PM]:
Wiedmann [9:19 PM]:
NOOOOOO, WHERE ARE THE CURLING PANTS?
Spencer Hall [9:19 PM]:
STOP BEING IMPOSSIBLY BEAUTIFUL, SCANDINAVIANS
toonces_no [9:19 PM]:
hello norway
David Statman [9:19 PM]:
goddammit why is everyone so good-looking
Cyd Zeigler [9:19 PM]:
Was that Shaun White circa 2006 marching for NZ?
IsItFallYet? [9:19 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler cheers to that
Clay Wendler [9:18 PM]:
lovely fur
Matt Ufford [9:18 PM]:
Shut up YOU’RE misty at the Tide commercial!
Cyd Zeigler [9:18 PM]:
How do we start a petition to get Jimmy Fallon and Tina Fey as the 2016 Opening Ceremony announcers?
Rodger Sherman [9:18 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler ionno, this is arguably my favorite part of the Olympics, possibly. Maybe it’s because I spent too much time looking at maps as a kid
Jim Buzinski [9:17 PM]:
Chevy has 2 ads with gay couples in them. Have they aired yet?
Martin Rickman [9:17 PM]:
@Clay Wendler clay you are a beautiful human being
Cyd Zeigler [9:17 PM]:
Ummm…have you had a chicken nugget?
IsItFallYet? [9:16 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler Is Jonathon Martin in it?
Caroline Darney [9:16 PM]:
I think the worst Olympics commercial this time around has to be the one where McDonalds compares biting an Olympic medal to eating a chicken nugget. Yeah. Seems comparable.
Cyd Zeigler [9:16 PM]:
Did Coke intentionally put a bunch of closeted athletes in their ad? Just sayin.
Spencer Hall [9:16 PM]:
I think the rule is that Mexico is constantly wiling out, all the time.
ximiankernel [9:16 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler known as the Closing Ceremonies
Clay Wendler [9:16 PM]:
IsItFallYet? [9:15 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler … and fight off packs of stray dogs. LET THE GAMES BEGIN
Cyd Zeigler [9:15 PM]:
#PatriotWay
Cyd Zeigler [9:15 PM]:
No drinking game can save these opening ceremonies. They should just can the stupid parade of nations, just have everyone walk in together.
Matthew Tennant [9:14 PM]:
Nick Pants wins the Internet:
— nick pants (@nick_pants) February 8, 2014
David Statman [9:14 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler I always a appreciate a good Oregon State reference
Rodger Sherman [9:14 PM]:
about the mexican guy: http://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2014/1/27/5350282/prince-hubertus-mexico-sochi-olympics-mariachi-ski-suit
IsItFallYet? [9:14 PM]:
A brick layer? If the Olympics don’t work out, I hear the Pistons are hiring
Rodger Sherman [9:13 PM]:
also, yo, matt lauer stole our joke
Cyd Zeigler [9:13 PM]:
Mr. Peabody & Sherman. I quit.
Cyd Zeigler [9:13 PM]:
And Oregon State joins the parade…
Travis Hughes [9:13 PM]:
Here’s the whole deal with those independent Indian athletes, if you’re wondering: http://www.sbnation.com/2014/2/7/5390076/independent-olympic-athletes-india-winter-olympics-2014-opening-ceremony
Rodger Sherman [9:13 PM]:
Rodger Sherman [9:13 PM]:
indian luger already had a preposterous crash AND GOT BACK ON HIS SLED
JoshCVT [9:12 PM]:
Turn the ski-jump event upside down and Nepal’s guy will be right back in this thing.
Jim Buzinski [9:12 PM]:
Some Dutch treats!
Spencer Hall [9:12 PM]:
That man lives in a village four hours away from a road and is a bricklayer and a cross-country skiier. HE’S BULLETPROOF.
Caroline Darney [9:12 PM]:
Hey Negative Lauer, lay off the dude. “He’s going to get last”. #cinderellastory
David Statman [9:12 PM]:
Oh hell yeah we have a Sherpa in the Games
Wiedmann [9:12 PM]:
I like the honesty, Nepal
Jim Buzinski [9:12 PM]:
I like the independent athletes. India is so screwed up the IOC yanked their credential this year and their athletes have to march under that
IsItFallYet? [9:11 PM]:
Olympic orphans, wtf
Rush Roberts [9:11 PM]:
@Spencer Hall http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PvWYQi5Abi0
David Statman [9:11 PM]:
BOLD BYAMBADORJ
Rush Roberts [9:10 PM]:
The Monaco skiier is Kliff Kingsbury’s cousin
Spencer Hall [9:10 PM]:
I can’t breathe I’m laughing so hard at ANDY HIMALAYA
Wiedmann [9:10 PM]:
S NOT HOW YOU SAY IT
Caroline Darney [9:10 PM]:
Ok Mexico, those are sassy. Moldova could use their country name on their outfits more.
Wiedmann [9:10 PM]:
Moldava? NO, THAT’
ximiankernel [9:09 PM]:
Mexico’s jacket reminds me of Tron
Cyd Zeigler [9:09 PM]:
Well there are your Tron unis
Matthew Tennant [9:09 PM]:
The most interesting man in the world.
IsItFallYet? [9:09 PM]:
This music…
David Statman [9:09 PM]:
MEXICO TURN UP
Jim Buzinski [9:09 PM]:
@cwdarney It is a hottie festival, whatever your orientation!
Rush Roberts [9:09 PM]:
@IsItFallYet? The American Idol panel
Spencer Hall [9:09 PM]:
GET IT, MEXICO
chaimy4life [9:09 PM]:
Morocco really needs to make that star a pentagram \m/
toonces_no [9:09 PM]:
@Cowboycane Hopefully it was just the music and it wasn’t actually built by russians
David Statman [9:09 PM]:
I really hope her nickname is “The Maltese Falcon”
IsItFallYet? [9:08 PM]:
who decides who gets to participate in this for the american team?
Caroline Darney [9:08 PM]:
They should really just call this the attractive athlete parade instead of the Parade of Nations.
Cowboycane [9:08 PM]:
I stayed in a hotel in Vegas that used this soundtrack in its elevators
toonces_no [9:08 PM]:
sponsored by zubaz
Cyd Zeigler [9:08 PM]:
They picked that up at Kmart.
Rush Roberts [9:08 PM]:
Lichtenstein with the 1991 Starter jacket throwbacks
Wiedmann [9:07 PM]:
Liechtenstein just got back from a paintball tournament, apparently
Cyd Zeigler [9:07 PM]:
OK, LIechenstein has the worst unis so far.
IsItFallYet? [9:07 PM]:
Armchair geopolitics with NBC
Matthew Tennant [9:07 PM]:
Lithuania overdid the highlighter. And I’m a Baylor fan.
Cyd Zeigler [9:07 PM]:
They’re like a pack of juicy fruit
David Statman [9:07 PM]:
The Lithuania Fighting Irish
IsItFallYet? [9:07 PM]:
so is that the entire Olympic team from lebanon?
Caroline Darney [9:07 PM]:
…and Lithuania sponsored by high lighters.
Cyd Zeigler [9:07 PM]:
“Follow the Yellow brick road” to Lithuania
Wiedmann [9:07 PM]:
Lithuania will get your Lucky Charms
GO_Athletes [9:07 PM]:
kermit the frog
Justin Cohen [9:07 PM]:
They’re after Lithuania’s Lucky Charms?
toonces_no [9:07 PM]:
holy green jackets
Cyd Zeigler [9:06 PM]:
Totes brah
Wiedmann [9:06 PM]:
Man, the Baltic countries sure have hot chicks
Clay Wendler [9:06 PM]:
latvia are browns fans
Justin Cohen [9:06 PM]:
Sandis Ozolins still plays hockey? Latvia still has an Olympic hockey team?
Spencer Hall [9:06 PM]:
Latvia just wearing some old Wyoming football jerseys
Matthew Tennant [9:06 PM]:
Latvia just pulled their uniforms out of the 70’s.
Caroline Darney [9:06 PM]:
Latvia: the Cleveland Browns of the uniform world.
Cyd Zeigler [9:06 PM]:
And now, the Cleveland Browns!
IsItFallYet? [9:05 PM]:
What would Brian Boitano do, if he were here today?
Izzy Grinspan [9:05 PM]:
Kyrgyzstan really knows how to accessorize.
Clay Wendler [9:05 PM]:
Jason Kirk [9:04 PM]:
KYRGYZSTAN BOATHATS
Cyd Zeigler [9:04 PM]:
Kirjgksstkshsldhasslkdshdsglhgaksstan!
Caroline Darney [9:04 PM]:
Kyrgyzstan. Best hats. Hands down.
Matthew Tennant [9:04 PM]:
Every single Canadian was smiling. #Stereotypes
ximiankernel [9:04 PM]:
@David Statman Nothing will compensate for Justin Bieber
CapitalCat [9:04 PM]:
Did Matt Lauer just say, “The Russians are coming”?
Cyd Zeigler [9:04 PM]:
OH the Cypriot brought her dad with her. How cute.
IsItFallYet? [9:04 PM]:
@David Statman and Bieber
toonces_no [9:03 PM]:
we need to get that guy from dominica to dive at sidney crosby’s knees
Justin Cohen [9:03 PM]:
Canada Sucks (the more you know…)
David Statman [9:03 PM]:
although Canada gave us Rush so I can’t be too down on those guys
Izzy Grinspan [9:03 PM]:
Solid toggle coat out of canada
David Statman [9:03 PM]:
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO CANADA
Cyd Zeigler [9:03 PM]:
Reality check: We’re only up to Canada. Ugh.
Cowboycane [9:02 PM]:
Thanks for the wireless receiver, AT&T. Because I’m gonna move my 50" plasma around the house like its a coaster
toonces_no [9:02 PM]:
@CapitalCat Sponsored by Doge Coin.
IsItFallYet? [9:02 PM]:
@toonces_no its like ads that didnt make the cut for the superbowl
CapitalCat [9:02 PM]:
You can’t ban the Caribbean! What about the Jamaican Bobsled team?
toonces_no [9:01 PM]:
Worst commercial ever.
IsItFallYet? [9:01 PM]:
@Jim Buzinski take your politics elsewhere bruh
Rush Roberts [9:01 PM]:
@toonces_no Let’s not rush to judgement. I’m sure “Dal Travers” is a lifelong resident.
David Statman [9:01 PM]:
Soul Calibur > Street Fighter. Yeah, I said it
Cyd Zeigler [9:00 PM]:
The Caribbean needs to be banned from the Winter Games.
Izzy Grinspan [9:00 PM]:
So those escorts with the headgear are Russian snow maidens (obvs): http://russiapedia.rt.com/of-russian-origin/snegurochka/
Jim Buzinski [9:00 PM]:
Cayman Islands? Is Mitt Romney’s banker marching?
toonces_no [9:00 PM]:
I’m just waiting for the announcer to shout MORTAL KOMBAT
Matthew Tennant [9:00 PM]:
More shorts!
Cyd Zeigler [9:00 PM]:
OK, now we’re talking. Kazakhstan has the best unis so far.
IsItFallYet? [9:00 PM]:
@Wiedmann World War I metaphor?
David Statman [9:00 PM]:
the Twitterverse is alive with the sound of Borat jokes
Travis Hughes [8:59 PM]:
somebody’s tryna compete with Apolo Anton Ohno with that soul patch
Cowboycane [8:59 PM]:
Ed Harris is the president of Italy?
Spencer Hall [8:59 PM]:
STREET FIGHTER
Jason Kirk [8:59 PM]:
Soul patch of the decade: Italy
toonces_no [8:59 PM]:
cayman islands? more financial executive cross-country skiers?
Wiedmann [8:59 PM]:
Why is Italy carrying Hungary’s flag?
Spencer Hall [8:58 PM]:
Just disappointed that Iceland’s uniforms aren’t made of seal pelts and ice pixie hides
Cyd Zeigler [8:58 PM]:
OK, where was that guy when I was in Iceland last summer!! No fair.
David Statman [8:58 PM]:
How does Iceland only have 5 guys? THEY HAVE ICE IN THEIR NAME.
IsItFallYet? [8:58 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler Someone has to sweep in curling
David Statman [8:57 PM]:
The Iron Sheik is Iran’s greatest sports hero, yet he is nowhere to be found jabroni
Cyd Zeigler [8:57 PM]:
Nice to see the US Army designed Ireland’s outfits.
Jim Buzinski [8:57 PM]:
Ireland, our uniforms are as dull as our weather
IsItFallYet? [8:57 PM]:
urns
Cyd Zeigler [8:57 PM]:
Well this is a big breakthrough: Iran is allowing women to march next to men.
Matthew Tennant [8:57 PM]:
@Rodger Sherman You can’t just go asking why people are white.
IsItFallYet? [8:57 PM]:
booooooooo
Matt Ufford [8:57 PM]:
the <10 athletes drinking rule is my favorite rule
Jim Buzinski [8:57 PM]:
Iran rocking out Seahawk colors
Rodger Sherman [8:57 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler *Staten. Big difference.
IsItFallYet? [8:56 PM]:
@Spencer Hall lmao
Matthew Tennant [8:56 PM]:
Ja wohl Deutschland!
Rodger Sherman [8:56 PM]:
white zimbabwean dude is making me question all my comprehension of steroetypes
Cyd Zeigler [8:56 PM]:
He lives on Long Island but competes for DOMINICA? Seriously, we all need to commit to being Barbados’ bobsled team in 2018.
Spencer Hall [8:56 PM]:
When you need to bolster your country’s image, you get an Olympics. When you get an Olympics, you have to pay some bribes. When you pay bribes, you go over budget. When you go over budget, you cut some corners. When you cut some corners, you skimp on animal control. When you skimp on animal control, you get stray dogs. When you get stray dogs, one marches as its own country in the Parade of Nations and wins third in men’s short track skating. Don’t be Vladimir Putin putting a medal around a stray dog’s neck. Something something Visa.
IsItFallYet? [8:56 PM]:
… the Dawgs are wracked by off-field troubles apparently.
ximiankernel [8:56 PM]:
Sochi security currently waiting at the exit for the German delegation
toonces_no [8:55 PM]:
hello denmark
Jason Kirk [8:55 PM]:
GO DAWGS
IsItFallYet? [8:55 PM]:
GO DAWGS. wait wut
Cowboycane [8:55 PM]:
GO DAWGS!
David Statman [8:55 PM]:
WHERE’S RICHT
IsItFallYet? [8:55 PM]:
They look like popsicles
Jim Buzinski [8:54 PM]:
Germany — gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay 
ximiankernel [8:54 PM]:
Germany’s attire looks rainbow-y ..
IsItFallYet? [8:54 PM]:
Germany gettin’ their gay on
toonces_no [8:54 PM]:
skittles coats
IsItFallYet? [8:53 PM]:
@ximiankernel I actually joked about that with my friends during the Superbowl. I said something to the effect of “Hey, this game sucks, but at least it’s almost curling season.” Now I’d rather watch the Seahawks beat the shit out of the Broncos every night for the next month.
Spencer Hall [8:53 PM]:
TURN UP, GERMANY
Izzy Grinspan [8:53 PM]:
YESSSS. Finally some exciting uniforms.
Clay Wendler [8:53 PM]:
David Statman [8:53 PM]:
Hunt for Red October is trending right now. We did it, guys
toonces_no [8:53 PM]:
It’s the national meal of Arkansas.
Caroline Darney [8:53 PM]:
I wish I was as excited about anything in my life as the Venezuelan guy was.
Cowboycane [8:53 PM]:
Badass Paralympic skier is badass
Cyd Zeigler [8:52 PM]:
Frito Chicken Enchiladas? Why am I just now hearing about this!!??
GO_Athletes [8:52 PM]:
Venezuela should be recruited by a marching band after that superb flag waving
Rodger Sherman [8:52 PM]:
@David Statman Tim Duncan didn’t qualify in luge :(
Izzy Grinspan [8:51 PM]:
Venezuela guy has a crazy backstory: http://www.thestar.com/sports/sochi2014/2014/02/07/antonio_pardo_venezuelan_skier_captures_hearts_at_sochi_olympics_opening_ceremonies.html
ximiankernel [8:51 PM]:
@IsItFallYet? you have the Norwegian curling team’s pants to look forward to
toonces_no [8:51 PM]:
are they better than the giant beavers from the Vancouver games
Martin Rickman [8:51 PM]:
.@NBC These people must be exhausted why are you making them do the Opening Ceremony again
— Fake Bo Pelini (@FauxPelini) February 8, 2014
IsItFallYet? [8:51 PM]:
The Venezuelans are just stoked to be in a country with abundant supplies of toilet paper.
Jason Kirk [8:51 PM]:
venezuela at the turn up function
— ⟡ Shani O. Hilton ⟡ (@shani_o) February 8, 2014
Spencer Hall [8:51 PM]:
If this is your first time through this; it’s worth waiting just to get to the giant animatronic bears
toonces_no [8:50 PM]:
I didn’t realize the snowmen were dancing to the house music
David Statman [8:50 PM]:
the Virgin Islands Attractiveness Per Athlete Ratio is very high these Games
Cyd Zeigler [8:50 PM]:
I need to move to Curacao so I can be a Winter Olympian.
Rush Roberts [8:50 PM]:
Venezuela dude is my new hero
Travis Hughes [8:50 PM]:
are those the good Virgin Islands?
IsItFallYet? [8:50 PM]:
This is February. No football, no baseball, no meaningful college basketball… just figure-skating bears and Russian dance music. I can’t take this.
Wiedmann [8:50 PM]:
Venezuela excited
Travis Hughes [8:50 PM]:
Venezuela dude is fantastic
Jason Kirk [8:50 PM]:
GET DOWN VENEZUELA
Cyd Zeigler [8:50 PM]:
“Why is Hungary carrying the Italian flag?” – Stupid-American questions
Jim Buzinski [8:50 PM]:
Hungry for some Hungarians!
Cowboycane [8:49 PM]:
I just popped a Molly.
Rush Roberts [8:49 PM]:
Brits dressed like the cops in Fargo
Jim Buzinski [8:49 PM]:
not a fan of britain’s michelin man jackets
toonces_no [8:49 PM]:
bring back the Tron extras
toonces_no [8:49 PM]:
With this music, we need more glowsticks
Cyd Zeigler [8:49 PM]:
At least the British flag bearer has British teeth.
Izzy Grinspan [8:49 PM]:
Great Britian looks maybe kind of badass in those hats.
Cyd Zeigler [8:48 PM]:
Oh my lord in heaven this is brutal. Where’s the Kitten Bowl when you need it?
David Statman [8:48 PM]:
#FreeDarko
Martin Rickman [8:48 PM]:
brazil’s summer outfits >>>>> brazil’s winter outfits
Spencer Hall [8:47 PM]:
Shouts out to the Brazilian dude taking a selfie
Jim Buzinski [8:47 PM]:
Cowboycane [8:47 PM]:
Helloooooo Bosnia
Jim Buzinski [8:47 PM]:
wonder if they’ll show these guys, hands down the hottest i saw:
toonces_no [8:47 PM]:
All your base
IsItFallYet? [8:47 PM]:
@Jason Kirk Bad Dudes?
Jason Kirk [8:47 PM]:
Which video game title screen is this music from?
IsItFallYet? [8:47 PM]:
@toonces_no Isn’t it like sixty degrees in Sochi?
toonces_no [8:46 PM]:
bermudans have to be freezing
Clay Wendler [8:46 PM]:
IsItFallYet? [8:46 PM]:
This isn’t so bad, I was expecting a real shit show
Jim Buzinski [8:46 PM]:
Bermuda shorts, quite fitting but they need a guy with less-skinny legs
Cowboycane [8:46 PM]:
YES THEY WORE THE SHORTS
IsItFallYet? [8:46 PM]:
God I miss football season
Matthew Tennant [8:46 PM]:
Cold? Sounds like Bermuda shorts and long socks weather!
David Statman [8:46 PM]:
Chris Dudley?
ximiankernel [8:46 PM]:
would have been better it there were jorts
Rodger Sherman [8:46 PM]:
Bermuda dude had to wear Bermuda shorts
Jim Buzinski [8:45 PM]:
the Belgians are waffling a bit
ximiankernel [8:45 PM]:
interestingly Russia in Cyrillic makes them last alphabetically
David Statman [8:44 PM]:
@Travis Hughes we gonna have a Israel/Iran pier sixer?
Spencer Hall [8:44 PM]:
@Travis Hughes that’s not awkward at all
Hambone179 [8:44 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler And America in slow motion!
toonces_no [8:43 PM]:
Just wait until some country marches out in sweatpants
Travis Hughes [8:43 PM]:
If anybody’s wondering about the order, it’s based off the Cyrillic alphabet, because Russia. That also means Israel and Iran are back-to-back
Jim Buzinski [8:43 PM]:
@chaimy4life any of those near-balkan countries are filled with hotties
Cowboycane [8:43 PM]:
Nothing says IDGAF like a ball cap, Armenia.
Cyd Zeigler [8:43 PM]:
NBC should seriously broadcast the parade of nations at double speed.
toonces_no [8:42 PM]:
Some serious mustaches in the Belarus delegation
Spencer Hall [8:42 PM]:
I want this map on my floor at home, preferably with the Los Santos GTA 5 map loaded on it
chaimy4life [8:42 PM]:
@Jim Buzinski Greece came out strong in that category.
Cyd Zeigler [8:42 PM]:
Virgin Islands? Somebody’s had Jamaica envy.
Jim Buzinski [8:42 PM]:
No condoms needed for the Virgin islands
Rodger Sherman [8:42 PM]:
YEAH ONE DUDE FROM THE BRITISH VIRGIN ISLANDS
chaimy4life [8:42 PM]:
Fur on the Armenian jackets are the athletes’ own backhair.
Jim Buzinski [8:41 PM]:
some of these countries do pick the hottest flag bearers. go armenia!
djstarion [8:41 PM]:
Is Mr Bean competing for Armenia?
Cyd Zeigler [8:41 PM]:
These uniforms are terrible! It’s like they all forgot their uniforms at home and raided a local Banana Republic in Sochi.
ximiankernel [8:41 PM]:
Overheard: Gay Snowflake refuse to come out at Sochi2014
Jacktherabbi [8:41 PM]:
Argentina will get your car alignment sometime today we promise
Izzy Grinspan [8:40 PM]:
Um, Team Racked loves that sweater
Clay Wendler [8:40 PM]:
andorra brought their awful christmas sweaters
Jim Buzinski [8:40 PM]:
half of andorra is marching in the opening.
Cyd Zeigler [8:40 PM]:
I’m watching at Jim’s house. Had to bring my own alcohol as he doesn’t drink. Sipping a sidecar this evening.
Cyd Zeigler [8:40 PM]:
@Spencer Hall Ha ha. Deal! Though I don’t know if I can suffer through another Opening Ceremony ever. Without a real drinking game, that is.
Rodger Sherman [8:40 PM]:
Rodger Sherman [8:40 PM]:
they didn’t show it, but austria had a fail
Jacktherabbi [8:39 PM]:
I guess every woman hosting a country is a walking Faberge egg
Spencer Hall [8:39 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler Let’s never do this without y’all ever again
Cyd Zeigler [8:39 PM]:
Azerbaijan: “Move over Austria, we can out-boring you!”
Travis Hughes [8:39 PM]:
Cyd Zeigler [8:39 PM]:
Austria: “Let’s create the most boring uniforms we can!”
Cowboycane [8:38 PM]:
Shouldn’t we drink for “white Aussie with dreads”?
Cyd Zeigler [8:38 PM]:
What are those Hunger Games characters carrying the country names?
Wiedmann [8:38 PM]:
@Jim Buzinski Chernobyl is in the Ukraine, and most of the radiation is in Belarus. I was about 50 miles from the site, and went to the museum last year.
David Statman [8:38 PM]:
New York’s hottest club is Sochi. It’s got everything: Lights, flags, Cossacks, a midget that looks like Nick Saban
Matthew Tennant [8:38 PM]:
Does this count as bad Russian techno?
Spencer Hall [8:37 PM]:
No way Putin isn’t getting bottle service
Hambone179 [8:37 PM]:
US is near the end?! Stupid Commies
Rodger Sherman [8:37 PM]:
DRINK for less than ten athletes. We’re going to drink a lot, friends.
Cyd Zeigler [8:37 PM]:
OK the map thing is pretty cool.
Spencer Hall [8:36 PM]:
Ohhhhh Club Rossiya got that live DJ!
Jacktherabbi [8:36 PM]:
Pootin’
David Statman [8:36 PM]:
Dammit Holgorsen why ain’t you recruiting Russia
Clay Wendler [8:36 PM]:
Cowboycane [8:36 PM]:
PAWWWWL that boy is skiin’ uphill that ain’t natchural
Spencer Hall [8:35 PM]:
@Dr. Norris Camacho the prokhorov, he may
Cyd Zeigler [8:34 PM]:
Drink every time you hear Morgan Freeman’s voice
Rush Roberts [8:34 PM]:
Spencer is The Prokhorov going to weigh in on the Olympics?
David Statman [8:34 PM]:
DRAAAAAGOOOOOOOOOOOO
chaimy4life [8:34 PM]:
One of Russia’s greatest sporting moments:
Spencer Hall [8:33 PM]:
The anthem reminds me that the benefit from growing up during part of the Cold War was a) yes, being terrified of Russians, but also b.) thinking they were total badasses
Rodger Sherman [8:33 PM]:
@Cowboycane actually, he did. but he got corrected about it, since those are the athlete’s seats: https://twitter.com/katiebakes/status/431853157720031232
Cyd Zeigler [8:33 PM]:
The best part about the Winter Olympics is the parade of nations is half as long as the Summer Games.
Hambone179 [8:32 PM]:
Someone forgot the hammer and sickle on the flag…
Cowboycane [8:32 PM]:
Has Rovell tweeted pics of empty seats yet?
Jim Buzinski [8:32 PM]:
Those glowing guys must be the group from Chernobyl.
gesteves [8:32 PM]:
I wonder if I can finish this bottle of vodka before the anthem ends
David Statman [8:31 PM]:
Russian anthem is long as hell. Baseball games there must suck
GO_Athletes [8:31 PM]:
Where does one get a light up jacket as snazzy as that
Izzy Grinspan [8:31 PM]:
This is the most boring rave ever.
Cyd Zeigler [8:31 PM]:
Already being reminded why the Opening Ceremony (outside of China) always sucks.
Martin Rickman [8:31 PM]:
how much for one of those light-up coats
LoneStarHoosier [8:31 PM]:
“Give me a ping, Vasily. One ping, only.”
David Statman [8:31 PM]:
In Russia if a man doesn’t have a brilliant baritone singing voice he is sent to a gulag
Matt Ufford [8:30 PM]:
Love the dudes’ stances while singing. Very “come at me bro”
Jim Buzinski [8:30 PM]:
Is that Moscow’s Gay Men’s Chorus?
chaimy4life [8:30 PM]:
They should have brought out Nikolai Volkoff for this.
Izzy Grinspan [8:30 PM]:
http://www.nbcolympics.com/video/russian-police-choir-performs-get-lucky-opening-ceremony
Cowboycane [8:30 PM]:
“let them sing…”
Izzy Grinspan [8:30 PM]:
This is OK, but the policeman’s choir singing Get Lucky is better.
Rodger Sherman [8:30 PM]:
In Russia, nobody saw the rings fail http://www.sbnation.com/lookit/2014/2/7/5391218/russian-tv-covers-up-opening-ceremony-olympic-rings-fail
Cyd Zeigler [8:29 PM]:
Hunt for Red October? Is this the same anthem the Soviets had?
Cowboycane [8:29 PM]:
Russia’s anthem is so bad-ass
Bryan M. Vance [8:29 PM]:
Yo, did we clone Rodger Sherman?
Spencer Hall [8:29 PM]:
LET THEM SING.
Cory Williams [8:29 PM]:
this is a great song. am i a communist?
David Statman [8:29 PM]:
I know the Russians chased my ancestors out of the country and everything, but they have a rad anthem
Rush Roberts [8:29 PM]:
@Spencer Hall BRB need to go watch Hunt for Red October
Matt Ufford [8:29 PM]:
Easily the best part of Hunt for Red October
Spencer Hall [8:28 PM]:
And now stand for the most masculine damn anthem on the planet.
Cyd Zeigler [8:28 PM]:
Somebody is moving to Siberia over that fifth ring.
Wiedmann [8:28 PM]:
Well, someone juts got killed. Wonder who was responsible, check by seeing who will be buried under the Kremlin.
Rush Roberts [8:28 PM]:
@mattufford so beautiful
Clay Wendler [8:28 PM]:
Matt Ufford [8:28 PM]:
Drink per Putin appearance on camera.
Clay Wendler [8:27 PM]:
Cowboycane [8:27 PM]:
PUTIN IN THE VIP YO
Martin Rickman [8:27 PM]:
it’s a good thing i’m not drinking for real through this like i did during the london one
chaimy4life [8:27 PM]:
Unopened ring represents Bob Costas’s diseased eye! #Eyelluminati
LoneStarHoosier [8:27 PM]:
The last ring must have represented Freedom of Speech
Matt Ufford [8:27 PM]:
@Spencer Hall Gotta flex the ’shop muscles occasionally.
Spencer Hall [8:26 PM]:
Holy crap Ufford, I just saw the header image on the drinking game
GO_Athletes [8:26 PM]:
The red olympic ring is not interested in participating in the opening ceremonies apparently…..
djstarion [8:26 PM]:
They should have just replaced the broken ring with Dongcopter
Cyd Zeigler [8:26 PM]:
Hey why am I not featured? I want a STAR!!!!
Jim Buzinski [8:25 PM]:
At least NBC didn’t do what Russian state TV did and show the 5 rings opening from a rehearsal.
Cyd Zeigler [8:25 PM]:
$51B at work.
Cyd Zeigler [8:25 PM]:
The opening ceremony will prove Sochi was the right choice? Ummmmmmm…
Mason Dixon [8:25 PM]:
When’s the part where we get a Russian inside of a Russian inside of a Russian?
Bryan M. Vance [8:25 PM]:
You mean to tell me with Russia’s CG skills, it couldn’t go back and fix the broken ring in post production?
Matt Ufford [8:25 PM]:
technical error = two drinks
Izzy Grinspan [8:24 PM]:
There’s that glitchy ring.
Spencer Hall [8:24 PM]:
I’m not gonna lie: I’d love to wear any of these to Wal-Mart on a Saturday night
Cyd Zeigler [8:24 PM]:
And now actual snow in Sochi. It’s a miracle! God is smiling on them!
Izzy Grinspan [8:24 PM]:
There are so many good hats happening right now, you guys.
Martin Rickman [8:24 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler annie lennox on a boat
David Statman [8:24 PM]:
when is DMX gonna crash the opening ceremonies
Cyd Zeigler [8:23 PM]:
OMG, I just saw a Russian smile!
Matt Ufford [8:23 PM]:
“Simulated flight” was a drink in 2012. Really dropped the ball this time around.
Cyd Zeigler [8:23 PM]:
Nothing is weirder than that London Ceremony.
Travis Hughes [8:23 PM]:
Drinking game: http://www.sbnation.com/2014/2/7/5391484/sochi-2014-opening-ceremony-live-updates-winter-olympics. PLAY IT
Izzy Grinspan [8:23 PM]:
So many animals in the air.
Martin Rickman [8:22 PM]:
we’re only like 5 minutes into this thing and it’s already weirder than all the beds and stuff in london
Bryan M. Vance [8:22 PM]:
Where’s the vodka. I came for the vodka.
Jim Buzinski [8:22 PM]:
@Cyd Zeigler They haven’t been socialist for 20 years! :-)
Cyd Zeigler [8:22 PM]:
Did they starve the horse and cow beforehand to make them eat for the entire performance?
Rodger Sherman [8:22 PM]:
Tchiakovsky. DRINK
Rush Roberts [8:21 PM]:
This is like an opera written by Flight of the Conchords, which is not a bad thing.
Cyd Zeigler [8:21 PM]:
It takes a socialist nation to equal the Chinese. This first set makes me think they just might.
Jim Buzinski [8:21 PM]:
When do the stray dogs make an appearance?
gesteves [8:20 PM]:
Olympics wooo
Travis Hughes [8:20 PM]:
Breaking news from Matt Lauer: Russia is big
Spencer Hall [8:20 PM]:
Russians are dreamers, which is why they go to school naked a lot for no reason
Travis Hughes [8:18 PM]:
And we’re off!
Clay Wendler [8:17 PM]:
Cory Williams [8:17 PM]:
I LOVE YOU AMERICA
Brian Floyd [8:17 PM]:
Let’s ceremony